Uh oh /k/, Jamal and Tyrone just busted into your house, Jamal

I shoot Tyrone with my shotgun, because who the fuck defends their house with just a pistol?

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>>31335907
Your shotgun is incapacitated in this scenario, it doesn't want to be wielded by some cheeky cocksucker ignoring the question and changing the scenario so he can avoid properly answering, and is in hiding from you.

>>31335907
this except with a rifle
your premise sucks and you're a terrible DM OP.

>>31335898
>Implying I don't want their superior genetics in my wife's children


It's like you don't want to advance the human race, OP

>>31335952
>cuckposting
>current year

>>31335958
I don't really keep up with the meme trends.

Is that one over?

Or is current year posting currently at its own height, and I've been counter memed?

>>31335981
both

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>>31335898
Pfff I just pull out my machete.

>>31335989
Well shit. I'll try to improve my protestive shit posting in the future

>>31335948
Snubby 38 it is.

>>31336335
It took 6 shots of .38 to bring Jamal down
back to the actual question

>>31336381
I shot Jamaal with my HK which melted for some reason. Jesus, read the fucking OP.

I rape tyrone to death
>roll for crit

>be me
>be inmahouse
>heard strange noise
>bettercheck.jpg
>"DOGGO ?"
>doggo doesn't respond
>I take my USP Tactical .45ACP with it's streamlight TLR1s because it's quite dark
>"DOGGO ?"
>stillnoresponse from german sheperd best pupper
>wtf.jpg
>doggo is on the ground
>doggo not moving
>mfw then killed doggo to get in
>fucking niggers they're not going outside my house like that after this
>the garage door is closed. It should be open because doggo
>heard noise on the left side of the door
>shoot through door to left side five times
>hear scream, burst in like muhrine through the door
>Jamal is on the floor, still moving
>I light him up with my TLR1s and the strobe is going too quickly.
>as I shoot him one last time, I can't bear the heat anymore
>look at my gun
>mfw TLR1s melted my HK USP Tacticool .45ACP
>heard scared noise behind me
>he tried to flank me
>clevergirl.jpg
>I get Jamal's katana
>I can already see that it's a shitty blade
>Tyrone is not backing down. He's saying with his stupid look in his eyes
>"HE DINNDU NOTHIN' WRONG, CHINK"
>That's right. I'm half asian. And I've got a katana.
>Through the superior power of racist thoughts, I make him shit his pants as I slowly put the katana to my side.
>"You killed my dog, you wanted to steal my dog. Where is Iosef ?"
>thatsrightmotherfucker.jpg
>imjohnwick

>halfasianjohnwick
>Also I ditched the P30 because muh stuppin' power and also the H&K match trigger bro
>anyway back to fight
>he's scared to death
>"it's my garage, you fucking nigger"
>grabsfedorah
>tip it
>"Que le meilleur gagne"
>I charge
>He charges
>too slow because poopypants
>I cut his wrist open, he drops the machete
>"This is for USP"
>I thrust my katana through his wrist
>"This is for the fucking mess you're making in my house"
>I drop the katana and start to mightingly hit him with my right fist. Again. And again. And again.
>my hand is hurting
>his face is nothing more than red on shitty colorskin
>more and more red
>I keep going
>"we...dinndu..."
>I hit him in the mouth so he shuts it. His white teeths go all over in hit. I take my fedorah and put it in
>"shut the fuck up"
>I continue to hit him, again and again
>finally he doesn't move anymore
>I keep going for at least ten seconds because of rage
>"This was for doggo"
>I get up, open the garage door
>Ten niggers looking at me, half scared, half wanting to kill me
>unzip pants
>pee on Tyrone to show dominance
>they run away
>I cry
>They killed doggo

cont if you like it

>>31336946
You can stop, its not funny...like, at all.

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>>31336971
t b h I was giggling because it was so unfunny that I knew it'd make other anons mad.
So do continue.

>>31336971
but anon, it's not meant to be funny
it's real
I'm in jail

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>>31335898
>and you shot him but your HK melted in your hands/your glock blew up

When will this meme end? If this really happened, I'd tell Tyrone to kill, because I deserved it for fall for the Glock meme. It saddens me knowing that I sleep with my G17, and it won't even actually protect me when I need it most. It's like I'm willingly choosing to completely fuck myself over and incapacitate myself in a home defense situation.

>>31336981
Yes please :^)

>the cops are coming
>fuck already ?
>I continue pissing on Tyrone
>"A TERRE, LACHEZ VOTRE ARME"
>"C'est ma bite"
>get shot in the dick with flashball
>wake up in jail
>mfw I'm going to the same prison as Salah Abdeslam
>sweet revenge incoming

>hear noise
>Middle of the night
>Waking around house in my underwear with a gun
This never happened before I came to /k/

>>31336946
>>too slow because poopypants
Oh God, why am I laughing?

>>31336004
so you are expecting that the melanin enriched gentleman are attacking with dicks out.
so you incapacitate them with your fleshlight?

>>31335898
I throw my glock at them. One of them takes it and it explodes, incapacitating both of them

>>31335898
I get my korbschläger and beat his face to a pulp

>>31335898
Do most of you have pistols for home defense? I thought that rifles or shotguns would work much better... they are "primary" guns after all. Right or no?

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>>31335949
Underated post.

>>31335981
buddy it's all just unfunny retards reciting old jokes you don't have to follow that hard

>>31336004
>2016
>Still using a flashlight that runs on a 6v battery

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>>31338727
>flashlight
>flash

>>31338727
Kek