So today I ate a bunch of Perks and a bunch of Xanax and drank

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So today I ate a bunch of Perks and a bunch of Xanax and drank lots of beers. So I was pretty hammered
I thought it would be a fun to go into by back yard and shoot My AK47 off of my back deck
So i shoot a couple hundred rounds into the hill than i pull out my 40 cal glock 22 and unload 3 mags into the hill
To finish i pull out my snubnose 357 and shoot 10 into the hill
Shooting probably 250 to 350 rounds only lasted about 20 minutes
Next thing I know there is a knock on my door and there are 8 cops and 5 cop cars in my driveway
FUCKKKK
Apparently the new neighbors are 2 gay dudes and they called the cops
So now the 1 gay guy is runnin down just as I answer the door
The cops ask if i was shooting and than the gay dude blurts out "My boyfriend has been curled up in the room terrified and crying for the last 30 minutes"
What the fuck. I roll my eyes.
Now remember im Hammered from pain pills, xanax and beers
The cops ask if i was doing the shooting.
I say yeah i was shooting. there was a racoon and they shouldnt be out in the day
We walk around back and there are about 300 empty shells on the ground
Main cop says you shot all of these to kill a coon that would only be about 20 feet away
I say yeah he was fast
He says "well wheres the coon"
Cop jokes sayin I must be a bad shot and asks how much i have been drinking
I said im as sober as a nun
Cop says Sure, So wheres the coon
I say oh he got away I wasnt trying to hit him, i was just trying to shoot close to him and scare him away
Cop says Dude thats the biggest bullshit story i have ever heard.
Than he says im far enough from the other homes and the road its 100% legal for me to shoot into the hill behind my house anyway
I say Really and he says yep
Than he says next time you shoot and we have to come down because your neighbor is a bitch just tell us right off of the bat you were shooting and we would have been gone 10 min ago
Dam MFW i gave the biggest BS story for no reason and now hate my new neighbor