We all know that this suitcase, known as the Football, contains

>thinking anyone on /k/ knows the nuclear launch protocol

>>28424732
Won't stop us from making shit up, but i heard if you lose a launch code the nuke is bricked.

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>>28424690
>But what if something happened to it? What if it got lost or stolen? How long would it take to get a replacement?
What if some gangster got a hold of it and tried smoking it innajoint?

What if Obama promised to keep it safe and forgot about his promise?

What if the Jews tried to purchase it from the state?

What if the Chinese captured it, and began mass producing knock offs to corner the American market for launch code briefcases?

You need to ask the real questions.

>>28424690
The size of that thing. You think they would have written a mobile app to replace that suitcase.

>>28424814
>being efficient
You're terrible at being a politician
Also you can't hack a briefcase.

>>28424814
Launch coordinates are programmed with 5 3/4 inch floppies.

>>28424690
I'm pretty sure submariners can just launch nukes whenever.

>>28424822
Dude, those little three digit locks are easy to crack.

>>28424814
Post nudes of Carmen

>>28424825

I thought the silos still had 8" floppies

the Football doesn't "contain" nuclear launch codes, it's just a heavily protected man-portable laptop so that the President/whoever's in chain of command can have first/retaliatory strike capabilities whenever necessary.
The idea that "codes" are somehow a physical thing or that the launch authorization data would be carried around in a little suitcase is just fucking Bond villain lunacy

>>28424690
Literally there are spares, they just are well protected. The launch protocol involves more than just the suitcase, there are special computer key cards too.

>>28424867
No i mean you can't download porn on a briefcase.

>>28424912
if it was a laptop they could get a cheap one which would be a fraction of the size.

>>28424961
it needs to be just as physically and electronically protected as an airplane blackbox if it's securely connected to military/government launch systems

>>28424975
does it work like the scene in red alert 2 where a silo commander picks up a phone?

>>28424882
They updated them a bit in the 80s.

>>28424814

And what, create thousands of attack vectors for a cyber attack on the device? No thanks.

>>28424732
>He missed OPenheimer

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>>28424690

How to take down america

> Acquire .50 BMG like a boss
> Use your new shooty to destroy nuclear briefcase (but stay brief on such case)
> Launch strike against US of A as the try to call the nuclear briefcases hotline in mumbaÏ
> I guess that's it, once again muh fiddy ftw

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>>28424690
This happened somewhat during the Clinton Administration. The carrier of the "nuclear football", Lt. Col Robert "Buzz" Patterson, USAF (Ret.), wrote a tell-all book about his time there, ("Dereliction of Duty: The Eyewitness Account of how Bill Clinton Compromised America's National Security"), and while its mostly a standard Clinton dirty laundery book of the time, does have some mention about Bill Clinton disregarding the importance of that suitcase, not caring about its whereabouts and such. Its has been many years since I read that book, so I forget many details.

>>28424690

why is the coast guard carrying the launch codes

>>28425297
Half of /k/ struggles with what to do with their CCW while taking a shit, while Clinton had to worry about an entire briefcase while getting head from a chubby intern.

>>28424860
>whenever
fuckyourprotocol.jpg

>>28424814
I could see it now
>"get the pro version and you will have unlimited access to your nukes without any adds"

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>>28424690
dat cutting edge 1980s bag phone technology...

>>28425270
the football covers first strike capabilities

retaliatory strikes are already pre-established responses.

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>>28424867
yfw the code to open the nuclear football is 12345

>>28426053
kek

>>28424737
That is why the launch codes are straight zeroes.
Seriously you set the dials to 0 across the board and push the fuck off button.

>>28426166

>five digits security code

m8, its probably 1234, at best.
and chances are, it's still 0000, 'cause this is default settings...

>>28426166
That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard; that the combination a moron would have on his luggage.

>>28424825
>with 5 3/4 inch floppies.

it's 5.25", you primitive!

>>28424690
The football does not contain codes to launch the missiles.
It contains a list of attack options and codes that are used to authenticate himself to the chain of command.
This way the people receiving the orders know that the president himself issued them.

If they are lost replacements can be issued in a short period of time by the NSA

>>28425306
The armed forces share the duty.

>>28426901
Thank you, Oppenheimer.

It's all BS it's literally a football signed by all the presidents. Designed to make people think they carry that information in a brief case.
All they do is pull out a special cell phone, hit the encrypt call button and bam they're in business.

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>>28425297
>Bill Clinton disregarding the importance of that suitcase, not caring about its whereabouts and such.

It's not the President's job to keep track of the "football", it's the job of the military officer who is carrying carrying it around, to keep track of the President.

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>>28426166
http://foreignpolicy.com/2014/01/21/air-force-swears-our-nuke-launch-code-was-never-00000000/

I believe this also comes up in Eric Schlosser's excellent Command and Control.

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>>28424814
Dude yr channel needs work. Didn't want to hate in comments or "dislike" but felt like waste of time.
>like this is
But worse
ALOE WORSE

>>28424690
What branch is that uniform from? Shit. Did someones change uniforms again?

>>28427414
Coast guard.

>>28427441
That's actually what I thought, but I was under the impression that Coast Guard never carried the Football.

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>>28424747

> get president a Thinkpad with super encryption to handle nuclear business
> keep gigantic "football" bags
> stuff them with random shit like dragon dildos, wet naps and some old Kmart burner phone with the number to Domino's programmed into it
> be super-irresponsible with "football"
> football gets stolen by dindus or ISIS fags
> tfw they open it and find a note reading "Cheeky Breeki!"

>>28427596
>spaces

>>28427414
>branch

DHS.

USCG is not a branch of the Armed Forces, they're under DHS.

And that's not just good old-fashioned Jew-hating talk. It's policy now.

>>28427746
Being under the DHS doesn't actually preclude you from being an Armed Force.

According to the US Code, the Coast Guard is both.

You'd know this if you weren't a newfag.

>>28427801
you don't have a fucking clue what you are talking about... also yes I know that USCG is considered an "armed force" as per UCMJ Art. 1 and 10 U.S. Code § 802 - Art. 2.

They are still combined under the DHS directives effective 2003.

You'd know this if you weren't such an autistic faggot.

>>28427746
Ok, here we go again.

The US has 7 uniformed services. Members of these services are all issued the same type of ID card, the Common Access Card (CAC). The affiliation (branch) of the member will be listed on the card. Please note that your DD Form 2 or CAC doesn't say Armed Services, it says Uniformed Services.

Of the 7 services, 5 are armed services. Of the 5 armed services, 4 are lumped together under DoD and 1 (USCG) is under DHS.

By law, the CG is a military branch and also a LE entity.

>>28427997
what are the 7?

>>28427997
He's got you beat bro.
Article references and US code proves it

>>28427894
so it's policy that the uscg is dhs now due to the dhs directives, but the usmj and us code are just bits of paper.

right.

>>28428072
lolwut

>>28428061
Public health
National oceanic and atmospheric

>>28428061
The other 2 are the NOAA Commissioned Corps and the PHS Commissioned Corps.

The guy who runs the PHSCC is actually a general. That's why they call him the Surgeon General.

>>28428089
>>28428090

Do they arm the NOAA Commissioned Corps?

Does the Surgeon General carry an M9 or a #10 blade?

>>28428113
The reason those services exist is so that people doing medical work or surveying work get POW rights under the Geneva Convention.

They're uniformed services, but not armed services.

>>28428120

Very interesting. Wonder how that works when they're with USAID or some other NGO in a shit 3rd world country.

>>28428162
Generally, if they need muscle, that's what the five uniformed services that are armed services are for.

Hence why Obama sent the Marines to deal with the Ebola epidemic in West Africa. They were they to keep the doctors safe from being burned as witches long enough for them to control the epidemic.

>>28428086
i'm saying he's cherry picking

>>28424690
>Carries the Football
>Not even visibly armed

I know there is probably protocol about who is allowed to carry around the President but holy shit.

>>28424690
they don't keep the fucking nuke codes in a suitcase you idiot

>>28428404

He's not going to have an M4 slung across his chest. He undoubtedly carries a pistol and the rest of the secret service isn't far away with M4s, P90s and shotguns.

>>28425036
Pretty certain that'd just be a component of the security measures. You get your telegram with the launch codes, AND you get a call from a guy who gives you ANOTHER code. Redundancy, nothing happens because of a single guy, kinda deal.

>>28424912
>>28424936

What about some sort of biological key code? Retinal scanner programmed to recognize the president/VP/Speaker of the House, etc? That would be very interesting.

>>28427262
This. The football carrier is told to stay between the President and his destination so he doesn't get left behind.

The guy who lost Clinton had to run a couple of block back to the White House with the football.

>>28424975
>if it's securely connected to military/government launch systems
Its not.
The football enables the President to communicate with the chain of command, and verify who he is to the chain of command, and it contains a binder with Attack Options inside.

The President gives "authorization" to use nuclear weapons, he does not give the "codes" themselves (which are not really codes like most are thinking).
Weapons that require unique signals to enable have systems that generate these unique signals. Depending on the exact weapon, it can be a alphanumeric sequence that is entered into this signal generator, and this is often times what people are thinking of when they think about launch codes.
These are examples of a Permissive Action Link. There are other types. The codes themselves may be kept in the launch facility, along with several other codes. These codes may be sealed in a breakable plastic case (called a biscuit) with an identifier on the outside.
The weapon crew receives a message that contains the authentication from the President or his lawful successor, as well as the biscuit identifier. The crew selects the correct card, breaks it, and inputs the 'code' into the signal generator.
Once the weapon has enabled, it can be launched.

Of course all this can be bypassed by STRATCOM from the TACAMO plane. There are two officers on board. They are the Airborne Launch Control System controllers. When ordered, they can issue launch orders directly to ICBM silos directly, bypassing the Launch Control Centers.

>>28428404
Hes got nuke codes, hes better armed than half the military.

He's also probably swarmed by secret service 24/7

>>28430410
God bless you Oppenheimer

>>28425306
That person is a Mil-Aide, there's one from every branch of service, and they rotate out every so often, woth the people doing a certain length tour as a milaide.
the briefcase is just a tough tough-book laptop, with some satcom and special crypto.
its the mil-aides job to maintain the case, not the pres.

>>28428404
The mil aide is never armed, just secret service and the ceremonial guard near Marine one

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>>28430410
I love you Oppy