OH SNAP! Yukari just played a prank on you and gapped you into

Go wherever the eternal Tao leads me.

>>15859644
I want to be adopted by a youkai!

begin eating the flowers

>>15859652
She leads you to the Blazblue thread. Who are you gonna main in Centralfiction?

Aquinas spoke of the mythical City on the Hill. Soon that city will be a reality, and we will be crowned its kings.

Or better than kings. Gods.

>>15859644
Surely I'll be fine with this handy map provided?

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>>15859704

>>15859644
This is my hill! Nameless no longer
Youkai better step the fuck back!

>>15859718
>They rename it 'Dick Hill' or 'Hill of the Dick'

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Where do I go to meet Suika, Yuugi and Kasen?

I wanna fug the onis.

>>15859779
Did Yukari gap her nipples too?

>>15859796
Can't show her nipples here dood, janny gets angry.

I probably wouldn't survive: I'd try to survive for the novelty of trying to find the human village, but I'm fine with any outcome as long as it's painless.

>>15859700
>buying BB
Nope.
They release far too fast for that.

>>15859644
Needs Kasens dojo and the buddhist temple.

It's wrong too, in PCB we went to the netherworld, we didnt cross Sanzu or see Komachi.

>>15859850
Are you saying you personally removed her nipples just to post her here?

>>15859644
Head to the SDM, try and get a job involving helping with the random tasks involved to attending the whims of a smugpire and her hyperactive sister in exchange for basic alive stuff, being smugged at, and hopefully the privilege to give headpets with potential promotions to behind the pointed ears petting and wing joint tickling.

Will probably come with the condition of being nibbled once or twice a month.

>>15859644
no, I'll dead but in some years the wild lilies will be near extintion thanks me and the foreign seeds

>>15859644
Realistically, live in the boring human village while avoiding youkai all together

Give me spell cards and that's a different story

>>15859644
What do the humans think of Reimu and her antics?

Bring the one true religion that denies all gods but one. Bring knowledge to the human inhabitants and deny all myths.

Watch as Gensokyo crumbles and the humans in it are finally free.

>>15860133
What would you think of a chunni little girl with actual power?

>>15860155
I'd be horrified and run away from her general direction.

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>>15860153
>Bring the one true religion that denies all gods but one
>the humans in it are finally free

>>15860153
>the humans in it are finally free
There's a prison outside Gensokyo also.

>>15860153
Jokes on you, I'm teaming up with Rumia and killing any humans who bring ideas incomatible with Gensokyo.
The outside world is shit, the less like it the better.

>>15860153
Buts that's canon OP
They exterminated the demons in the outside world

>>15859644
The Hill is nameless or it name is Nameless ?

>>15860222
Agreed, outside of the dated lifestyle, Gensokyo doesn't seem that bad off for humans. Better the youkai than the "jews" /pol/ call the 1% fuckers.

>>15859779
Post link to version with nipples, reverse searching gives nothing

>>15859779
NIPPLES!!!!

>>15859644
>Nameless Hill

I'm already dead then, that place is quite dangerous.

First of all, locate the village.
Second, secure a source of food and a shelter, income preferably as it will be useful later, at this point I'm "safe"
Step three, locate Marisa's house, make plans for a break in, once the necessary conditions are met, a incident would be perfect as nobody would be paying too much attention to me), ransack it for magic books and small trinkets
Step four: start studying magic, especially focus on enchanting items, artificing and golem making, might be necessary to raid the house multiple times and once I have some anti detection magic go to Alice's.
Step five, secure magical components and tech in secrecy, magic crystals are useful so applying the methods used to grow crystals industrially could be used to obtain a large supply.
Step six, secure a information channel to the outside world, the more tech I can recreate and magically enhance the better.
Step six, create a automated magitech system for magic development, this will take long but once in place I'll be able to catch up and probably surpass most things. At the same time invest heavily into warding and defence systems, the whole setup must be snoop proof, even by Yukari itself.
Step seven, secure a bit of Lunarian technology, even a sample, for reverse engineering.
Step eight, from both magical and technological advancements, create a self sustaining and self evolving system tied to me, use it to gather informations about lunarian tech and how to replicate it.
Step nine, find a way to send a automated replicator to some other planet, lunarian tech should be able to survive Mercury and Venus so Mars should not be the only avenue. Use these bases to expand production and elaboration capacity and send more probes.
Step ten, merge fully with the elaboration system/industrial base, this will allow me to create backups of my personality and be able to elaborate more informations per second while making use of the flexibility of human mental engrams.
Step eleven, build a military force, ideally should be able to defeat or at least hold off the lunarian army should it interfere.
Step twelve, stage a series of events that will ultimately cause a upheaval in Gensokio's power structure, the more they infight the better as it will be easier to clean up later, crucial would be to have Reimu agains as many powerful youkais as possible in a kill or be killed fashion, this will remove most threats and prevent a coordinated effort
Step thirteen, amidst the chaos, launch a decapitation strike against surviving elements of the youkai power structure, this includes Yukari itself
Step fourteen, assuming lunarians have not interfered, most if not all of the youkai leaders are dead, Reimu is either dead or with her reputation down in the shitter and there is still general chaos, step in and restore order in a markedly pro-human arrangement.
Step fifteen, once all is done, gather up the forces, abandon the planet, fuck off into space doing science and observing the universe's evolution

>>15860252
Gensokyo is simpler and generally lets you live more freely, it's also alive and vibrant, where our world is locked in an almost stagnant state that only changes for the worse. People have dreams, only to grow up and have soul crushing jobs that occupy most of their time until death, all while political organizations and mega corporations drag you around.
You may be eaten by youkai, but atleast Gensokyo would be more fun, and give you a brief feeling of enjoying life.

>>15860816
A neet could never achieve this.
Eirin and Yukari would fuck you up, and powerlevels are broken. Yuyuko's death ability is unique and you cant resist in any way.
Eirin is just unkillable and has a huge headstart in magic and tech.

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>>15860529
>>15860513
>>15859918
http://danbooru.donmai.us/posts/746108
Only 23 pages with "Ibuki_Suika nude", you could have done it yourself.

To be honest, it was much faster for me to find it from there than from my messy touhou folder.

Still back to my question, where would I go to fug the onis? This is important for my fapfic. Does Suika still hang out at Reimu's?

I'd head to the Scarlet Devil Mansion. Given Remilia's very old age, European ancestry, and fondness for reading, she's probably one of the only people in Gensokyo who speaks English. I could explain my situation to her and work out a plan from there.

>>15861078
Cute.
Meiling wont let you in.
As an outsider, Remi may see you as food. She may also find your knowledge of her disturbing.

>>15860155
It's not chuuni if you actually ARE a magic-wielding shrine maiden who fights man-eating monsters.

>>15859644
I quickly collapse due to my lungs failing due to the sheer volume of suzuran poison in the air and become just another corpse on the hill. Medicine likely just ignores the body.

Anywhere else it's try and get to the village then to the go home route of Reimu punting my ass home.

Still 95% odds that I become just another dead Outsider

>>15860816
We know from WaHH that Yukari is very much aware of any kind of circumventing of the barrier. Had you somehow not been caught already she would stop you right there.

The mages have more knowledge of magic than you ever could, even Marisa.

Eirin is about a good thousand times older than you and her whole gimmick is her intelligence, she'd shut you down with tech easy. Even disregarding her Kanako has the military and engineering might of the Kappa on her side as well as tengu informational warfare.

Reimu by nature of who she is can't be beaten.

Sit down and be good faith cattle, smelly NEET!

>>15861043
>http://danbooru.donmai.us/posts/746108
>You need a gold account to see this image.
really nigger?

>>15861043

And if anything Suika rapes you because you can't beat an oni. Hope you like pegging because she's gonna make you squeal like a piggy

>>15861327
It's image 13235663 on pixiv.

>>15861141
>Meiling wont let you in.
Sit outside the gate in protest on a hunger strike. After a few days of starving outside the mansion, people will be talking about me, and maybe Remilia will want to see what all the fuss is about.

I'd make my way to the Bamboo Forest. Hopefully I get abducted or tricked by Tewi and can beg to live as a servant in the palace.

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Build a goddamn wall, brick by brick.
>no materials
Suck my corndog, I will gut youkai just for building materials. I am going to prove to Yukari that being a border hag means you can't enter the new realm I will create.

>>15859644
Beyond all the other obvious errors this map makes like HGK's location, it's odd that they missed something as blatant as the fact that the SDM should be across the lake starting from the Hakurei Shrine.

>>15862049
It's not that bad, there's not exactly much geographic information in Touhou to work from.

>>15861043
>you need a gold account to view this image
I can't believe people still use boorus with closed-source anti-user software.

>>15862202
I can't believe people still don't use better_better_booru.

>>15861378
Heh, you cad.

>>15859644
I try to make it to the village and try Keine to like me. As long as she does and I'm near her, I'll be safe.

Okay, now that I fapped to Suika, we can keep discussing.

>>15859959
I want Mistress Remilia to give ME a headpat for being such a good maid while Sakuya watches and giggles!

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>>15865111
But I want to give the cute smugpire and her cute sister headpets!

>>15867623
Who says you can't have both?

You know what they say: Sometimes you pat the smugpire, and sometimes the smugpire pats you.

>>15860153
Everyone would laugh at you because they already have gods. You'd be the village idiot

>>15867671
...These are acceptable terms.

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I'd pray to Yuckarin for the ability to understand and communicate in 日本語.

After that I would either go to the Eientei or the village in order to get some help. Maybe Reimu will take me in for odd works and being some kind of oddity.

>>15859644
Run like hell and try to enter human village before dying due to poison.

>>15860232
both

>>15862202
>>15861327
you could search in gelbooru too and why is under gold account if suka isn't a child?

>>15860226
not all, shinki and makai by extend still exist

>>15862202
>>15861327
Aren't there scripts that get around the gold account bullshit? Just install one of those.

>>15860153
>the whole post
what kind of fanatical nonsense is this?

>>15860222
so, you are a youkai too

>>15871000
/jp/ is a good, God-fearing board

>>15860816
between four and five easy exist a gap of ten years, likely more

>>15860226
not all of them

see: mamizou

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Starting off to say that i'm royally fucked because I don't fucking speak fucking the native language here.
What Wild Horned Hermit taught me is that the whole barrier thing makes you loop so if I was smart and headed towards the mountain would be a good start. Bad start is going south an ending back where i was wasting time.
Road splits 3 ways. Defiantly fucked going north, Hopefully there is some indication that the village is east, West looks fucked.
If I was smart and made it to the village I would get work even though I can't speak or understand shit. That would be the hard part.

Spend a good year or two probably homeless in feudal japan trying to learn a language and working in housing development or working the fields farming whatever they fucking grow in Gensokyo while fending for my life against youkai trying to eat my guts unless I stay in the village at night so they say.

This is fucked OP.

>Good thing I know how to make a snare
>Good thing I know how to fish and scale.
>Good thing I know some edible wild plants but in this fucking place I might be fucked and I can't identify shit because this is like fucking Japan. I only know north american plants.

>>15871296
Just bring invasive plant seeds and weeds as a Yukari preventative.

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>>15871351
You're on to something Anon. If I can get a hold of some pot seeds I can make a fucking killing marijuana in this place.
Still need time to get my boots on the ground then own a small field. Of course start small...
If I was homeless, I would make enough to own some property because I don't think I can be room-mates with people in feudal japan.
After I start small by growing a good 50 pots of plants out back or on the fucking roof if I have to (because everyone lives in shacks) and meanwhile working in farming or construction of fishing till the plants grow their buds because I still need to make money somehow.
As a side hobby, I would make pipes because joints are out of the question.

I would work my way up from their as a business selling dope in Gensokyo. Slowly work cultivation in pot to make a living.

None of that would matter if I don't get a hold of some seed first though.

>>15871005
I fucking wish. Shame Yukarin and Reimu will punish me for transcending my weak human state. I just want to keep Gensokyo pure, and free of modern world pitfalls.
GAS MORIYA SHRINE!

>>15871351
I like to think some plants are ok, Yuuka has sunflowers. A few plants to make more alcohol should be fine, only sake is boring.

>>15871400
Not happening. Japan still had weed around the time Gensokyo was made iirc. ZUN just avoids the issue for obvious reasons.

[X] Jump into the lake

[X]Genuflect

[X] Reproduce

>>15859644
Go to the human village, find a guide to the Hakurei Shrine. Then, I try to convince Reimu to take me to the Moriya Shrine somehow, as Sanae is far more likely to understand English than Reimu. See if she can't teach me Japanese via either teaching or miracles. If she can, I proceed to find Marisa's home and try to convince her to take me in as an apprentice. If she can't, I try to get a lift to the SDM to try to get a job/learn some Japanese.

My biggest limitation isn't youkai, but rather not being able to talk to anyone.

>>15861272
Why aren't you wearing a mask to filter poisons 24/7?

>>15859644
If I got teleported during work in my combat gear then I could make a living killing youkai or something.

Then I could ravage the corpses or something fun like that

>>15873701
>killing youkai
Guns won't do much to youkai, friend.

>>15859644
>Makai
not canon

>>15873815
that is, there's no makai behind the shrine

instead, it's the underground/eventually old hell

You reach Makai via flying boat

>>15873739
the blessed (or natural cursed) ones surely will works

>>15859644
>and you end up on the Nameless Hill
So I'm already dead, thanks for putting me next to one of the most deadly youkais who can't control her powers.

Get Sanae to wake me the fuck up

>>15874544
Yukari is a dick

>>15871812
[X] Call out for Tewi

>>15859644
I probably die because that hill is full of poison flowers and ruled by an insane newborn youkai that wants to poison everything

>>15874544
It was stated somewhere that if you act like you hate humans you have a chance

>>15874591
>get mugged/tricked out of all of your moneys

Try to reach human village, then admit. Introduce remilia to syringes, so she can drink blood from humans without killing them

>>15879682
>so she can drink blood from humans without killing them
She already does that.

>>15879682
Why wouldn't you want Remilia to bite your neck?

>>15879697
>>15879701

Isn't being bitten by her problematic regardless of the amount of blood she drinks?

>>15859644
>find someone
>''excuse me where's the human village and the hakurei maiden's shrine? oh thanks''

It's not that hard.

>>15881073
New record for fastest death: 17s.

i start shouting memes and acting retarded so noone would want to kill me

>>15881073
>"Is that soooo~?"

i never go outside so i will probably die before i reach the road

>>15859779
Throw a party to meet Suika.

Go to the underworld to meet Yuugi (extremely dangerous).

Go to the shrine to meet Kasen.

>>15861043
http://gelbooru.com/index.php?page=post&s=view&id=912117

I am from one of the worst shit holes in this fucking world.

I had to walk alone like 10miles without a single drop of water in the top of a fucking volcano.

I had to drive for places where you can die if you no pay enough attention.

Sometimes I fall asleep hearing the sweet sound of asault rifles firing in the distance. Just to hear later their bullets falling in my yard.

but even I know if I have to go to Gensokyo, I am so fucking dead.

>>15882970
Where the hell do you live?

Become an hero and get back to this world.

>>15884299
I can't read ant.

I've done so paranormal things in the past I'll be fine. While I'm certainly not as powerful as some important character I know enough about magic to hold my own against them.

>>15884475
>I know enough about magic to hold my own against them.
I dont care if it's /x/ territory, story time.
Tell us about your attempts to emulate worst girl.

>>15884595
Back off dude, don't peer pressure him.

What's even the point of Gensokyo if it's such a shithole you just die?

Free the humans and end youkai oppression.

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>>15884595
To put it bluntly, I was in a situation where I had to fight against something I couldn't understand so I imagined a sword that could destroy anything instantly and it became a reality. It was the beginning of a long journey into the paranormal, full of battles, hardships and mysteries, only to end with my inability to accept myself destroying everything.
Those are what I consider to be the only happy moments of my entire life.

>>15884659
Well without Genso the rest of the world would be the shithole instead.

>>15881142
Sounds like you've read a really awful cringey retarded circlejerked to death fanfic there anon.

>>15884716
Are you the bone of your sword?

Travel to the human village and hopefully don't get eaten by a Youkai on the way

After that I'd probably just live out a normal human existence and draw and stuff

>>15884659
>Human World
Death by everything
>Gensokyo
Death by Everything
>Pokemon World
If you don't have Pokemon it's still probably death by everything

Go to human village and have a sensual Teacher/assistant relationship with Keine

>>15885376
Nah, I was a cynical anti-hero who cared little for those around him. I was never a 'superhero' at any point in time.

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>>15884303

[x] die

Prostrate myself and beg for Medicine to keep me alive as her personal slave knowing she's the only one around who can stop me from dying to the poison.

[x] Grow sugarcane, make sugary drinks and sell them

>>15871760
Not really, pretty sure It's okay for a human to become a youkai as long as you haven't settled yourself in the village before.

>>15890800
Outsiders are kinda out of the rules

>>15859644
The only way for me to get taken there against my will is if I was not ready, as in I did not have time to grab some stuff or worse, I'm butt naked.
I would most likely die, if not by the yokai then of exposure.

>>15873525
That's a nice plan

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>>15859644
I'd rather be in Middle-earth tbqh.

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>>15890923
Can she send me to the medieval where I belong?

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>>15891727
>>15890923
Mean to reply to >>15859644

>>15871760
>Not happening. Japan still had weed around the time Gensokyo was made iirc. ZUN just avoids the issue for obvious reasons.
And honestly could you imagine a stoned, shitfaced Suika.
Who would want that?

>>15859644
Try to find reimu before I get screwed over by the fairies or tewi

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>>15891841
>or tewi
It's too late for that goytsider.

>>15891841
>>15891952
https://exhentai.org/g/891307/f00be4af97/

>>15891841
but if you find tewi you'll get good luck

If my cards are played right and I'm lucky enough to get to the Human Village, I'll just wait around until I can find a witch or wizard and beg to become their disciple~

>>15887272
Faker

Go see rinnosuke to get some money by selling my stuff, a working cellphone should be interesting for, also knowledge of outside world, wait for Reimu to appear there. Ofc if I don't get killed on the way

>>15900758
Good luck for her perhaps

>>15914411
I wonder how tewi isn't exploiting her ability and scamming humans