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/brit/

This is a blue board which means that it's for everybody (Safe For Work content only). If you see any adult content, please report it.

Thread replies: 304
Thread images: 72

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BEADY edition
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West Berkshire
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cant decide if i should go fire or ministry tonight, help me /brit/
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anime
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yuzie
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Ah yes, another wasted friday night
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josie is tim's daughter
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Ever been in a public place and thought "everyone here is a real person except me"?
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south yankashire
>>
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me on the left
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NEED memes in my life to mask the crippling depression haha
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>>77685238
the opposite
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>>77685185
Have about 30 fines to my name just from Germany. But they don't enforce them, so I shan't be paying them.
>>
its time for me to do what i got to do
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>he posts in the virgin general
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>>77685238
No, I usually think the opposite.
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>>77685244
>Pajeet wearing an Arsenal shirt

Checks out
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>>77685185
just because you can't get them on your train doesn't mean you can't get them on any trains from the conductor you absolute spacker. nice try though LOL

http://www.nationalrail.co.uk/times_fares/ticket_types.aspx
>>
hoaching for a fat jobby
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>>77685185
That's bollocks, not every station has a ticket machine you southern runt
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kill a yank 2017
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>>77685294
Greatest ally
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>chow mein man put too many onions and not enough noodles
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>>77685272
>no ticket machine

extremely rare, I'm thinking super rural stations that have 100 people a year max
>>
interpol finally got thailad
>>
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dinner
>>
off a pill in a daydream
when they see the shine then they changing
>>
>walking to station platform
>worker standing at the bottom of the stairs
>flash him my expired pass from 3 months ago
>"you good go ahead"
aha
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the so called reading stack for the next 12 months
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>>77685238
I've found myself observing normals and you can just tell that most people are just essentially NPCs
they're not "on" so to speak
they just sit there babbling on about meaningless shite
they're not meant to have any substance to them, they're just set dressing for the real people like myself
>>
rape a yank
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>>77685305
beansprouts are by far the worst for this when u crunching on that shit more often than noodles my god never going back to u again
>>
>>77685344
quintessentially swedish post
>>
love yanks
>>
>you cannot get your ticket off the inspector anymore, its not 1960

You can up north. I went to uni in the midlands, was like going back in time 5-10 years.

Then once I took a train up further north. Suddenly I was on this rickety old shit train with no soundproofing and hydraulic doors like the Paris metro.

Then a man with a clunky metal ticket machine from the 1970s came walking down the aisle with a real thick accent and people starting paying him with coins like he was a bus conductor. They all rattled into his machine and he punched some buttons.

Northern monkeys are fuckin weird, it's like the 1970s up there.

Maggie fucked them so hard they entered temporal stasis lmao.
>>
Remembering the time some absolute malnourished little runt of a chav got caught on a train I was on with no ticket and the inspector made him pay out the arse on the spot for a fine/new ticket or whatever, it was like £20 too for a journey that cost everyone else a fiver

was quite enjoyable, love seeing runts get crushed
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>>77685314
bottom bit looks like mould
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>>77685345
and you do have substance, eh?
>>
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>It's been more than a year and Tim is still talking about "Don't mess with me sunshine"
>>
>>77685369
great post
>>
>>77685307
you can buy a ticket from the conductor on east mids trains, cross country trains and northern trains from sheffield to nottingham

reckon you've had very limited train experience
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>>77685344
read 13 reasons why
>>
>>77685373
>. Suddenly I was on this rickety old shit train with no soundproofing and hydraulic doors like the Paris metro.
was it one of these?
>>
>>77685345
you're such a pessimistic depressive and you seem like you're surrounded by pessimistic depressives

most people enjoy work. gives them something to do. thinkers like you or me are like 5% of the population
>>
is it possible to be a good artist and not hate living?
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>>77685373
Fantastic post
>>
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>tfw you check snapchat and see your mates went out without you
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they killed are charlie
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>>77685421
Picasso
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>>77685421
Iron & Wine
>>
funny innit that women are so obsessed with clothes yet 90% of them dress like absolute shit

really makes you think
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>>77685443
f
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>>77685443
glad that idiotic little saga is over
>>
>tfw dress like a middle class twat and use my posher accent so I can squirm out of fines despite there being a machine at the station

get fucked
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>>77685345
and you sit there in silence until someone talks to you presumably
>>
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UPDATED OFFICIAL /BRIT/ PARLIAMENT AS OF 28TH JULY 2017
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My band's new song, check it out lads.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jVZQgik-0jg
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>>77685373
I took a train from Liverpool to Manchester a couple of months ago and it was exactly the same. Couldn't believe the train I had to take, it was ancient
>>
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trump is saving the white race
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>>77685480
Gagging
>>
The first person to receive the tapes was Justin. They kissed once, after she developed a crush on him. However, Justin told his friends that they did more than just kiss, which earned Hannah the reputation of a slut at school.

The second person to receive them was Alex. Alex violated their friendship when he published a "hot or not" list comparing the girls in their class. He awarded Hannah the title of Best Ass, which only reinforced her reputation as a slut. He also awarded his ex-girlfriend Jessica the title of Worst Ass, in revenge for her breaking up with him.

The third person was Jessica. After being compared to Hannah on the "hot or not" list, Jessica slapped Hannah and ended their friendship.
hmm
>>
>Charlie Gard, the baby at the centre of a legal row over his treatment, has died, a family spokesman has confirmed.

IT'S FINALLY FUCKING OVER!! ALLAHU ACKBAR!!

>Timeline of Charlie's case
3 March 2017: Mr Justice Francis starts to analyse the case at a hearing in the family division of the High Court in London

11 April: He says doctors can stop providing life-support treatment

3 May: Charlie's parents ask Court of Appeal judges to consider the case

23 May: Three Court of Appeal judges analyse the case

25 May: The Court of Appeal judges dismiss the couple's appeal

8 June: Charlie's parents lose their fight in the Supreme Court

20 June: Judges in the European Court of Human Rights start to analyse the case, after lawyers representing Charlie's parents make written submissions

27 June: Judges in the European Court of Human Rights refuse to intervene

3 July: The Pope and US President Donald Trump offer to intervene

4 July: The Vatican's children's hospital in Rome offers to take in Charlie

7 July: Great Ormond Street Hospital applies for a fresh hearing at the High Court

10 July: Charlie's parents return to the High Court and ask Mr Justice Francis to carry out a fresh analysis of the case. Mr Justice Francis says he will consider any new evidence.

17 July: Dr Michio Hirano, the US neurologist, travels to London to examine Charlie

21 July: Lawyer representing Great Ormond Street says Charlie's new scan makes for "sad reading"

22 July: Great Ormond Street says doctors and nurses have been subjected to abuse and received threatening messages

24 July: Charlie's parents say they will end their legal fight for his treatment and let him die

26 July: Deadline set for Charlie's parents and Great Ormond Street Hospital to agree how and when he will die

27 July: Mr Justice Francis rules Charlie will be moved to a hospice and have his life support withdrawn "soon after" after an agreement to decide his end-of-life care was not reached
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>>77685438
tfw dont have snapchat but next time u see "the lads" thy are chatting about all this shit taht went down recentl and u werent invited to
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>>77685443
the sunderland cancer kid was better desu
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>>77685314
do you want some pizza with your grease mate
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>>77685502
fuck off murderer
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>>77685314
ah yes, the british cuisine
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>>77685480
>lefties not even the main opposition any more

howling
>>
I had a terrible interaction at work today

A guy was asked a question and didn't known the answer so asked if I did
I replied "do I fuck, have some self-respect, you've been here longer than me"

He did ask me to repeat myself
And then said that I knew stuff

My screw ups
>swearing
>insulting him
>fucking up my response despite fantasising about this situation for months and having a prepared answer (joking about being useless)

Also 2 people quit today
>>
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>>77685519
>>
listening to calvin harris on youtube
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>>77685480
>Radcen now has more seats than Lefty
Excellent
>>
Reminder our train companies are owned by foreign companies and governments who use the profits to invest in railways in THEIR countries leaving us with rickety old dogshit

Reminder because of privatisation, franchises have a monopoly on each part of the country and can charge whatever the fuck they want
>>
>>77685510
He had a black BFF
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>>77685480
whats the ideology of the runt party?
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>>77685558
His early stuff was pretty comfy desu, back when he was a quirky nerdy hipster type guy rather than the EDM chad he's become now.
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Don't engage it.
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switched to listening to zayn on youtube
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footsteps on the dance floor

remind me, baby, of you
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>>77685542
>>77685573
radcen has always been bigger than lefty
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>>77685578
two reminders in one post, you are an angry boy aren't you.
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>>77685587
basically less intense lefties
>>
Whenever I leave London I see people with really shit cars like Fords from 2003. Some even have 90s cars

Didn't know that was still legal
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>>77685546
that's so embarrassingly cute

>Also 2 people quit today
ah yes, call centres
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>>77685598
did you just assume our pronouns?
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>>77685578
really want a nationalised rail service desu
annoys me so much that the only thing remotely close, TfL, throws a massive shitfit every time something its customers want is introduced e.g. night tube
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>>77685587
dunno
think we should add a deano party tbqh
>>
Don't reply to those above your position, worm.
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>>77685612
leftie used to be second biggest party with 22 seats until this new election and now radcen has overtaken them

leftypol can never show their ugly mugs here ever again
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>Only Northerners have shit tr-
>>
>>77685587
i assumed it was people who don't like politics and just want to talk about gameboys and their favourite chippies
>>
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>>77685480
pleased by this development, keep it coming
>>
drinking a bottle of shriaz in bed

hope i die in my sleep
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getting my daily dose of pragerU
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HURRY UP RICHARD
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>>77685648
TfL is fantastic though. London public transport is great. Efficient, modern, streamlined, decent priced.
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>>77685620
Really?

He's a northern lad type
Calls women "birds", watches football, UFC and boxing
>>
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nothing wrong with northern trains

they are 40 years old and still going strong

poncey southern trains brake down every 10 miles
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muh naym uh jef
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>>77685663
All me
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only runts care about politics
>>
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>>77685480
all me
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>>77685692
jew capitalistbergstein
>>
Oxford has no ticket barriers either

Apparently you can go to the ticket office and claim you never got on the train and they'll give you a refund(?)
>>
only politicians care about runts
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLnL-IJPsG8 jazz
>>
when insects talk about trains here i sometimes get involuntary shudders and sadly thats not even an exaggeration
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>>77685710
not being able to talk or not caring about politics in france is social suicide I reckon
>>
why do white people create nice societies that other people want to live in?
>>
>>77685696
>decent priced
you muss be crazy cus
but yeah generally i agree with you, it's better than any other rail service in the UK
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>>77685620
Also the people who quit were like a rank below managers, they were "coaches" been there 6 years
>>
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What'll it be boss?
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>Ticket barriers

What is this meme?
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>>77685762
it's possible they are the master race
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>>77685762
more civilised
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>>77685238
bizarro-solipsist
>>
>>
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peng. love it
>>
>>77685756
no its not
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the lad from dunkirk transitioned
>>
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here's a punk rock band romanticizing construction of railways

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xTcqNvy4xDE

feels very british
>>
>>77685777
Don't open this image
It hurts to look at
>>
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>>77685703
amusingly those trains have never killed anyone
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>>77685790
Must be some southern thing
Can't be trusted to buy tickets
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>>77685777
about -20% on the contrast lad
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>>77685762
superior to other hominid species
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>>77685790
they recently removed the ticket barriers at my station after years of never even using them
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>>77685777
just some chlorine soaked chicken la'
>>
In Norway lads, what do?
>>
>>77685790
funfact: preston train station has put up barriers and now checks tickets on the ramp
so jog on
>>
>>77685870
listen to jazz
>>
>>77685819
cute
>>
>>77685790
Gotta hang there for about an hour on my way to court
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>>77685885
UP THE LAMBS
>>
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>the spic shitskin yank who browses /brit/ blocked me on twitter
howling what a fucking cretin
>>
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>>77685777
>Head down the local paki store
>Selling branston beans individually for 69p each
>Examine a tin to check for dents

>"Multipack. NOT TO BE SOLD SEPARATELY"

He don't give a fuuuuuck son
>>
>>77685777

am genuinely disgusted when i see some working class filth spending their benefits on scratchcards
>>
if you went out into the street and start shouting allhu akbar (one of the most used phrases in islam) would people run away from you or come and talk to you and shake your hand?
>>
>>77685885
They manually check tickets at peak times, but that's not a ticket barrier.
>>
new skirt lads
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>>77685929
the puerto rican?
>>
NEEEEEEED MEEEEEEMEEEEEEES
>>
>>77685956
show face
>>
>>77685813
Terrible pit game.
>>
the virgin music: rock
the chad symphony: free jazz
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>>77685936
Don't think people would take a small, blonde bloke seriously if he did that
>>
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>>77685970
saw this one on facebook
>>
>>77685965
nah, go on his twitter
he's a latin american living in USA and 100000000% posts here, i'd assume mexico
>>
>some terminally ill baby dying is the MAIN news article of the day
I didnt care to start with and I care even less now
FUCK off bbc news
>>
going to the footy tomorrow
>>
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>>77686028
what match
>>
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okay some of these comments are mildly amusing
>>
>>77685936
if you did it mummy would order you back inside with zero gbp.
>>
>>77685443
the parents got what they wanted

rich as fuck
>>
>>77686015
Ayy lmao why dis nigga got 270 selfies
>>
Some areas across the country have a compulsory train ticket thing so if you get caught with no ticket you cannot buy it at all

Not all train companies offer tickets on trains either

Needless to say kindness gets you far and bossman will even let you off if you're near London
>>
if you went out into the street and start shouting free jazz (the best music genre) would people run away from you or come and talk to you and shake your hand?
>>
>>77686045
repugnant creatures
>>
>>77686050
doxxable info
>>
>>77686045
verminous little cretins
>>
WHY DO ALL BRITISH GIRLS LOOK THE SAME REEEEEEEE
>>
>>77686009
It's literally the opposite though.
>>
>>77685950
yes it is now dont reply to me again.
>>
>>77685929
>professional coward, flat earther, proud Latino for the scholarships
https://twitter.com/nokeys101/status/889734150130937857
>Alan you're thick as fuck, you got me wanting to risk it all
he definitely posts here, yanks do not use the term 'thick as fuck'
>>
>>77685777
went to tesco on acid once and it was basically like this
>>
>>77686109
THEY FUCKING DON'T
>>
>>77686110
you're a rock aficionado and you also happen to be a neet
proves me right simple as
>>
>>77686050
rather not say
but in the north
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_7RmheFRz0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_7RmheFRz0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_7RmheFRz0
>>
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*blocks your path*
>>
>>77686109

erm we're a nation of immigrants so they don't x
>>
>>77686045
one on the right looks like a neanderthal
>>
>>77686149
hate this nigger
>>
>>77686149
Shan't
>>
>>77686140
Wait...you really think Chads listen to Free Jazz?
>>
>>77686176
racist
>>
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need you out of business
>>
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>>77686163
>x
>>
>>77686156
*chins him*
>>
>>77686210
not racist just hate niggers simple as
>>
>>77686191
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I5-MAiVjs9g
>he doesn't know
>>
>boss offers me an extra £2,000 a year to move to the london office
>the price of a flatshare in a shitty location is the same as a 3 bed house here

the absolute fucking STATE of london
>>
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>tfw some chubby Canadian liberals accidentally unleashed their obscure psychology professor into the intellectual world
>>
going to watch lotr 2 tonight
>>
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>>77686109
nah doe
>>
>>77686264
it's the chin
>>
I'VE GOT ANOTHER CONFESSION TO MAKE
>>
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>>77686149
>Miss your flight princess? Nobody's bullying you, you stupid FUCK! Jamie, pull up that video of chimps smoking marijuana and driving scissor lifts at the airport.
>>
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>>77686264
>slapping sara in the middle of all those qts
>>
mum put her hands on my neck again do I heem her of leave this fucking shithole?
>>
just matched with a literal 8.5 on tinder
>>
>>77686308
DEFOO her
>>
>>77686264
>fucking rose leslie

Might as well put Maisie and Sophie in.
>>
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>>77686307
off yourself
>>
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>>
>>77686308
have sex with her
>>
>>77686264
>beth
fug. haven't had a wank to beth in ages
>>
>>77686338
accident
>>
>>77686299
Imagine spending all that time making that image when they all look the same
>>
>>77686338
you have to minus 2 points for IRL appearance to account for camera angles and lighting
>>
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my farts are fucking HORRIBLE

each time i squeeze one out i have to run away from it, rank!
>>
>>77686346
is that moon man
>>
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>>77686362
BETH IS NOT FOR SEXUALISING
SHE IS PURE AND LIKES CUDDLES
>>
oh fuck i wanna die
>>
>>77686241
me at 1:36
>>77686307
i think i made it back when she didn't have many photos up (and therefore less/no grim ones)
>>77686343
might as well fucking not
>>
Literally never watched an episode of Joe Rogan, Sargon or Akkad, or RLM.

Youtube celebrities are cancer simple as.
>>
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>Be riding the French trains
>For some reason you gotta stamp your ticket on the platform before you get on the train
>If not the world will literally stop
>Even though my ticket is valid at this time only and I can't reuse it anyway

>Be running late for train
>Forget to compostez my ticket
>Ah shit the conductor noticed

>Pretend to be ignorant foreigner who no speak the French
>"I'm sorry? Excuse me?"

>He notices the French language magazine on the seat next to me
>"Oh, you don't speak French but you are reading French magazine?"
>mfw
>mfw I have no face
>mfw €20 fine
>>
>>77686411
post fucking machines
>>
Can you imagine how much better off this country would be without tabloid culture?
>>
THIS was LITERALLY in the leftypol discord screenshot
Someone post it

>>77686411
>Youtube celebrities
>>
>>77686411
stupid kike
>>
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>>77686346
>>
Can you imagine how much better off this country would be without /brit/ culture?
>>
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>>
>>77686045
Peng af
>>
anyone watching the proms?
>>
Can you imagine how much better off this country would be without pakis and lefties?
>>
i spent half an hour at walmart looking for 3 things: drain cleaner, windshield repair resin, and cockroach killer. they had none of the above. how fucking ridiculous is that?
>>
can you imagine how much better off my arsehole would be with a 8" willy in it?
>>
LITERALLY FROM leftypol discord someone post the fucking screnshot>>77686411
>>
>>77686447
I thought beyonce was black
>>
watching epic political youtubers......./brit/ is like the caliphate for shit taste
>>
listening to melancholy music
not depressed, just find it relaxing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyBId-lCLfA
>>
>>77686388
love these memes
>>
>>77686466
Could've just asked a worker you spaz.
>>
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>>77686396
>>
>>77686466
go to home depot
>>
ahhh yes, love being in york when the races are on so every deano in the country and his bird can dress up in ted baker suits and get absolutely wasted beyond belief
>>
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gf got some new leggings
>>
>>77686448
how many qts are there in ethiopia?
>>
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>>
>>77686513
I remember that hellscape

Hang tough anon
>>
>>
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'ra
>>
>>77686522
Not many. They're overrated by other blacks who hate their noses
>>
going to drink a pint of shandy (radler) all by myself and there's nothing you can do to stop me!! hahahahahahahah wheeeeee
>>
>>77686552
cultural marxism
>>
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>>77686388
>>
>>77686552
Imagine all of those girls lining up and each delivering a swift, firm kick to my spuds.
>>
>>77686411

underage cunt
>>
>>77686562
i want to lick her feet and pits, drink her piss and eat her hot steamy logs.

anyone else?
>>
>>77686513
lmao
I never know when the races are on because I'm detached from reality but I've been caught up in that mess a few times

missing it tonight because I'm with the gf at home hehe xo
>>
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true geordie is better than any of the poltitical podcasts
>>
Brazilians guys beats Muslims who stole them in London

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CM78gUzO-EQ
>>
got promoted lads

soon all of you will bow to me in my 6 series
>>
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>>77686562
actually grotesque
>>
>>77686552
none of them would shag me so I'm not going to bother rating them
>>
>>77686585
Only underage runts follow internet celebrities.
>>
>>77686552
wish 2nd from left could push her tiny heel into my uretra
>>
>>77686607
Are these the artificial friends I've heard so much about?
>>
>>77686552
1 looks like the kind of girl you could bring home to your parents
2 looks like a horrible bitch
3 looks like a good shag and a decent enough person
4 is bland and boring
5 looks the best shag and could do so often with, but wouldn't be good gf material to bring to the family
6 looks like a le so quirky girl that's quite annoying to be around
7 looks like she's got a nice personality but eats chilli beans and farts all the time
>>
>>77686299
kin ell only saved this image yesterday and already some is reposting it
>>
>>77686562
can really see the haggard scottish wench she's going to rapidly transform into within a few years starting to appear
>>
>>77686614
deano my son
>>
de peaceful erb makes dem kill eachudda
>>
>>77686607
I cant stand this. its a big northern bloke and some weird london vegan. bad mix
>>
>>77686607
Right looks like Steven Slate.
>>
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rosy
>>
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about time
>>
>>77686552
5 > 1 > 4 > 7 > 6 > 2 > 3
>>
don't understand why people get expensive BMW's. All look the same to me, its hard to tell the difference between the cheaper ones and the more expensive ones and they don't look that exciting to begin with
>>
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leftypol discord is a stupid fake news meme i joined it when someone posted a link in /brit/, nothing goes on there its dead
>>
>>77686675
god shes grim
>>
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>>77686675
good post
>>
>>77686687
white genocide
>>
>>77686707
vile
>>
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>london trains have anti-suicide barriers
howling
>>
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>when a leftypol runt starts up
>>
Argonnerwald, um Mitternacht,
Ein Pionier steht auf der Wacht.
Ein Sternlein hoch am Himmel stand
Bringt ihm 'nen Gruß aus fernem Heimatland
>>
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Ah yes very impressive
>>
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I'm part of a government-funded advisory committee tasked with creating an original /brit/-meme.

How about this. 'What time is it lads?' and then you all answer an obviously incorrect times for example 3am.
>>
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>>77686687
>>
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>>77686724
no
>>
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>>
>>77686704
yeah i hoped there could be some debates but literally nothing happens
>>
>>77686699
maybe because they want to have a car that's nice to drive in and don't care what an ignorant runtoid on the pavement doesn't know about their car
>>
game keeps crashing, now I have nothing left to distract me, guess I might as well kill myself
>>
>>77686730
howling
>>
>>77686501
fuck off schlomo
>>77686512
next time
>>
>>77686761
what game x
>>
>>77686629
yeah the podcast definitely gives you that sort of feeling ngl
it's also a great contrast, a working class northerner with a middle class southerner but they bounce off eachother incredibly
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJ72VNla3uM
this is probably my favourite podcast, true geordie used to work as a deep sea diver before he started youtube
>>77686660
i think it works well
lawrence is a bellend but it wouldn't work without him
>>
https://www.liveleak.com/view?i=231_1501208289
>>
>>77686725
its just for safety you mong we have that too
>>
The name's Max, Max Resdefault.
>>
>>77686740
3pm
>>
>>77686756
Thats not the reason people buy expensive cars
>>
>>77686740
you can't just force a meme

you have to let them grow naturally
>>
>>77686777
guild wars 2
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ob2wdW89os
>>
>>77686740
3 minutes past
>>
Post a picture of Rosy pre-uni, when she actually had a nice tight curvy body, then maybe we'll talk
>>
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>>77686754
uh oh
>>
>>77686730
context?
>>
>>77686802
it's the reason my dad bought a nice car - he wants to drive to the continent and back on the reg with it and you can't do that without going mental in a cheap runtbox, and it's certainly the reason why I'd buy one
>>
>>77686872
>>77686872
>>77686872
new
>>
>>77686699
actual virgin post
>>
>>77686777
Deus Ex Human Revolution
Thread posts: 304
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