/brit/

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kelv

What the fuck do you think you're doing?

doing a cry

this girl is literally perfect, everything about her

love the way she says "twatted" and her voice sort of breaks

https://youtu.be/iDJvCFjZ78c

derby?

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anime

Think the bartendress is giving me free drinks

Keep asking how much she wants and she says no problem

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Kyary

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>>74179753
yea y

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sue

>>74179800
Need to sniff her feet

jan
it
or

>budweiser
Come on mate

what is ol' vinay up to these days?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JAw3bJEM5k0

tune

Keep occasionally smelling gas. Doing a wonder.

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>>74179793
>bartendress

>>74179804
cool
could have got in at some point but didnt care much
quite regret it now. seems like the best private tracker for films

>>74179837
Special offer, and nobody complains about the generic taste. 5% as well.

>>74179793
Pics

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>>74179819
all me

>>74179855
sorry lad had beans for lunch

>>74179793
you're gonna get stuck with a fat bill mate
they too this quite often

>>74179855
I keep smelling cigarette smoke even though nobody is smoking nearby

>>74179793
>bartendress

ayy

>>74179793
>you end up getting a fuck ton of drinks under the impression its free
>she hands you a bill
>b-but i thought you said no problem?
>giant black lad comes over and makes you pay $1000 USD

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>>74179818

>>74179743
I'll try if the Chinese bloke's there but there's no way I'm risking getting caught taking a picture of melted face woman.

>>74179793
can't wait till the big beefy bouncers hand you a $5k bill

Landlord is in the vacant flat downstairs. Said he'll fix my shower rail eventually. Hope he doesn't come up and knock, I'm in a right state.

What kind of landlord shows up at 7pm anyway? Supposed to be private hours innit?

>feet
shan't

>>74179951
but isn't that illegal?

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Think I may have just followed through but scared to check

>>74179966
well it's vacant innit

Got a failsafe money making opportunity lads, I bet on whoever is winning football matches in the 80th minute to go on to win them

Got 30 quid right now riding on Union Berlin to beat Sandhausen in the 2. Bundesliga

>>74179782
nah can't stop freaking out about that weird dent on her nose, she's fucking minging t b h

Think one of my teeth might be totally fucked, perhaps avoiding the dentist for a decade was the wrong move

Wafting my farts into the neighbours house

>>74179948
what the rarse mi yout

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>>74180000
NO SHE ISN'T

>>74179996
what odds do you get on that?

>>74179782
also, this show looks completely unfunny

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Remember when people went mental and made Ofcom pull this advert despite her being 18?

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>>74179785

>>74179877
i'd say it's the best if you're already on PTP, and have any kind of interest in that niche
it's also fairly easy to get buffer and the forums are full of dedicated translators/subtitle creators, encoding specialists and other enthusiasts. and there are plenty of guides

>>74179948
ayyy eremenow, me need a beeeeeg batty bad gyal from gullyside jamaaaiiica to wine pon me cock

>>74179996
Lmao you fucking spastic, the odds for doing this are awful and of course it's not guaranteed

>>74179981
Yeah but he knocked once at 10pm. What's that about? He might show up and I'll have to answer looking like a right reprobate.

>>74179979
followed through with what?

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Sometimes dad just comes into me room and starts venting about how the bills are making him ill from stress and how he doesn't know how he's going to pay for water and electricity and what not

I've got about 6 weeks left of this programming course before im finished for good and can start working, should I start working weekends at some crummy place just to help him out with things?

>>74180052
age of consent should be 25

>>74180052
tidy

>>74180044
fuck off

wolves dont concern themselves with the opinion of sheep

>>74180108
Yes, obviously. Also GTFO the house and turn the lights off you spack

>>74179966
what state you in mate? if you're pissed, it's fine. if you're high it depends how high but you're also probably fine.
finding it hard to work out what kind of state can't be quickly fixed by a cold shower and a pint of water.

>>74180016
>not 1945
>not 6 million retweets
could've at least tried la'

>>74180101
A fart

>>74180052
Think its the more the fact that she's a school girl mate.

really want a beer but left my cans in the boot of my car which is still parked in lidl 20km away cause I took the fucking bus home for some ungodly reason

>>74180158
But she's not, she was an adult actress wearing a costume. And it's an advert for bread.

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>>74179819
>which increases earthquakes

>>74180135
I've just turned 18 mate it's not like im about to purchase my own house

>>74180064
>if you're already on PTP
h-haha yeah...

>>74180097
shouldn't he legally give you 24 hours notice before entering your property?

>>74180133
*doesn't take notice of your opinion*

>>74180034
shit ones
>>74180096
what's a better thing to bet on?

>>74179882
Of? The bartendress?

How Long Could Humans Live If All Diseases Were Cured? - "According to a calculation by statistics website Polstats.com the answer is a respectable 8,938 years on average"

*awakens Germanic racial consciousness*

>>74180128
wait, you're telling me you actually find this shit humorous? how old are you?

>>74180052
t. anime nonce

the implication of the uniform tells the viewer she is 16 at a maximum although it's not that lewd anyway

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ytgbzOGi2w

Synthwave. That is all.

>>74180242
utter tripe. shan't be acknowledging these so-called calculations

>>74180242
pretty sure most people die of old age which isn't a disease

>>74180266
suck a fart out my arse

pantaloons round ankles (not wanking)

>>74180307
>old age which isn't a disease

>a particular quality or disposition regarded as adversely affecting a person or group of people.

Debatable. And I assume they're also including everything disease-adjacent, and old age mortality is a syndrome

>>74180207
they recruit from thepiratesociety
you just need to make a few hundred posts (and 100 or so good ones)
failing that tehconnection isn't bad

>>74180307
you don't die of old age
you eventually get to a point where you're too weak and even the common cold can finish you off

>>74180296
shit

>>74180242
we'd literally have to implement a mandatory suicide law upon reaching a certain age like in that one TNG episode, rendering pretty much all medical breakthroughs in history as pointless

>>74180146
Shower's knackered, hence he's all about fixing my shower rail. Just had a few drinks and got in me PJs and robe for comfort. Haven't bathed today though so balls are a bit smelly.

I'm probably just paranoid because I got kicked out of about 8 flats in as many years, because of degenerate party boy mates that I've since cut out of my life.

10% stout beers for only 2 quid noice

>>74180356
waiting for inspiration to strike?

>>74180162
>lidl 20km away
The state of Ireland.

>>74180162
What?

>>74180385
untrue. your organs shut down. isn't a disease though.

>>74180353
hope your early teen years are treating you well mate, but you do know that under 18s shouldn't be browsing this site?

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me on the right (i'm a vowed pacifist)

>>74180425
nah i just like resting my hand on my bollocks so it makes more sense to keep trousers pulled down

>>74180452
aha banter mate, love it, top stuff

"WAKUTEKA Take a chance"
Morning Musume

what bus even goes 20km

>>74180478
Saw a lad with one of those purses today

Don't think he realised how gay he looked

>>74180374
hmmm might look into that
ta mate

>>74180403
yeah, you're fine pal. haha my mistake but same goes for a quick rinse of the face in the sink.
it's a friday night as well, quite normal for you to be having a couple cans and relaxing

>>74180478
what's the duck tape supposed too achieve

>>74180211
If he knocks I'm not gonna ignore him. He's practically a mate. Just a bit embarrassing when your testes are this rank in front of the landlord.

need something to do to lift my spirits lads, had a horrendous day

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https://soundcloud.com/spookybizzle/spooky-bassline-baby

Saw an individual can of Guinness for sale for one Euro forty nine cents in the Getränkemarkt today. Nearly pissed myself laughing. *Translator's Note: Getränkemarkt means Drinks Market*

>>74179782
actually did a howl tbf

>>74180423
noticed beer seemed really strong when i was in france

>>74180535
just give your balls a quick rinse in the basin

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nise spot

just bummed a lad

how does it feel that 200 years from now, nobody will remember you exist

>>74180217
I bet on football for fun because it's better to watch with
If you think there's ANY scheme you can use for guaranteed profit you're incredibly naive

The only way to beat the bookies is
>sign up offers matched betting but you can only do this once
>accidental mispricing from bookmaker, usually closed quickly
>expert knowledge on a niche market

goodnight lads

>>74179881
You're giving them away to your mates? Top lad

>>74180581
Reassuring. Nobody will be around to recall my embarrassing social mistakes.

>>74180553
beer is disgusting

>>74180581
better do something memorable then

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>>74180581

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>>74180478

>That lad with a fucking Billhook

>>74180557
yeah reckon it would be a pretty good place to be a wino

can't you get strong af cheap beer in germany?

>>74180585
and spread betting on teams who are winning late on in the game to go on and win at full time

>>74180624
you legit fucking stole that jpg from me

>>74180616
Agree. Woman in front of me was buying twenty three bottles of Ouzo. She had the right idea.

beer is actually disgusting, it's like vile homelesstramp piss

You fuck off mate!!

>>74180649
don't care

>>74180108
That would be a good thing for you to do.

I'm buying a house for my mum because she's rented for her whole life and has no savings. Well, she had savings, but she lent them to me to make investments. Fortunately all of the investments came in. She trusts anything I say and supported me through my depression to where I am now. So I think she deserves it.

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>beer is actually disgusting, it's like vile homelesstramp piss

>>74180556
good lad

>>74180666
its alright

just smoked and i feel sick and my hand stinks
don't know why i do it desu, it's not fun at all is it

>>74180666
>>74180687
Pint at the pub mate!

>>74180640
yes but not good beer just hobo piss like special brew

the stuff i saw in france seemed to be 6%+ by default

>>74180478
me in the background just chucking full rubbish bags out the window into my front yard

run out of baccy, haven't had a smoke for 2 hours i'm fucking steamin

hate beer

love cider

british man i am

>>74180717
vocaroo of you saying this

>>74180645
Wrong
My mate used to do that and lost 300 odd quid on a bet only due to land him £10 profit

Ah yes the ol' cider posting

>>74180749
fairy

>mongs trying to make money off betting
>not just putting some money in Ethereum right now
ah yes, the runts

>>74180733
>yard

foy

>>74180686
Mind if I ask how old are you?

>>74180135
>the lights
yeah of all things, this is probably the biggest drain

>>74180749
Fruit

'gger who i talked to about cleaning my yard asked for 350

shan't

hate beer, hate cider, hate spirits
not a muslim, just don't like them
simple as

>>74180817
BIT raycis

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>tfw you've taken all the redpills

>>74180296
https://youtu.be/I2QF9p5zfoM

>>74180828
Agree. Definitely a vino man myself

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>say alri to a mate when walking past him
>says alri back
>girl he's with laughs once they've passed me
never understood women

going to have to go akimbo gunfingers for this one

https://soundcloud.com/spookybizzle/mosca-bax-spooky-refix

>>74180856
v. g. post

>>74180790
literal pyramid scheme

the bf of my qt coworker dropped by the office today

manlet runt
feel like i could easily steal her away

>>74180874
>he has the virgin accent

>>74180686
25 now

>>74180790
are you the lad who made 1k off ethereum yesterday

>>74180908
how tall

>>74180895
not even slightly true
keep thinking that while i make money though mate x

>>74180874
If you don't have female friends, you might be "that guy"

But then again, I'm sat alone in a lounge full of happy, laughing groups of friends

>>74180929
round 5'6

>>74180799
>>74180925
Oh dear oh dear

>>74180784
>>74180811
Anti cider lads can fuck off

West country is best country

>>74180845
do 'ggers discriminate against each other based on ethnicity?

i've heard east africans vs west africans is a thing

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>>74180874
>driving away from work after the shift ends
>see my co-worker and her boyfriend drive up right by me
>he looks in, waves, and drives away
>co-worker giggling the whole time and hiding her face

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*enters the thread*

alri lads tgif haha

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would like her to cast reducto on my dirigible plums

>>74180927
nah, made 200 off it over the past week. Stupidly i sold some yesterday cos i thought the growth was done but i bought back in

why are redditors obsessed with the issue of vaccinations

>some spastic that tries to talk to me all the time says alri when I'm out with the gf
>say alri back to be polite and then speed up so I don't have to spend any time with him
>do the wanker hand motion to my gf
>she thinks it's fucking hilarious

>>74180989
It's a thing within countries as well.

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>tfw only friends with 6ft+ people

>>74181013
how much do you currently own

>>74181016
autism

>>74181016
why are you obsessed with putting willies in your bum

>>74181016
cuz they stupid man

they STUPID

>>74181020
great post

>>74180927
Nah that's me

Portfolio's at just over £7k now

Wish I could have bought more to start with.

With all the announcements this month I fully expect my portfolio to be worth over 10k by the end of the month

>>74181044
80 ETH atm
When it was around $0.50 per coin i bought loads of them then sold at $1.20 per coin, thinking i'd made a killing
angry at myself for that, looking back on it

good mates with some of the girls at work desu, don't even really want to shag them even though they're fit, just enjoy having a laugh and a bitch with them

x

>>74181113
don't mess with me sunshine

>>74181040
same 'ere la'

need good looking squad for the womyn

>>74181101
what else you in at the moment la? do you buy the LTC segwit hype? personally I think the ltc market already reflects it and it'll probably peak soonish but it does seem to still be going up

>>74181113
didnt happen

need a good arse licking

>>74181101
>>74181118
literally everyone who's dealt with cryptocurrency talks about how they sold early and how they regret it

fucking hold onto it then

that was an utter fabrication

>>74181113
he's actually quite good looking as well

shame

>>74181170
tbf i made a decent ammount by selling slightly early on POSW coin, which is now crashing
you should hedge your bets with some of them

just fabricated a poo

just fabricated a carpet

>>74181040
>tfw only 180cm

>>74181113
this is such a nasty headline. We're supposed to think "haha good" but someone's child did die
if he just got his nose broken or something then it'd be funny

just fabricated a Reich

tried to fart
but it was a shart
went to the mart
to do my part

just fabricated some fabric

>>74181157
Literally just ETH atm. I've got too much other stuff going on so can't keep up with the news regarding too many coins. I was in BTC before but swapped for ETH before the ETF decision. At this point, for long term holds, I wouldn't want to be in anything other than ETH and maybe XRP (Although I'm sceptical about exactly how XRP itself will be used). If I could buy shares in Ripple Labs I would.

just fabricated a gf

>>74181276
we must heal the class divide

Anyone else here sniff coke and that

going on a second date with the proto gf

just fabricated a gun to shoot myself with

>>74181276
agree honestly. seems like he was a nonce but in the full story they were just exchanging insults. then again, it's the independent, so anything that gets clicks will do just fine.

>>74181339
quite enjoy a line

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Alright time for Mozzers

Wish me ganbatte

>>74181339

Only if a proper lush madam offers it to me

>>74181378
Keep me posted

>>74181339
No it's a waste of money when md exists

hahah love cock

i mean coke ahaha

>>74180478
hahaha why don't they just get guns if they want to look scary

>>74181339
speed and 2cb is the god combo

>>74180294
Bottom right? British Infantry and a Universal Carrier (or "Bren Carrier"), they're models waiting to be constructed and painted for the tabletop wargame Bolt Action. My mate has a German army.

did the canadian's job interview go ok

Lots of pretty girls here. Even some blondes for you rorkes.

Too bad I'm autistic haha

>>74181459
>My mate has a German army.

Tell him to give it back we were wondering where it went.

>>74181452
>literally methamphetamine and some dodgy RC fabricated in a chinese lab
>"the god combo"
utter runtoid

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the 'fu has another vid out

>>74181040
just had the thought but damn that thing must be fucking massive to him what the fuck

>>74181464
she asked to roleplay and she gave the situation that she is calling because her credit card was declined and she'd bought a bunch of pizza

got choked up because i didn't know what to do in that situation since i don't know company policy

>>74181378
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PbyR_2jx2ZA

>>74181482
Blondes in Ethiopia hmm yeah alright mate

>>74181404
hello Deano

>>74180530
maintains the structural integrity of a wooden bat if you're using it to batter a runt

post chunz
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1VFuHj9_Tgw

>>74181492
these are merely tags attached to psychoactive chemicals

try it sometime

me and the gf

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YIm6FqiHTZs

>>74181276
who cares, eat the rich

>>74181538
would let blondie find me tbf

>>74181519
was she qt

*farts the impossible fart*

>>74181579
she was a short fat black woman which was actually nice because the ol' 'tism would've kicked in if she was qt

>>74181492
because so many people have died taking 2cb

>>74181577
you mean debbie? or would you prefer the rest are present too

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>who cares, eat the rich

>>74181534
Is that right? I would imagine the structural integrity of the runt would fail long before the bat.

vile slug of a creature

>>74181608
Actually grim

>>74181640
Why did you look at me when you said that?

there's a proper cute lad at the gym, saw his arse when he was getting changed in the locker rooms, had to hide in the shower cause I had such a massive raging hard on

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doing a burger lads

do you realise that everyone you know one day will die?

do you realise that we're floating in space?

do you realise that happiness makes you cry?

got an old mate who just started work at a primary school
apparently they still do religious bollocks like taking the children to church, singing hymns etc
fuck is up with that?

>>74181613
yeah just debbie x
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCcjfweuYtI

>>74181677
Ausgezeichneter post

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>>74181679
fine specimen

>>74181710
max chunage

>>74181482
Pics of blondes

feels good being 191cm lads

anyone under 191cm is a proper manlet haha

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>>74181630
Never understood these types of leftist

They clearly look like shit. Like the doctor sparked them on the wrong end when they were born. They're clearly weak minded; they follow communism because they know they don't deserve anything, yet wish they would

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>>74181700
is existentialeaf a new gimmick?

>>74181705
what's wrong with it? all the hymns are about being kind to one another or about jesus being great because he was really nice to everyone
absolutely nothing wrong with CofE schools and you're a runt who needs battering if you disagree

>>74181705
Should be mandatory desu

you all are a bunch of twots

>>74181700
stop posting your tinfoil bollocks here, leaf

>>74181482
Are you there on your own or with the lads?

>>74181768
alri la' calm down just asking

>>74181815
*cools down the heeming arm before putting it into action*
okay... well... it seems i over reacted

absolutely hated hymns and all the gay praying in school, complete waste of time

>>74181519

i would put emphasis on customer satsifaction desu. Be friendly etc. Dont disagree that it can be shitty to be asked something like that when you dont know policy

>>74181836
Loved seeing boys on their knees.

>>74181873
so do I tbqh

>>74181800
On my own. Going to a place called "flirt" now.

>>74181873
*heems you and puts you on your knees*
what was that mate?

>>74181836
loved seeing white people on their knees

You:
>fat
>boring
>virgin
>forgettable
>atheist
>constantly miserable
>poor
>Weak
>watches cartoons all day

Your great great grandfather:
>Slim
>Muscular
>Christian
>not a virgin
>interesting
>built a family
>is a man
>big cock

Really makes me think

>>74181767
>>74181793
lads instead of saying all of your goodbyes, let them know you realise that life goes fast and that it's hard to make the good things last.

seriously, realise that the sun doesnt go down, it's just an illusion caused by the world spinning around

business plan: become priest, brain wash young children into believing their is a man in the sky so when they're older they donate money to the church, use donation money to go on sleazy holidays to Thailand

>>74181902
*unzips your trousers*

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1CshjCPutI2

>>74181909
at least i'm the same race as my great great grandfather
*laughing track*

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burger update: cheese added

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>The storage allows unprecedented properties including 360 TB/disc data capacity, thermal stability up to 1,000°C and virtually unlimited lifetime at room temperature (13.8 billion years at 190°C )
utter madness

>>74181909
nah I'm sure your great great grandfather was as worthless and pathetic as you

>>74181909
hmm yes, how did that happen I wonder, very interesting

getting quite chummy with the old weedman. he's starting to give me good deals on the reg now. mates rates etc. definitely pays to be nice to people lads.

>>74181900
If I came to Ethiopia would you take me out?

I'm SV650 lad I'm 23 and I work an office job in London like a normal guy

>>74181909
woah almost like the 21st century in one part of the world is different than the 19th century on the other side of the planet really churns the old grey matter

>>74181839
was a definite curveball of a question

>>74181963
>barbe
FONT

>>74181909
I only watch cartoons on weekends.

>>74181963
can see pink bits. put the cheese on too early lad.

>>74181977
How many of those would you need to backup the entire internet?

gonna watch re:zero with the ol' fwb tonight, she doesn't know yet tho thinks she's just coming over to have sex

>>74181963
>cheddar
fucked it mate

>>74181909
EXCELLENT post
testosterone levels drop by each generation, the rate of physical degeneration is increasing

>>74182017

Worst is when they do a meme question desu. The 'teach me something' question can be a piss about too

>>74182038
1 would be more than enough for the internet, but the deep web / dark net would require at least 15-20

>>74181961
listened to the whole thing waiting for the gimmick
was VERY disappointed

What do you guys associate religion with? Me? I associate it with kiddy diddlers

>>74182000
Of course. I'm non-judgemental. You can crash at mine.

>>74182035
nah it's fine lad, got a nice char on it first, moved it up top now to let it cook through and get the cheese to melt properly

>>74182038
well i think the web is in the exabyte range
so you could probably store them all in a wardrobe

>>74181909
my great great grandfather married his cousin, actually. Bit of a weird chap he was
luckily he only married her after my great granda was born (to a different woman)

>>74182098
americans and rasheeds

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Dinner decision: Firezza or Papa Johns

Choose quick

>>74181909
>this fat yank wants to suck off my grandad

>>74182105
ah, utilising the old indirect heat. nice one.

https://youtu.be/1GRtCgLiTZI?t=1m57s
Hmm yes very intriguing

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>>74182098
aesthetics

my great-grandad and his mates rebuilt all their houses after the war together.

can't cook

Runts shouldn't be in command of the grill. Leave the grilling to a grillmaster, or just order take out. That cooked burger is fucking atrocious. Pink bits and cheddar. You're hurting the grill

>>74182100
You're a cool guy desu

Are you in Addis Ababa?

>>74181909
my great great grandfather died when he was 4

he was THAT fucking alpha!!

>he knows his ancestry
alri benedict fitzwilliam

>>74182156

i choose a nice Halal steak desu

>>74182209
start simple and work your way up.
when i started uni i could cook shit but now its probably my top hobby. love it.

>>74182240
>could
*couldn't

>>74182215
That's impossible. He couldn't have sired anyone by that age

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>>74182193
gonna get rasheed'd hard for this but islamic art is aesthetic af
generally based around patterns as creating images of humans (or living things or whatever) is forbidden

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What race is this person?

>>74182208
my great grandad made loads of money off building houses after the war
unfortunately his name was fred west though
>>74182217
dunno what point you're trying to prove here
do you never speak to your grandparents or anything?

>>74182209
you've to flick the red switch on the wall over the oven otherwise it won't turn on

>>74181909
My great grandfather abandoned his family with 2 very young daughters in scotland and moved to south africa to be a policeman and then canada to be mounty. then he joined the canadian army and got killed by a german rifle grenade in 1916 aged 36.

I suspect my life will be alot less interesting than his no matter what i do

>>74182286
nah all died before i could give a toss unfortunately

>>74182285
foreign

>>74182098
Christianity. Western Civilisation. Hope.

>>74182285
american

>>74182283
looks like a great place to do drugs

dude im so fucking high right now
thwewss a fog
pressure
lmao

>>74182000
>>74182100
I've been meaning to make a post like this too
/brit/ meetup in Ethiopia?

>>74182285
human race

>>74182285

Trash (American)

>>74182343
lmao

>>74182283
rasheed

>>74181977
It would be really cool if this sort of thing turns out to be in ancient ruins

>>74182385

>>74182385

>>74182385

>>74182317
still dont understand your point

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Shitskin is the hottest

>>74181492
mdma is has the name methamphetamine in it too

this is v trippy

>>74181492
if only you brits had meth, it's all amph sulphate shit

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>>74180581
Death scares the shit out of me, the idea that I'll cease to exist one day and over time everything I love and care about will be lost and forgotten, really sucks. It also makes me wonder about the fate of humanity, our sun will die eventually taking out our entire planet.