>tourist asks for directions >I say I don't know

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>>71987564
>someone needs directions
>"yeah just go that way"
>dont actually know where it is but dont want them to know

>someone asks for directions
>"yeah just go that way"
>don't know where it is but i'm sure as hell i do not want to help some neurotypicals

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>tourist asks for directions
>give them the directions there
>tell them what kind of transport options are available to there
>tell them in intricate detail on what stops to get off at precisely where they want to go on the public transportation
>offer to lead them the way there

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>>71987620
>A few minutes later
>Dame la mochila!

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>amerishartdumbdumb asks for directions
>"no hablo ingles senior"

>>71987564
>tourist asks for directions
>do my best to help them find what they're looking for, make small talk if im not in a rush
why are you people not nice

Just called the police. Thanks for all the evidence I needed.

>brit asks me for directions
>Tell him exactly where to go
>He visibly distrusts me

FUCK YOU POMMY

>>71987749
You absolute maniac!

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>tourists ask for direction
>finish up giving them money so they can arrive safely to their destination
I was going to buy an ice cream /int/

>>71987948
that's beyond beta

certainly very impressive

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>tourist asks for directions
>point him towards the nearest favela

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>>71987784
>Okay pues. ¿Por favor me dices donde está...

Bend over Swedeboi, time for the spicy enchilada.

>>71987564
The heavenly gate will never be opened in front of you.
You will fall into hell.

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>be a mugger
>tourist asks for directions
>tell them i don't know
>i actually knew
>don't mug them to make things even

>>71988050
I thought nips believed in reincarnation and Buddha and shit.

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>>71987564

>tourist asks for directions
>give him directions in exquisite and dynamic detail.
>W-well thanks man.
>No worries m8
>Lift my leg up and turn around
>let loose a crescendo of a fart then run off

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>tourists ask direction
>don't talk but actually use body language and sounds to show directions
>tfw knows english very well
>they nodded and seems to understand and continue their way
>3 days later, local news shows tourists was rescued because they've been lost in the jungle. The reason apparently was misguided by certain unknown local. (No google mapped here)
>mfw everyone says that we're nice

>tourist asks for directions
>tell him where to go and which tram to take
>realize afterwards I sent him the wrong way
>feel bad about it for weeks

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>tourist asks for directions
>I-I don't know, s-sorry sir...

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>>71987564
>blind person asks where the bus is heading
>tell him I can't see

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>ask for directions
>get shot

>>71987564
that's a very common shit to do in my place as well

>>71990495
because no one here speaks english good enough to explain how to get to the place they're looking for

>tourist ask for directions
>i get nervous and tell them the best I can
>feel bad afterwards because I wasn't as precise as I could be

>>71990577
I mean it works for domestic tourists as well

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>tourist asks for direction
>tell him turn left, then walk 200 m, then turn right...
>for 10 minutes

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>tourist asks for directions
>keep walking and pick up the pace

>see tourist
>stare at them

>confused tourist asks for directions
>I literally made the map they're holding
>still send them in the wrong direction

>>71987564
>tourist asks for directions
>I lead them to my sex dungeon for cuddles :3

> Tourist asks for directions
> Open my phone and explain in simple terms how to arrive at their destination.

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>>71987948
Cute :3

Literally not a single situation posted in this thread happened.

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>tourist asks for directions
>take my phone out and give him truthful and accurate directions
>he thanks me and tells me to have good day
>I don't

>>71990914
The eternal ChileANO

>>71987564
>not a French flag
impressive

>>71990894
i actually did this >>71987620 two times, one with a french couple and the other with a german or austrian family

>>71987564
actually did this to some couple who I think was from South America lol

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>>71988270
Fuck you I laughed

>tourist asks me for directions
>fart and sneeze at the same time, defying impossible odds
>tourist applauds me and starts walking in circles

I hope he found what he was looking for

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>tourist asks me for directions when I'm in a different country
>I give them the correct directions
>in english

>local asks me for directions while I'm touring
>give them the wrong directions in their dialect fluently

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>person asks for change
>tell him i have none
>actually have loads

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>tourist asks me for directions
>get nervous and start talking like a retard and saying wrong directions
>tourist corrects my directions and goes away

>>71991626
how can a xeno into cigars?

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>sunburn myself in Thailand
>waiting at train station
>Thai guy walks up to me with a towelette he bought from a vendor and gives it to me
>shocked by his niceness

Next time I see a lost tourist when I'm around D.C. I'll pay it forward.

Unless they're Chinese

>>71987871
That's what you get for being a French cunt.

>>71991850
Because that xeno is a goddamn robot!

>Tourist asks for direction to hostel
>I'm drunk like a mofo
>can't figure out where I'm on a map or where should I tell him to go
>spent 30mins explaining him
>hostel was 100m away, I could literally see it

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>be me
>be tourist
>visit finland
>be confused where to go, smartphone says everything wrong with directions and places
>a short young guy comes forward to me and says "help?"
>I respond with "yes please, help me find this"
>show him on the phone
>he responds with broken english
>he sees that I don't understand and we both laugh awkwardly
>i try my best remembering all those stupid finnish sentences I learned
>tell him with very slow and broken finnish help me find this place and if he can tell me in finnish slowly
>he laughs and say
>"Jag kan svenska, vill du ha hjälp?"

NEVER BEEN SO FUCKING RED OF SHAME, FUCKING MADE ME LOOK LIKE A FOOL TRYING MY BEST SAYING FINNISH WORDS AND THIS GUY JUST HAPPENED TO KNOW SWEDISH, FUCKING ANGRY WILL NEVER FORGET THIS.

Americans are actually weirdly good when asked for directions. I remember asking for directions a few times when I was there and they will literally stop doing what they're doing to draw you a map of the area with highly detailed instructions and landmarks to look out for

Anytime I've asked for directions in Europe I ended up more lost

>tourist asks me for direction
>oh wait there are no tourist
such is life in vukojebina

>>71994604
Even in Saraevo? Maybe Kusturica fans?

>>71994628
I am not from Sarajevo. I am from small Krajina town rated the 5 most popular tourist destination in Bosnia but it's all lie from West.

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>>71987564
>local tourist ask for direction
>I'm foreign tourist

>>71990748
how are all the brown ones working out?

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>tourist asks for directions
>make seagull screams while waving my arms
>they go away

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>Russian man asks me if he can swim in the ocean near the docks even though there is a Manta Ray in the water
>Told him it was okay, and that it isn't deadly and not to worry about it
>Asked my dad later and he said they were extremely dangerous
>MFW i killed a Russian man because i forgot the fate of Steve Irwin

Hope he at least enjoyed the water

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>arab tourist ask for directions
>tell him that I have autism and my brain isn't developed enough to know the directions
>actually have aspergers
He got trickeded

>tourist asks for directions
>explain that I am in a hurry to get home because I shat my pants a little bit
>they understand and tell me they have shat their pants in the past too

>>71987564
>Sure, just walk right through the middle of that favela and then turn right. Can't miss it.

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>>71987564
>tourist asks for directions
>i do my best to help them

>tourist asks for directions
>five minutes later he's giving me directions into his anus

>>71987564
>tourist asks for directions
>I say I don't know
>I actually knew
>my country is a shithole and will remain so
for as long as it's populated by "people" like me
Completed that for you

>>71988251
underrated

>>71994554
depends where you are, outside of big cities basically everywhere in the world, people will go out of their way to help you. try getting someone to give you directions, even very basic ones, in New York for example.

>>71996943
>tfw you'll never go to israel and be directed by a friendly local

>tourists asks me the direction
>ignore him
>he follows me and continue to asking for direction
>all the way to my house, to my room
>I am now posting with a tourist asking me for direction

>>71987564
>see tourist
>stare at them until they feel uncomfortable and go away

>>71987564

>tourist asks for directions
>point them in one direction
>when i get home i realise i've fucking sent them in the wrong direction by accident because i'm retarded
>feel bad

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>>71990914

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>tourist asks for directions
>I say 'aha me no english'
>remember im british(white)

>>71994604
Sirotiljo, Herzegovina masterrace

>>71987564
>I-I don't live here

>>71987749
>>71987815
Why you two so very nice?

>tourist asks for directions in english
>this is japan thus speak japanese you filty gaijin

>>71999001
koneecheewaa m8, 'Meido kafe' wa dokodesoo ka?

>tourist ask for direction in poor korean
>reply in korean
>they don't understand
>have to say it all over again in english

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>be tourist
>ask for directions
>kind passer-by gives me simple and concise instructions, showing me the route in a map in his cellphone
>say i inderstand (i don't) and go my way to not be a nuisance
>get lost anyway
>call a taxi eventually when i am already about to cry
This must be some sort of disease, no matter how carefully and simply they explain to me i just can't get it

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>>71987564
>tourist asks something
>pretend that you didn't hear and just keep walking
>there's no way you could've missed the question, so you end up being extremely rude
>great shame takes over later
>drink

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>tourist asks for directions
>send them to the black part of town

>>71993304
*tickles u*

>>71999178
>black part of town

wat dis?

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>be tourist
>lost
>"hey are you lost?"
>n-no I know exactly where I'm going
>walk off in random direction

>>71987564
>tourists asks for direction
>direct them to my home
>dinner
>alcohol
>BDSM

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>go to museum in Buenos Aires
>kind of lost
>see people in a colorful bus stop
>ask for directions
>they're tourists
>feel like a fucking retard
>keep walking
>see people in another colorful bus stop
>ask for directions
>they're also tourists
>REEE.jpg
>realize both of the bus stops were for touristic bus tours around the city
>never going back to Buenos Aires

>>71997593
Depending on where you are and what time of day even people in New York will stop and help. I live in DC and I get asked for directions pretty often (if I leave my apartment) and I help people out because I don't have anything better to do or want to be late for work.

I opened the thread because I thought OP was a Frenchman. I didn't realize Brazilians were such pricks, but whatever, your country is too shitty to visit anyway.

>>71999685
Is DC still as shitty as it was in the 90's? When I was there it was very easy for a naive Canadian teenager to accidentally wander into a nigger war zone, but I've heard that the city has been somewhat cleaned up since then.

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>>71987564
>tourist asks for directions
>try to be helpful
>after like 10 minutes of studying the map, send him to one direction
>after he left I realize I sent him just the opposite direction

>>71999097
are yuo a woman

>>71988090
>tfw knows english very well
You're not fooling anyone, orangmorang.

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>>71987564
>tourist asks for directions
>mumble that I don't speak english
>I actually speak english

>>71999730
I thought Canadians were meant to be friendly!

I pretend not to speak english when american tourists ask for stuff

>>72003491
i will heem you faggot

>>71995371
Assburgers is an autism spectrum disorder though.

>>72003491
>french being pussies
What a shock

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>playing in my front garden as a kid when a car pulls up
>window rolls down and a fat scottish guy asks directions to the village
>purposefully direct him the wrong way
>he says thanks and drives off
>laugh with friends
>mom comes out from inside the house
>'Wow anon! You must feel so lucky!'
>ask why
>'You do know who that was right? Robbie Coltrane!'
>...
>'The guy who plays Hagrid in Harry Potter'

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>>71987564
>american tourists ask for directions
>send them to the nearest commieblock full of maghrebis

devilish

>delivery boys asked for direction
>told them to take a straight then take a left and then ask for directions
>they believed me

>tourist asks for directions to a museum
>give him directions to an Albanian crime den
>"enjoy yourself!"

>tourist asks for direction
>take them to my rapeshed

>>71987595
>>71987620
This happens to me all the time. Brazilians love to do this.

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>tourist asks for the way
>show him the way
>he gives me 10 Euros

>>71987564
>be on holiday in Croatia with parents
>nice place and nice people, can recommend
>need to leave earlier than my parents
>need to go to Ljubljana somehow, already have bus ticket from there
>ask a local how to get there
>I DON'T KNOW I NEVER GO TO LJUBLJANA EVER, NEVER WILL
That was the day that I learnt Croats and Slovenes don't like each other. He was a nice guy though.

Few years later
>be in Italy with friends
>repeatedly get lost
>one girl always approaches locals asking them for the way
>always talks to them in German
>"why are they always giving me wrong directions"
>she's not getting it
>have to follow her always
>always getting lost
>ask locals for the way myself
>"parla tedesco o inglese?"
>always give me the right way (even get a map and show me)
>"why are they giving you the right way and not me?"
it's almost like showing a little symbolic respect can help

>>71999339
A lot of towns have this
In my city it's the west side, it's seriously like an entirely different world over there

>>71999522
that's like me going to new york and asking directions, not weird at all

>>72004144
holy shit
Well I mean actually though it doesn't make a difference if he's famous really does it you were an ass either way

>tourist asks for directions
>give him wrong directions
>I acually knew

fucking kek, fuck smelly tourists

>>72000165
Knows english =/= master in the skills

>>71987815
>>71987749
>>71990674
>>71990839
This

>>71990674
This

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>>71987564
>going outside

>>71987564
>Live in Indiana
>No tourists
>Never have to give directions
Why are other people so cucked?

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>This thread
I'm going to make sure to never ask for directions in a foreign country ever

>Tourist asks me for directions
>It's to get where I am going
>Don't want to have to walk the whole way with him so send him in the wrong direction
>Spend the whole day on the lookout for him so I can hide if he shows up.

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>I ask someone for directions
>I actually know exactly where I'm going
>tfw I wasted their time

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>>71987564
>girl tourist asks for directions
>I tell her to get into my taxi
>show her 4000 CZK
>"you won't put it on the internet, yes?"
>"of course not"
>mfw I came where I wanted

>native person asks me for direction
>I'm actually the foreign tourist with no clue

This has happened to me twice already in Montreal and Amsterdam. Maybe I look like I'm easy to approach(I hope it's smart, though).

>Read on some pick up artist channel website that asking random girls for direction increase your confidence
>She says she doesn't know
>Never ask again

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I always do what common courtesy demands of me because I'm a functional member of my society.

>>72014136

Third worlders are pricks, new at 11.

>>71987749
CANNOT FABRICATE

>Tourist asks for directions
>I don't know where that place is
>I say I don't know
>I teach the tourist to use google maps

>am tourist myself
>some tourist asks me for directions
>point them to a big ass map on a bus stop

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>tourist asks for directions
>you don't want to go there, follow me
>bring him to a bar and "buy" 3 rounds
>wait 'til he goes to the toilet and leave telling bartender the tourist is paying

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>tourist asks for direction
>I know where it is and I tell them how to get there
>they are very pleased and thank me for the help
>two minutes later realise I gave them the wrong directions
>mfw

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>sitting on a street bench because I forced myself to go outside and the bars aren't open yet
>brit tourist ask me for directions
>make small talk and walk them there since I'm bored out of my mind
>actually kind of expect to make a friend
>we arrive where the tourist wanted to be
>his wife is here and waiting next to a taxi
>says goodbye, they're heading to the airport
>buy a bottle of gin and go drink alone at home

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>tourist asks for directions
>actually there is no tourist because this country is boring

>>72023737
>drinking pure gin alone
thats when you know you have a problem

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>tourist asks for directions
>"my time to shine"
>english skills suddenly disappear
>can't say shit

>>72013604
imagine living in a state with LITERALLY NOTHING to do

oh wow sorry anon

>>72023737
it's ok anon we're your friends

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>tourist asks directions
>tell them its back down the street they came
>watch them walk all the way down and back up
>watch them divert their gaze as they walk right past me

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>>72024284

>>72024284
Will try this one day

>>72024284
rip marimo

>tourist asks for directions
This never happens to me.

>>72024173
I'd get back to my wife if I were you, cucky. Your wife is probably being gangbanged by tourmonkeys.