/brit/

garage nation

cockhold

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are we in /depression hours/ yet?

she copped me from far

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yo yes
light the bifter
i'm gonna rape your little sister

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no muslims allowed

YA PISS YER PANTS EH? WHERE'S KES?

White people

https://youtu.be/0SrLM8dSB0k

>>68207187
yeah, thinking about killing myself desu

when i'm on the mic we got the vibe yo

>>68207187
Still in rorke vs RASHEED I think, near the end

I'm waiting just like you x

why do a bunch of french cities have rapid transit systems but only london does?

willy lads desu

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hmmmm

>>68207171
ummm sweetie it's called a one line flow
don't think you'll ever understand grime

>>68207258
the north is too shit i think

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Fat lasses lmao

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aaaaaaaaah yes

>>68207258
because our government is retarded

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>>68207272

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hmmmmmm aaah

wish there was non-interracial porn with the same production quality as blacked tbhq lads

>>68207296
no it isnt

the reason is because they are London centric

when i say garage you say nation

garage

going wee

>>68207333
runt

ah yes... banning the burka... very good

>>68207308
fuuuuuuuuuuggggggg

White people

https://youtu.be/RAf0vX0fD2A

waiting for the nightly 2am text sesh with the gf x

>>68207273
how tf is that 8 bar verse a one line flow lmaoooo

>>68207333
garage
i don't care about garage
who told you that i make garage

>>68207360
>trusting a nigger

>>68207365
bit jealous 2bh

>>68207368
rhyming a word with the same word is very common in grime, easy for the crowd to pick up and repeat

everybody knows, serious
from day one i said i was serious
but nobody took me serious
etc. etc.

Some absolute chav came into work today. Started talking about how he and the owner (my dad) go way back. He was clearly lying but to save him embarrassment I had to pretend that I wasn't my dad's son.

Was proper awkward.

>>68207365
ive put my gf in her place and we barely text

cant stand it desu

>>68207422
the thinking mandems lyric

>>68207440
yeah you dont have to pretend, you're your dads wifes son lad

So why did assuming me get such a bad reaction when I said I wasn't going to the christmas do? I got looks of absolute disgust, horror even,

Because they think i'm a loser. How DARE this social retard refuse to join our BIG SUPER IMPORTANT christmas do. he NEEDS us.

it's grossly offensive to them that someone of my low social standing could ever them down. but of course during the event itself nobody will care that i'm not present. playground stuff really/

>>68207422
so now I say BOY BETTER KNOW

>>68207446
elaborate

>>68207440
>Started talking about how he and the owner (my dad) go way back

for what purpose?

>>68207422
still not a one line flow mate, that's three lines

dis likke yute i had to warn

>>68207395
don't worry lad, I'm sure you'll soon have a gf too x

are you ready for the ruff man bass

haa fuu

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>>68207280
>tfw when no thicc brit gf to sit on my face, punch my balls and twist my dick

>>68207475
put the bottle down lad and cry yourself to sleep

>>68207484
i dont like texting people, i find it tedious. therefore ive put my gf in her place and dont respond quickly enough for it to develop into a back and forth

if she wants to talk she can ring me or come over

>>68207440
haha dad's son

>>68207496
one line flow = flow that's only one line repeated
nowt wrong with dans verse on private caller

>>68207475
its more that they didnt quite realise youre such a boring autistic cunt

>>68207340
>i-i-i meant this word instead

What relevance has it anyway? If they've faced discrimination, resentment, hatred, opposition for decades and still come here, it clearly doesn't work, so you trying posit the idea that banning the burqa is workable policy to dissuade Muslims, despite it affecting so few anyway, and hasn't worked in the way you think it does in other nations, is clearly not one you've thought through very well.

I always like to think everyone on /brit/ is also drinking and snorting cocaine on their own as well as me, it makes me feel better

here in London there's a sound called garage

who /directrudeboy/ here

>>68207487
>for what purpose?
because he was just a talkative mong who loved the sound of his own voice

>>68207524

You must have some pretty weak banter.

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Stole some QI episodes off bf's shared files.

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>"Shall we watch a movie dear?"

>>68207582
no i just dont like texting

we banter in person

>>68207597
bit gay

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>>68207511
>tfw no French gf to treat me to home cooked meals every night, having loving hand-holding sex with, and to facefuck

>>68207309
stop watching porn m8

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The artist formerly known as kyazzer

rhythm n gash tbf

listen to nasty crew sets on de ja vu fm from 2002 lads

>tfw I am an obscenely good liar
>It actually kind of scares me how good I am at it because I'm worried I'll start convincing myself of things that never happened
>tfw the one thing I always trip up on with lies is when someone asks me if I've ever had a missus
Do not know why I can't lie on that topic. I crumble.

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>>68207628
how are you mate?

gonna become /brit/'s hypeman i reckon

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>tfw you will never die

>>68207659
state of you 2bh

utter runt

believe me i'm on my p's and q's

>>68207670
everyone did this in america when the bill was worth more than $5

the state of your country

when I say you say we say you say make
some
noise

>>68207555
>What relevance has it anyway? If they've faced discrimination, resentment, hatred, opposition for decades and still come here
Yep, just set up/took over their own neighborhoods and towns. Now people are becoming used to it and with muh diversity it will only get worse

>>68207688
*wheels up your post*

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>>68207622
>tfw a canadian replies to your post

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fucking females is for poofs

i don't smoke cigarettes
i don't smoke cigars
i don't smoke a pipe

>>68207659
Can you believe the word of a self-confessed liar? If he's telling the truth, he's not a liar. If he's a liar then you can't believe him when he says he's a liar.

Paradox 2bh

>>68207726
i do haha (not a pipe)

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>anon. anon. come lick my... *pfffffffffffffffffft*. oh no. oh anon, i... *peeep*. anon, i've shit the bed. again. sorry

(pipe pipe pipe pipe pipe)
I DONT SMOKE DA REEFA

>>68207744
you smoke paul?

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>mfw a frenchman is on /brit/

*gets sworn into office*

What would you serve in a /brit/ thread?

Me?

I'd serve quads

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>>68207663
Top of the world

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*does the virgin walk*

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reminder that jme pioneered the business idea gimmick

gf is being a needy fucking twat lads sick of it

>>68207555
also I said it's a step in the right direction. France not being muslim free doesn't disprove my theory

>>68207782
jme is reddit incarnated

>>68207777
robert!!!

>>68207758
No I don't

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>mfw non-quebecois are on /brit/

>>68207728
I never said I exclusively lie.

i'm on a blackberry hype

>>68207777
nice one mate

>>68207798
give her a smack lad

Reckon there'll ever be another /brit/ meetup?

>>68207741
I hate this gimmick cos that chick is a literal 10 and every time I pull the pudding over her, I can't help but picture this greasy green turd hanging out of her anus when I'm dreambanging her.

Have you ever cat called a girl?

>>68207741
*pulls your pants down*

*laps it up like a dog licking peanut butter*

>>68207850
no

not that much of a runt

>Sunday

hmm no not a fan

>>68207799
There are Muslim countries which have banned the burka. Didn't stop Muslims being Muslims.

Banning the burka is a just a gimmick to throw a bone to the deanos of society.

>>68207799
>France not being muslim free doesn't disprove my theory
It's not a theory. Do you understand what a theory is?

>>68207848
nah, not after what happened at beacons :/

love it when my phone just loses 400mb of space out of nowhere and leaves me with fuck all and popups every time i open it telling me there is no space absolutely love it

smelt a carton of old milk i forgot to rinse out and i puked in my mouth a bit

>>68207840
Thanks mate, I didn't thing I'd get it, and even if I do some faggot usually says I cheated

say a prayer for cheadle

Got some dark chocolate Rolo puddings.

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>>68207884
>work in 32 hours after 2 weeks off

>>68207782
i want to make a $4.20 store that sells marijuana-related products and other cool things that are worth roughly $4.20

wish i was someone lads

>>68207782
Is this so he can justify selling £100 Xbone controllers which say "Boy Better Know" on them?

>>68207741
>>68207849
looks recognisable but can't put a name to the face

>>68207187

Just had a fairly traumatic acid trip, was in floods of tears when i recalled my nan calling my pregnant mother a lazy bitch when i was 7 years old, and my mum burst into tears. I don't remember my dads reaction, which can only indicate it was nonexistent or weak, he was too afraid to stand between his mother and wife, and thus imprinted me at the vulnerable age of 7 as he was then, too beta and weak to control the emotions.

I suppose that shattered my reality as a child because I could never have imagined my mum breaking down like that especially with nobody to back her up. She always seemed strong.

I haven't seen my nan in 12 years. She is now 75. I'm dreading seeing how much she's aged, or am I really dreading HER seeing how much I'VE aged?

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getting monged off my face

>>68207950
you can become the president of my fanfanclubclub

going to fry some eggs in the morning

can already taste them xx

those lads are still at it haha
anyone that thinks banning the burqa is a good policy doesn't deserve even one picosecond of my brain processing power

>>68207892
was actually about to change it to something else but realised I care about nit picking words on 4chan

>>68207958
jme's business gimmick is selling things at a super-inflated price with a limited supply
he sold 100 snapbacks for £120 each
smart lad desu

>>68207949
haha nice one dude

>>68207983
i'll think about it and let you know

>>68207985
you can do something to my eggs if you like x

You are now thinking about that girl from 5th form who had the amazing chebs

>>68207950
all i wanna be all i ever wanna be yeah yeah is somebody to you

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>>68208024
>5th form

>>68207994
should be a don't in there somewhere haha fucked that one up

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-Nd5aWM2Ks choon

>>68208024
americans call them forms too? thought that was just a canadian thing

>>68208024
>5th form
disapproving image

George ford <3

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Rate my crisps and booze.

Render unto Geedorah what is Geedorah's

Ten to one he'll see ya through a glass beaker and tweezers

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>>68207947
>work in 32 hours but I'm only in until Tuesday afternoon this week
>got a team meeting on Tuesday morning so I'm only really working on Monday

>>68208008
err no thanks mate chicken eggs are sufficient

>>68207994
You don't seem to care about logic or reason either.

when did americans start saying ya'll?
thought that was a british thing

>>68208075
ok but i reckon you should sleep with me just to be sure
no homo

>>68208049
>>68208059
BEEP BEEP BEEP

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>>68208024
>5th form
wats dat

>>68208049
>never read a book predating 1980's

yes 5th form you fucking caprisun, year 11. uncultured pig fat

>>68208077
what makes you say that?

>>68208062
>haig club
He fell for the Beckham memes

just set the alarm for 6am to get up for my early sunday shift lads haha kill me

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhNzHEtAxnA

dont want to be a grown up :/

it's a london ting
i do it for my london dons
all the north side and east side dons
all the south side and west side dons

Lads?

>>68208062
8/10

Needs some kettle cooked jalepeno, more stouts, porters, and little less IPA.

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>>68207717
>When a frog disrespects you

>>68208090
alright then

>>68208129
HAHA HE USED THE SAME WORD THREE TIMES XDDDDDD WHAT A SHIT MC HEHE XDD

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made me thingk

>>68208085
Since forever, since y'all brought it over. It's most common in the South though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f8HdqPej-Ps banger

>>68208062
had to look up the haig club as i thought it looked like a shit jager rip off but i guess not

>>68208126
Amazing how many great songs Blink 182 had, granted they all sort of sound the same but they still hold up 20 years (!) later

when did brits start saying lads?
thought that was an american thing

https://youtu.be/MEfLg8e2ts8

SHUT

>>68208135
I had a stout earlier, breddy good. Not Guiness, got it from Marks and Spencer. Can't drink more than one desu. IPA is light but has flavour.

>>68208167
cool

>>68208174
THE RING OF FIRE!!!

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>>68208062
>Magners

>>68208085
ur fucking retarded m8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p8t1jOmk5D4

desu

>>68208209
see you later for sex

why are brits so fucking rude?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OOSTGqtajZA

>>68208185
its a shite meme whiskey

>>68208118
eh it was only £15 in Asda.

>>68208085
>>68208189
high quality postings

>>68208062
Try-hard-trying-to-impress-/brit/ core

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>when you and randy just had a few drinks

drinking a beer

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the art of the alt-right

downing these biere d'ors like mad

>>68208270
i am the liquor

>>68208239
yes indeed, so-called sex

>>68208243
i see that now as i looked it up
looked like jungfrau or something at first clance

>>68208277
why don't they like the queen?

IM TIRED OF WEAK ASS NIGGAS WHINING OVER SHIT THAT DONT BELONG TO THEM
FUCK IS WRONG WITH THEM

>>68208271
you definitely dont know how to swim

>>68208277
what is our Liz doing there?

fucks sakes

lost my shoes haha

>>68207549

I have a reputation as a pisshead who loves a free drink
So for ME of all people to refuse to go makes them deeply insecure

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>>68208163
>when a canadian thinks he's british

Love people are there
The smell of love is everywhere
You think it's always sensitive and good
You think that I want to be understood
I've got a match
Your embrace and my collapse

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have a recurring dream where i'm watching robot wars from the audience. it's the final round, razer vs. hypnodisc, winner goes home with the series trophy. i'm cheering for hypnodisc, he's giving razer a good run around and biting him every so often with the flywheel. suddenly hypnodisc spins out and razer bears down on him. i feel dizzy, the lights in the studio seem to brighten and obscure my vision. i feel the sensation of cold concrete on my back. i open my eyes and there i am, lying on the studio floor, in the place of hypnodisc, razer's pneumatic jaw about to clamp shut on my bollocks. that's when i wake up to cum all over my sheets and tears in my eyes.

>>68208248
It's shit though and you're lining that cunt's pocket too.

Plus, there's a reason why it's that price.

why don't i have a gf lads? i'm an alright bloke i think.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xs3BXVTF7mw

>>68208334
shan't

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>>68208329
But I am, Pierre.

>>68208329
who thinks this?

>>68208163
is this legit?
story

>>68207611

no im about to crash from all the flubromazolam i took

which by the way, was made in someones bath using untested, unregulated chinese chemicals

trusted source on the croydon tram crash inquiry just informed me they've received evidence of 2 relatively small objects being on the track at the time of the crash

getting worried now, i hope they don't ask me to pull down my boxers :/

a lot of heteros in this thread.
can you even IMAGINE being one? haha.

>>68208327
yeah mate it's obviously them who are insecure and not you

>>68208351
maybe your personality still isn't good enough to make up for your looks?

if you have both the personality and the looks you should have a gf

We bust guns from Toronto to UK

My mandems will turn your birthday to doomsday

have not read a single post in this thread

>reading posts

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anyone want to join a call with me and ulster

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>>68208351
you try too hard

let go of all effort and path to gfs will come to you

how do we get the canadians to leave 4chan forever?

>>68208415
well my face isn't great but i'm 6 ft and in shape. my personality is more hit or miss, i kind of alternate between being really funny and really weird and awkward. still think i should have a gf, many lads who i would rate as inferior to myself have fairly cute ones even.

sleeping on my new memory foam mattress for the second time tonight lads
it's fucking unreal
don't know I slept on that springy sack of shit before

>>68208415
what if you don't have either haha

>>68208449
yeah let me in

>>68208461
He's not lying.

>>68208405
battyman

>>68207670

but of course you WOULD shop there because it's the place with the dumbest people on the tills, and the least conspicuous location to disperse of counterfeits.

in one of those shitty shops i have seen someone hand 2 £50 notes over to a kid who looked about 17 and didn't have a clue.

>>68208490
post skype ya wank

should've been a soldier lads

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>Are Italians white?

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>>68208461

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what did they mean by this

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>>68208373
Then it's time for an update.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lvPyWhuqhcc

this dudes a really good kickboxer

kinda like k1 more than pure mt because its like more boxing focused

>>68208497
FOB (breeder).

>>68208376
Nobody knows, it was a Russian show apparently.

>sesh

That means smoking weed with friends

As well as supplementing someone some weed when they have none

i.e "dont worry, i'll sesh you"

>>68208461
once took far too much mandy whilst walking around the streets and thought a group of people were lamas and shouted asking why they were lamas waking on the streets at this time of night

just got weird looks back

i dont have the personality or the looks to get a gf (or to make friends)

looks like i'm in for about 60 years or loneliness, solitude and misery until i die and am put in an unmarked grave

cool

(/depression hours/ has started, right?)

>>68208531
cant believe you actually just posted a crossbow

When you're tripping football just looks like a big school playground and they've got guys who were good on their playgrounds too so we got them to come to our playgrounds and play us so all our parents (fans) could watch

>>68208394
I knew what was coming and wasn't expecting to laugh but I liked how you worded the last part :3

>>68208473
maybe those inferior lads have just worked harder? you should give it a try x

>>68208486
don't know x

could try working hard at it? you know, start making friends with lots of girls, hanging out with them and then hoping you hit it off. haven't a clue if that would work though and I'm not really one to advise on this since I have personality, looks, and a gf x

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>>68208522
struggled to read that one

*transformerizes into chicken*
*periods oonto your plate*

Breakfast is served.

>>68208461
this gets old really really quickly

purge the scots

gas the taigs

bully the welsh

>>68208585
thx i thought of it all by myself

>mate texts me to tell me my boat's been banged up and the contents strewn around the parking lot
ffs it was probably that storm
should have listened to frankie

>>68208572
just remember you're not alone mate

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Birds, lads.

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what are you getting/giving for christmas lads?

gonna drink the rest of my lucozade instead of alcohol now

The gimmick's coming along well lads.

>>68208532
>finest striker on the planet

nah

>>68208634
consumerist items which i can't justify purchasing for myself but i'm okay with others purchasing for me

>>68208572
rorke v rasheed has finished, rorke won


official /depression hours/ starts now

My birthday is in 6 days lads (december 9th)

Why are Yanks like this?

Is it an attention thing? DO they just like making noise and being noticed?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cqU58Q72acA

>>68208638
he's not but impressive nonetheless

Fuck sake, gran's just back from America and bought me the unsalted instead of the salted peanut butter prezzels

>>68208572
what's wrong with your personality? no chance of fixing the looks but it's possible the personality could be improved x

TUGG SET

>>68208667
It's been my birthday for half an hour desu.

>watching capeshit

>>68208667
mine is on december 12th

its a monday so i will probably spend all day working, fucks sake

will probably call in sick

No point in living without love I think

>>68208669
WOOOOO

>>68208634
I'm 21 and a semi normie but I've never gave a Christmas present
mummy says she doesn't want anything and I've never had a gf during Christmas

>>68208697
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9OemYZUPjO4

was just listening to this

woah

>>68208683
happy birthday lad

have a great day m8

>>68208683
happy birthday x

Off to the Tesco, you lads want anything?

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>>68208683
happy birthday m80

>>68208683
HB lad

>>68208719
>>68208731
Thanks lads

>>68208277
i wish i were part of the illuminati ;_;

>>68208683
How old mate

>>68208700
Seriously though, why?

>>68208738
crate of baked beans

>>68208738
here's my clubcard, scan this at the checkout will ya

>>68208683
happy deathday >:)

>>68208738
all yanks to fuck off pls

>>68208746
>>68208747
>>68208750
>>68208760

Thanks, and I'm 23 now.

>>68208676
There's nothing really wrong with my personality in itself, I can be nice and usually am to most people.

It's just that I'm a fucking spacker and most likely on the spectrum. I can't connect with people really. I'll get on with them and stuff, but it never develops into a friendship or anything like that. I just make acquaintances but not friends. Also feel like no-one actually likes me in the slightest

haha

>so-called mates say they wouldnt lick a girls butthole or buttcrack, not even an insanely attractive girl's
>say its gross because poop comes from there
>all 3 of them are in agreement, no lick
>i nod my head and agree but i dont
would definitely lick a girl's bum if i had the chance. maybe even a nasty sweaty one if it belonged to an attractive girl. tbhonest i think they're lying to appear more normie, like i did

thoughts on licking bums, y/n

>>68208709
>mummy says she doesn't want anything

get her something you soft cunt

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>mum """"invites"""" me on holiday to the caribbean
>have to pay for my own airfare
>its my christmas present

ah yes thank you so much for letting me use the couch bed in your vacation home mother how generous of you

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>>68208683
hPPPPPPPPPPYYYYYYY BIRTHDAY >>68208683

>>68208709
>mummy says she doesn't want anything
get her one of those yankee candles lol

Whehey

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>>68208683

>>68208781
alri grandad x

>>68208669
Remind me what happened at the end of the first one?

I thought she/he died in the research facility

>>68208785
don't know what though

>>68208784
eating a girl's bumhole would be the pinnacle of my life 2bh

>>68208784
it's a no from me

an ex-gf asked me to do it once and I couldn't hide my disgust

>see a disgusting post on /int/
>9/10 times it's a yank, the other 1/10 times it's the haitian refugee in sweden

>>68208794
she wants the d lad

GEH IN MOY SUN

>>68208784
no boys round here
*spreads her arse cheeks and destroys her bumhole with my tongue*

Nothing wrong with drinking a nice splash of wine. Alone or with my friends I'll routinely pair a dry merlot with my feast. Beer is a poor man's drink, meant to keep him sane between work weeks.

>>68208782
don't know what to say lad

i hope it gets better for us but it probably won't as i wrote something like that years back here and it never got better for me

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Jade > Leigh Anne >>>>> Jessy >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> whatever the white one's name is

>>68208825
suggestions:

winter jacket
spa day
perfume/cosmetics
handbag or purse
watch

>>68208784
i mean like if they were actually clean then i probably wouldn't have a problem with it

>>68208849
dad is also going on the trip mate

Alri

big fan of yank posters these last few months, they've improved a lot
that one /pol/ mong can top himself though
leafs still as awful as ever

>>68208808
got her one for a birthday before haha

did a sleep earlier and my leg was in an awkward position and as a result in my dream i had a really painful leg that just kept getting worse

thanks for reading goodnight

apparently it's grossly offensive to society that someone with no life could turn down a once a year social occasion for no good reason

>>68208873
don't know their names but the correct order is 1,2,4,3

>>68208827
>an ex-gf asked me to do it
w-what
>I couldn't hide my disgust
why? was she ugly

>>68208899
stay up with me pls

>>68208873
i've never thought any of them were very fit desu but jade and blondie are alright

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just watched Finding Dory
where do I recognise this thing from?

>>68208784
ye

wouldnt immediately after a shit or something but if it was clean then sure

>>68208862
egregious post

>>68208823
No. Joel couldn't let her die, so fucked shit up, broke in and rescued her. They then went back to Tommy's settlement and it ended there.

>>68208873
2 1 3 4

>>68208907
what occasion

>>68208782
Being nice really doesn't cut it 2bh, no one like a suck up. You can't be friends with anyone except utter runts if you're just a nice but clingy guy.

I'm quite a cunt and have a fair few friends, including a best mate of 7 years. What's important is whether you have a defined character and whether you're fun to hang out with. Make sure you have things you're interested in and views that you actually hold and believe in.

>>68208784
you would instantly regret it

>>68208873
cat hits me up said he wants a little fix
two brown and two white - little mix

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>>68208911
work at 6

>>68208922
dodgeball/peter lorre

>>68208963
oh dear lad

enjoy your 4 hours of sleep then x

>>68208865
yeah i did that too and i keep hoping things will get better but they never do

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>>68208927
what did he mean by this

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>just watched Finding Dory

Need a meteorologist gf

fuckin bizarre lurking the instagrams of people i went to school with and realising they're complete fucking dweebs

>>68208909
not ugly, just the idea of licking bumholes doesn't sit right with me

doing a 90s nostalgia

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Swd3TSkwa4

>>68208876
mum is not particularly 'girly' nor a consumerist runt

>>68208873

3 is an utter goblin

>>68208990
i'm surprised at how many people are fat as now

saw some guys the other night who were pretty thin in school who are now noticeably overweight

>>68208922
Is it any good? sister wanted me to download it but I forgot about it

>>68208991
this

pains me to have something in common with a fucking paddy

>>68208977
tnx i will :3

is having a gf as comfy as i imagine it is?