/brit/

Tits are soft

>>66794005
Questo

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rasheed

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>>66794005
you...you're back

ah yes, "google"
*surreptitiously opens bing*

>>66793937
you sound like you wear glasses

At Australian airports they literally pressure wash you down because of the risk of quarantine/invasive species

If they find some sort of contaminant then they send you to refugee camps in Nauru

>>66794005
there's boobs printed on that shirt

*alerts the janny*

made the gf k hole so I could shag her while she wasn't conscious

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>Facebook comment: Can anyone ID the big guy on the end ?? He assaulted someone last night and sent them to hospital !!!!

Absolutely screeching

>>66794040
not for long >>66794060

Gonna apply to another company department my current boss hates tomorrow, if they reject me my career is ruined haha

>>66794046
no, but I am a virgin that spends a lot of time doing maths

lift heavy they said
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8CIFmy4rVg

The wife battered me in the bollocks with a hoover handle
Because I forgot to take the meat out of the freezer

>>66794067
me 3rd from left

>>66794005
this 2bh

Right lads. Grab a pen and Jot this down.

The only thing I can do Is to inform you that I have a great time in the morning and I will be a bit too often enough aha

Haven't had a boner in 4 days

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>>66793998
Soon I will lead a horde of 100,000 Canadian lumberjacks across the Atlantic Ocean to pillage and rape the British people.

>>66794067
me with the monobrow

>>66794067
Could heem the lot

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A most sinister looking fellow

>>66794067
>getting battered by that fat sack of shit
you'd be in hospital from the pure humiliation alone

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>>66794109
>>66794135

Going to get the gf to grind my bollocks into a fine red mist

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>>66794108
Should've done as you were told

>>66794067
could deck them all

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the lawn

Is heem a real word? Or is it just on /brit/?

battered the gf so hard hahah wish you were watching truly an outstanding performance from urs truly

>>66794154
rock hard thinking about this

donal tran jajajaja

is it halloween yet?

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>eeer boz hav ye any yokes on ticcc

working hard this one, new videos every 24-48hrs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=snCNw2B9pwo

Lads, what's your embarrassing story?

Mine is when I was you get I would run around the playground flapping my arms and squawking like a bird.

>>66794067
haha deanos turns into a mentalist after a few drinks xx

>>66794165
you're a little poofter
honestly reckon my bird would knock you out

>>66794186
Yes
I managed to pour concrete into all the graves at the cemetery just in time

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Turned 18 and looks like a 40 year old woman who smokes three 20 decks a day

>>66794196
Could heem all 3

Literally taking the day off work to stay up and watch the leccy

>>66793998
excelsior!

>>66794160
Would mow it/10

dont feel too good too be desu

>>66794161
started on /sp/ from the world star threads where there was this video of a guy basically being beaten to death and the guy recording does a close up of the guy completely unconscious and says "heem sleepy" so it was that then over time it became heem then got associated with UFC threads

>>66794196
>on tic
haven't heard that one in a while

>>66794244
could heem the lot of em

>>66794207
I shit all over my self last night

>>66794229
could batter your dad and lick his arsehole after

someone emptied a bag of flour on my door at halloween once

>>66794161
It's a /brit/ticism tb h

>>66794270
How

sorry not sorry

just pulverised my testicles after the gf called me a weak willed loser

>>66794264
>>66794262
>>66794246
>>66794220
>>66794157
>>66794147
>>66794138
>>66794135
>>66794109
awww id heem them all id batter every one of them

could yas come up with something a bit more original yas cunts

>>66794247
would love to ruin your day by setting fire to your house or sommat

pinched the gf's cheek and gave her a playful flick on the wrist after she castrated our son and raped him with a steel rod before eloping to Kazakhstan with a drug dealer she had contacted HIV from and infected me with

>>66794281
Gonna heem you

>>66794281
it really isn't

>>66794244
jesus

>>66794244
1,3,2,4
(the order in which i would heem these twats)

>>66794160
a top lad did this to the grass area at the center of a big roundabout. it stayed up for nearly a week but now there's just 1 sign up

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gf psyching up for a big PB

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>>66794260

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bit of the left please yes sir x

love me a redhead

>>66794281
bet you're that mong who thought nonce was /brit/ticism as well

Could heem every single one of you shrews

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*flexes my mooscles*
*bares my teeth at you*
*hisses*

if everyone in this thread was cloned and put into a deathmatch, i could say without even a modicum of doubt that my clone would be the last one standing over your clone's shriveled excuses for bodies

>>66794161
>>66794260
What about /bleep/

WHAT DOES 'BLEEP' MEAN LADS I NEED TO KNOW?

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>>66794160
this made me kek desu

according to national statistics, around 50% of us here will be female

i know i'm one. how many others are around?

>>66794388
Heems u

>>66794359
*flops willy onto your face*

>>66794359
Accidentally poured skittles all over myself

had a fucked up childhood and think I may now be a compulsive liar 2bh lads

>>66794412
Gottem

>>66794403
*blushes*

>>66794285
Dont know

Woke up with shit splattered on my floor and my pants completely ruined

>>66794388
*sends your teeth flying with a heemmaker*

>>66794397
electronic music
you pleb

Love ambien, feel lighter than air, as opposed to the dihydrocodeine i had last night where i felt like i weighed 500kg.

>first gf had a mental breakdown and lives in a mental hospital
>second gf killed herself because she was a bit mental
>third gf died in a car crash

ah yes

shan't be partaking in relationships for a very long time

reckon I can and will deck any irish twat

>tfw 5'4 and built like an Icelandic skittle pourer

>>66794443
Americanised trouser sharter

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Get these cunts a hot shower and some sudocream

>>66794479
you are fat

>>66794485
Post it

>>66794455
Yeah but why 'bleep'? Does it stand for something?

could pulverise any frog i come across

>>66794281

bet you think "we wuz kingz" is an internet creation as well

>>66794482
Last gf married the guy she met after me
Ah yes

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Jealous ass white boi in the back tryna ruin a niggaz chances

just decided i'm flying to iceland just to shart in their mart

>>66794493
me on the right looking at the camera

>>66794493
>knee deep
if these lads are ever knee deep I'll off myself, because the species is doomed

>>66794331

Did he actually die? It was one brutal beating, dozens of stamps to the head

What are niggers such subversive cucks?

https://youtu.be/LRc0KGRjfec?t=219

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post pics of reviewbrah looking cute lads :3 x

Why he does not post toot

>>66794421
lying is a useful tool

I used to feel bad about doing it, but everybody does it

Icelad speaks English remarkably well, very impressed with him.

>>66794528
No marts to shart in, pardner

>>66794495

BMI is only 23

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>Anon! we're so happy to see you, glad you came!
>you know its not healthy for you to remain holed up in that room of yours
>these are the best years of your life! lets partay!!!

*feeds you a worm*
*waits until you're not looking and pushes you out of the nest*

Dont know how to speak English

I should try being gay.

Maybe guys won't be so insane or die in a car crash

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pAzgpHPQKCg

fucking tune

any paddy twat wanna get battered
swear imma genocide the paddys call me potato haha

>>66794421
I'm a compulsive truth teller when I'm drunk

Scared off so many girls by being too honest tb h

>>66794563
Iceland is too poor to have one MacDonalds ha ha

>>66794610
Postea toot

>>66794561
Thank you, mate
Doing my best

>>66794557
but I lie about everything, even stuff that I have no reason to lie about

and half the time I know everyone knows that I'm bullshitting

>>66794504
bleep bloop music is a common term for electronic music

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fuck sake lads my 'itis is getting with her gf again! infront of me!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6FVHZfBTZY

got called cuckio in walmart

are the icelandese ironically going to elect the pirate party
that'll be laughs

Any Yule Lads in

was necking a girl on Friday all night and haven't texted her all weekend
was both p drunk
is that bad practice

>>66794661
Me

Gimmick idea: Bring back the Anglo-Saxon word for "please" which is "queamen"

>>66794586
Delete this post queamen

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this stuff is so delicious

Need a piss

Can't be arsed going though

need a bf to cuddle

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Me on the left

>>66794602
Men are more likely to be in a fatal accident and 100% of gay men are insane

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>>66794563
this looks like a good place to shart

wonder if any icelandic gyal wants of a 5'4 man

>>66794005
Missed you tbqh lad.

>Might have Bronchitis

How fucked am I lads?

>>66794648
Certain I've got a webm of that somewhere

>>66794710
damnit

I'll just have to become a monk or something

>>66794741
you'll be fine

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>>66794696
brudder that's some distilled piss if i've ever drank whiskey in my life

any man here?

>>66794696
Excellent choice (although, like all ryes, it's a Canadian knockoff)

Almost started doing a wank there but then I remembered that one time a girl asked me to lift her and I physically couldn't so now I'm going to bed so I can get up early and lift.

>Mountain biking enthusiast Gary Johnson is having a tough election season, what with that Syria gaffe and his running mate suggesting folks might want to go ahead and vote for someone else. The Guardian’s Paul Lewis located and rode Johnson’s last nerve, causing Johnson to demand, “Why are you even interviewing me?”

>Lewis began by trying inquire about Johnson’s low poll numbers, currently hovering around six percent or so nationally.

>“I don’t know where 6.1 percent comes from,” Johnson said, pointing out that he’s polling better other places, like New Mexico, where he was governor. “I have no idea.”

>“I’ll tell you where it comes from,” Lewis replied. “It comes from an average of all of the polls. So it takes all of the polls, it looks at the consensus.”

>“Well why are you here then, at 6.1 percent?” Johnson erupted. “Why are you even interviewing me? I don’t get it. If I’m doing so poorly, is this to preside over a funeral here? It’s not a funeral! It’s a celebration!”

>Lewis also asked about Evan McMullin, who’s polling very well in Utah, where he’s from. Johnson replied, ““It’s a bit of a stretch to be comparing my candidacy with his,” before adding, “You know what? He is what he is, and I begrudge no one for entering the race.”

>Finally, Lewis asked Johnson about his proposal to abolish the IRS. “Most of the world’s major economists disagree with you,” he pointed out.

>“Look, I don’t want to argue,” Johnson replied.

>“It’s not a question of arguing...” Lewis began.

>“Look, I came out for the legalization of marijuana,” Johnson suddenly near-shouted. “And I had people in my face for years and years and years talking about how stupid and how idiotic it was that we should allow marijuana to be legal.”

>“What’s that got to do with your tax policy?” Lewis replied, sounding sincerely puzzled.

>“It’s leadership,” Johnson retorted. “It is leadership.”

>>66794665
>talked to fit bird at party last night
>had half a g of mandy, a can of K cider and 4 skol supers by that point so I was quite wavey
>get with her
>forgot to get her number before I left
I'm an enormous mong tbqh

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>>66794715
looks fuccable desu

>>66794712
I'm in this image

Imagine living in iceland
How do they get electricity n that in thier igloos

How much do you pay for your car insurance and how much did it drop after your first year?

Currently paying 1100 for a 1.2 Corsa....

Would like to get myself something nice in a couple years, maybe 3 as the car I have is almost new.

>>66794563
can I come to iceland for a bit

>>66794602
Hi ;)

does anyone have that video where this kid is yelling at 3 other kids for being in the hallway? he says "i'm a prefector" or something

>>66794741
It just sucks for 3 - 4 days

>>66794811
I'M A PREFECT

>>66794753
Just marry a Muslim woman, or a blind girl, or a blind muslim, pretty much anyone that isn't allowed to drive will be fine.

>>66794777
Do people still think that's me?
That is the guy who keeps posting bwm, landabois, alcohol and unironic homosexuality

I'm much better looking

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>>66794005
Welcome back Caralad

idea: tactical mart sharting

>>66794825
GET
OOOUUUT

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>Do people still think that's me?
>That is the guy who keeps posting bwm, landabois, alcohol and unironic homosexuality
>I'm much better looking

>>66794758
Hi

>>66794825
>>66794861
just found it. great video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y9lkxK45IaE

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>appchan x no longer displaying a countdown after posting

ah yes

>>66794791
Yes?
You don't need my permission to come be a tourist in Iceland

business idea: we all go on omegle with /brit/ as an interestand try to find each other

I need memes

CONDUCTOR WE HAVE A PROBLEM

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>>66794726
>>66794835
thanks babes missed you too

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You ever get nostalgic with a certain smell. Mum wore an old perfume and I just had to take a big whiff ,

Business idea: Become a friend for hire for lonely people, for example, if someone has no one to go the cinema with then they charge me £10 to hang out with them or for any other activity

>>66794881
Fair play to Henry for not decking him. Doubt I'd have the restraint.

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>>66794826
that could work

fucking cant stand club photos

>>66794912
How much for a bumming?

>>66794889
slashes don't work on omegle's tag system, and "Brit" might be too vague a term

would suggest a more specific tag: "runt"

>>66794917
Henry sounded like a proper wet wipe though
As did his mates

>>66794886
can you ask your president if you see him in he domino's line if it's cool

>>66794515
iktf but they got divorced after a couple months. i told her she should've picked me

>tfw you spend so much time with people that you can now identify farts as male or female
You know the weirdest part? Female farts are probably worse.

>>66794932

No sexual stuff, a hug is okay though.

>>66794881
the prefect legit posted here btw

>>66794940
OK then, everyone put runt as your interests on omegle

>>66794881
that's not the full version

http://www.wordsthatfollow.com/play/game.php?gid=26

http://www.wordsthatfollow.com/play/game.php?gid=26

http://www.wordsthatfollow.com/play/game.php?gid=26

pass is runts
in search of new talent, contact at your earliest convenience

stuck on the uzuki and kariya fight lads
rarely get them below half hp

>>66794954
Henry strikes me as one of those lads that acts hard for his mates, but deep down, he's actually a good lad.

>>66794955
I'm not allowed anywhere near him because of threatening letters I sent him

>>66794964
yeah, he's Devon

>>66794825
ya looky i din FOOKin drop yuh

not cold enough to wear my beanie cap around yet and my hair is in the terrible awkward phase

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>>66794134
Might of worked 50 years ago but lumberjacks aren't what they used to be

Kill yourselves fucking scumbags

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Me in the middle

>>66794889
>>66794940
>>66794966
Gonna do this in 10 mins lads

>>66795012
hmm don't ruin my chances please

The icelandic homosexual

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>>66794881
>"drop him henry"
>"he's tensing his fist"
>I'M A PREFECT completely at a loss when his wannabe teacher front fails

Genuinely can't come up with a runt order in this video, they're all that bad

When i was 14-16 I used to go with my mates to the babby disco and we would just batter anyone who was looking a go in the place, everyone was afraid of us.

Then on our first night at an over 18s disco a pile of 20 year old farmers bate the fucking shite out of us. I picked fights more carefully after that.

>>66794980
FUCK

what the fuck is a prefect

we never had those at my school

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The Trotskyist hombre

>>66795119
we call them hall monitors here

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RkMQnY7FtDs

listening to the so called crossbreed

the irony is iceland's major party is literally called the "pirate party" and the mexican hates pirates

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me 'nt missus

>>66794759

I drank some canadian royal whisky in revelstoke, BC and and it was crap.

drank molson every day when i was there and it tasted great since i'd been drinking PBR for 2 months prior

Will it be queenkino?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JWtnJjn6ng0

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>>66795020
Been wearing my toque for a couple weeks now

I always thought prefects were a harry potter thing

>>66794244
far left is a personification of the north, absolute STATE of that slag. utterly grim.

At least i am not homosexual

>>66795154
>major party
yes with 3 seats in the althing

going to bed lads

might be a NEET again by the end of tomorrow so prepare for 24hr depression rants and shitposting x

>>66794975
>>66794975
>>66794975
>>66794975
>>66794975
we're all terribly unfunny, please join

holy shit if we had prefects and my school they would've been absolutely murdered

>>66795184
Neither am I
That's the other guy

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A heart that's full up like a landfill
A job that slowly kills you
Bruises that won't heal

You look so tired and unhappy
Bring down the government
They don't, they don't speak for us
I'll take a quiet life
A handshake of carbon monoxide

>>66795188
look forward ro them x

>>66795185
http://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-37813564

lel

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>>66795154

>>66795157
here i stand with my big retard baby. he is 14 years old and much taller than me. he has pissed his pants and his shoelaces are undone. i am so proud of him

>>66795189
i'm unironically good at that but i'm a bit busy hun x

>>66795223
hello you cunt

>Tfw have a beard and it is Movember soon

How do I not be lumped in with the posers?

>>66795184
that's something I can't say haha

>>66795157
hello you cunt

>>66795166
Crown Royal? It's not the best unless you get a premium edition.
Canadian Club and Alberta Premium rye whisky are both better and widely available.
The former was so good that America had to enact laws to keep it from ruining their whiskey market.

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She looks awful now

I was a prefect at school and I smoked, bullied others and got in fights

it means fuck all, you could do whatever you wanted in secondary just dont get caught

watching boogie talk about how literally every bone and connecting tendon in his body is literally in immense pain 24/7

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me and the lads on runt island x

post toot

>>66795266
what do you do in high tide?

>>66795266

Are you the one crying and wanking on a rock?

have to be up at about 7 tomorrow
do i neck this can of cheapo energy drink
how long do the effects last

>>66795189
password

>>66795242
doesnt matter

>>66795218
pirates...

numa numas a choon boys

my a hee my a hoo my a haa haa my a heeee

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>worked my arse off for past year
>buy new car that I've always wanted
>other day
>dads car is at the garage
>asks to borrow mine for shop
>say I don't really trust him as he's a SHIT driver
>gets all arsey about it
>fine, take it
>mfw he backed the cunt into a bollard and fucked up my bumper

I FUCKING KNEW HE WOULD DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS. FUCK. ME!!

>>66795244
haha want a blowjob?

>>66795324
yer das a runt and ur a specky cunt ur da sells avon yehoo

>>66795324
Falling for the wheeled Jew
Shig

>>66795324
What sort of car?

might start posting in french
comme ça vous comprendrez enfin l’agression visuelle qu'est une langue autre que la langue maternelle

Might sell my car and fuck off to a random place in the world and try to get a job

>irish intellectuals

>>66795248

I'll look into them but I'd be surprised if I could get either of them over here

>>66795362
je nai pas du gomme

66795362
Post le toot

HELLO YOU CUNT

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>>66795353

>>66795382
oxymoron

>>66795362
je suis le voiture dans le jardin. c'est mon anniversaire

>>66795405
Then don't live with your parents

>>66795324
you've posted this shite with various sources of supposed damage to your car. what the fuck is your end game?

>>66795405
'ri 'eano

>>66795392
>>66795411
hahah fucking hell mate state of you

ah yes boys hes here

So I did acid with my oneitus and yeah.

she ain't my type, acid made me realise this.

Why yes I am of Hibernian descent, of a certain fenian persuasion

And yes, I am an intellectual

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might stimulate the penis

but to what is the question?

>>66795411
this one?
>>66795405

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>balls are called bollocks
>willy isn't called bollard

hmmmm

Do not engage him

might suck a cock

might not

>>66795436
GOOD post

>>66795362
mais je comprend le français mon gars, et quand tu prend ton clique tu nique ta mère

alors, tu a une soeur?

>>66795444
Thought she fucked Chad and as a result fucked her off
Haven't been on here proper for a couple days
Sappenin

>>66795447
Got a few fresh pics of me if you want

>>66795476
yes I have one

why does britain look so different to the rest of europe

>>66795494
please x

not gay but I wouldn't object to a male sucking my willy as long as all other physical contact was extremely limited

la bière vraiment petite et mousseuse

fair play henry fair play

>>66795510
to be honest I want to see what getting bummed is like but I have no attraction to men

nofap got a lot easier after I kissed a girl tb h

When I die, fuck it I wanna go to hell
Cause I'm a piece of shit, it ain't hard to fuckin' tell
It don't make sense, goin' to heaven wit the goodie-goodies
Dressed in white, I like black Tims and black hoodies
God will probably have me on some real strict shit
No sleepin' all day, no gettin my dick licked
Hangin' with the goodie-goodies loungin' in paradise
Fuck that shit, I wanna tote guns and shoot dice
All my life I been considered as the worst
Lyin' to my mother, even stealin' out her purse
Crime after crime, from drugs to extortion
I know my mother wished she got a fuckin' abortion

>>66795485
nm lad, being degenerate as always, on acid and getting smashed 3 nights a week as per.

That feel when you go for a pißs after holding it in for like 3 hours

>>66795266
Me in the white shirt

/gf2016/ just hit a bump in the road lads

Nosex got a lot easier after I started wanking 3 times a day

When I box, it isnt boxing. Its art. Its magnificence. Its beauty personified. I will be professional in a few years time.

>>66795564
post your little mate

>>66795562
same la

Lost my final friend, have no way of meeting girls anymore

was so fucking close as well

>>66795548
Safe lad

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjqAsbufsTI

join the fun lads

he should be arriving shortly

>>66795562
wish i got hit on a road

diff between 100ug and 200ug lads?

>>66795510
I'm up for it if you've got a nice cock

want to start a /brit/ society at my uni

laptop BSOD and now its been doing updates for 5 minutes
did I get a virus

>>66795583
how so, i also lost my last mate

>>66795595
why is his pilot always late

>>66795576
gay twat

>>66795583
wew, I'm sorry la' mine isn't even a bump in comparison

the girl I was talking to hasn't replied to my text in 4 hours

>>66795583
Final friend? Youre never going to make another friend ever?

>>66795611
ye i infected you

>>66795601
looks about a hundred

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time to smoke a cheeky spliff

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>>66795384
It would be a shame if you couldn't get Crown Royal Monarch 75th Anniversary blend. It was made to commemorate the trans-Canada train journey of HRH King George the VI and Her Majesty the Queen.
It's much better than normal CR.

If you normally like scotch, you might not like Canadian whisky, but if you like Irish whiskey, then you will like Canadian.

>>66795621
Prob cause youre a bent twat

>>66795624
Have literally no way of doing so

>>66795614
He just said he wanted to cut me off. I thought he was joking but he's cancelled on me twice since.

>>66795620
he's been in four different states today doing rallies haha crazy

just hit a bump in the road, turns out it was just some runt; reversed and ran him over again

>>66795653

>>66795653

>>66795653

new

>>66795633
Drug addict

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drumpf jet

>>66795648
why would he want to cut you off?

guyz I think I'm straight

>>66795654
wish it was me under your car

>>66795436
Why be rude if he is trying? Fermé ta gueule ou fuck off pêh

>>66795634

would love to do that train journey

>>66795498
post her face

>>66795648
there must be a reason why
are you a sex offender or drug/drink addict ?

>>66795681
Me too tbqh

>>66795653

Did you know that Bill Clinton has a black son?

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thoughts and r8s