>TFW you'll never serve in the Roman army >TFW you'll

>>3182842
>tfw you'll probably die at age 30

tfw stabbed to death by friends cause some douche deserted

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>>3182985
That whole thing is nonsense, the average is only that because of the high child mortality rates

>tfw you will never live in 10AD
>tfw you will never die an agonizing fever death at 30 because of impacted wisdom teeth

>>3182842
>ywn invade the franks
>ywn be given normandy to guard paris from other raiders
>ywn have a qt frankish gf and make little normans with her
why even bother

Romans were subhumans

>>3183040

This is actually true, if you made it past 10 years old, you had a pretty chance of making it to 55+ if you didn't get killing by the plague, or eat by wolves, or stabbed to death by an angry mob paid by your political opponents, or .........

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>>3183065
Go back to Gaul, ginger knob.

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>>3182842

Yeah but modern times has infinite free porn and cheap tins of sardines so I'll take modern times

>>3182842
>ywn live in the time of the greatest men on earth, the time which summarized the next 2000 years, the time in which shadow we are forced too live forever: the late roman republic
The angry mob is worth being alive during these times

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>>3183091
Who needs porn when you have literal sex slaves?

>>3183109

But slavery is unethical

>>3183130
Who gives a shit it wasn't back then. When in Rome as they say.

>>3182842
>TFW you'll never get rewarded with your own plot of land for military service
that was only really the case after the gracchi and marian reforms

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>>3183130
>comparing modern morales and ethnics to those of the ancient world

>>3183061
>ywn be a Norman viking invading England to spread the tongue and ways of his French overlords

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>>3182842

>TFW you'll never serve in the Roman army

Do you pledge your undying loyalty to the Emperor? I'm not bringing back blood sport though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m53HSux40Ck

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>>3182842
>tfw die In first battle

>>3183375

>serve in the roman army
>some dickhead in your century does something that pisses off someone higher up
>tfw your century gets decimated
>tfw you die because some asshole you don't know did something to piss off someone else you don't know

>>3183007
lol

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>>3183326
>tfw you'll never be this autistic

>>3182842
>ywn die in a pointless civil war
what a tragedy

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>>3184270
>>tfw you'll never be this autistic

tfw humans believe authority is sanctioned by other humans and violence and not God.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZ0MGj1jAoc

>>3183040
>>3183068
This, wild Humans can easily live into their 50s without medical intervention.
Even Chimps can live that long in the wild
>>3184383
Oho, don't be too sure, anon. You may, especially if you're a gommie

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>>3184270
>tfw you'll never be this autistic

This species is in huge trouble when they consider me a joke but protecting a genocidal talking burning bush and its delusional followers is considered of paramount importance.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uG7VtVr4eFw

The US is lowkey trying to emulate Rome's military class.

>Get paid to go to college
>Get the best health insurance in a country with high-quality healthcare that isn't bogged down by universal healthcare
>Great retirement plan
>Base-allocated housing

They bring you up in society if you enlist

>>3182842
>be middle class son of a merchant in Rome
>always look up to the Legions as what true men are like
>as soon as I can swing a sword I can enlist
>train and work hard, eventually get recognized by my centurion
>distinguish myself in border skirmishes, the legatus finally takes notice
>for my service I am moved to Augustus' personal legions
>my father and mother could not hold back their tears of pride as they saw me at attention in shining armor
>be put under a command of a guy named Varus, after beating some barbarian scum under Tiberius
>march out under rumors of a revolt from a man named Arminius
>it was a trap, as we march barbarians pour from the hills and assail our positions
>the swamp sucks at our legs, making combat maneuvering impossible
>days of miserable rain and marching ensued, watching my brothers die as we retreat back toward Roman borders
>another ambush materializes out of the damned forests
>the cavalry, seized by cowardice makes a break for Roman walls far over the horizon but are cut down by barbarians lying in wait
>we rally around the golden eagle, fighting as hard as we can against the endless horde
>ask Varus for orders, but he has none
>the coward kills himself, declaring all hope to be lost
>look to the aquila, and find myself unwilling to give up and surrender the pride of Rome to the enemy
>the standard bearer is killed by a barbarian who broke through our lines, he is quickly slain in revenge
>throw down my scutum and raise the eagle high while continuing the fight
>realize I lost my footing and dropped the eagle
>try as I might, I can't will myself to seize the banner stuck in the mud
>realize I can't move, that I can't feel the armor on my back or the steel on my neck
>pray to Jupiter and Mars for strength, if they will grant it I will keep fighting, they just have to give me a chance
>realize the din of battle around me has faded
>realize that I can't feel anything anymore
>realize that I can't see the eagle anymore

>>3182842
>Gladiator battles
I'd bet 90% of you faggots wouldn't watch them if they were a thing.

>>3184867
legiones redde

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>>3184867