>Watching Punic War tragedy in local amphitheater >Non

>Non Est Me

At least do it right, dipshit. Latin is easier than ever to learn

>>2889305
Just got a mental image of a 19 year old legionnaire with Natus est occidere painted on his helmet rolling out of the back of a chariot while a grizzled, old optio screams at him to clear a nearby hovel with his gladius, all to the tune of Fortunate Son.

Thank you for that.

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>be Germanic warrior from deep in the Barbaricum
>my gods are strong and my people are noble
>one day some strange shaved men in cloaks enter the homestead and begin telling us of their one god
>confused at this
>how can one god be more powerful than many?
>enquire as to where the shaved men come from
>they tell us they come from the land of the Romans far to the south
>they say that their god is the god of the Romans and the Romans are mighty
>they say there is much wealth in the south and if we open our ears to the religion of the man of the desert we can fight for the Romans and gain much wealth
>land is becoming increasingly bare and sparse, not much is growing any more
>decide to march south with my entire family to sign up with the Roman military
>I couldn't have known where I would end up today

Fucking civilized cunny is the best. Thank you Father Aelianus and Gregorius. Thank you for the life you've given me.

>me and my brother sign up for the Legion
>work hard and become part of Augustus' finest
>sent into germania to slay some barbarian scum and reassert rome's influence
>it was a trap set up by arminius
>watch my brother get stabbed, no time to collect or bury his body as we retreat
>days of slogging through mud and rain running for the borders of home while being picked off left and right
>surrounded and being systematically slaughtered
>I fend off the barbarians as best I can, see our glorious Aquila has fallen
>climb over the bodies of our dead and cut down Germans in my way
>throw down my scutum down and hold the golden eagle of Rome high to rally what men are left for a last stand
>suddenly my arms will not obey me
>the next thing I known I am on the ground, the dirt around me is warm and wet
>see that I have dropped the eagle in my folly
>I try to reach for it but my damned arms won't move
>I pray to Jupiter and Mars to give me strength to give me strength
>I can keep on fighting, I KNOW I can
>the din of battle faded without my realization
>I cannot feel earth under my arms or the armor on my back or the German steel on my neck
>I cannot see the Aquila anymore

>>2889623
That feelus.

Tell me what the punic war was in one post

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>>2889623

>>2889641
Latins vs. Semites

>>2889641
The First Punic War (264 to 241 BC) was the first of three wars fought between Ancient Carthage and the Roman Republic. For more than 20 years, the two powers struggled for supremacy, primarily on the Mediterranean island of Sicily and its surrounding waters, and also in North Africa. The war signaled the beginning of a strategic transformation in the western Mediterranean. Carthage began the war as the great sea-power of the western Mediterranean, while Rome had but a small fleet of fighting ships. Over the course of the war, Rome built up a powerful navy, developed new naval tactics, and strategically used their navy, army, and local political alliances on Sicily in order to achieve a victory that expelled the Carthaginians from Sicily. The First Punic War ended with a treaty between Rome and Carthage, but years of bloodshed were to follow in the Second and Third Punic Wars before the strategic issue of power in the western Mediterranean was resolved in favor of Rome, and in the total destruction of Carthage.

>>2889641
Blobbing autism.

>>2889641
Most aesthetic wars ever.
Hannibal should have put every last r*man to the sword

>>2891386
>Hannibal should have put every last r*man to the sword
More like should have used his familial influence to bring the carthaginian senate to his sway and then beseiged rome.

>>2889305
BOOOOO
BOO TO YOU SIR

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>>2889410

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>>2891467
Based Drawfag

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>>2889410
>and when the band plays "Ave Caesar"
>oooh they point the ballista at you, dominus
>It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no senator's son, son
>It ain't me, it ain't me; I ain't no fortunate one, no

Arminius was a freedom fighter. Varus' legions were unjustly invading to support the military agrarian complex, man.

>>2891516
That's actually pretty rad. I don't normally see pictures from the barbarian perspective.

>>2891516
>Legio XXX

Based Trajan's Victorious Thirtieth

>>2891467
makes me wonder how much the old legion's style would make it into modern warfare, probably not too much

>>2891699
You would not believe how long it took me to find that specific picture in my unsorted,12 gig image folder, or maybe you're as disorganized as me and you would.

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>>2891467

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>be me
>join the legion
>dad saved enough for my equipment
>feel pratrician af
>Imperator Tiberius is a cool guy
>Germanic auxialiaries lead us to a swamp
>forest on our right
>river on our left
>it's raining
>my sandals hurt
>still no sign of barbarians
>suddenly they rush out of the wood
>auxiliaries join the barbarians
>centurion impale himself on his gladius to avoid humiliation
This campaign sucks, I want to go back to Rome.

>Is that you Herecles? Is this me?

>Who said that? Who the fuck said that!?
>Who's the Gaul fellating, Eunuch fucking, unmanly son of a satyr that just asked for fustuarium!?
>No one said it? Pluto himself said it? By the Gods.
>I will flog you all! I will flog you all until you fucking die! I will decimate this fucking century!

>Sir, I said it sir!

>Well, no shit? You've got balls. By Hades, I like you. I'll even let you come to my house and fuck my favorite concubine.
*strikes him with staff*
>You sterculinum publicum! I have your name! I'll fuck your ass! You will not laugh! You will not cry! You will learn by the numbers! Get on your fucking feet!

Some folks are born made to wield the shield
Ooh, they're red, white and gold
And when the march starts to the Gaul,
Ooh, they point the spears at you
It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no senator's son, son
It ain't me, it ain't me; I ain't no fortunate one, no
Some folks are born silver spoon in hand
By Jupiter, don't they help themselves, oh
But when the magistrate comes to the door
By Jupiter, the house looks like a rummage sale, yes

It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no patrician's son, no
It ain't me, it ain't me; I ain't no fortunate one, no

Yeah, yeah
Some folks inherit S.P.Q.R weslth
Ooh, they send you down to war
And when you ask them, "How much should we give?"
Ooh, they only answer More! more! more! y'all

It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no legatus' son, son
It ain't me, it ain't me; I ain't no fortunate one, one

It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no fortunate one, no no no
It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no fortunate son, no no no

>>2893308
>>2889410

>>2893280
>Now what's your excuse?
Sir excuse for what, sir?
>I'm asking the fucking questions here, miles, do you understand?
Sir, yes, sir!
>Well thank you very much, can I be in charge for a while?
Sir, yes, sir!
>Are you trepidus, are you timidus?
Sir, I am, sir!
>Do I make you timidus?
Sir?
>"SIR" WHAT? WERE YOU ABOUT TO CALL ME CULUS?
Sir, no, sir!
>How tall are you, miles?
Sir, VI pes IX, sir!
>VI pes IX, I didn't know they stack excrementum that high! Are you trying to squeeze uncia on me somewhere HUH?!
Sir, no, sir!
>By Jupiter, it looks to me the best part of you ran down the crack of your mama's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress, I think you've been cheated! Where in Rome are you from anyway, miles?
Sir, Tarraconensis, sir!
>By Jupiter's cock, only steers and queers come from Tarraconensis and you don't really look like a steer to me so that kind of narrows it down!

>>2891536
Underrated

Stop the Germanic Wars, man. We've been there for years and what have we achieved? nothing. I 'aint no Questor's son--- STOP THE WAR!

>>2889641
muh corn

If Germania was Rome's Vietnam, what was Rome's Operation Desert Storm?

>>2894040
First Dacian War?

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>>2893280

>>2894079
Perfectus

>>2889641
There were three
The First Punic War is actually pretty confusing and complicated but essentially it was a dick measuring contest to see who would get control of Sicily, since it was mostly under Carthaginian control but the romans wanted it. The romans made a bunch of deals, alliances, and innovations and eventually won, but this victory burned a lot of Punic butts and a second war was inevitable.
The Second Punic War is the one everyone loves because it's got Hannibal and elephants and Scipio Africanus and the Fabian Strategy and betrayal, etc. Essentially it started by one particularly butt-blasted Carthaginian named Hamilcar Barca, who was VERY autistic about destroying Rome, so he extra judicially went to Spain and started conquering the area in a way where it was semi-Carthage but also his own personal kingdom? Any way he dies and leaves it to his son Hannibal who you've heard of, and Hannibal basically goes full edgy school shooter and marches to Italy, there are a bunch of battles where the Romans get absolutely BTFO and are wiped the fuck out, but they have a really weird tenacity that lets them keep going. Hannibal then roams Italy for a while, his main strategy is to try and sway the cities of Latium against the romans because they weren't technically Roman citizens so he thought there'd be some animosity he could exploit but he never really manages to flip any cities. His downfall comes because the Carthaginian government's heart was really never in this war, so they never really send him supplies and let him do his own thing, and eventually they all him back to Africa. This is when Scipio Africanus goes to Africa as well to fight Hannibal, and BTFOs him at Zama. The Romans strip Carthage of its overseas territories and make them pay debts to the Romans for a time.
The Third Punic War is basically an epilogue. This is when they destroy Carthage for good and salt the earth and all that shit.

>>2894055
Pretty cool war, that

>>2893645
Kek

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>>2893904

>BUT ROME ACTUALLY WON THAT WAR