>tfw if I was born a century earlier I would have been 58

>>2885285
>probably would have been drafted into both world wars and ended as a lieutenant colonel as a logistics officer by 1945
You probably would have died

>>2885342
No I am good at soldiering I am an expert fall of duty player

>>2885342
He's American, so I wouldn't say that's too likely. American casualty rates could be quite notoriously low so long as you weren't thrown into their minimal disastrous operations.

>>2885285
>would have suffered terribly in WWI
>would have suffered terribly under the Spanish flu
>would have suffered terribly during the great depression
>would have suffered terribly during WWII
>would have suffered terribly slaving away to buy that fucking car
>would have suffered terribly when your grandson drove it into a tree and became part of the worst generation still alive today

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>>2885370
Now I suffer terribly and slave away and can barely afford to buy a 2006 Honda civic

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>tfw if I was born a hundred centuries earlier I would have been 58 by the end of the Battle of Val-ès-Dunes
>probably would have been drafted William the Conqueror and ended as faithful vassal by 1047
>would have lived just long enough to see the invasion and then peacefully dying after he becomes the first Norman King of England
just /his/ thoughts

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>>2885379
>born a hundred centuries earlier I
you had one job...

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>tfw you're diagnosed with stage four cancer when you're young just...because
>it was due to zero lifestyle choices or reasons of your own doing, you're just...sick
>if this was like 30 years earlier, you probably would have died within a few months maybe as short as a month from when you found out you were dying
>thanks to advancements in modern medicine and a bit of luck, you're life is saved
>it's ten years later and you're in a stable job and long term relationship with a nice car and a dog and great family and friends
>you think about the millenia that passed and the millions upon millions upon millions of souls simply born in different times and different places than you, who didn't survive whatever mystery illness befell them when they were young
>you think about this every single day
>and every single day you're thankful for the millions upon millions upon millions of souls who came before that helped lead to the development of procedures and knowledge that helped saved your life
>when you think about this history, every single day, the fact that there is any history to read at all, is a miracle
>life is a miracle, every single day
just /his/ thoughts

>>2885378
Welcome to capitalism

>>2885416
In Soviet Russia, everyone drove a Honda Civic!

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>>2885285

>tfw if I was born a century and a half earlier, I could march alongside my ancestors as one of the University Greys

WHY DID YOU DO TO ME GOD?!

YOU LITERALLY PUT ME IN THE SHITTIEST TIME IN HISTORY

THE WHOLE WORLD'S TURNED UPSIDE DOWN AND NOTHING MAKES SENSE ANYMORE, IT'S AS IF WE'RE LIVING IN AN MDE WORLD PEACE SKIT OR SOMETHING

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>>2885416
can you /leftycuck/s go one thread without proselytizing

jeez

>>2885378
>Now I suffer terribly and slave away and can barely afford to buy a 2006 Honda civic

You need to learn to manage your money.

>>2885411
I really hope we'll reach a future like this.

>>2885416
More like welcome to unregulated capitalism where a powerful few makes government dance like a puppet

>>2885513
> nobody survives cancer today

What did he mean by this?

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>tfw if I was born in 1926 I could have kept her company in hiding

>ywn kiss her growing belly, marveling at her carrying the fruit of your love under her heart
>ywn playfully have a written argument with her over baby names to kill time during the day, passing each other scraps of paper with a name written on one side and your/her rebuttal on the other
>ywn make love passionately at night
>ywn feel the pressure from her incredible weight and huge round belly bearing down on you but have the indescribable pleasure of her tight pussy throbbing on you cock negate any discomfort
>ywn bust your extra thick load into your beautiful, nearly ready to burst Anne, filling your sweet love oven with your seed
>ywn look on smugly as she reaches over to grab a rag she uses to clean up your oozing jizz
>ywn notice her father looking at you approvingly, knowing that you are treating his daughter to the very best of the situation
>ywn be smuggled out of the Annex you have been trapped in for two years with Anne as her due date nears, being given the task of watching after her by her father, gifting you his bayonet, a prized leftover memento from the first war, to use to protect his daughter if all else fails
>ywn help Anne give birth in a Dutch farm turned safehouse deep in the countryside, forever sealing your bond with her
>ywn watch Anne hold the baby in hers arms for the first time, never wanting to let go
>ywn watch Anne breastfeed your child and her embarrassed, yet dotting expression at such intimacy
>ywn quietly watch Anne and the newborn sleep
>ywn all sneak outside one misty morning to stumble upon a lone Allied sharpshooter trundling down the road, acting as a skirmisher for the rest of the Army, and greet him with the sight of a smiling baby, as you have no other gift to offer him. But it nonetheless instantly puts him back in good spirits, knowing that despite a world consumed by slaughter, there is in fact still some humanity left in it.

just /his/ thoughts

>>2885909

Or you could've been gassed and turned into human snowflakes

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>>2885389

>>2885434
I want Yui to raise my children!

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>>2885411
>saved by the modern medicine so u live a couple extra decades
>eventually you die of old age
>death is permanent, death is forever

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>>2885909

>born in 1926
>not joining the Army the moment you turn 18 to join the fight against Nazism and save Anne and all those like her from certain death
>expecting Americans to do all your fighting for you

Pathetic

>>2885909
I LOOOVE YOUUUUUU JESUUUUUUUUS-

but seriously this was fucking touching

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>>2887040

It is, and I would absolutely fuck a nine month pregnant Anne Frank so hard and so many times that she'd go into labor, but that can wait. Every day the Third Reich draws breath adds thousands more like that poor girl to the body count. We can have the baby boom once the war is won, but until then, we've got work to do.

TL;DR Get off your ass and fight!

t. tradition in my family since the Civil War. Confederate ancestor avoided marrying his wife until after he was sent home as an invalid (lost most of his hand at Gettysburg) because he was afraid she'd be left a widow and that any children he had might become a distraction. Everyone in my family that has been in the military since then has waited until they left service to marry.

>>2885285

You woudln't have been drafted at age 54 you dumb cunt. You're a fucking moron.

>>2887084
>Tfw nothing in life to fight for
Dying for a grand cause alongside your brothers is the closest weve got to ultimate meaning. A shame ill never have that feel

>>2887123
Actually towards the end of WWII Germany was recruiting children and old men because all the adults of fighting age were already at war.

>>2887123
Us army tends to recall officers iirc, the us army was massively downsized in between the two world wars so they definitely would have reactivated former experts methinks.

>>2887143
>>2887153

In light of this new infromation, I would like to retract my allegation that you are a fucking moron.

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>>2885909
>ywn be the lagerkommandant at Auschwitz
>ywn spare Anne's life in return for sexual favours
>ywn creampie her tight cunny
>ywn accidentally get her pregnant
>ywn send her to the gas chambers to cover up all evidence of the abomination that had spawned from your degenerate lust

>>2887192
lel what movie did Willem Dafoe pay a nazi in? Must watch

>Born 1893 in a dirty industrial city in the north of England
>20yo at the outbreak of WWI

lol I would definately have been vapourised on the Somme. No escaping that.

>>2887201
Not-so-fun fact: One third of combat age males in France died during WW1.

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>>2887137

Indeed, the fact that there's no cause that I feel is worthy enough to pledge my life and sword to has brought me a great deal of shame.

For a while, I entertained the thought that /pol/ was onto something and that Donald Trump and MAGA might've finally been the one (or at least close), but it seems to have sputtered out. The man's just repeating the same crap as his predecessors with a slightly different spin on it.

>>2887210
even unfunner fact

68% of males born in the soviet union in 1923 were dead by 1946, half of those deaths happened before the war even began.

>>2887210
Holy shit

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>>2887192

>ywn be the Russian sniper who removes anonkommandant's brain from his head as punishment for his terrible crimes

Also, how many instances of German soldiers (SS in particular) having bastards with Jewish women are there? I read of one account of that happening post-war.

>>2887228
Holy shit no way.
>>2887220
lel

>>2887228
Yeah but they were commies so they're not even really people.

>>2887235
Not everyone in the USSR was a communist. Just like not everyone in the US is a dirty corporatist jew.

>>2887232
its discussed here, a couple of historians fact check a claim that 80% died and came up with these numbers and discuss why they were so high
http://downloads.bbc.co.uk/podcasts/radio4/moreorless/moreorless_20141213-0600d.mp3

Males born in the Soviet Union in 1923: 3,400,000
Infant (0-1) mortality: 800,000
Childhood (1-18) mortality, famine, and terror: 800,000
Surviving to 1941: 1,800,000
Wartime mortality: 700,000
Surviving to 1946: 1,100,000

>>2887194

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GQ1hNtR-xhg

>>2887192

>not realizing the war is lost and including Anne in a prisoner exchange so you claim you did one good deed at your war crimes trial or at the very least ensuring your Aryan bloodline continues on through the child

Do you even think ahead bro?

>>2887270
Why would the allies trade an actual soldier for some dumb girl?

>>2887286

>what are the White Buses

>>2887038
>joining an army that uses civilian planes as military aircraft

wew lad

>>2887216
Become a merc and get paid to fight isis and save historic sites and ME minority QT3.14s

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>>2887305

Really dude?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liaison_aircraft

>>2887307

I would except I don't know a damn word of Arabic or any other Middle Eastern language. Feel like I would be more of a burden than anything else.

Also, ISIS has CIA written all over them. If I'm gonna be going after anyone, it's their fucking handlers.

>>2887293
Done by neutral countries, and they only saved POW's of those same countries. They also didn't give any captured Germans back in exchange.

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>>2885557
>unregulated capitalism
>bad thing
Pic related is you in the background on the left

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>>2885909

How much money will it take to convince Livium to stop lurking and draw this greentext?

>>2885389
Just in time to serve valiantly in the Finno-Korean hyperwar.

>>2887319
>I would except I don't know a damn word of Arabic or any other Middle Eastern language
yeah such a shame these are magical alien languages that are impossible to learn

oh wait

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>I had finished between 1:30 am and 2 am and was then left to find my section, the Battalion now being in position. Copse Trench where we were to be, I found empty but just before daylight found my Company and section behind the front line parapet in shell holes and short shallow temporary trenches. Some of the fellows were digging themselves little funk holes. I chanced to ask Lieutenant Wardill what time zero was. He told me 7:30 am much to my surprise, as we expected to it to be just before dawn.

>Our bombardment started at 3:30 am and the big guns were certainly off it, mostly dropping in our own wire. The Germans soon replied and gave us probably better than we received. They seemed to know precisely where we were, for that "old gun" or guns from Gommecourt searched for us in and behind that front line most methodically. They dropped all around the lip of our shell hole, but never got one in but the sections on each side of us suffered severely. I got the bacon and as I was making my breakfast it was smothered in muck.

>At around 7:15 am I looked to see what the section on the right had done and saw the trench filled up with Wardill standing up dead and partially burned. Then I saw the first wave going over, so we got into the front line and followed at 7:25 am. I found Captain Colley in the fron bay and asked him the correct time, he pulled out his watch but could scarcely hold it, so shattered were his nerves. The poor fellow followed us all the same and was killed before he got very far. Our parapet was literally swept by machine gun and sharpnel fire and a large proportion only got a few yards.

>>2887678


>Previously the German bombardment of four hours had proved very deadly with section being wiped out almost completely. I was among the first of the wave to get over and I noticed Devey, now thought missing, was ahead of me and apparently off his head, for with his rifle slung and thumbs in arm pits he was just shouting and swearing. Tommy Webster followed me. I stumbled several times in our barbed wire, and cursed freely, but probably these stumbles saved my life time after time.

>Ahead I saw the first wave badly attenuated now but forming a well-dressed line lying down as near as safely could to our barrage. So Webster and I took cover in a shell hole about 20 yards behind. When the barrage lifted and first wave went forward I closed up and joined them. I have a recollection of Webster grinning at me with his face covered with blood.

>The din of machine guns all round us was infernal but of the deadly missiles themselves I was quite unconscious and the idea of getting killed never struck me at all. In taking cover in that shell hole half way over I became aware of a terrible dry throat so resorted to my water bottle. On arriving at the German wire I found it quite untouched in front of me, but seeing what appeared to be an opening on the right about 40 yards away I made for that. There I found a series of shell holes and destroyed it half way across, but the other half was impenetrable. I found some A Company machine gunners here with their Lewis's and also a few bombers. There were eight of us in all.

>>2887681


>The Germans were right on top of their parapets behind their wire, which was so thick it almost his them. They even brought up a machine gun there to face us. We made good rifle practice for a time accounting for several of them till they took more careful cover. One of our group was killed. One shot through the face and he bolted straight back for our lines with blood streaming through a ghastly hole in his cheek. I dont think he ever got back.

>Another fellow was shot later through the hand and one in the afternoon wounded in the forearm. I was not long before the German machine gun was apparently knocked out by one of our shells for it never fired afterwards. We were subjected to showers of stick grenades but they got none actually in our hole. Soon after arriving here I had to have another swig at my water. Never have I experienced such a parched mouth and throat.

>After we got over the Germans placed a fearful barrage of fire on our 1st and 2nd line preventing anyone else getting to us, only an odd man or two of the 3rd and 4th waves reached us. I looked back and saw our trench bridges flying hundreds of feet in the air. The enemy all afternoon were sweeping No Man's Land as near up their own line as they dared with shrapnel getting our fellows lying out in the open and even some us lying right in their wire. I dug a short trench of a few feet out of the crater we were in, into their wire, and this made nice cover for my head and body if I sat down.

>>2887683


>At first I kept a good look out for an attack from behind, but presently spent most of the afternoon dozing. The other fellows wanted to beat a retreat before dark and actually started out to do so in spite of my persuasion, for they feared being bombed out at dusk. They soon thought better of it however. A sniper only a few yards away but unseen actually called out 'Sheffield's pass us some water' and he was shooting our wounded too.

>The star shells had been going up for about a quarter of an hour when I left and I was the last. I should have stopped longer still but I saw a form creeping through the wire towards me. It was in all probability a German. I might have shot him easily but refrained just on the chance it might be one of our fellows

>I made tracks darting from shell hole to shell hole. In the 180 yards back by a judicious use of craters I think I did the odd eighty in the open. By waiting for a star shell to just go out and a burst of shrapnel to pass over then making another dart for cover I got back untouched, Our front lines were full of wounded fellowd. I helped a couple into the sap in Mark Copse and bound up their wounds. I then made tracks for Staff Copse. There were some ghastly messes in Cateau, forms in the bottom of the trench and several times in feeling if they were alive, my hand would be plunged into a gory mess of flesh, once the neck of a headless trunk. I encountered loose limbs too.

>I could get no water that night except a few drops that I found in bottles lying about. I slept in the open in Staff Copse that night and had a good rest. The Docter seemed hard at work all the time with a continuous stream of wounded coming in.

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>>2885411
>>2887022
>you die eventually so what does a couple of extra years with your family matter.
>you finish your meal eventually so what's the point in having desert.
>the films gonna end eventually so what does it matter if a guy leaves in the first 10 minutes.

fuck that shit every day is a little victory over death

>>2885562
>stage 4 cancer

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>>2887040
>touching

Not THAT kind of touching

>>2885909
>ywn be born in early XX century Germany
>ywn become a gestapo officer and sent to Netherlands
>ywn shoot on sight some jewish chick and a freak with pregnancy fetish

If i was born a century earlier I would have probably died and If i didn't i would live all my life in communism

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>>2888953

>ywn be born in early XX century United States
>ywn become an elite sharpshooter and paratrooper
>ywn be dropped into the Netherlands as part of Operation Market Garden
>ywn shoot Gestapoanon with your scope M1903 Springfield while he's preparing to execute an innocent pregnant girl

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>>2885909
>>2888982

Medal of Honor Frontline was my favorite game back in the day too.

Reading this greentext is reminding me of how I would spend hours operating innawoods with Cpl. Barnes in Rough Landing listening to that Dutch choir lady's beautiful voice.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54sSF5JS_HA

>>2885416
At least he can afford a 2006 Honda Civic under capitalism. Commies were lucky to get a 20-year-old Trabi after waiting longer than time since the car had been produced to get it.

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>>2885909

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>>2885909

>ywn bust your extra thick load into your beautiful, nearly ready to burst Anne, filling your sweet love oven with your seed
>extra thick

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Don't you worry, anons. Soon we'll all be drafted to fight in World War III, and we're gonna make some /his/ of our own.

>>2885379
saw the bayeux tapestry a day ago. It was far more impressive than I thought it would be and well worth the price of admission.

>>2885285
>tfw if I was born a century earlier I would have been a peasant until i died

>>2885378
>and can barely afford to buy a 2006 Honda civic

It's probably a better car than any shit you could've bought in the 50s. Saved yourself from huffing all that leaded gas while you're at it.

>>2887678
>>2887681
>>2887683
visited the somme yesterday
Source please

>>2885909
>>2889693

Posted this greentext in /co/'s Samurai Jack threads for lulz

>>/co/92865236
>>/co/92865334


Will report their reaction when they notice it

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>>2885378
Yes, but you are also vaccinated against terrible diseases that ravaged humanity for centuries and don't have to worry about invading armies raping your family to death before your eyes.

You will not die of some elementary shit like a peptic ulcer or a broken leg.

It's not that bad, man.

>>2890462

Fuck

>>/co92865236
>>/co92865334

>>2890498

How are they taking it?

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>>2891206

/co/ actually fucking likes it, they're already talking about putting a Samurai Jack spin on the Goku x Anne Frank fanfic.

Good God, I've created a monster.

>>2885909
>tfw you'll never save her in some sort of time machine

>>2891899

But would you pull a reverse Terminator by conceiving John Connor with her?

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>>2891899

How would one go about it though?

Just pluck Anne out of the attic or the train? Or some excessively extravagant plan involving unnecessary acts of bravado to impress her?

Personally to satiate my hero fantasies , I'd opt for the latter. Maybe go back in time and offer a group of world-renowned warriors (the 300 Spartans, Samurai, Teutonic Order, Apache, Winged Hussars, Continental Army, VMI Cadets at New Market etc.) the honor to prove themselves deserving of the nobility, courage, and virtue they are associated with by attacking the train and saving a poor innocent child from certain death. The ultimate triumph of the ancient traditions of honor and chivalry the Third Reich so readily discarded over the cruelty of modern despotism.

>>2890480
>don't have to worry about invading armies raping your family to death before your eyes

An American born a hundred years ago didn't have to worry about that either.

>>2887362
>>>/gulag/

>>2887669

Actually learning foreign languages past the age of 7 can be extremely difficult, especially if the person is monolingual and the written script is unintelligible from your native language.

t. Did it myself. Took over a decade of intense studying to speak with any degree of competency and still have terrible written grammar.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK11007/

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>Born 1896
>18 in 1914
>Hear the call to arms for the Empire
>join the Light horse Brigade
>bye mum
>train in Egypt, good fun, lots of prostitutes for my country virgin dick
>Mounted division gets deployed to Ottoman Syria
>Killed in the charge at Beersheba 1917
Didn't dog my mates tho

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>>2891985

>The ultimate triumph of the ancient traditions of honor and chivalry the Third Reich so readily discarded over the cruelty of modern despotism.

I like the way you think anon

>>2889396
MoH has such a great soundtrack

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>>2893542

Indeed it was.

I liked genuinely tragic undertones of the Market Garden segments. It made the tragedy of its failure hit that much harder. Something Call of Duty didn't really grasp until Hans Zimmer started writing their soundtracks.

>>2885370
The great depression is overrated.
My grandpa lived through the era, and his life barely changed. Sure they had a little less money, but it wasn't that noticeable.

>>2894369

*Meant to say Indeed it did.

>>2885411
hey man don't fuck cars, i don't care how great your relationship is with them.

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>>2885909

That's... Extremely creepy, yet beautifully written at the same time.

>>2885909

Wasn't this posted on imgur?

>>2885285
Quite a sad destiny tbqh.

>>2894379

Same desu

My family were educated professionals in California which wasn't hit nearly as badly as the East so we were unironically pretty /comfy/ during the Depression.

>>2885416
Somethin of an idiot this one

>>2885285
you could have enrolled in the army and fought in gulf war 1 and the Iraq war.

>>2894379
>>2894379
My gramps had eight houses at the beginning of the GD, and left it with one.

Still fairly rich though.

>>2896459
>8
thats pretty fucking impressive pre subburb pre mass construction/prefab, pre mass private car days
how many houses do you have?

>>2885433
you did not want to fight in the civil war. trust me

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>>2896614

DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO FANTASIZE ABOUT BOY

>>2896919
don't mind me, I've just your wifes slave boy cucking you while you die of infection from having your leg sawed off or crude shot making big holes in your gut, or maybe disantary from a camp full of diarrhea, bad water and fleas.
The whole town can hear her moans, making you the laughing stock of the neighbors.

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>>2885433
>tfw you will never serve under General Sherman towards the end of the war
>tfw you will never burn Atlanta to the ground
>tfw you will never lay waste to every city, town, and plantation on the way to Savannah with your regiment bros
>tfw you will never hunt down traitorous confederates in the Carolinas
>tfw you will never cheer and drink with your squad when you hear the war has ended
>tfw you will never weep with your squad when you hear that Lincoln was killed
>tfw you will never march on Washington with the rest of the Army of the Potomac, as General Grant looks on at you with a proud smirk
>tfw you will never go back to your home town and marry your highschool sweetheart, have 3 kids, and take over your old man's book store business
>tfw 50 years later, you will never get to lay down some sick banter on some old confederate veterans during a reunion

it hurts

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>>2897022

Oh you fucking nigger, you're in for it now.

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>>2897102

>le bernie bernie railroad man

Northerners can't even into proper idol

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>>2885378
>not buying a Honda Civic

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>>2885909

>ywn be that Allied sharpshooter
>mfw

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>>2885909

>wholly inappropriate subject matter
>extremely erotic
>somehow strikes a nerve with the deep and beauty intimacy

>>2897102
>tfw you will never be in the Army of the Ohio with your brother.
>tfw you will never fight in the bloody creeks of Shiloh.
>tfw you will never fight in the Battle of Perryville and hold the line against Bragg.
>tfw you will never be kinda pissed when your army is renamed Army of the Cumberland.
>tfw you will never fight in a string of bloody battles to the south of the Ohio river, all to protect your home just across that river.
>tfw you will never carry your brother from the battle to a defensive point at the fields of Chickamauga as the whole army routes around you while you and the rest of the Cumberland cover their retreat.
>tfw you will never listen to a rousing speech before the Battle of Chattanooga given by George H. "The Rock of Chickamauga" Thomas and Gordon Granger.
>tfw you will never be given the task of seizing the rifle pits at the base of Missionary Ridge.
>tfw you will never say "How about we go a little farther..." and follow Philip H. Sheridan up the ridge.
>tfw you will never take the ridge in a fit of battle rage only to find that you have routed the entire confederate center.
>tfw you will never stand at attention as General Grant angrily storms up to Granger and Thomas, demanding to know why you had disobeyed orders and charged up the ridge.
>tfw you will never feel the pride well up in your chest when Granger replies "Once those boys get started, all hell can't stop 'em."
>tfw you will never link up with the Army of the Potomac, the Army of the Tennessee, and the new Army of the Ohio and march into Virginia.
>tfw you will never hold back tears as you and the rest of the newly formed Army of Georgia watch as Lincoln's coffin is rolled past you.

File: Army of the Cumberland.jpg (2MB, 2000x1500px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 2000x1500px

>>2900650
>You will never return to Ohio with your brother, go back to working on ships and helping the sherif keep order in your town.
>tfw you will never marry the cute girl down the road and have two kids.
>tfw you will never watch your brother do the same.
>tfw you will never retire a barge captain and live out the rest of your life along side your family.
>tfw you live just long enough to see your son get married and have a son of his own.
>tfw you will never be buried on a ridge overlooking the Ohio river.

feels fucking terrible man

>>2885909

>ywn be the baby
>ywn be fed by Anne's Khazar milkers
>ywn have a rowdy childhood in the post-war Netherlands, going hunting for war relics with your classmates, finding everything from discarded helmets to fully functional rifles
>ywn cause your already emotionally damaged mother to suffer PTSD episodes by locking her in the closet as what you think is an innocent joke

>>2901639

>ywn come across her diary years later as an adult and finally realize why your mother was so terrified of enclosed spaces

Died of syphilis at 21.