*Record scratch* *Freeze frame* Yup, that's me. You're

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>>2318708
As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be an Emperor

Go on

West Roman Italy born and raised, as a slaver is how I spent most of my days.
Killin all da Gauls and raping all da fools and crucifying tribe leaders outside of da vestibule

When a couple a guys who were up to no good, started makin trouble in my neighborhoods
I got in one little fight and then I got dead so now I'm hailed as a hero but was really just a dreg.

Word.

Joy to the world!
The Cæsar's dead!
We barbequed his head!
What happened to his body?
We flushed it down the potty!

And round and round it goes
And round and round it goes...

>>2318791
You're thinking of Cicero.

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Praetorians proclaimed me
They tossed the purple on me
Though I ain't the sweetest bet for the throne

>>2318708
I was living the high life. Money, fame, ladies (and men) but felt that wasn't enough as I was clearing out barbarians from Iberia I looked at a statue and though

if only I can be the next Alex