Of all the jokes of history, is there any funnier than the

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>>2302928
They seemed a remarkably paper tiger when a serious land war broke out. During the Crimean War, the undistracted capabilities of the British Army amounted to 200,000 troops in Crimea. In WW1, they had France and Russia doing the majority of the fighting against the Central Powers, even though Germany was on-paper much weaker than Britain. In WW2, the Germans casually bitch-slapped them off the continent and the Japanese captured significant portions of their empire with a tertiary force on a shoestring budget, and it wasn't until they were infused with massive American assistance that they were able to score any notable land victories. Even then, the vast majority of heavy lifting was done by other countries.

>Be American Empire
>Be at absolute height of your power
>Lose to rice farmers in Vietnam
>Fail to defeat rice farmers in Korea
>Only beat rice farmers in Japan with a massive bomb

>American "Empire"
>no African territory

That's not an empire, it's a trade co-op with a military.

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>American ""empire""

good meme

>>2302944
this

>all of south/latin america as ours
i get the point but theres alot of pro vatnik governments there

There is no American Empire, please stop

>>2305032
hush now vladimir, go back to slep

>>2302928
The French Empire

>>2302944
>island country with mighty navy and massive trading posts around the world has small army

gee i wonder why

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>>2302928
British history is pretty funny as a whole

>>2305026
Monroe Doctrine is a meme.
From 1825 to 1945 the Royal Navy controlled the seas and protected South America's independence, not USA.

The British also invaded and blockaded Argentina after the Monroe Doctrine was proclaimed without the USA doing anything about it, and the French invaded Mexico and again USA did nothing.

USA only became capable of enforcing the Monroe Doctrine after 1945. And today with Trump in office I'm not sure it would be enforced.

>>2302944
Holy fuck you must be retarded. But i'm gonna seriously answer, because i am bored

>Crimean war
First war with telegraphs and shit, and a prime example of how logistics can fuck up your military. There were lot of misheard orders, badly delivered messages etc, which fucked up everything and not just for Brits, though it was most remarkable there. The casualties sustained there were just a byproduct of introducing a new system of leading war.

>WW1
Britain is a NAVAL power. It was doing NAVAL combat.

>WW2
...
i wanted to seriously answer, but this is just too retarded.

>>2305108
In WWI pretty much single handily starved the Germans into submission while still beating the Germans on the while the French were mutinying.

>>2302944
>britannia rules the waves
>royal navy gets btfo'd by japs using ww1 vintage boats and spends most of the war by being unable to sink one german battleship sitting in a fjord

>>2305108
>It was doing NAVAL combat.

So sailed around and did nothing while its German counterpart sat in harbor and rusted away?

>>2305120
The mate the German civilians just decided to stave themselves for a laugh

>>2302928
The fuck is that second pic supposed to illustrate?

>>2305098
1945 might be a little late.

>>2305208
1915 or 1916 would be more fitting desu.

>Iran
>American Empire
nigga what

>>2305108
>Britain is a NAVAL power. It was doing NAVAL combat.

That's the issue
Britain LARPed as a superpower when they were just a naval power useless on the land akin to the Dutch in the 17th century

>>2305285
Yeah because land is what connects all the continents and all the trade roads, controlling sea is basically useless amirite?

>>2305120
>>royal navy gets btfo'd by japs using ww1 vintage boats
But it was the Royal navy using vintage ww1 boats. Other than the Prince of Wales all the new ships were in the Atlantic or Mediterranean. There was also a severe shortage of aircraft and it was usually outdated.

>>2305302
If you're not marching 100s of thousands of men to their deaths to win 20 square miles of worthless land then you're a meme

>>2305285
The plan always was to get European countries to do the actual fighting, France just kept letting us down.

>>2305302
If only most of the world's resources, population, and arable land situated on some kind world island formed from 2 massive continents trying to become a supercontinent or something.

>>2305377
France basically stood alone on the Western Front against numerically superior Germans until late 1916
It's pathetic that a country that called itself a superpower couldnt fully take part in a war it had joined until two years had passed

Britain was never a superpower like America is right now
That's the sad truth

>>2305406
French believed in that Britain would actually help them and paid the price for that mistake.

Of course they didn't learn anything from it and made the exact same mistake during the 2nd kraut chimpout.

>>2305406
Except ofcouse almost single handily starving the Germans of supplied and beating the Germans on land when Kitchener's army arrived, Just because the French are retarded enough to march endless waves of men towards German machine guns doesn't mean you're anymore noble or brave it just means you're morons that got bled white.

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>>2305406
>Britain was never a superpower like America is right now
Totally. I mean, why didn't Rome just nuke Carthage while we're at it?

I wish flags existed on /his/ so we could see how your country compares to this rainy piece of shit island in terms of how much we've influenced the world.

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>>2305420
What a bunch of naive fucks
How could they do such a mistake after a millenium of dealing with perfudous albion

>>2305432
>beating the Germans on land when Kitchener's army arrived

That is funny way to spell "committed treason and fraternized with the enemy in masses".

>>2305447
That happened in 1914 and the French did it too. Dumb Yank.

>>2305445
One really shouldn't ally with a nation lead by krauts and kraut sympathizers when the enemy you're expecting to fight against is Germany.

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>>2305032
There was; it was diagnosed with terminal cancer on September 11th 2001 and passed away on December 18th, 2011

>>2305469
How come only the Irish realize that the eternal Anglo and the eternal Teuton are one in the same?

>>2305445
>this is what frogs actually believe

Just because your retarded commanded ordered your men to endlessly walk into machine gun fire at Verdun doesn't mean you did more to win the war, you don't win the war by catching German bullets Muhammad.

>>2305120
>spends most of the war by being unable to sink one german battleship sitting in a fjord
by that point it was the only significant naval unit in europe that the british hadnt either sunk or had surrender to them, or otherwise rendered hors de combat

>>2306285
>Alexander the Great
Absolutely conquered them, then the Bactrian state withered away
>Mughal Empire
Really, Afghanistan defeated the Mughal empire?

>>2302928
the american empire wouldn't exist with the eternal anglo

>>2306285

there never was an american empire you cynical faggot

>>2302928
The American Empire is the continuation of the British Empire, dumbass.

>>2302945
We didn't lose, we pulled out.
The Vietnamese lost.

>>2306510
It's just a term used because of America's power, land, and influence putting it on the equivalent level of many Empires of old.

>>2306574

america's land hasn't changed since the 19th century

>>2306546

>we pulled out

because you didn't win.

the US intervened to prop up the south vietnamese government. it failed to do so and gave up

>>2302944
You seem to have a clear bias against Britain

>>2306679
We pulled out because of hippies.

>>2306773
Losing a domestic political conflict against bunch of LSD addicted STDs cesspits is even worse than losing a military one against bunch of zipperheads armed with AKs.

>>2306785
^this

>>2302944
Please shut the fuck up, while Britain was somewhat succesfully fighting a war thousands of Kilometres away from home with it's tiny ass domestic army utilizing new crude telegraph technology your country was spending 5 years and hundreds of thousands of men and equipment failing to suppress a riot of inbred rednecks.

>>>2306304
>high level of discourse
Oh well, why bother, he's an anglo.

>>2306975
>literally typing in English

>>2307188
>in American

Ftfy

test

>>2307193
>America is literally an English colony
Fuck off, German diaspora.
America is British, culturally, linguistically, and racially. Or, at least, we have the largest minority, at something like 20%.

t. proud English diaspora

>>2306844
Large-scale exposure to the horrors and trials of modern war during America's Civil War ensured the country was better prepared both militarily and strategically for it than anywhere in continental Europe.

>>2302928
>larping americans pretend they had an empire too

Oh my

>>2306546
lol

>>2307303
You have no idea what you're talking about

The civil war was a backwards war

>>2307303
I can only imagine how hard the American army would've been mopped-the-floor with if it had to fight a war with a European army given how hard-fucked it got by a pack of inbred rednecks using an army supplemented by Europeans and niggers.

>>2302928
>American empire
More like american hegemony

>>2306491
Mughal Empire started from Afghanistan.

>>2305368
Yeah, so another proof the British empire was actually weak as fuck ?

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>>2302928

It makes me laugh how salty the Yanks and Frogs on this board are about the British Empire.

Suck it up, lads.

>>2302945
>Be British Empire
>Have modern army with cannons, cavalry and gatling guns
>Lose to bunch of niggers from Africa, armed with spears and straw shields

>>2302928
>Eritrea

>part of the british empire

What

>>2306679
Nixon managed to end the war with an independent South Vietnam. The Democratic Congress under Ford however cast South Vietnam aside

It was a cut your nose to spite your face moment

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>>2302945
>Be America
>Be at absolute height of power
>The literal pinnacle of military and economic power
>defeat communist the only other super power in history
>19 Pakis inflict more psychological damage than the entire Japanese fleet
History is the most simultaneously retarded and epic story.

>>2308402
Not all Yanks.

>>2306785
you literally can't be addicted to lsd
that's not a thing

>>2307233
that's dumb

>>2308869
It's true.

>>2308874
not really. america and britain are really only superficially similar in terms of culture and linguistics. same goes with race, as pretty much every american that can trace their blood back to english colonists can also find natives, and/or later immigrants (like polacks or irish) in their ancestory.

>>2308897
All Brits are genetically similar enough that, if you teach 'em English, their kids'll be English.

And no, our cultures are not only superficially similar.
Maine culture, for example, is probably closer to English culture than to, say, Texan culture.

>>2302945
>Only beat rice farmers in Japan with a massive bomb

Not true, America had already won and was firebombing the shit out of Japan. The nukes were because
>didn't want to engage in a potentially costly and drawn-out land war
>wanted to brag to the rest of the world that America had nukes

>>2302945
Also lost to China

>>2306510
Of course the US are an empire
-leading military
-most important currency
-dominant language
-dominant culture
-vassal states
-biggest economy
- and of course they are the good guys and morally superior.

Their enemies are always evil, barbarians and/or terrorists

>>2308032
>>2308047
>I don't have a single fact or argument to back up my claims but I need to tell you how triggered I am

Gotcha.

>>2306699
What you have done there is describe 95% of /his/ no other country on this board can extract salt on such a level as Britain.

>>2308384
Are you retarded?

>>2309203
If you need to engage in a costly and drawn-out land war then you're not winning.

>>2306304
>a Brit using Muhammad to refer to French people

is this bait?

>>2308858
But you literally can. It's just psychological dependence, not physical.

>>2310391
US

>>2311710
France has a higher muslim population than Britain. He could also be from Scotland or Wales.

NATO is essentially the Delian League in a modernized form. All the other members rely on the US militarily, USA exercises authority throughout its sphere.

While previous administrations were content with the mere fact of submission, Trump has been calling for the allies to pay tribute for their protection. Could this cause the EU to become comparable to the Peloponnesian League?

>>2311710
>French soldier literally stabbed today by a muzzie

lmao, France is a mess

Why is /his/ so eternally salty about the British?

>>2306285
>December 18th, 2011
What happened here?

>>2312089
Iraq withdrawal

>>2305432
>The United "the somme" Kingdom is complaining about other nations having costly offensive tactics
honhonhon, at least France didn't take 6,0000 casualties to 12,000 enemy casualties while her ally did most of the work like the British did at the Somme on the first day

>>2306655
And?