Back in the day, how exactly did you get a wife? From my understanding

>>1500278
Familial connections, courting, growing up together, etc.

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>>1500278
getting a wife is the way for robots and chads to think that they are relevant. those twats even believe that they have to protect their family so that they can feel dutiful.

>>1500282

so you basically were limited to women your family knew or who you grew up with?

It would have been a very small pool of potential wives then

>>1500293
>It would have been a very small pool of potential wives then
Thems the breaks. It wasn't even 40 years ago when most people were marrying those in close proximity to them. People meeting marriage candidates that are long distances from them is a relatively recent phenomenon. They obviously got farther as time went on (even quicker for those with money and connections), but mostly you'd marry Jane down the street, Julie from the next town over or Wendy you met while in the service/on holiday.

>>1500278
It was generally a communal thing. Families helped set couples together based on the perception of collective good, for both families of for the greater community. Courtship isn't traditional, it's just the 19th century analogue to dating.

Remember that both villages and cities involved the same people living in the same place for most of their lives. Being a busybody was often necessary for a community to function smoothly.

The advent of capitalism essentially turned every man into his own maker, eroding the social aspects of match-making and promoting independent courtship. Charisma and seduction, skills once only necessary for illegitimate pursuits, became necessary for a man to find a partner.

>>1500291
That's really sad

>>1500293
Right. If anything, this was good for autists and uglies.

>>1500278
>how exactly did you get a wife?
you could be betrothed at young age

or if you live in a commune/village, they often had festivals with dancing so that young people could mingle around and maybe have a quickie behind the barn in the bushes

When you express your wish to start the whole marriage thing you appoint special people who would be intermediates in the matter

Bride's parents and your parents negotiate things like dowry and stuff like that

Or you can just kidnap your bride from other village:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bride_kidnapping

back in the day, meaning?

my grandpa heard my granny in the room next to him, asked the landlord who that was, next time she came around asked for a date
then asked her to be his wife

you manned up and women gave you an answer

>>1500278
Every time you read about "Courting", that's dating, they just didn't give it official relationship status.

It's the same as going on a few dates with a girl but you aren't in a relationship yet.

>>1500278
>Back in the day
What the fuck does that mean?

>>1500591
My grandpa met my grandma at a Church dance, got the ok from her father that he was a decent guy with a good job, and then they started dating.

You forget nowadays how incredibly important it was to have a partner who was stable and not a complete asshole, because a bad marriage irredeemably fucked up your life.

>>1500606

>
You forget nowadays how incredibly important it was to have a partner who was stable and not a complete asshole, because a bad marriage irredeemably fucked up your life.

What? Both of my grandparents on my mother's side were previously married, with children. This was in the 50s.

Go watch a Golden Age romantic comedy. Any of them. Observe how the characters behave. That's a reflection of the contemporary social reality.

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>>1500278
If we're talking pre-modern times which is 1800s and earlier.

1.Betrothals, both men and women. Your parents, or uncle/auntie/grandpa/grandma would find a women who they deem a suitable wife for you and you get in an arranged marriage. This usually happens from 13-18 years old.

2.You would approach a woman that you know or her parents and ask to marry her. They'll have to do a background check on you and make sure you're a reliable person to marry their daughter.

3. You grew up together, you were neighbours and friends for a long time, and when you come of age it just naturally occurs to you to marry her.

4. Wedlock. You impregnated a woman somehow, and unlike some scumbags, you decide to stick around, so eventually you'd be pressured by her parents or other people to marry her.


Keep in mind that most people prior to industrial revolution lived in farming villages or small towns. So you'll have very limited options in deciding your marriage partners.

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>>1500278
Well...

>>1500645
Pretty sure arranged marriages were not condoned by the Church except for aristocrats.

>>1500667
Arranged marriages were pretty popular in most of the world back then, such as China, India, Persia, Japan, Arabia, etc.

>>1500305
in my country until 1968 it was literally illegal for a man and a woman to live together unless they were married. This is in the middle of europe.

> It wasn't even 40 years ago when most people were marrying those in close proximity to them. People meeting marriage candidates that are long distances from them is a relatively recent phenomenon.
This has not arrived in the rural parts of here yet.