guys I'm having a really hard time learning to program.

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guys I'm having a really hard time learning to program. I just want to make a quick and easy game like flappy bird and then either make it cost 99 cents or maybe introduce microtransactions and a crate system to keep people buying and keep myself from being a wage slave any longer. I've read up a lot on python and c, but any of the free tutorials online are garbage and suddenly show you a bunch of new shit without ever telling you what any of it means. I don't even know how I would make an actual game and it feels like I'll never get to the point where there are actual pictures on a screen that are moving around. None of it makes any sense. I already installed unity and python and tried fucking around but it all seems so far fetched right now.

I just dont want to be a wageslave anymore /g/. I'm already disabled but the ssa won't label me so because I can still walk and talk to people, they just keep telling me to get a normie job. I don't want to live like this. I actually was pointing a gun at my own head a few weeks ago and the only thing that stopped me was I really wanted some potato soup and wanted to get to the next part in skyrim. I can't fucking do this anymore I don't understand.I don't know what to do.