WE DID IT REDDIT

File: 1501930807234.jpg (2MB, 5000x5000px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 5000x5000px

>buyers are now left with a useless product since it can only use the now deprecated proprietary juice bags

>>62203890
And that completes the scam.
The owners are left with a $600-$400 brick that can connect to the internet.
Meanwhile the maker leave the scene rich and laughing their asses to the hipsters.
I wish I could be such immoral bastard. I blame my mum. She rose me with way too unbalanced (to the good) moral code.

>>62204051
>i'm very good and would do no harm to anybody, anyone notice me yet?
why did you even bother typing out that reddit shit

Press L to laugh at retarded buyers

File: leonard.jpg (24KB, 515x375px) Image search: [Google]

24KB, 515x375px

>the company was hailed by tech investors, ...

"hailed" as what? fucking tech """"""""""journalism"""""""""" is even worse than sports

>>62204051
so fucking much, I look at shady private equity groups making obscene amounts of money but balk at the idea of openly ripping people off

File: 1497987215125.png (509KB, 454x642px) Image search: [Google]

509KB, 454x642px

>>62203890
That shit should have never left the concept stage. However, at least it existed for our lulz.

How many units did they sell?

File: bird poop girl.jpg (28KB, 318x216px) Image search: [Google]

28KB, 318x216px

refunds when?

File: newspaper-crisis-averted-24356172.jpg (32KB, 400x267px) Image search: [Google]

32KB, 400x267px

>>62203890
This is a win for digital consumer rights. Were this product to become profitable, it would signal to other companies that this direction is okay and would open up a new Pandora's box by the likes of which we've never seen before.

>spend $700 on a juicer
>company shuts down
>now have $700 paperweight
FUCK REEEEEEEEEE

At least it wasnt the startup that gave you 25 usd in quarters for only 27 dollars.

File: centrifugal-juicers.jpg (165KB, 1500x1500px) Image search: [Google]

165KB, 1500x1500px

You can get a quality DRM-free juicer for only $69.99 and supply it with cheaper fruits and veggies from your local grocery store.

>>62204142

what

explain this insanity

>>62204042
Don't worry I'm sure there will be a reddit posting on alternative uses titled: "Your money isn't wasted, alternative uses for the Juicero!"

>>62204174
Or you can get /fit/ for free doing nothing but body exercises and then squeeze fruits with your bare hands

File: 1483149712542.jpg (45KB, 350x459px) Image search: [Google]

45KB, 350x459px

>>62203890
>mfw people bought a proprietary juice press

>>62204196
The dick in a vice guy already modified one to press stuff on demand. He just removed the DRM parts and installed a couple of switches to operate the motors.

File: Palp_trustme.jpg (180KB, 1529x1200px) Image search: [Google]

180KB, 1529x1200px

>he hasn't created his own pump-and-dump start up
What's the problem /g/? Do you hate making millions of dollars?

>>62204051
>The owners are left with a $600-$400 brick that can connect to the internet.

Except they are being offered a refund for the machine.

>>62204275
Yeah, but you know people are going to be dumping these expensive juicers for nothing because they aren't going to bother with it. Cheap quality juicer for me

File: 1501122059935.jpg (37KB, 500x375px) Image search: [Google]

37KB, 500x375px

>>62204097

Imagine when people figure out they can run the contents of a k-cup though a 10 dollar coffee machine.

>>62204174
>DRM-free
that's nice and all but you can call me back when it's open source as well

>>62204097
Going on now. https://www.juicero.com/company-news/

>For the next 90 days, we are offering refunds for your purchase of the Juicero Press. Please contact [email protected] by December 1, 2017 to request a refund for your purchase. If you have an active Pack subscription, you will receive your final delivery next week (week of September 4th).

File: 1309349843466.gif (27KB, 150x150px) Image search: [Google]

27KB, 150x150px

>>62204339
The money is gone.
They will file bankruptcy protection within days.
The refund pledge is as empty as their corporate bank account.

>>62203890
Surprisingly, the thing is actually really well made and contains top quality parts (massive overkill for the purpose in fact) with excellent construction.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Cp-BGQfpHQ

>>62203890
It is honestly the worst idea I've ever seen get as far as it did. How the FUCK did a million of them get sold?

>>62204051
>>62203890
the juicero is made extremly well though....

>>62204445
A million juice packs NOT actual presses.
Either way it is surprisingly high but then again so is the hipster population.

>>62204405
Wasn't the entire thing just a gigantic money laundering operation?

>>62204051
Wrong. They lost money on each machine. It was overengineered, look at some breakdown videos.

>>62204391
Eat the fruit instead of juicing it

>>62204051
>>62203890
This was totally a covert way of smuggling money, prove me wrong

where can I buy my juice bags now? hello???

>>62204488
This, the money was in the juice pouches

>>62204488
Engineers made money, ceo made money, janitor made money even investors made money because they were diversified and failures were expected and outclassed by successes.

>>62204485
Given >>62204458
it probably bankrolled a high tech manufacturing plant owned by one of the unicorn investors (probably Alphabet Inc.).
If the thing works you are in the profit if not at least all the money went to your brand new plant capable of making other product complete paid by the Juicero pre-orders and zero liability because its relation to Juicero is as supplier.

>>62204543
they just wanted to make Netflix subscription model would work with juice memes. The failur is that their juice was a slushy pre blanded not even diced fruit,making a press useless.

>>62204505
I have two juicy bags in my pants, hun. Wanna squeeze them out?

>>62204696
What flavor?

>>62204705
What flavour do you want?

File: d518377976d0eafdd90eb53fc0629064--laundry-tubs-laundry-room-sink.jpg (13KB, 236x230px) Image search: [Google]

13KB, 236x230px

>>62204391
here ya go bro

File: efe243.png (46KB, 896x208px) Image search: [Google]

46KB, 896x208px

>As we enter this new chapter

>>62205477
>Chapter 11
ftfy

>>62204247
>doing exercises when you can get fit squeezing fruits with your bare hands.

File: 23249245.jpg (10KB, 184x184px) Image search: [Google]

10KB, 184x184px

Now it's the glorified $400 paperweight that everybody who bought one really deserves

>>62205477
>Chapter 7

>>62204247
That might increase your grip strength or give you a hand injury. but that's it.

>>62205500
They filed for chapter 7 which is liquidate assets, shut it down and debtors get to pick over the corpse.

File: 1391171674021.gif (1MB, 170x180px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 170x180px

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1oHp-VvhDE

>>62204275
yes, and if I recall, uncle bumblefuck also had to drill a bunch of holes to even get it to work after the fact, plus he had to hold the bag in place while it was being pressed.

>>62204139
That's the "I'm a fucking idiot" tax. Jesus Christ just buy some fucking juice, or actually juice fruit yourself.

File: 10954640_907887615928414_1967249163_n.jpg (68KB, 640x640px) Image search: [Google]

68KB, 640x640px

>>62205500
>>62205571

>>62204071
F

File: unixway.jpg (44KB, 800x800px) Image search: [Google]

44KB, 800x800px

>>62204391
Open-source and following the Unix way.

>>62203890
obligatory video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlVmppyflS0

>>62205904
Its beautiful, but this is the most complicated route they could have taken to squeeze a bag.

File: 1377266838715.png (34KB, 476x539px) Image search: [Google]

34KB, 476x539px

After use you were supposed to
>cut open each pack
>clean out the crap inside
>rinse it out thoroughly
>pack it into a box
>store box until box is full of empty juice packs
>print shipping label
>send it back to juicero for recycling

>If your company is hiring and has interest in talking with any of our employees, please contact us at [email protected].
kek. as if someone in their right mind would ever want to employ a bunch of millennials that over"engineer" something that has a simple task and lock it down without considering the implications of it. i would rather shot myself in the foot instead

>>62205121
>the current state of linoocks

>>62204436
Incredible.

File: 478x640_ac.jpg (69KB, 478x640px) Image search: [Google]

69KB, 478x640px

>>62204253
>WILLINGLY falling for the proprietary food meme

fucking normies

>>62206411
These are such a insane environmental waste. I asked my recycling center if they even can recycle them and they said no. Not sure if it's cost or what but they just go straight to the landfill.

File: face honk90890.jpg (193KB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [Google]

193KB, 1920x1080px

>>62206411
Soon we will be licensing everything in our kitchens. The internet of things meme is going to ruin everything.

>mfw capitalism will have abandoned the concept of personal property altogether by the end of the century because of how profitable the rents for these types of devices are

>>62203890
Daily reminder that if you unironically hate this then you are literally pleddit. Think of all the engineers that are now out of work and all the profit that went to waste. Trump needs to do something about this.

File: 1484989710190.gif (970KB, 400x275px) Image search: [Google]

970KB, 400x275px

>>62207156
Capitalists have killed capitalism by failing to recognize how scale affects freedom of choice.
They are still using physical good analogies in the age where most "value" is totally arbitrary.

File: hulkamani.jpg (18KB, 375x375px) Image search: [Google]

18KB, 375x375px

>>62204247
This.
Farming with your fists and your thighs.
Fuck juicers, PUNCH YOUR FRUIT TO PULP, SQUEEZE EVERY LAST INCH OF LIFE OUT OF HIM BROTHER

>>62204042

no, they have a 90 day return period

>>62207232
>Think of all the engineers that are now out of work and all the profit that went to waste.
They deserve it for creating $1000 bag squeezer.

>>62206411
Bruh, I have one and I just use my own coffee with a little custom cup...

>>62204696
Are you sure you want to offer them up for the Jucerio?

>>62205976
No clean up required!

>implying there aren't 900,000 empty packs in landfill

File: 1484401723374.png (300KB, 352x500px) Image search: [Google]

300KB, 352x500px

>company builds a juice press
>the actual goal was to squeeze money out of their customers

Ooooh, the irony!

>>62207000
>I asked my recycling center if they even can recycle them and they said no. Not sure if it's cost or what but they just go straight to the landfill.
Plastic combined with foil. Whenever you see that, it's something that won't be recycled.

>>62207318
The second generation of Keurig machines literally have DRM that scans for Official™ Keurig™ K™-Cups™ barcodes. You have to hack the machine and potentially void your warranty if you don't want to use branded cups.

Still though, if you're using the 1.0 machine, why wouldn't you just buy a regular pot? Same shit really.

>>62207740
>The second generation of Keurig machines literally have DRM that scans for Official™ Keurig™ K™-Cups™ barcodes. You have to hack the machine and potentially void your warranty if you don't want to use branded cups.

Shit like this should be illegal.

>>62207759
You fucking leftist commie! This is free market at work!

>>62204051
No it's because you have no connections.

>>62204042
>deprecated proprietary juice bags
kek

>>62207717
I see, so if you separated them it should be ok? I haven't tried it but how hard is it to do on those cups?

First time I'm seeing this and holy shit this is some bugman-tier level of bugmanshit.

>>62205885
But is it POSIX compliant?

Just chop the fruit and put it in a blender with some water. Are Americans really so lazy they can't even make juice without Internet connected devices?

>>62207232
>being so much of a cuck as to willingly working on a project like this

>>62203890
UPDOOT

File: bernanke-tll-the-system-you-20-000-to-to-eat-that-27054902.png (133KB, 500x397px) Image search: [Google]

133KB, 500x397px

But think how much this stimulated the economy, all the engineers that had to be hired to design it, the machinists that made the parts, the infrastructure for pulping the fruits and delivering.

>>62207865
i can't wait to get an internet enabled toothbrush, to be quite honest with you, family. /s

>>62204174
>Centrifugal juicer
kek, try a masticating juicer.

>>62207918
PLEASE REPLACE SALIVA CANISTER

>>62204275
>dick in a vice
wut

>>62207782
It's actually the opposite, lol.

>>62204275
Vise*

>>62204353
and what will you put into it genius? your dick?

>>62208047
It only stops being free market if government sends thugs to stop you from using the device in a way it thinks you shouldn't be using it.
If you agree to buy a coffee maker that only allows Koffee™ Pakkets™, it's your fault and free market is laughing at your misery.

>>62208060
Vase*

>>62207825
connections to what? a Chinese engineering firm?

literally pick up the phone, dial 0, and ask for an engineer.

>>62208091
Vape*

File: latest[1].png (295KB, 374x529px) Image search: [Google]

295KB, 374x529px

>>62208091
Alex Vause*

>>62207740
>You have to hack the machine and potentially void your warranty
All you needed was a little plastic clip that some 3rd party gave away so you could use their unauthorized pods.

>>62207759
>Shit like this should be illegal.
Nobody forced you to buy it.

>>62207517
>>62207000
I'm in favor of taxing shit like this. This is unacceptable in modern society. Also lefties that complain about energy sources are more likely to own these and toss the consumables without hesitation.

>>62207840
Hard. I keep the grounds, clean the cup and put it with my special pile of plastic too special for the regular pickup (#7 iirc). I just toss the foil, it's almost impossible to separate, and I've tried.

>>62204042
>deprecated proprietary juice bags
this is a real thing

>>62207883

Honestly when mothers are offered a toothbrush that shows them when kids brush their teeth on a website it'll sell like hotcakes.

>>62208168
But only if they have paid their $10 monthly connection fee ($20 if you are using the LTE version.)

>>62208108
3dpd

>>62208188

"It's just $10 a month to save thousands on my child's dental work"

File: 1487594388784.jpg (84KB, 700x700px) Image search: [Google]

84KB, 700x700px

>>62207156
>Year is 2025
>Poor
>10 year old toaster machine from 2015 suddenly breaks on me
>Save a few shekels from my mcjob to buy a new one
>Head to The Toaster Store©
>Bright spotlights everywhere
>Random hipsters gathered around the deluxe models, toasting things.
>People having their toasters repaired at the Toaster Genius Bar.©
>Fuck this, I just want a normal fucking toaster
>iToast™ representative walks up to me
>"Can I help you with anything today sir?"
>"Y-yeah I'm looking for a new toaster"
>iToast™ rep points me to their latest premium model.
>"This beauty comes 6 new burn models, temperature scale accurate to 0.00002 degrees, 9K LCXD HD Screen, timer, clock, weather app, email sender, 12 different modes of operation..."
>"H-how much is it?"
>"$899.99. but only $499.99 with a 12 year lease."
>"D-do you have anything a bit cheaper?"
>Rep's eye light up
>"You're in luck, we just introduced our new rent2toast plans at at the 2025 Toast conference"
>"Our basic model here only costs $50 and with a $17.99 monthly subscription to iToast™, you only have to pay $0.50 per slice and $1.29 per bagel.
>No choice, have to buy the rent2toast toaster.
>Head home.
>Swipe creditcard on the toaster
>Deposit 2 credits
>Finally able to make toast
>Try to open fridge to grab condiments
>"Sorry but you do not have enough credits in your rent2eat™ refrigerator™, please insert more credits or upgrade to our condiment subscription."
>mfw this is the future dumb normies chose for us

>>62208168
>helicopter parents want this
>new generation will have existed under permanent, pervasive surveillance
Time to go full Kaczynski

>>62204081
lol

>>62208223
>owning appliances with electronic parts
I'll cling to my "inefficient" completely analog appliances, thank you. It'll be easy enough to figure out repairs.

>>62208223
Don't forget
>if you make your own toaster iToast will sue you for denying them profit

>>62208168
Kids will easily outsmart this. They'll just set up a cron job or do a replay attack if it's a more sophisticated model.

>>62208337
Then just sell it mostly to black mothers

>>62208223
I'd honestly just toast my bread on a gas grill instead.

>>62208388
if black kids can invent computers at age 11 in 2015, they an bypass toothbrushes in 2025

>>62204253
>god bless level1techs

>>62208510
Gas will be banned because muh climate crisis. You will have to use a makeshift solar oven. Good luck with the clouds.

>>62208599
I'll find a way. Even if I need to build a toaster myself.

>>62208668
Copper rationing prevents this. If you are caught without a license you have a minimum 5 years imprisonment.

>>62208599
What if I toasted my bread using an electric stove?

>>62207964
AvE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Cp-BGQfpHQ

>>62208706
I'll find a way.

>>62208564
I sometimes go to sleep while playing their news videos as background noise. Pretty comfy

>>62208743
Uh, that's not allowed because it breaks the meme RP thing

File: 1469517477957_zpsjagrnk39.jpg (21KB, 400x325px) Image search: [Google]

21KB, 400x325px

>>62203890
LAWD IS THAT A FUCKING APPLE SERVER IN A JUICER

>>62204051
>I wish I could be such immoral bastard.

Fortunately there is a tutorial available!

https://matt.sh/anatomy-of-a-fraud
https://matt.sh/startup-books-a-rage-review

>>62204071
L

>>62207265
That only applies to the juice packs, not the machine.

>>62208961
Fug. So stoves don't require credits to be deposited.

File: best tech.jpg (55KB, 475x377px) Image search: [Google]

55KB, 475x377px

>>62208223
or....
> wait for grandparents to die
> inherit their 50+ year old toaster
> perfect toast in 30 - 45 seconds
> more chrome than any modern car
> almost no plastic in its construction
> no fucking circuit boards
> will be around long after we're all dead
These can also be found at your local thrift store for ~ $5

https://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_from=R40&_trksid=p2380057.m570.l1313.TR6.TRC1.A0.H0.Xjuicero.TRS0&_nkw=juicero&_sacat=0

File: smug.jpg (69KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

69KB, 500x500px

>>62204142
>>62204179
Sounds like the use it to game the credit card rewards system meme. 80 dollars for 1000 flyer miles for example. ez.

>>62209200
Get any other best tech?

>>62204275
I saw a teardown of one of these things on jewtube. It uses high quality custom machined parts throughout.

Lots of hipsters are going to be dumping these things. Might be able to find one for cheap or free.

File: 1477797112365.jpg (19KB, 222x293px) Image search: [Google]

19KB, 222x293px

>>62204071
L

>>62204071
LL
LL
LL
LL
LLLLLLLL

>>62209246
as far as appliances, no
most of my appliances contain some form of pointless electronic wank.
Zippo lighter might count as best tech

File: juicero new.png (59KB, 972x205px) Image search: [Google]

59KB, 972x205px

>>62209218
Nice

File: old fan.jpg (78KB, 845x475px) Image search: [Google]

78KB, 845x475px

>>62209246
Just thought of one.
> 60+ year old Fasco electric fan
> quieter than a Dyson
> moves more air than a Dyson
> almost no plastic in its construction (weights 10 lbs)
> no fucking circuit boards
> will continue running long after we're all dead
Mind you, the blades are metal, and the grill doesn't do much, but dangerous stuff is good. Keeps you alert....

File: old fan2.jpg (129KB, 475x845px) Image search: [Google]

129KB, 475x845px

>>62209411
rotated

>>62209411
>>62209422
nice fan you got there nigger

>>62209422
I lost my father to one of those, please delete this.

>>62209411
Take the grate off and you can cut trees down with that thing. These designs were taken off the market for safety reasons, not because they weren't effective. Still, I wish we had the choice.

>>62203890
I think this speaks volumes about novelty, and how detached those corporate CEOs are from the general public (especially those struggling to make it paycheck to paycheck)

how many juicers did they manage to sell anyway?

File: 1504321833476.jpg (127KB, 840x472px) Image search: [Google]

127KB, 840x472px

>>62209422
rotated

File: 1504321833476.jpg (69KB, 475x840px) Image search: [Google]

69KB, 475x840px

>>62209528
rotated

>>62209036
That's a good way to get yourself tortured and/or killed. Good luck to those who try, though

>>62208223

Honestly, if I was forced to use one of those products, I'd just remove the microchip and fix it up to toast anything I put in there.

File: 3213216576.png (6KB, 333x293px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 333x293px

>>62203890
>700burgers + daily price for proprietary bags of fruit and vegetables vs a 30dollar blender

>>62204042
You could save it for a while and then sell it to a collector or some museum or whatever. It's a machine with a story to tell.

>>62209666
>"By opening up this toaster, you are in violation of the TOASTER CORP contractual license and terms of service. The police have been called and are on their way."