>wake up at 6am like a fuckin champ >roll over to my humble

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>wake up at 6am like a fuckin champ
>roll over to my humble battlestation
>move the mouse cursor to where chrome used to be
>except now RAM is so freed up the cursor is ahead of me and gets there in the future
>open Vivaldi, spend a good minute enthralled by its slick ass interface
>with my personalised mouse gesture a single feign of my hand makes the browser summon up 4chan, check the weather, download a new Jordan Peterson lecture, hack my work database to complete my work for me with some overtime and call up my big tittied maid to bring me some cocktails, all ending with my hand in the position to start my morning fap
>check my protonmail, my personal Swiss mail machine performs its state-of-art decryption to deliver a message from my boss, he's giving me the 27th salary rise of this week
>As an intellectual my curiosity is suddenly sparked by quantum nanotechnology and the fate of the universe, within seconds StartPage has found a search result truly fitted for my inquiry, not modified by any censorship or shilling
>After mastering the culmination of human knowledge on said topics I decide to give myself some light entertainment so I had over to watch the last World Championship chess game on v̶i̶m̶e̶o̶ ebaumsworld
>hit up my non-tracking file cloud, my bitch set me 2 pics of her tits (they don't fit in one) and my homie sent me some fucking decent artwork which refined tastes like mine appreciate

My life is fucking awesome.
Have you gone google-free yet /g/?