>It says here you have no work experience. >Why should

>>61254778
I know how to efficiently shitpost on /g/ by maximizing the amount of (You)'s.

You shouldn't but I'll scream inequality if you dont

Ill work for less money because i have no idea what this job is worth.

>>61254778
Because you're a good boy.

>>61254778
I'll give you access to my NAS full of doujins.

I have tits and a vagina.

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I'll suck yo' dick.

>>61254778
because I've installed gentoo

why not mate, it'll be a good time i swear it

I must survive capitalism

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>>61254852
Sir, Can you go with me?

>>61254778
Because that's lying to you.

>>61254778
Well if you would have looked at my github page, you'd have seen I've spent much of my free time working on programming projects, some of which directly showcase the skills that were listed as requirements for this job

>>61254778
Animal magnetism. HR babes can't get enough of me ;)

>>61255874

>be dude
>work in HR because bills to pay idgaf
>work stagnating at current job, decide to change it up
>not getting many hits on the cvs I'm sending out
>grumbling to female colleague about it at coffee machine
>she leans in, "you didn't hear this from me, but put a nice photo of yourself on the top of your cv"
>I lol but do it anyway
>immediately drowning in responses from thirsty cougars and big businesses trying to meet diversity quotas
>pick the one with the highest salary

I guess this is what it feels like to be a woman in the tech industry.

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>>61254778
I have a windows 7 configuration cert I worked really hard on.

I'm pretty much an elite sys admin, you don;t want to disappoint me or your servers may just get uninstalled.

>>61256052
>diversity quotas
this board is for whites only

>>61257565

Dont worry Cleetus, I am white. The diversity hires were for males in otherwise all-female teams.

Why the HECK am I trying to get a job working for a DOG?

>>61257565
No, this board is for all people interested in technology, regardless of race, age, religion, gender identity, or sexual orientation. Please be mindful of your fellow posters.

>>61258316
fuck off you nignog.

>>61258316
get out nigger

>>61258363
>>61258451
/b/ stays in /b/ newfags

>>61258580
If I wanted to look at feminine boys I would go on /b/

>>61254778
>I don't think you should. There must be someone more experienced and more qualified in your list, right?

>>61256052

>ywn have business cougars desperately trying to hire you

Why must life hurt like this lads?

>>61258316
Shut the fuck up nigger kike.

>>61256052
I'm going to do this for shits and giggles for the next batch of resumes I send out.

>>61259524
>>61258363
>>61258451
/pol/ manlets cant behave themselves

errytime

>>61254778
>I am cheap.

>>61254778
Because this is my thirtieth interview which asked me that question and seemed unsatisfied with my answer, wearing down my self esteem and my appraisal of my own monetary value to your company so much that at this point I'll work slavish hours for peanuts.

>>61254778
Because I need work experience. If you don't feel it's safe to hire someone without any then that's your call.
Realistically would probably lick their balls telling them how my skill set could help them, how "good" I am and how I did stuff at home instead.

>>61254778
>Why should we hire you?
Because I responded to your advert you fucking bozo, why else am I here answering your dumb fuck questions?

>>61258195
Oh sweetie, diversity doesn't work that way.

>>61254778
I'm convinced these threads are made by tech firm shills to gaslight /g/ into accepting pajeet tier wages.

>>61256052
>be dude
>work in HR because bills to pay idgaf
>thirsty cougars and big businesses trying to meet diversity quotas
Yeah that sounds about right, any other job though lol no

>>61254778
Because I'm a strong independent black lesbian transgender woman.

>>61254778
Because I only want to work with you since years.

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>>61256052
there is some truth to this. I got hired with no qualifications or work experience. I even neglected to mention certain skills that are relevant to my job. I just made a lot of eye contact and smiled whenever she smiled (I still do this). So glad I got this opportunity so I am really trying not to fuck it up.

>>61258195
Diversity excludes white males. Sorry Jebediah.

my hardblush site ripper has stars on github

Because my only motivation was, is and will be your companie.

>>61254778
Because I have work experience. You're obviously not reading my resume, which makes sense, since you are a dog.

>hired by huge corporation
>your boss is an amazing woman
>fall for the feminism meme
damn, how did that happen? I'm always trying to moderate her but she's so energetic

>>61256052
>be dude
Boipussy with timestamp or GTFO.

>>61254778
Because I love this beyond a job, it is my hobby, so I will probably actually end up doing work while NOT being paid as well.


Congrats, your hired.

>>61254778
Remember a few years ago there were hardly ever job threads on /g/ and now there is always a disgusting fucking job thread?

God I wish millennial scum would just fuck off and die.

Because that's a one chance in a life opportunity for me to change my life for something I love more than anything, but never was motivated enough to get into.

That interview definitively confirmed it.

>>61263063
Self improvement is always a good thing, anon.

>>61254778
Jokes on you I'm a mechanical engineer already

>>61254778
Because if you show me how to the something 2 times I naturally learn how to fucking do it

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>>61263063
>probably boomerposts on facebook about laziness and whiney safespaces
>probably lives miles away from a population center in a 'safe space' away from them while at a job doing fuck all because they refuse to leave

If you were born circa 1986 you are millennial scum.

I have a bunch of projects on my git repos with tens of thousands of lines of high performance C/OpenGL/Ada code.

I also use Gentoo.

Oh right and my several years of work experience.

Listen to this one guys.

>have interview
>They like my real estate experience
>I also passed half the CPA (accounting) exam
>whoa, whoa, not so fast
>How do we know you aren't going to leave us after you pass the CPA?
>I was speechless

>>61265474
I can only speak from an IT perspective as a contractor in govt services, but most people will get a free ride from the government to get certifications and then leave once they get them. It makes it a pain in the ass to retain anyone and you're always in a constant state of chaos without people with sufficient knowledge of the programs and contracts they support.

>>61265592
Yeah I understand that. But it was an accounting position, so it is normal to try for the CPA.

>be hispanic male
>all i have to do to get a job in silicon valley is enter a building and say im a hispanic looking for a job
>they hire me and train me whilst paying me well

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>>61257565
>>61258363
>>61258451
>>61259524
>Come to discuss technology
>Redditors fresh from /b/ and /pol/ invade

E V E R Y T H R E A D
V
E
R
Y

D
A
Y

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>b-but the handshake
>sir, I want the j-job
>pls

>>61258264
Because he looks dapper as fuck in his tuxedo.

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>>61254778
>Demonstrate project on laptop
>Express enthusiasm for the field
>Get first job
>Never have this problem again

>>61254778
End your life.
Immediately.

>>61254778
because I was the most popular guy in high school and I'll take your lunch money fuckin nerd

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>>61254778
>>Why should we hire you?
Thats up to you to decide you fucking moron

why would i wanna work for someone who asks dumb as fuck questions

>>61254778
I just graduated my full time degree how could I possibly have a decent work experience ya dumb twat??!!

How low does the unemployment rate have to be before businesses are all "We'll hire anyone with a pulse" like they supposedly were in the late 90s?

>>61254778
I applied to a position that doesn't require any experience, and you gave me an interview for it based upon my application & resume.

Is this entire company retarded? Or just (you)?

>>61254778
Because I showed the technical interviews code they didn't understand.

My sample code of my hobby work is hirable alone.

>>61271809
Never because they'd rather import workers.

Because I'm a mod on r/amd

>>61254778
I got through this situation somehow

>be enthusiastic
>be amusing
>have volunteer experience

>>61272105
Suppose for a moment that you're an autist that hates everything. How would you go about faking enthusiasm?

>>61272137
Autists can be passionate about what they do, show it.