>get a job offer from apple >take it because its way more

>windows user

>>61000752
Sign the document. Collect all of applel's secrets. Learn Korean/Chinese and sell all their secrets for millions to chinks. Retire to the bahamas.

>>61000752
assuming u're not larping then don't u get free apple shit with the job?

>>61000752
I was afraid of this

>>61000938
I have to give it back if I leave so its not really mine

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>>61000752
You're aware than you can know several systems at once right?

>>61001003
I do know how to operate the apple ecosystem, thats why I got the job. But I don't eat sleep and breath apple products like these faggots.

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>>61000915

>>61000752
>interviewing at apple in the first place

>>61000752
>shit that never happened

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>I'm the only "Windows user"
>I tell them I prefer to use a system I can modify to my liking

>>61000752
Only Apple fanboys would works on apple, 12 to 14 hours per day,low salaries,low probability grow,put just Apple x to y date in resumen,Non every other thing on your life.

Facebook,Microsoft and google are better.

Every time you think to yourself "I hate these insufferable faggots" (whether it be your colleagues or your customers), just remember "...and that's why they have to pay me to be here."

It really is that simple. This is why you get paid for it.

>>61000752
Fabricated and homosexual

>>61000915
Apple keep secrets like a cult, he would work per 10 or 15 years to gains something useful

Apple is good at making a stable and good os, they are also ok at making good build quality overpriced computers and device of such. I also hate the people that use apple products

>>61000752
Can u leak some documents?I guess this is a trend now.
leak something useful

Apple products are pretty good for the most part. However, they are disgustingly overpriced. I also wish Mac OS X was more accessible. It's a good, clean, and stable OS. I personally like it more then windows, when comparing closed sourced operating systems.

>>61001653
>Apple products are pretty good for the most part.
unliek ur mum

>>61000752
Go on. I enjoy good fan fic. When does the bully "teach you" the apple way, and e plain you don't need that little rubber "virus protection" with him, because Apple doesn't get viruses?

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>>61000752
>get a job offer from microsoft
>take it because its way more than my current job
>fly out to redmond
>surrounded by pajeets in training
>ALL of them have surface pros, windows phones, and run windows 10
>one guy asks where I got my thinkpad to bully me during break (its from amazon)
>they talk shit about linux and bsd the whole time
>Im the only "linux user" in the class
>try to defend myself saying I like to use software that respects my freedoms
>"windows 10 is free you know"
>I tell them I prefer to use a system I can modify to my liking
>they laugh at me and tell me its time to learn the microsoft way or "the correct way as microsoft calls it"
>I have to sign a document stating that I should do everything in my power to "protect microsoft's source code!"
>I'm staying because the money is too good to pass up

>>61001830
everybody uses Apple @ Redmond idjit

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>>61000752
>Install loonix on a macbook with XFCE and configure it to look just like OSX
>They'll never suspect a thing

Tell us the secrets

>>61001035
Good, that's the spirit. Brand worship is caner.

>>61001592
Well thing is, there are no grand secrets.

cool story bro

>>61000752
>get a job with apple
WOW OMG EVERYONE HERE USES APPLE SHIT OMG HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? FUCKING CHAD REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

idiot. What did you expect?

>>61000752
Start using linux and act smug around them 100% of the time. Claim to be a better programmer/whatever you do then all of them. Buy a thinkpad x200 and put a bunch of stallman gnu/linux gentoo Ibad bad for your freedom stickers on it. Include the "apple why 1984 will be like 1984" sticker. Program exclusively in emacs and start editor wars costantly.

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>Get MacBook Air, iPhone 6+ and 12.9" iPad as part of my job.
>Only use the phone for calling people.
>tried to give back the laptop and iPad saying I haven't used them in 6 months.
>Boss just said to keep hold of it in case I need it

>>61000915

APPLE SECRETS LIST
>1. Brown Sugar

Haha, I work where you work and I know who you are.

Good luck, fuck boi.

>>61001535

This, there's a reason Apple isn't considered one of the Big 4

>>61000980
If the job pays good then why would you leave? install gentoo on your macbook.

I worked at a call center doing OSX support when they were announcing the new mac pro, a lot of people there were planning on buying it maxed out to "play all the latest games"
We made $10.50/hr
The disease is real

>>61000752
>chads in training

I unironically suggest you kill yourself you disgusting r9k tier faggot

>>61000752
>>I have to sign a document stating that I should do everything in my power to "protect apple's secrets!"

You're also not allowed to talk about what you did at Apple

>go to job interview
>anon, I see you worked at Apple as a software dev
>yes
>so what did you do?"
>sorry not allowed to talk about it
>maybe you can talk about languages you have used, components, frameworks?
>sorry not allowed to talk about it
>products maybe?
>sorry not allowed to talk about it
>I see

>>61001035

If I could afford it, honestly my phone, laptop, and desktop would all be Apple. Apple's overpriced, but the fact that everything's unified makes it convenient and much more handy.

I realize you can't customize as much, but honestly I don't feel like getting way too into technology is a good thing (unless it's your career). I remember getting sucked into a new tech world and installing all these Linux distros on my PC just cuz I could... what was the point? It was just for shits and giggles, and honestly there are better shits and giggles in this world than playing around with computers.

Apple Computers usually come with pre-customization that matches my preferences 90% of the time. Whereas with PC it starts with like 30% of my preferences and I have to manually bump it up 70% more rather than the 10% on Mac.

Even if you wanna customize and be a nerd, you can still install perfectly functional Windows with Bootcamp. Yes, you can install Hackintosh, but you don't get the physical aesthetics of a Mac.

Also, this is kind of douchey of me, but if I see a girl with a Macbook, iPhone, and iPad, at least I know that she's (at the very least) not poverty-ridden or dirty/homeless. I give charity to the poor, but I wouldn't sleep with them for hookups.

>>61004702

You can say what you learned. You can literally provide a resume you had, say, 5 years ago listing 8 years of Java use, and then one that lists your Java use as 13, same with frameworks and anything that wouldn't be considered a trade secret technique or some mystical in house language or resource.

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>>61002752
Emacs
Nice os
You should get vim with that

>>61004838

Actually now that I think about it I take back the thing about women. She's not necessarily poor if she doesn't have an iPhone, she could be Korean and wanting to support Samsung or something similar. I just affiliate Apple with upper-middleclass folk, perhaps it's effective marketing on their part.

>>61004997

Or just a smart shopper or frugal purchaser or not obsessed with material wealth or hedonism or the next latest phone?

At first i was like these brand loyalists are a myth no one is actually like that, but after coming to university holy shit the way people worship i phone, fuck

>>61005038

It's not worship, it's just brand recognition and familiarity and the fact that Apple's ecosystem is well-unified.

>>61005046
Still man we all know they are expensive as fuck and don't offer that much that android can't and in uni we all are dependent on parents for money here and there is a guy i know who gets iphone and start saving from that time when new iPhone comes he immediately buy that i didn't even know that there were people like that in a country like pakistan

>>61000752

>get a job offer from redhat
>take it because its way more than my current job
>fly out to Raleigh
>surrounded by neckbeards in training
>ALL of them have chinkpad, nokia flip phones, and run linux
>one guy asks where I got my thinkpad to bully me during break (its a rolex from my grandfather who fought in ww2 to defend our freedom)
>I told them their gf gave it to me last night so I wont forget her
>They said they are all wizards and never had a gf
>they talk shit about rolex as overpriced peacock feather all the time
>Im the only "brainlet" in the class
>try to defend myself saying I like to use software that makes my life easier
>UGH linux is the most user respecting software in the world
>I tell them I prefer to use a system I can modify to my liking without having to google for 5 hours
>they laugh at me and tell me its time to learn the linux way or "the correct way as linux calls it"
>I have to sign a document stating that I should do everything in my power to "protect linux source code integrity!"
>I'm staying because the money is too good to pass up

>>61001535
>Kikebook
>Micropenis
>Jewgle

>>61001035
Neither but I know Windows, OS X and Linux, even though I fucking despise OS X I know it very well.

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OP being a faggot as usual.
Went to work for apple once and stayed there for two years, left on my own volition for something paying less but made me happier.
I never even touched an apple device or OS before, everyone got mandatory and paid training in everything as obvious for 3 or 4 weeks.
Massive team of people of all kinds and not even one gave anyone shit about anything, several were like me who simply did not care about the brand or product but was doing their job.
Also, the "secrets" are basically internal comments in documents disclosing things that you as an employee cannot discuss with anyone outside but are basically logical things for who knows about tech, rarely did I see anything actually worthwhile, they don't share important shit unless you're an engineer working for them.

>>61000915
Apple's only marketable __secret__ is the mindshare. You can't steal that. Everything else is garbage.

>>61004614
I would literally be masturbating while selling $5000 Mac Pros to little children wishing to play games.

>>61004838
I'm the opposite. If I see a girl with an iPhone, I know that she's the Starbucks type and I avoid her at all costs. I once dated a girl who had a flip phone - ultimate cute

As an Apple user, the normie Apple fanbase is pretty shit

It's all about being better than other people because you bought Apple, rather than buying the better product

>>61004997
I don't know about that bro, I know a bunch of people who make $15 an hour and are basically losers who have apple phones and shit because they get them on plans and only pay 20bucks a month for them

honestly I think more unwise people with little money buy that shit via financing than rich people on a % basis

it's like when you see a 25yo american with a leased bmw 3 series, that's probably not the car he should be driving

>>61004838
>honestly I don't feel like getting way too into technology is a good thing
Why are you on this board?

>>61005135
perfect post except
>I'm staying because the money is too good to pass up

>>61000752
Call them fags and point out apples dedication to promoting dykes and fags

>>61005374
>It's all about being better than other people because you bought Apple, rather than buying the better product

Because if you buy the better product, you don't buy Apple :^)

>>61000752
>Itt thing that never happen

>>61000752
Working for Apple is maybe the only time I would ever own an Apple product.
That said, don't go out of your way to buy them. Wait for them to buy it for you.

>>61001535
If you work at their stores sure

If you actually work in development the pay is good

I'm working for them currently and am on about $105k a year.

>>61000752
>WHOOOOOSH!
When did larping on /g/ become a thing?

>>61005135

>>one guy asks where I got my thinkpad to bully me during break (its a rolex from my grandfather who fought in ww2 to defend our freedom)

2/10, try harder

>>61000752
>a system I can modify to my liking
At that point I was convinced that this was bait, written by someone tech illiterate.

>>61008305
>using the smiley with a carat nose

>>61000752
>job offer
>in the class
fake news

>>61000752
Linux Master Race in all my Programming classes I would always look like a pimp macdaddy with my terminal commands and Vim editing. Half the time I was just doing assignments in class because I was a dumb ass about it early on. People were like woah you must be like super smart at programming. I was like nah I'm just half way decent.

>>61004838

I read this whole post as "I am 90 % gay"

>>61004549
>2. Glossy plastic
>3. Expensive packaging
>4. Buying their suppliers

>>61000752
what kind of job?

>>61013408
sucking dick for that IMac Pro

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>>61001592
what fucking secrets, m8?, their software is shit, their hardware is shit and overpriced, the only think they could keep as a secret is their profit margin

>>61000752
>apple users
>chads

unlucky

oh no i have to sign a nda while working for apple

>>61000752
Just share any source code you get your hands on, let the poo in loo's run rampant.

>>61004628
Fuck off summerfag. You idiots are killing this site.

>>61001592
>Apple keep secrets like a cult
It's easy to keep secrets when there's no secrets to keep.

>>61011960
>I was like nah I'm just half way decent.

How can I be so l337?

>>61000752
Apple is a cult and is getting more cultist by the day. I hope you learn to like the Kool-Aid.

Apple products are the worst thing I've ever had the chance to work with. May god have mercy on your soul.

>mfw Apple tries to recruit me as a Linux systems engineer once a year
They do have Linux idiots, tons of it. Those web sites and services aren't running on xserves lol.

>>61000752
2014
No job

Offered job at Apple
Tested very high on scoring during test phase and they want to move forward

Go in for classes, fail by one question, the cutoff and I didn't meet it by one question

No job, contacted few months later about same position

Moving forward until they find out I was already a candidate and didn't meet the final test requirement

Didn't get the job

2015
Got a job in info-sec
Changed my life

Fuck apple

>>61010615
$105k/year is shit wages if you're any good. This year I'll make over 3 times that, and for the past several years I've been 200k minimum.

Apple underpays for experienced talent, and overpays for young talent.

>>61010615
but do you live in san francisco? $105k aint shit in SF, $75k is enough to qualify for low income housing there

>>61019802
Maybe try living somewhere less shit?

>>61004838
>being at all interested in girls
get the fuck out

>>61019817

this desu senpai. that city is legit trash

I use a retina MBP for work that thing's lit.

>>61001830
this

>>61000752
You always hide your powerlevel, always.