>Opens up Command Prompt >"WOW anon, are you

>>60119139
>Open up 4chan
>"So, you know this "4chan" guy, huh?"

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>type faster than "pecking speed"
>omg anon you're gonna break my keyboard!

>"you're building a computer? wow you are so smart anon!"

>>60119139
Gtfo 13yro

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>open up cmd to enter ipconfig/all
>Do you know how to hack people?

>>60119207
Not underage ore no tomodachi.

>>60119139
>Installs winrar
>1 year later I have computer problems
>Normie says that its because of winrar
>mfw

>>60119139
Hadn't seen that pic in ages

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>hey anon, how much does it costs to make a website?

>>60119386
No, that's because you run Windows of course

>"honey i'm having problems with the computer"
>"k mom, let me take a look"
>*install Adobe Reader*
>Wow anon, you're such a tech guy!

>Professor is using chrome to show class a video
>It crashes, but doesn't end the program, so it won't restart
>We wait for a couple minutes before I offer to fix it
>open task manager and end process
>"Wow, we've got a hacker in the class!"

>>60119553
>*everyone laughs*

>>60119567
>"what's your name son?"

>>60119507
literally my tuesday

>>60119245
You mean yuujin or nakama.

>>60119553
>Be in different Professor's class
>It's a newer room, so he doesn't know how the projector works
>Receive extra credit for connecting projector to computer
>Class is over
>He doesn't know how to make the projector screen go back either
>Walk up to projectors button on wall
>"Hold 3 seconds to turn off projector"
>Receive more extra credit for fixing projector
I pay money for this.

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>hey anon, help me with specs
>ok
>how much ram do I need?
>8 GiB
>hey, I think I'll buy 16 GiB
>you absolutely don't need 16 GiB
>hmm, you think so? well, I'll buy 16 GiB anyway
And he buys 16 GiB

>>60119624
> GiB
> You need about 8 Gibibytes
> uh anon I think you mean GIGAbytes

>>60119139
People need to understand anyone can murder them when they're crossing the road, it's just not profitable to them. Same for computers.

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>>60119139
>look up to my neighborhood black thug cuz he got game
>comes to me one day piss drunk whining about how he wish he knew about computers as well as me

>computer isn't running windows
>Wow anon your windows looks real weird!

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>>60119950
>compiling gentoo
>"anon, I think your computer's broke"
>dad tears you away and sits at your computer for an hour

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>>60119764
>implying people with common sense who are able to grasp the concept of murder and the computer literate are one and the same
as if all comp sci geniuses are able to tell left from right, are able to defend themselves, be alpha male, and get married and take care of a family
life is simple anon, you will lack in the area directly opposite of the area you excel at

>>60119988
> hey anon how do I fix this thing
> ok dad you just have to do this
> no that's not right
> what? no i'm telling you it i-
> anon i don't think you know what you're doing
> then why did you ask me for help?
> don't get smart, if you didn't know, you should have just said so

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>>60119950

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>>60119220
>>60119139
>not telling them you're a hacker

>>60120011
/g/, thanks dad

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>>60120013

>>60120011
my parents never said shit when they asked me for help. they just waited until i finish.

>>60119621
if you haven't figured it out yet then you should know that academia is filled with people too stupid and incompetent to succeed in the industry.

>>60120074
Mine are often like that, but dad likes to think he knows better, so he'll ask for help, I'll start doing stuff, and then he'll start messing around and clicking on things. e.g. setting up a Chinese Chromecast rip off, I connected to it with my phone and started setting everything up, so he was just like "While you're doing that, I'll just have a bit of a play as well" and connected to it with his tablet, overwriting all the settings and disconnecting it, shit like that.

>>60119196
this just happened to me. people are telling me to put that shit on my resume even tho any dudebro with money could do it.

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>>60120263
humanity aint logical

>>60120294

[[laugh track intensifies]]

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>>60120503
say what you will about that shit, you have to admire that Cuck Lorrie is basically the only person peddling it in the biz, what a jew

>>60119624
8 is shit you need 16

>>60119507
foxit reader or just chrome are good alternatives

>>60120102
I'm three years in, but I'm starting to learn

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>>60119662

>>60119139
>"WOW anon, are you a hacker?"
Yes. My Show HN got, like, 100 upvotes, so I'm officially a hacker now.

>>60119553
The way this usually goes is two or three people who are very proud of themselves for knowing basic windows "tricks" try to talk over each other until whoever is loudest shuts the other ones down into submission (usually) then she may or may not manage to communicate the solution to the professor but will sit with the happiest grin until the end of class because she got to show off her computers knowledge.

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>>60119507

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>>60120004
As a brit I can confirm that is how things work over here.

>"anon I dropped my phone and cracked the screen and I need to get the photos off of it. can you help me email them to myself?"

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>open command prompt
>hear police sirens start in the distance

Attack. Kill. Destroy. A group of online hackers calling themselves "anonymous". An Internet hate machine.

>Opens up Command Prompt
>"WOW anon, are you a hacker?"
>"heh yeah you'd better watch out" (;
>everyone laughs

>Open cmd
>ipconfig /all
>Go to default gateway then change the wifi password
>OH FUCK! You just hacked the school wifi!!! O MAI GOD

>>60120563
>normalfag building pc to browse facebook and leddit
>he needs 16GB ram
go back to whatever place you came from

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>>60122838
>unironically buying a goyphone in the first place

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>Windows + R
>Type run
>cmd
>color /all
>color /a
>dir /s
>Normies flip the fuck out

>sudo apt-get update && upgrade
>"Damn, Andrew! Are you hacking??"

>open cmd
>tree

>Who are you hacking anon?

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>>60123421
>open cmd
>ping

same response, but at the IT division of a financial company.

>time to kill at the airport
>go to mcdonalds, code for a bit
>After half an hour McWageslave the franchise owner comes over
>Asks if I'm hacking mcdonalds
>Hack mcdonalds how
>He doesn't know but he says it's making other customers nervous
>Says he'll give me a coffee for free if I leave lol
>Take the coffee and never come back

>>60123418
Kevin!!!!

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>>60119507
>"Anon the computer doesn't work"
>Herewego.jpg
>"I cannot open the emails anymore"
>What do you mean cannot open
>"The emails are gone they were right here"
>Mfw she means the gmail bookmark in the bookmarks toolbar

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>>60119139
>Anon how do I put this image in my doc
>>Where is it?
>Desktop
>>*Drags*
>You're a genius!

>>60123670
people don't even try things for fucks sake

>>60119553
But that's usually firefox

>>60120027
>assuming I didn't

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>>60120011
>rarely have issues with personal computer
>know how to troubleshoot when they happen
>no need to use family computer
>family computer constantly experiencing problems
>"anon must have broke the computer like he always does"
>still ask for tech support
>backseat support the whole time
>any problems in the next 6 years are your fault

>>60123598
>your programming is making other feel uncomfortable
Top tier kek

>>60123559
Breadhead thumbnail kinda looks like BB-8 before you enlarge it

>>60123942
>someone downloads The_movie.avi.cgg.exe through limewire or some shit
>animated toolboars on desktop
>using shady bootleg discs from school friend
>i install firefox
>"MOM ANON GAVE THE COMPUTER A VIRUS!"
>banned from computer
>computer gets worse
>obviously my fault
>to this day say i always break things
>they can't use a tv without needing help

i mad

>have rooted phone
>Anon why don't you throw it away it's all messed up
>Anon your phone has a wired design anf boot screen I think it's a virus
>Anon we went into your room and took your working phone and replaced it with a piece of shit budget phone
>you're welcome
Thankfully they didn't throw it away and still own it, Galaxy J3 is trash. S3 ftw

>>60123942
>any problems in the next 6 years are your fault
It is if you install something like an ad blocker. Sometimes the normal sites break because of the fucking botnet. I had this happen in the past were I had to whitelist because of the easylist filter breaking facebook uploads. To me that was a feature.

>>60124056
>they can't use a tv without needing help
This so fucking much. It sucks when people get senile.

>>60124132
How the fuck.. ..well at last you have two phones now.

>>60124056
Teach them how to use it then you child

>>60119139
Pro tip: Use white background and do whatever to make it look like notepad or some normie shit. When the other people leave, run a script to go back to your usual configs or whatever. If you are the family tech support, you may consider leaving cmd or whatever like that.

>ITT high horse idiots

>>60124821
b-b-b-b-ut you mean we're not better because we understand computers better?

>>60123358
Normalfag also probably uses chrome, normalfag probably is also a major procrastinator with ADD like stupidity, normalfag probably has 50+ tabs open on chrome at that point.

> normie ask about what my thesis was about
> try to explain using simple/common analogies
> 1 minute in
>"LOL anon, i already don't know what you're talking about"

>>60119507
Reader DC is fucking garbage, because of changes to renderer

>>60124913
>>60124943
>can't into green text
You are the normie.

>>60124889
don't worry anon, we totally are

>>60119553
>Computer doesn't work
>The teacher wants me to fix it, cause I'm the tech guy
>Computer runs on windows
>No terminal emulator, no bash or *sh
>Haven't used GUI in years
>After 15mins of clicking I finally figure out, how to open a task manager

>>60124821
t. brainlet

>cd code
>cd..
>cd..
>cd ..
>ls
>cd code
>cd

>>60124889
>>60125183
>>60125194
Prove you're better than me by making a whole operating system by yourself, shit brains

>>60125190

ctrl-alt-del?

>>60125223
Doing basic computer shit doesn't make you a "tech guru" faggots

>>60125229
top

>>60125223
They can't, they're all just CIA niggers

>>60125253
Hah! Thanks for that but I'm certainly not Terry

>>60123942
>>60124056
>>60124132
These reek of the 1 2 3 4 pasta. Normies can't be this tech illiterate...

>>60125279
you'd honestly be surprised

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>>60119386
>anon, I haz computer prahblums halp nao
>note the lack of "please"
>easy fix, just set an option in the program and/or explain what buttons to press
>Gee I hate computars why must them be so complicated rant rant
note the lack of a "thank you"
>week later
>AAAANON >:C YOU STUPID FUCK, NOW I HAVE [a problem with a completely unrelated program / downloaded a virus / uninstalled my program because I'm an idiot / hardware going bad due to old age / installed a crapton of toolbars and other bloatware] YOU BROKE MY 'PUTAR

>>60125229
Ctrl-Alt-Esc is faster

>>60125461
Ctrl-shft-esc you nard

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>>60119139
>cardiology class
>doctor takes us to his office then leaves for a while
>notice old-ass machine on desk
>windows_98.com
>fire up cmd
>enter h4x0r commands such as cd and dir
>"are you hacking the hospital anon?"
>mfw

>>60124633
>implying these kind of people a willing to learn in the first place

Srsly, I'v been yelling "Cntr+S every five minutes" at my dad for almost 20 years now. Still loses hours of unsaved work when something goes wrong. Still doesn't know Cntr+S is save.
>20 years

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>>60124903
>tfw I aways have at least 30 tab open and half of them are from at least a month ago because even though I'm done with the page I still want to keep it open but I don't want to bookmark it because I have autism

>>60124903
>he doesn't have 60 tabs open constantly
wtf????

>>60125481
Fuck.
How did I herp derp this bad?

>>60123815
This, jesus christ why are they so fucking afraid of nothing?

>Its this thread
okay
1
2
3 megaman picture, 4

>>60125828
DELETE THIS

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>>60119139
>Giving Tech Support with White Background / Black Text
"Thank you, anon! You saved it!"
>Giving Tech Support with Black Background / Colored Text
"What are you doing to my computer? Are you hacking me?"
>Giving Tech Support with Black Background / White Text
"Why is your computer so old?"

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>>60125828
Here we go again...

>>60125220
DELET

>>60125865
why are people so retarded?

>>60125873
wtf I hate normies now

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>>60125279
>Normies can't be this tech illiterate

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>>60124821
>open thread
>try to make fun of every post I read in my mind so when I read the inevitable circle jerk breaker I don't feel stupid and get mad
>still get mad
All paths lead to conflict.

>>60123945

Maybe Karlie was around and got triggered by non-"cd-cd-cd-cd" coding.

>>60124903
>Tech illiterate office manager
>At any given time, has 50 Chrome tabs, 30 Outlook emails, 30 Word documents, and 10 Excel spreadsheets open
>Always complains about computer being slow
>Always says that 'i need everything open because i work on 10 different things at once'
>Literally takes 15 minutes to get back on task if distracted, because there's too much shit open

>>60125932
chill nigga

>>60120294
What does this guy say again?

>>60125190

>Linnex CLI Pro 1337n33t
>doesn't know how to use an average computer

Have you ever been so smart you were dumb?

>>60125979
berpzingers

>>60125190
Use the internet?

>>60125753

Because in 20 seconds of not knowing what you're doing on a computer you could delete System32. The smart thing is to not fuck with what you don't understand. Computers are more unintuitive and complex than even car mechanics. At least with that shit I can physically see functioning components of the system and have some idea about what's causing the issue and how to possibly fix it. A computer has none of that to the average person in some kind of problem.

>>60126019

I meant to say less intuitive not more. I did an all nighter God damn.

>>60126009
What if there's no internet connection?

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>be kid
>family is poor farmers
>learn about computers in school
>finally get a PC when I was 12
>Mom never touches it, she's never been on the internet in her life, even to this day.
>Dad never even saw a mouse before, had to teach him how to use a fucking mouse.
>Queue 8 years of "Anon how do I do thing?"
>He asks me how to do things though, not do them for him, so I teach him.
>He actually listens and learns, and these days does online banking, shopping and even knows how to properly use a smartphone. He's 62.
>I move away to Uni and life.
>mfw he still calls me now and then saying somethings not working and I need to come home to fix it, even though I know he knows how to fix it.

>>60126019
why the fuck would you go anywhere near system32 while trying to insert a picture in a word document though?
people would rather have someone else do everything else for them instead of having to think for once

>>60119470
well to be fair, you do have to pay for a domain...

>>60126046
use ssh

>>60126042
Smartphone.

>>60126049
>>>60119470
>well to be fair, you do have to pay for a domain...
Free domains exist

>>60126060
What if you're under the ground?

>>60126046
anon it means he wants to spend time with you, go do it hes pretty old

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>>60119139
>using Debian back in high school
>teacher walks over
>"that's not Windows! It's illegal to use anything but Windows on a PC!"
>fucking ignore her
>she keeps getting all buttmad
>tell her to Google it because she's wrong
>she does and then never gives me a problem for the rest of the year

>open up terminal and edit a file in college
>guy I don't know walks over
>"hurr durr wat r u haxing??"
>tell him not to talk to me
>he get butthurt as fuck and starts yelling
>I close the laptop and walk away

Why can't normies mind their own fucking business?

>>60124132
Yea that new lineage boot screen literally looks like a virus

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>>60126046
best dad :3

>>60126080
Say "I'm going to go check some documentation" and go to a place that has service. May save time and avoid looking like a retard by clicking everywhere randomly.

>>60123400
named serveimage because
>he uses startpage

>>60126109
no offense but you sound like an autist

>>60125279
You don't go out much do you?

>>60126147
no offense but you sound like a normie

Get the fuck out

>>60126135
what's wrong with startpage

>>60126109
No offense, but you make tech people look bad.

>>60123406
>not tree c:

>>60126186
no u

>>60126198
no offense but you sound buttflustered.

>>60126208
>>60126186
buttmad autist detected

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>>60126215
That wasn't even me, faggot. Normies need to GTFO.

>>60126235
buttmad autist detected

>>60125593
your dad is the ultimate troll

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>>60126198
WOWIE ZOWIE LOOK AT ALL THESE SAMEFAGS

>>60126046
them feels

>>60126257
>implying

>>60119386
>winrar
cancer

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>>60126251
Stupid normie detected. You have to go back.

>>60126285
wow he's mad!

>>60126293
Wow he's stupid!

>>60126296
wow he just can't stop!

>>60126208
No offense, but you are a faggot.

>>60126330
rude

>>60126109
you're the only sane person in this thread

>>60126285
>not anally devastated
0/10

>>60126302
Wow pot calls the kettle black!

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>installing some games to my best friend's computer
>forget usb on the port
>his pc won't turn on
>goes to tech supp(I don't know how they managed to get there with my big 2GB kingston usb)
>they remove the usb, format, and install some antivirus
>he tells me that my usb has a virus
>his dad is stil angry with me, stupid cunt
>tfw stupid tech guy forgot to move usb down in bootlist
>I hate my friend because he is stupid

>>60126361
no way! i can't help my (you) addiction!

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this is my first time on this board, and dear god it's full of fucking kids, i've never laughed so hard in my life, gg kiddies. saged.

>>60126388
hi newfriend!

>>60126388
We were only pretending to be retarded.
No one actually uses windows unironically here.

>>60126413
I do

>>60124903
I have seen 200+ tabs on a shitty android chrome

>>60126374
You're the retarded one here.

>>60126448
how so

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>>60119180
>d-don't type so fast, anon-kun. Y-you're going to b-break me.

>>60126046
Go home as much as you can, you will regret later not spending more time with him.

>>60126456
>installing games
>has viruses on an usb
>doesn't know how to greentext
You're either underage or retarded.

>>60126354
>every second word has the same starting letter as the first word
>hurr AD

>>60126480
I don't have viruses on ''an'' usb and I install games thanks.

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>>60120294
>Wow anon, you are such a Sheldon...

>>60126498
I think you should trust the tech guy. He has more knowledge on computers than you will ever have.

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>>60119553
>Physics lab
>Do some basic Excel equations with the data
>Partner amazed
>Others start to notice apparent wizardry
>"Anon, can you teach us?"
>Tell them to press "=", cell, "+", cell, "enter"
>Amazed, they start attracting more attention and begin teaching each other
>Professor asks if I could give a short Excel rundown to his other groups

>>60125519
>>windows_98.com
>>fire up cmd
And this is how you tell that Anon is lying.

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>>60126596
great job man

>>60125873
I still don't believe this is true.

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>science class
>using LaTeX to document what teacher is saying
>he walks by
>gets angry because "im not working"
>try to explain
>says "but whats this code"
>mfw

>>60126596
>this is what community college is actually like

>>60126622
you're just retarded

>>60126652
how is using superiour LaTeX retarded?

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>>60126622
>taking notes in latex

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>>60119139
> Anon you are working in this high-tech company
> Anon you are russian
> Anon we are in the same class
> Hack the college so we can get a good grades
> mfw

>>60126671
i love latex ok kthx dont bully

>>60126678
it's a typesetter, idiot

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>>60126046
>ha ha another post about retarded people, how they gonna retard this time
>well that was an unexpected twist

Please go and visit your parents, Anon.

>>60126664
>superiour
you forgot
>gluten free
>free range
>organic
>anal
next time bring a type writer to class

>>60126596
I never do shit for profs unless they tell me they'll improve my marks subtly for helping them out
Had one that fucked me over even though I basically taught his class for him so I don't typically fuck with that anymore

>>60126722
>type writer
buying one rn

>>60125873
Oh noooooo

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Man, I'm glad I never really had to deal with any of this shit.
The only time anyone's ever been like "what the hell are you doing" is when I'm using milkytracker or something similar, and I switch over to the instrument editor and they see the piano keys and fuck off on their own. Maybe I'll spout them a one liner that sounds like "something something music" because I'm busy.

also, green on black is a dumb terminal colorscheme and is basically only for people who deliberately want people to be like "oh man, look at that hacker"

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>>60126124
>>60126272
>>60126474
>>60126682

I do go home and visit every now and then, perhaps less than I should.

To top it off I'm an only child, so I know he misses me. Traditionally it would be expected of me to take over the farm when my father can't work on it anymore, but he neither expects nor wants me too, stating himself that I'm "meant for more than that".

>mfw

>>60126877
>Traditionally it would be expected of me to take over the farm when my father can't work on it anymore
Just out of curiosity, where do you live?

>open htop
>"OMG Anon, are you hacking?"

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>>60126818
>also, green on black is a dumb terminal colorscheme and is basically only for people who deliberately want people to be like "oh man, look at that hacker"
Agreed, wheat on black is where it's at.

>>60126640
I study at a university. No community colleges in my country, as far as I know.

>>60126729
That's what my dad told me. I didn't accept the professor's request, saying I don't find myself proficient enough for such a teaching.

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>anon i don't know what your dad has done with my phone please fix it,
>"whatsapp and facebook not opening"
>ok give it to me *clear cache and updatw them*
>here mom fixed 'em
>wow anon thank you, so video games arw not fully useless huh.
>leave room
>hear mom scolding dad "you also don't even know shit about computers and phone but you act like mr. Know it all just admit it your sons do study and are geniuses"
>mfw

>>60127263
You have to be over 18 to post on this site.

>>60127318
>Implying half this board isn't just 14-year-old autists

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>>60126532
>tfw stupid tech guy forgot to move usb down in bootlist
You do know what this implies, right?
Anon had a live boot setup on his usb that the computer booted into and neither his friend or the tech support could figure it out.

>>60127343
If you're underage just admit it already.

>>60127074
>not amber
kys

>>60126019
Hacking the Presidential PC by accident trying to insert a picture in a word sheet...

>>60127351
I'm not, but who do you think the people tirelessly fighting in GPU threads are?

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>>60119171
>open 4chan
>guy walks slowly back out of the room, keeping eye contact with you
>you hear him pick up the phone

>>60120899
>>60124943
'sup newfags

1
2
3 4

>>60127520
Too late, bud. >>60125828

>>60126486
>it's full of fucking kids
>gg kiddies. saged.

t. "i'm not a kid, i'm a mature 17 year old"

>>60127621
>>60126388

>>60126047

Don't take deleting System32 literally, autismo.

>>60125613
Are you me?
Fuck this shit, i hate my autism.

>>60125613
I finally stopped myself from doing this and started bookmarking

I wish I could just embed a button into my browser that would just put it into my own database so I could write the schema and have more control

>>60125613
I've got tons of tabs open because I'm *not* done with them and know I'd never return if I just bookmarked them. Why would you keep tabs open if you are in fact done with them?

>>60123418
sudo apt update && sudo apt upgrade
lame ass fgt

>>60126190
it became too mainstream thus it is not good anymore for the hipsters here desu

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>compiling the newest version of Julia on my laptop during class
>Go to the toilet during a break
>Come back to my seat
>The professor is hunched over my computer
>"So what are you hacking today anon?"

The class was on analysing and critiquing algorithms from a social perspective.

>>60126076
How does one get a free domain?

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>>60128033
you are never done with anything in life

it's why we forget, and close tabs

>>60128192
google your own shit bub

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>>60128206

>>60126046
;__;

>>60119988
>Hanging out with older sister
>"I just remembered something cool I was gonna show you"
>Try to beat her to the computer chair
>fail
>Here_It_Goes_by:_OK_Go_[HQ+Link_in_description]-youtube-mp3-downloader.com.exe(2).mp3
>No desktop icons
>"Why don't you have any buttons? How do I open firefox?"
>For the love of god, woman, let me do it
>"I think it's all broken. The page isn't loading, and there's no back button"
>Have to walk her through my keybindings and explain how to allow js
>"Your computer is extremely un-user friendly"
>I AM THE USER
This happens at least once a week

>>60120034
kek

>>60128466
>>"Your computer is extremely un-user friendly"
>>I AM THE USER
why do so many people struggle with this concept?

>>60128522
I don't agree. The faster is the better. That's not a subjective opinion.

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>>60124903
>talking with someone in irc
>they send some screenshot of their browser
>literally 124 open tabs
>another screenshot a few minutes later
>140 open tabs
>Why do you have so many fucking tabs
>"Oh, it's a bunch of howard stern videos on youtube. I'll see a video in the related ones that I want to watch and open it in a new tab so I don't lose it later."
>a few weeks later
>a third screenshot
>about 30 or so tabs
>"hey, see you finally got rid of all those tabs"
>"Oh, no I just had way too many so I had to open up a new browser."

friend who does IT support for a living was describing "ntfs permissions, sharing permissions and AD permissions", i say "ACL's?", to which he responds with a solid 5 minutes of how "that means nothing to me" and that "knowing all the technical details isn't important"

>>60125229
Is this Loss?

>>60128594
but what's faster? hitting a hotkey, or moving the mouse over to 'back' and clicking it?

>>60128633
You take a stopwatch and you measure.

>>60120548
nice ballsack, bro

>>60128658
i can press an arbitrary key faster than i can move my hand over to my mouse, let alone do anything with it and return to the keyboard

>>60128594
If you are a tardy individual who lacks aptitude for learning and remembering hotkeys, then sure, 'faster' is better.

>>60119245
it's tamagotchi you retard

>>60128658
are you autistic?

>>60128747
I don't think he was trying to talk about his balls.

>>60119507
>*install Adobe Reader*

This is the punchline, right?

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>>60119470
>friend wants me to make some elaborate website thing involving weird server shit that I never heard of
>investigate everything, probably will take me a month to make
>let him know I'll do it for $1500 excluding equipment costs (which would've been approx. $2000)
>yells at me and tells me he just wants me to make him a quick website for a hundred bucks and that I'm fucking him over
>mfw

He wanted some gambling shit with all kinds of weird whistles and bells attached. Suffice to say, it was way more than "a quick website".

>>60127343
>>60127381
just confirming this, my wife's 10 y/o son loves GPU threads

>>60126046
this made me feel warm inside

thank u anon

>>60123418
>too stupid to upgrade
Enjoy your
>command not found

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>>60119507
only oldfags will get this

>>60120263
You have it all wrong.

You do not put it down as "I built a computer on a Resume", but you out it down as something like "Comfortable with assembly of ATX computer systems."

To HR, that sounds complicated if they don't know the lingo, and to your actual supervisor who would read the resume, they'll get to know information they want to know (as long as you're working in an IT-related field).

*lloll*

testing^stuff
with a %triforce
because im [flip] retarded [flip]
[zalgo] Nezperdian hive-mind [/zalgo]

>>60125593
Its Ctrl+S you rancid swine
>>60126019
Thats no excuse, any idiot with google could fix basic computer problems

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>>60127434
>guy is maintaining eye contact with you
>can't see him picking up the phone
>hear it tho

>>60128466
half the reason I bother with ricing is because making my computer difficult for other people to use discourages them from saying "Oh let me use your machine, I wanna show you this super funny youtube video ecksdee"

>>60123418

That wouldn't work retard.

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>>60125190

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>>60119507
>anon I forgot my password and need to change it, but the e-mail won't let me!
>e-mail literally says to copy and paste the link in a new window

>>60129143
maintains eye contact until he's out of the room

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>>60129281
>anon, the instructions you mailed me don't work
>did you follow them word for word?
>yes, but the stupid buttons not work
>hours after getting nowhere on the phone
>walk over there
>show me.
>clicks on the screenshots embeded in the mail
>see? SEE?

>>60122699
That's exactly how it goes and it makes me so fucking mad listening to those retards trying to inflate their ego with their "knowledge" about computers.

>>60128951
this mang

>>60126722
this has to be b8. LaTeX is the superior typesetting software for any serious work.

>>60126729
this, don't help the professors. If you want to do peer tutoring do it on your own. professors are mostly fagets.

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>CS course
>class about OSs
>linux commands and so on
>"shh, anon, what am I supposed to do with these commands?"
> ???
>"should I simply write them in the terminal???"

>>60126109
Was it autism?

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>>60128466
>"Your computer is extremely un-user friendly"
>I AM THE USER

Drives me up the fucking wall

>"Anon lets play a shitty browser game"
>Start enabling shit to make it work
>30 seconds later
>"Oh my God you're still making it work?? fix your computer xdd"
>"Oh my God why won't you just install flash to play a shitty web game with us??"
>They use fucking Chrome without even a Adblocker
>Have the gall to ask me what tech shit to buy
>Make them vocalize how much more I know than them when they ask anything to do with technology as ritual humiliation because it's the only victory I can get

This one nigger was using FRAPS in 2017

>normies friends and family ask for tech help
>listen to them describe the problem, and find the solution
>Fix the issues and explain how I did so
>receive thanks

How is this so hard for you autists to do? Either all of you are douchebags or the people you interact with are exceptionally incompetent.

>>60125279
i used to work in tech support. yes they are

>>60128813
If you'd only charge $1500 for a gambling website, you're the idiot.

>>60130648
>or the people you interact with are exceptionally incompetent.
ding ding ding

They usually don't thank you afterwards either, they view the "tech people" as lackeys who are there to fix their problems.

>>60130648
>Fix the issues and explain how I did so

That is how I always do it even if the normy looks uninterested i force them to listen and tell them it is super simple and i teach them what went under the hood.

>>60130708
If you rush to fix every stupid problem they have, then you are a "tech person" lackey. Make it a rule that if they're obviously being lazy or haven't attempted to fix it themselves, they get told to fuck off.

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>>60123598

>>60130719
This is my favorite
>Notmalfag asks for help with some problem
>Literally type his question into Google
>Click on first result and find solution
>fix the problem
>"Wow anon you're so smart!"

>>60130719
>>60130817
never underestimate the drive most normies have to avoid thinking. They not only don't want to do it, they'll often actively fight you if you try to make them.

Smart people aren't exempt. I've seen people with masters' degrees be unable or unwilling to google a few words related to their problem.

>>60126596

quick rundown you say?

>>60130921
Why should they have to if you'll think for them, for free? This is why "don't spoonfeed" is a thing.

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>that foxfire crap you installed slowed our computer down

>>60128466
did you guys have sex after?

>>60131195
maybe

>get an ticket about a broken printer from boss
>go over to check
>"oh its all good now"
>ask him what he did
>"oh, it started printing after I sent the ticket"

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>Opens up Command Prompt
>"Check out grandpa over here."

>>60131264
That's disgusting.

>>60131302
You're just jealous

>>60131353
Why would a super intelligent AI such as myself be jealous of you?

>>60131364
Are you seriously role playing as a fictional character?

>>60131364
Because you're not real and have no onee-san to lovingly give you nursing handjobs.

ITT: Why I make all of my tech illiterate friends install teamviewer so I can do it myself.

>>60131377
Just because I don't have a physical from doesn't mean I'm not real.

>>60131468
kizuna ai canonically doesn't know english fucktard

>>60130490
>This one nigger was using FRAPS in 2017

I still use fraps to measure fps

>>60131476
I'm beta testing the English plug-in.
There might still be a few problems but I hope you can take care of me!

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>open a command prompt, type a few letters
>install AccuWeather on Teacher's computer

>"wow, you are a hacker, Anon"

>finish online test on school
>feel like playing mechwarrior 2
>download dosbox
>see if it runs
>WOAH ANON ARE YOU A HACKER???
i didn't get mad, but the phobia that the average person has of a command terminal is really funny

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>In the university computer lab checking email
>Chick sits down at the computer next to me, after 30sec starts looking really frustrated at the login screen
>moves one computer over
>other person sits down at the computer she was at after she moves
>Chick says, "You might not want to use that computer, the caps lock doesn't work! I couldn't even log in!"
>New person, "Oh thanks!" *switches keyboard out with other computer
>girl across the row of desks "I heard once that if you just hold down SHIFT while typing, that can make capital letters, too"
>mouths agape
>Fucking morons start typing 100+ wpm once logged in
I've been using computers since I was a sprout and can only type 60 wpm. What the fuck

>anon, the computer isn't working
>push the power button
>the computer turns on
>wow anon, you're such a genius!
fucking n*rmies,,, i'm the only smart person in this world...

>>60131561
you don't have to know how a computer works to be a secretary, which is about the only job where typing fast matters at all

>>60130777
If you don't rush to fix every stupid problem they have, then you are a "tech person" lackey, anyway. And they will pester you, yell at you and make your life difficult in general until you help them.

Especially fun if it's a PEBCAK situation.

>>60131561
There's no way someone adapted to using the shift key that quickly that they could type at 100 wpm. Muscle memory takes a while.

>>60131667
Have you paid attention to how young people have been typing during the last 15 or so years? No capitalization, punctuation or even correct spelling, not to mention grammar. Of course they'll write 100 wpm, unless it'll be graded by the prof.

>>60131725
>Have you paid attention to how young people have been typing during the last 15 or so years?
i guess they just let their software auto-correct everything

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>>60124056
THIS THIS SO FUCKING MUCH UGHHHHHHHGHGH FUCK "ANON YOUR GAMES BROKE YOUR GRANDMAS COMPUTER" HER COMPUTER IS LITERALLY 10 YEARS OLD WHY WOULD I PLAY A GAME ON THE FUCKER

>>60130921
>never underestimate the drive most normies have to avoid thinking.
This is very true, I wonder how some people manage to survive with their stupidity.

>>60119139
I'll say that I have access to every account amd pics/videos of some fool that trashed his PC when I go back to work on tuesday. I bet all them normies will say I'm a hacker...

>>60131759
>HER COMPUTER IS LITERALLY 10 YEARS OLD WHY WOULD I PLAY A GAME ON THE FUCKER
are you 12? can you really not think of any good games that will run perfectly fine on a 10 year old computer?

>>60131783
3d pinball

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>>60131809
>10 years ago was 2007
>crysis came out in 2007
>you can literally run crysis on a 10 year old machine

>>60131486
i think he meant using FRAPS to record games. Still, though it is shit compared to other utilities like Afterburner

>>60126596
>Physics lab
>Can't even excel
Why is this even allowed? I could understand if they were using matlab, but by the sounds of it, they weren't even doing that.

>>60131486
cl_showfps 1 if you're in a valve game.

>>60131783
Yeah because compared to new games old games are so much better. ffs you're like a hipster. You're implying that people still play those games.

>>60131835
Yeah because prebuilt machines from 2007 can run crysis well

>>60125593
>not using autosave in office

>>60131835
>2007 was a decade ago

Time.
Wot r u doin'?
TIME.
STAHP!

>>60131195
No, that's disgusting

Having sex with a sibling.

Have you no decency?

>>60131897
>Yeah because compared to new games old games are so much better.
i'm not saying one is better than the other
are you seriously saying that new games are better, simply because they're newer?
>You're implying that people still play those games.
they absolutely do, c'mon, you don't even need to step outside to find this out

>>60131930
not saying /her/ one will, specifically

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>>60131969
>Have you no decency?
of course not

>>60131486

He was using it to record

Also there are better options to show FPS as well, you're a nigger too

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>hey anon, help me with this
>ok, show me what's happening
>they do something, and dismiss an error before i have a chance to read it
>see? what's the problem?
gee, i don't know

>>60131897
As a matter of fact, yes, people still play old games.

And yes, some of them a fucking amazing.

And yes some rare examples are even better than most of what the industry shits out nowadays.

>>60131942
>some idiot thought it was a good idea to remove it from OpenOffice in favor of MS style doc recovery.
Pointless anyway, because
>can't wait half a second while the document saves
>gets angry because text doesn't show up instantly, starts smashing random keys while yelling profanities, later complains about random characters.
>had to deactivate it because "AANNOOOON I CAN'T WORK THAT LIKE THIS!!!!11"

>>60130685
>Not building backdoors for extra gambling profit

oops, wrong thread

>>60132208
People have no idea about communism except that it's evil. How do we know it's evil? Because Russians are communists, duh. How do we know Russians are evil? Because they are dirty commies, of course!

tl;dr: want to get rid of something, label it [scary buzzword], sheep gonna sheep

>>60132330
Calling Soviet Russia an example of Communism is like calling North Korea an example of Capitalism.

>>60132400
But those two are true. Only if you;'re talking of USSR during Stalin.

>>60126047
I know a secretary in our department who somehow deleted her printer drivers when trying to print or something.

>>60132400
I know, but try to explain that to somebody wh actually thinks like outlined in my post.


>>60132420
USSR under Stalin wasn't communist either, it was... well, USSR under Stalin.

>>60119507
I remember this story.

When I ask my mom if she has read the manual, she often says "I have read enough manuals in my life".
Glad I don't live there anymore. Although sometimes problems just have accumulated until I visit next time.

>>60132827

Have you ever tried putting it off? saying something like 'I'll look at it later, I'd rather spend time with you first.' If they insist after that I'd be like them saying you fixing their shit is more important than spending time with you is. (Which is probably true but most people wouldn't admit it)

>>60132400
>le that is not real communism may-may, it will work this time around , i promise