APPLE BTFO http://www.theverge.com/2017/4/19/1 5353730/apple

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>>59972525
WHAT THE FUCK, THE VERGE GOING FULL EDGY ON APPLE
HAHAHAH

>>59972610
How long does this thing take to charge?

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>>59972525
APPLEL ETERNALLY BLOWN THE FUCK OUT

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let's be honest here

this is the biggest false flagging article I have seen in years

they are dissing Apple, to get momentum for the new iPhone arrival
somewhat of a 'THEY FINALLY DID IT', because literally no one cares anymore about them

it is sad

>>59972645
>webm just to fuck with applefags
>the thumbnail pretty much shows the content anyways

>>59972620
2 minutes = 1 day, overnight = 2 months
they designed it like that specifically so that people wouldn't leave it plugged in 24/7

>>59972688
I know that everything being decided by the marketing team is supposed to be bad, but it somehow works. I guess they know what the majority of people would like.

>>59972620
10 minutes suffice for a week, give or take. A full battery holds for a couple of months at the office.
It's still an absurdly awful design choice though - how the fuck did it pass QA?

>>59972722
>>59972758
So the charging port position is literally a non issue. Just don't use the mouse for 2 minutes.

People will complain about ANYTHING Apple.

>>59972722
Was an overcharge protection circuit too innovative for them to implement? Are they saving it for the next version?

>>59972688
>Shiller
>Marketing chief

it's like poetry

>>59972825
It's a wireless mouse

>>59972881
I'm being cheeky. I know it's a mouse

>>59972752
It only worked when steve jobs was alive n he dediced tht because he ddnt think he will die, now the marketing team is running around like headless chickens

T. High level appler tht is waiting for summer to come so my contract can end so I can run away

Can someone sell me a Throttlebook for cheap, I need a lap warmer for next winter.

>>59972767
Your reading comprehension would put niggers to shame.
>It's *still* an absurdly awful design choice though
Read it again.

>>59973078
Where should it have been placed?

>>59973081
In the trash with the rest of it.

>>59973081
>>59972767
>>59972722
Samefag Apple cuck

That placement is shit and a design flaw made due to Apple's cheap manufacturing ideals and lack of innovation.

>>59973081
At the front. The mouse would certainly lose nothing by being slightly thicker.
It's a matter of taste, but I personally find it thin to the point of (minor) incontinence.

>>59973141
s/incontinence/inconvenience/
Thanks auto-complete!

>>59973141
Of course Apple could’ve put the lightning connector at the front of the mouse but didn’t want that as they see it as a design failure. Why? Because users would never unplug it and continue to use a wireless mouse as a wired one. So maybe they’re sacrificing a little user convenience to direct the masses to a better overall experience. There will always be certain users that want all the options and settings and ports possible but those users probably shouldn’t be buying and using Apple products either.

>>59973141
>The mouse would certainly lose nothing by being slightly thicker.

lol?

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>>59972688
>Shiller
>marketing
Put me in the screen cap.

>>59972702
I honestly wish Apple added webm support.

>>59973370
apple has webm support
you're just too stupid to figure out how enable it

>>59973419
>https://www.webmproject.org/users/#supported_web_browsers
>safari not on the list
sure thing buddy

>>59972645
That's a pretty fair point. Now that the Surface is actually a usable device, Apple have been caught with their pants down and the iPad Pro is not at all a proper answer to it.

>>59973174
>users would never unplug it and continue to use a wireless mouse as a wired one

Explain how having that option is a bad thing.

Hell, they should've went even further and route the signals over USB in this case so it has less lag and is impervious to signal interference.

>>59972767
Murphy's law says that it will inevitably run out of juice in the exact moment when you can't afford to stop even for a few minutes.

It's a non-issue for regular users, but it really goes with the latest trend of Apple shitting over professional users, which IMO will end up a problem - pros might not contribute a huge number of sales, but they really help the image for other buyers.

And yet, they're the most successful and influential company in all of human history.

>>59975505
This is a joke, right?

>>59975505
Google is significantly more influential at this point.

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>>59972722
>>59972767

It's not the point, it's clear that they can't into proper design because they want their fucking mouse to look like a shoe horn.

besides, two months is garbage..
https://www.logitech.com/en-us/product/marathon-mouse-m705?crid=7

>>59973419
>Have to install VLC player and launch videos outside of the browser
>every other device on the planet that can browse the web can play them within the browser

>>59975476
You don't understand murphys law. Has nothing to do with "bad" things happening. There is no objective good or bad in this sense.

>>59975720
>apple several years ago
>products that are functional and aesthetic

>apple now
>everything is 20th anniversary mac

>>59975750
u wot m8?

>"Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong"

>A mouse can run out of juice when you can't pause to charge it

>It will happen

>>59973419
Enlighten us.

>>59975781
Buy a Google Pixel

>>59972645
that webm has no sound and that guy is still annoying

>>59975772
You don't understand it lol, only things that can happen will happen. You as a person don't have a map of the entire universe and the states of every molecule in your head, so you don't know what can happen, but only what can happen will happen. Please tell me you're an american or something, or at least a highschooler.

>>59973174
>>>59973141
>Because users would never unplug it and continue to use a wireless mouse as a wired one. So maybe they’re sacrificing a little user convenience to direct the masses to a better overall experience.
Why is this bad? Wired mice have infinite battery life and less input lag, what if I value that more?
Designing things to be hard on purpose so that people are forced to use them the way you want to is the definition of bad design.

>>59975781
He's stupid and thinks playing them in an external video player counts

>>59975815
>only things that can happen will happen
Yes, and?
Are you implying that due to Apple magic, their mouse literally cannot run out of battery during time critical work?

I only have an iPhone. The rest of their ecosystem is shit.

>>59975875
Found the cuck

>>59975815
I'm from the Diamondberg School of South Carolina.

>>59975851

He's obviously retarded or American

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It's a feature™

>>59975547
>>59975570

The numbers don't lie. $740 Billion.

>>59972645
Apple:
>LIKE MAKE THE WHOLE DEVICE REALLY FUCKING LONG AND FLOPPY OR SOMETHING DUDE LMAO
Microsoft:
>just put a hinge on it

>>59973358
is it bad that i find this image cute

>>59977201
monthly fees? wtf?

>>59977396

How fucking retarded are you?

>>59977396
They change the ports monthly so you subscribe to the packs to stay up to date.

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>>59977201
>/month

>>59977201
wat

>>59977414
Different guy. Seeing the exact same shit as him, apple shill.

how stupid are faggots here if you reply to this
59973174

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apple is dumb 7 confirms
>>59977777

>>59977396
It's a feature ®

>>59977201
fake, went to https://www.apple.com/au/shop/buy-mac/macbook-pro/port-pack and it just redirected to the main page for buying the macbook pro

>>59978145
the uneven paragraph spacing, the mismatched font, the "activate windows" shit in the corner, etc, and all the rest would inform you that this isn't true; perhaps even googling might've given you that insight, but not you, the gullible moron.

>>59978245
>expecting the same dumb fucks who buy these overpriced pretend laptops to have this much intellect
What's wrong with you man!? That's like beating up someone with down syndrome in a wheel chair.

>>59977797
oh shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit

>>59978245
>Uneven paragraph spacing
>Mismatched font
I literally copied a cable network provider's site

>Active windows
Has literally nothing to do with the authenticity of the page

>And all the rest
Epic, you fucking retard. You dumb pathetic little fuxking retard.

The only thing that may give it away would be the image's edges which are slightly feathered. That's probably not a design choice Apple would make.

Faggot. Little cuck boy faggot. Useless fucking faggot.

>>59978325
yeah, the "only" thing. That's why you'll never do marketing for a company like this, because you're a waste of molecules and a complete loser.

kys. faggot.

>>59978325
>>59978353
I'm fucking dying

>>59972525
Does it work on their computers? I could see it being useful there

>>59977701

What are you talking about? Its a fucking troll pic. The absolute fucking irony. A troll joke pic, laughing at the oh so dumb Apple users, gets taken as real material from the people calling them dumb.

Holy shit. Yes, you really are that dim witted. Just neck yourself.

>>59978353
What's that you fucking dumb faggot? You little gay mess of flesh. You homo fucking retarded cocksucking AIDS monkey.

>B-b-but much design choices
Ha! You make me laugh, little pathetic Jewish rodent.

How about a bit of sensibility over the reasonability of subscriber port pack hardware? No. Nothing. You had your chance and you missed it because you're a failure in life and you're a failure on the chans. You're going nowhere in life. You're fucking worthless scum that exists to infest. Your family doesn't love you. Your friends hate you. You will die and nobody will care. You're trash and everyone knows it.

Get out before you hurt yourself, bitchboy

Thing is Apple has so much cash in the bank they could have multiple failed iPhones sold as loss leaders and still be fine.

They actually don't even need to make anything they can probably stop selling everything and still keep the lights on not laying off a single person for a decade.

I mean they could straight up give away the next iPhone.

It's pretty fucked how much fucking cash they have in the bank. I don't quite understand why they don't just buy up the entire supply chain. They have the cash to do so.

>>59978569
lolnope

http://www.marketwatch.com/story/apple-isnt-really-sitting-on-216-billion-in-cash-2016-01-26

This isn't even taking into account the billions of unpaid taxes apple owes to like everyone.

>>59978569
This. Apple is the most successful company on the planet.

>applelshitters are THIS gullible

>>59972767
lol, just buy two mice, keep one charged!

>>59973419
>I-IH-I-IT DOES!!! YOU JUST HAVE TO ENABLE IT!!!
>how do i enable it?
>...
FUCKING LOL

>>59978657

Interesting - but they still could pull that out of investments. Most of the worthwhile buyouts are overseas anyway so I don't see why not.

Taxes lol they will never pay that. Those greedy fucks. If the tax man comes for them they will just BTFO the government with a threat of leaving the USA.

>>59978699

They got a lot of money so if you base success on that then your probably right.

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>>59977201

>>59978446
Not those guys, but I fell for it too. But maybe that's because I haven't really used an apple product since the first generation iPod Video.

>>59978451
(you)

>>59972645
>What happened to apple design
That's what happens when you buy literally anything Apple makes, I swear there are people who would buy a literal shitlog on a plate if it had an apple logo on it. Then when questioned about their purchase, they would say that their plate of shit offers a more pleasurable shit on a plate experience than the competitors.

>It's a plate of shit, its just what I needed, it just works for all of my plate of shit needs
>You're just mad your not nigger rich enough to afford it!

>>59979005

You have to be a colossal fucking autist to fall for that. I can point out no less than 20 different obvious things that prove its satire, but here's a few just with the idea, not even the screenshot itself.

>Apple wouldn't trademark 'Retina experience', or any experience never mind a fucking screen description
>There is no fucking 'My Account' shit on Apple's websites, they're strictly for shopping and shitposting in support forums hidden away
>'automatically including' is pajeet English
>Apple would never announce price increases on their site, and then say their shoddy system is bugging out or whatever

And last, but most obviously

>a monthly subscription for a port hub
>a monthly subscription for a fucking port hub


I don't even know how dumb someone has to be to think that wasn't satire made by some random guy. I don't know how you can believe that image is real Apple material, and operate a computer at the same time. This board is probably the single dumbest place I've ever fucking seen on the whole internet, and anti-Apple spergs create around 80% of the dumbest posts I see.

>>59977370
no, it's a cute image

Why does apple love dongles so much?

Also is it true that new iphone models don't have a 3.5mm audio port?

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>>59981467
Because _dong_les

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>>59981720
>>59981467
their new logo is revolutionary

>>59981467

>is it true that new iphone models don't have a 3.5mm audio port?

You're actually asking this? Is it some kind of secret information or something that everyone doesn't in fact know? Jesus Christ, the dumb shit I see on this board astounds me. The literal retard implying something else is dumb. Just wow.

>>59981467
apple isn't THAT dumb

>>59975720
And this is fully legitimate.
I bought my current one about 12.5 months ago. I almost never turn it off. I use it several hours a day. It is still on the batteries that came with it and it estimates about 70% charge remaining.

>>59972767
>Just don't use the mouse for 2 minutes.

>mouse runs ou of power while browsing
>cool bro, why not do shit for 2 minutes until you can continue.

>>59975815
It seems to me, and every other person in this thread, that YOU are the one not getting it. There is no need to involve materialism/determinism/metaphysics to interpret such a straightforward rule of thumb...

>>59972525
>having to unplug your phone to plug in the touch id to unlock your phone

Also, has anyone thought about the implications of this?
It has been said that the Touch ID is linked to the secure enclave or phone is some other way in the factory but if this is going to work then it must be bypassing this secure pairing in some way, which means that there is some "master key" that gets past one of the primary security features of the device.

It really makes you think what else could be backdoored in the security of the iPhone, and suddenly the whole Apple vs FBI case comes to light again.

>>59972645
I like Microsoft's hardware, but that's infomercial-tier.

>>59979490
I have a macbook and I love it but theres no denying the design has been shit in recent years

Next iPhone will be the death of Apple if it just copies Samsung. Honestly I don't know what they are doing, I could do better myself in some ways. Feels like there is no vision at all, they are just trying to ride off the Jobs successes as long as they can before people realize they suck now, or something.

>>59975721
VLC on iPhone is laughably bad. Shit crashes everytime and it doesn't allow you to delete videos on the device.

>>59982281
If you can't handle 2 minutes of not browsing the internet something needs a serious reevaluation

>>59979490
Macs have had good Aesthetics when Steve Jobs was around to make sure it made sense and looked good. But even now a days Google and Microsoft have been catching up design wise and have slowly surpassed Apple. I give it a year or 2 until Apple fires Tim Cook.

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>mom asks me to look at the specs of the apple laptop she's about to buy
>go to the website
>literally no specs
>only comparisons to the previous models
>120% faster graphics
>17% thinner
>25% more colors
>2.5x louder bass
this is fucking ridiculous

>>59978446
you act as if you wouldn't expect something like this from apple, the company who ditched headphone jacks on their memephone for toothbrush heads with bluetooth

Why is the finger scanner such a big deal? Just trash that useless shit or stick it on the back who the fuck cares.

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>>59984726
>Macs have had good Aesthetics when Steve Jobs
are you for real?
Macs looked like ugly plastic children toys.

current Macs are best in class with Jonathan Ive's sleek metal vision realised.

>>59975875
This but I rather have a windows phone if they finally make a good one.

Also sucks not having imessage.

>>59973174
>wireless mouse
>better overall experience

People actually believe this.

>>59972758
The design is superior to your ideas about port placement.

you ruin the battery by leaving it plugged in all the time. YOU ARE THE LITERAL NORMIE CANCER YOU THINK YOU DESPISE!

>>59985260
Wow so add a setting so it doesn't charge until it reaches 20% if it really matters. Or make the battery user replaceable (kek apple will never do this because fuck users)

>>59985196
G3 iMac and iBook was kino tier design.

Apple's current design is simply dull and lifeless, not even good industrial design when compared to Google and M$.

>>59973125
Seconded. Steve Jobs is rolling over in his grave.

>>59981467
>Also is it true that new iphone models don't have a 3.5mm audio port?
false

>>59985662
>false

Wrong.

>>59977201
>CLASSIC™
>EXECUTIVE™
>AERONAUT™

>>59985052
click on the "tech specs" page u dummy

>>59985787
>>false
>Wrong.

Incorrect

>>59977201
Speaking of Apple's billing, why the fuck can't I export (or even copy and paste) purchase history on iTunes?

>>59978569
Because they are gigakikes and if they move that money out of its current legal trickery state to spend it they'll ave to pay taxes

>>59978569
Thing is because applel's entire business model is based around dodging taxes to be profitable, ALL their cash is stashed overseas where they can't touch any of it or be heavily back taxed. So now they've taken out loans to cover their operating expenses that are almost as much as their "cash".

Applel is literally history's biggest bubble waiting to pop, and the appletard tears are going to be fucking delicious. :^)

>>59985196
Those looked pretty cool compared to beige boxes of that era.

>>59973174
This is why Apple is gay.

Also they can't fucking pick a port and stick with it. How long until they ditch the USBC meme for some other weird shit?

>>59975329
>t. Pajeet thinking that the Surface competes with the iPad
Nobody's buying surfaces.

I came here for the apple dongle memes, i'm disappointed

>>59978657
When people who have money talk about "cash" they are really talking about liquid assets including stocks, bonds, and other securities, Pajeet.

>>59988703
Dodging taxes makes you smart.

What do you feel virtuous when you give money to the IRS kikes so they can send it to your elected and / or appointed official's retarded brother in law who owns a gold-bricking government contractor?

If you pay taxes you're a schlub. There are perfectly legal wats to avoid it.

>>59989163
>t. mactoddler

>>59985142

No, I'm not a fucking mentally disabled autistic twat like you who doesn't understand understand SATIRE is and is clearly too tech illiterate to know what a tech company would and wouldn't do.

>>59988703

>babby's first business comprehension

Yes, 'bubble'.

>>59989751
Just bought one a week ago actually. It's nice to use an actual Unix operating system on a laptop.

>>59993045
>macshit
>unix

Good joke.

>>59993133
go away with your unix-like clones.
macOS is certified unix.
https://www.opengroup.org/openbrand/register/brand3627.htm

>>59973450
>literally a open standard
>TL Note: ITS FREE NIGGA
>isn't implemented

Just what I wanted. Thanks Apple.

>>59993754
open standard doesn't mean it's free.
there could be patents.

besides that, implementing it isn't free.

>>59972722
not true

>>59973370
how about you think that through:
that would mean youtube will give you webms
that would mean no more hardware acceleration
that would mean way worse battery life

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>>59977201
>platinum spice
hahahaha nice

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>>59972688
What does mossberg have to do with apple?

>>59993695
>literally a piece of shit knockoff of FreeBSD
>FreeBSD literally claims in legal section they are NOT unix
>mactoddler thinks his frankenstein abortion fruitOS just magically becomes unix overnight because apple buys a piece of paper

>>59982264
what sort of batteries does it use?

>>59994005
sop spreading bullshit about freebsd:
https://wiki.freebsd.org/Myths

>>59978325
> when the tard kid gets internet acess

>>59993922
ive always thought about making a setup like this. guy looks like a fag tho