Programming is a terrible profession. For one, you are not respected

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Programming is a terrible profession. For one, you are not respected at any normal company. You're known as 'IT' or 'tech' and everyone gossips about how disgusting everyone is in the department. Every day, some Alpha who probably does nothing at his job except get his secretary to suck his dick in his corner office cucks you into doing random bitch work, and then yells at you when it's not done by the deadline despite it being impossible to complete the work requested. Not only that, the code rarely works, your co-workers are smelly Indians brought in by Tata Consultancy and connive to replace your job at all times for half the salary, and the work never, ever ends. You pollute your body with sugar and toxins, deprive it of sleep, and let it rot while you sit the majority of the day, neglecting any healthy exercise, social interaction or life goal attainment. It's like a Postal worker, but coupled with feelings of patheticness, lonliness, helplessness, rage and total hopelessness.

Women, when they hear you are a programmer, instantly remove you from the potential pool of mates as they know your earning potential is maxed early and your career over at 35. They are also instantly disgusted by you. It is far better to tell a woman you are on welfare than to out yourself as a computer programmer. It's also highly embarrassing for a woman to date or be married to a programmer, as virtually everyone knows they are the grown up version of the hopeless virgin in high school. One who never really grew up and became normal and fit into society, but rather found an environment where he could escape the reality of his situation and be invisible, able to hide the toxic shame and utter humiliation that is the programmer.

After Dentists, programmers have the highest rates of mental disorders, especially depression and suicide.

Programmers, why haven't you taken the cyanide pill?