You're not a real programmer unless you know >assembler

Python

name one (1) program written in haskell that anyone has ever heard of

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>>assembler

>>57922734
xmonad

>>57922734
Many of facebook services like spam detection run on Haskell.

That's nice, retard.

>>57922769
>Many of facebook services like spam detection run on Haskell.
They don't.

>>57922775
kys pajeet

>>57922704
>You're not a real programmer unless you know
>>assembler
>>c

Fixed.

>>57922769
Is that why facebook is filled with spam?

>>57922704
You're not a real programmer unless you can finish a job in any language required to do it on time and on budget.

Picking languages like that is fundamentaly stupid.

you're not a real programmer unless you're paid to do it

>>57922704
While I would argue that in order to be a programmer you must have the knowledge to program computers at the most fundamental level, which requires a working knowledge of the relationship between an assembly dialect and the machine's ISA, I'm not sure why it's particularly important to know or care about functional programming in general.

>>57922823

B T F O
T
F
O

>>57922882
this

>>57922704
I guess I can manage.

>>57922704
so everyone who studied CS is a good programmer ? because those languages are mandatory for every CS student.
except lisp maybe, but most will get in touch with it anyway

>>57922775
https://code facebook com/posts/745068642270222/fighting-spam-with-haskell/

that is all, my indian friend in denial

>>57922734
WhatsApp's server side

>>57922704
No true Scotsman fallacy invoked by OP

>>57922823
No, it's because you follow junk pages that are flooding your news feed with trash.

You're not a REAL man unless you know:

>how to build your own car
>can bench more than your bodyweight
>got a 6 pack that isn't a result of just being too skinny
>a beard

>>57922704
ayyy now i know all that thanks college

>>57923217
still mostly spam

>>57923229
>a beard
I might not be able to grow a beard but I'll die with a full head of hair on my head. 3/4 ain't bad.

>assembler

>>57923006
Some web"""devs""" don't

>>57923006
>because those languages are mandatory for every CS student.
They're not. Haskell is bullshit, and Lisp is not obligatory (but you'll learn Scheme/Racket if you do the functional programming course which is an electable [I didn't]).

>>57922751
>"""programmers""" who can't invert a binary tree in assembler

>>57923397
they are, theres usually a operating system programming class, where you program in C, a compiler development class and a microcontroller programming class where at least some parts are have to be written in assembler, a functional programming class which usually uses haskell as an example, logic programming classes with prolog, et etc

what language was your functional programming and advance functional programming class taught in ?

>>57922734
Ghc, the Haskell compiler

I do own books about all four, so I can at least pose as a real programmer.

And God bless the person who invented shorts + pantyhose.

>>57922704
>functional languages
Why.
>>57923451
That's actually really easy.

>>57922823
nah, it just lazy.

>>57923006
Most CS programs (note were talking CS and not Software engineering like some retards might think because they view CS as a category of programs) barely teach programming. You learn matlab, C, C++, java or python. Then the rest is algorithms and math.

It's never about programming.

>>57922704
Fuck. Their jawline is better than mine.

>>57923492
>assembler
>assembler
S T O P YOU FUCKING IDIOT
call it what it is, x86, x86-64, ARM, MIPS, whatever

>>57924055
so when you learned about type theory you didn't get to implement things in different languages to seem them applied in praxis ?
you've never implemented a knowledge based system but just learnd about it in theory ?
then your CS curriculum surely is lacking

>>57924071
Why? He's talking about a general set of machines and comparing it to a language intended for different platforms.

He can't accurately specify it. You God damned retard. Maybe his CS course taught ARM. But assuming ARM is enough of a norm to say that people learn arm over asm is just stupid.

>>57922704
Are their dicks cute?

>>57924170
No in my specific circumstance we wrote our own languages and implemented the features we learned about. Not all of it, some stuff was pure theory but still.
The point is that CS degrees differ a lot. But most certainly don't prepare you to be a software developer. You're primarily an academic professional. As the name implies.

You can't compare SE knowledge of programming to CS knowledge of programming. You're just being deceived if you think CS students are taught programming well. And yes plenty of CS students go on to have programming jobs. But that's really a huge waste as most CS students will find. They usually go into a profession where their knowledge exists barely used. SE (or any software development degrees I'd imagine) on the other hand have been taught things that suit their career very well.

>>57924242
i'm not comparing CS to SE.
and i'm not saying that CS students are taught programming, but they use different programming paradigms (and languages) as fucking tools to prove different things and implement the stuff they learn in theory.
they teach you 1 fucking language and expect you to be intelligent enough to learn another language enough to proof something.

>>57922704
>tfw fell for the assembly meme
>have to swim through spaghetti every day

I'm glad my company is switching to C.

>>57924286
That certainly doesn't sound like the initial point made.
>here's a list of languages good programmers know
>"oh so basically CS people are good programmers"
But you could easily go through CS only knowing C as your practicing language. You'd probably need to know how to read assembly sort of ok. But that'd really just be a 30 minute session of looking at some disassembly and then you look up instructions when you need to. One of the very convenient things about asm. Extremely light when it comes to learning to read it.

>>57924311
>That certainly doesn't sound like the initial point made.
because it was sarcasm ....

>>57924321
Well I'd probably say you're lying now. Ive re-read >>57923006
And really the sarcasm-find-o-tron doesn't give any readings. It looks entirely serious. I'd probably view it as a CS student masturbatory post in isolation.

>>57924311
to clarify that >>57924321

OP said
>You're not a real programmer unless you know
and i replied with
>so everyone who studied CS is a good programmer ?

because they got in touch with those languages and some point and at least know them.
OPs post is pure bullshit though.

>>57924181
then call it asm or assmebly
it's not fuckin called assembler

>>57924371
People often call it assembler. It's a valid alternative spelling and pronunciation. No clue on the history of it.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Assembly_language
In my native language it's assembler as a standard. Assembly would sound stupid.

I love these girls, can anyone share webms?

>>57923451
What the fuck is a binary tree?

>>57922845
this t b h

>>57922704
See that, programmers? That's the closest you'll get to a woman that isn't your mother.

you're not a real programmer unless you know

>japanese
>the script of at least one yuru yuri episode
>how to edit xresources

>>57925202
> because people don't know how to fix their PCs themselves
let's face it, they don't even try.

>>57925398
its a tree with two

x86 assembly is a hell I wouldn't wish on anyone. It's almost as bad as Java.

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>>57922704

>>57925633

What's with this "Java is bad" meme? Plenty of people in both academics and industry use Java.

Researchers use Java; HDFS, one of the industry standard in storage platforms for performant distributed computing, is written in Java; hell, Google's internal infrastructure for distributed computing is written almost entirely in Java. When you spout this "Java is kill" mantra, do you realize that reality contradicts you entirely?

>>57922704
I know all of those and I'm still not a programmer, I can't write for shit, also haskell's not my favorite by a long shot, it lacks the power of low level languages and the elegance of lisp, it's basically python for math nerds

>>57923188
pretty sure thats erlang

>>57922823
>be anon
>have a fb account to actually seem normal
>anon didn't unfollow his "friends"
>anon gets flooded with spam

don't be like anon, unfollow your friends.

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>>57922823

>>57923217
>>57925965
> the program isn't working
> it must be the user's fault

>>57922845
OP, being unemployed, needs self validation (that he doesn't get from his parents because they, rightfully so, see him as a failure and total family disappointment) by showing that he knows something on a Chinese underwater basket weaving forum.

OP either hasn't finished school yet, is a Javascript developer or actually has autism. In any and all cases OP is a fag who shit posts on /g/ and is the cancer that has killed/g/

>>57923451
it's assembly language you fucking retard.

I can write in compiler hurr fucking durr

>he didnt learn lisp in his intro course
Good luck with your worthless CS education

I only know php, javascript and sql
Yet i earn more than 90% of programmers

>>57923513
slayed

>>57922704
a bitch with a dogs face

>>57922768
>that anyone has ever heard of

>>57923229
hey I know a beard..

>>57922704
who are those slav qts

>>57922768
>>57922775
>>57923188
>>57923513
Ugh, come on guys.

>>57922734
>name one (1) program written in haskell that anyone has ever heard of
Pandoc, very common in academia

>>57922704
Who are these cum dumpsters?

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>>57922704
And you're not really interested in computer history if you haven't coded in
>COBOL

>forth

>>57922704
>haskell

how is this useful exactly? The other ones kinda make a little bit of sense at least but haskell? Nah

>>57922704
>programmer

i spelled "code artisan" wrong

>>57925940
And you're right about that

>>57922845
>>57922882
Pretty much this

>>57928111
It looks pretty.

>Brainfuck

>>57922704
i had to learn haskell at uni. normies hated the shit out of it (they're incapable of logical thinking after all), but it was pretty cool

>>57922704
>You're not a real programmer unless you know
>>c
>>lisp
that's true though

>>57922704
assembler and pulling off float/double/SM/SD/NB/(2/4/8/16)'s complement operations in head and on paper is standard at second year of my polytechnic, do people in america learn this stuff at computer science too? or is it only OOP bullshit with some C perhaps

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>>57922704
I know Java, Python, and Lua. That's close enough, right?

>>57922734
The verified version of the seL4 microkernel

>>57923229
Tfw half a man.

>>57922704
Thank fuck i'm not a programmer

>>57927834
>very common in academia
that makes it worthless, though

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>>57922704
They are twins

>>57928001
search
>dziewczynka17

>>57923229
>building a car
>hard

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PCSNCs7bwCw

>>57922704
>Assembler
What processor?

>>57922704
You had me up until

>haskell

Lmao.

>>57922734
And for something you haven't heard of, quite a few algorithmic model generators for financial modelling.

>>57933911
>it doesn't count if you just get an engine, a transmission, and weld some steel into a chasis to fit it in.

might as well call putting a frozen lasagna in the microwave: Cooking

>>57922704
i learned 6502 assembly (and actually got a sprite moving on a C64) and i know a bit of C and common lisp

can i still be considered one

>>57922775
Rajesh, my son. Poo in street.

Then drown in it.

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>>57928035
Wait a minute... Vice told me that blacks were discriminated against back then. What's a nigger doing near a computer and in a formal outfit?

>>57924399
The assembler is what takes an assembly file and translates it to object code.

>>57925398
Fuck off ranjit

>>57935946
he was probably doing what was considered shitty menial tasks at the time, like putting in punch cards

that's what women did too

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>>57935946
They were pushing diversity back then too. They strategically placed a nigger, a chink, a beaner and a woman in these photos.

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>>57922845
This
>>57922704
Gtfo

>>57927834
This is a good answer. I use pandoc very often.

>>57925458
this

>>57936099
The woman is Admiral Grace Hopper, USN.
If she thinks you're OK, you're OK.

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>A women invented COBOL
It really shows too kek

>>57922704

You're not a retard retard retard bullshit if
>>>>"assembler"
>general shit like c
>random choice
>look at me, I sure did read SICP!

>>57922790
>Fixed.
>Assembler
You didn't fix shit.

>>57936690

Even Miss Admiral Grace Hopper was only a woman.
And she knew damn well that black guys.. uhm.. have certain assets that could be useful. Don't judge her for bringing this nog to the ship, those navy trips are pretty long and boring, you know?

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>>57938409
>implying Grace Hopper ever served on an actual warship

>>57922823
damn!

>>57926656
>he doesn't program in linker

>>57932645
Will they burn in hell now? /:

>>57940304

Sorry to burst your bubble, but 4chan IS hell.

You aren't a real programmer unless you program with turing machines.

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>>57922704
how to write a program that performs its intended purpose - that's the literal definition of programmer

you're not a professional programmer unless you get paid to write software - quit tugging your dicks about whether tool x or y is superior and just solve some problems or create shit

>>57923188
that's erlang playboy

>>57936750
ITT salty neckbeards that don't know programming used to be considered secretarial bitch work

>>57932645
source now

>>57922704
Hehe, yeah you are totally right. Assembler is my favorite language as a programmer.

>>57922734
People that use Haskell are unlikely to ever make anything usable by a normal human being.

I know Facebook does some stuff with it.

>>57922704
your programming ability is dictated by what you make not what languages you know.

>>57922704
All of your meme functional programming languages run on interpreters written in C.

>>57922845
People like you produce crappy, unmaintainable code just to meet short term goals. Thanks for contributing to the tech debt of the world.

>>57922704
Someone's opinion of you does not have to become your reality.

>>57939544
Interpreter is the only way to go my man.

>>57922704
why the fuck lisp?


The syntax is cancerous even to read, i imagine writing in it.

>>57943433
its really easy once you get the hang of it.

>>57922704
I agree with this.

>>57922704
I learned MIPS Assembly in one of my classes at the basic level. Is it something I should be actually pursuing, or can I just move on with my life?

>>57932645
Are they kissing or trying to eat each others mouth?

>>57932645
more!

c is character building

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>>57943433
>lisp?
>The syntax is cancerous

>>57922704
cant be a man cause he doesn't smoke the same cigarettes as me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rz5wgNrUTVo

>>57935036
they probably didn't use a transmission and plenty of manufacturers get engine and chassis from other companies.
Also electric engine are pretty simple there is no reason to not outsource them unless you are the most autistic German engineer.

>>57940472
>reasonable anon
Is that a miracle?
Or it's just a mirage?