Sup /g/, /fit/ here. I was recently hired to be a software developer

>>54887048
Are you a fembot?
If yes, no need to, just make sure you look somewhat dickable.

Else you are fucked, learning how to google would be your best bet.

>>54887048
Which requirements are you fulfilling

>>54887048
Are you me?

I got hired as a developer after sitting around playing games for a year after graduating university (compsci). I had literally no work experience, never had a job, did no internships, did no coding outside of school, never had sex, etc. My resume stated all of this as well. The only reason I think I got hired was because I was able to check off minority in the application, and I am only half a minority.

You learn mostly on the job. Just Google and browse source control to learn.

First, install linux without a graphical user interface (would recommend debian). Get familiar with the interface, and get a hello world working. Doable in a week.

c++ in a week :'). Try to minimize the memory leaks, and get familiar with pointers.

>>54887048
Why are those pancakes so thick? They look kinda weird

Oh op that's definitely not going to happen if you don't know any other language. It just pisses me off that someone like you can get a job just because.

>>54887448
If I remember right they cooked them within a rice cooker for that extra thickness.

>>54887456
correct

>>54887199
>install linux without a graphical user interface
your opinion has been discarded.

>>54887048
Get ready getting fucked.
Because thasts what you got hired for.

>>54887456
>>54887477

Guys elaborate please, or support me with source because they look unnatural but still tasty.
Rice cooker clearly boiles them but how do they turn them brown? Were they fryed before or after cooking?
Fuck OP, need answers!

Don't worry, if you're a woman you don't actually need to do any work since they can't fire you.

>>54887186
>never had sex
>my resume stated all of this
uhmmmmmm

>>54887048
>How do I learn C++and Linux in a week?
C++:
-pick a beginner IDE (Code Blocks, Eclipse, Netbeans, whatever you like)
-go through the tutorials linked below:
http://www.cplusplus.com/doc/tutorial/
http://www.cprogramming.com/tutorial/c++-tutorial.html
http://www.learncpp.com/

Tada, done.

Linux:
-it is an OS. Anyone with 50+ IQ can operate any modern OS.

File: 1446091139129.jpg (62KB, 516x339px) Image search: [Google]

62KB, 516x339px

>>54887964
>IDE

>>54887976

>writing an application using only a notepad
>Building a brick wall using only mud

>>54887953
That explains why he was hired

>>54887048
>How do I learn C++and Linux in a week?
You don't. Enjoy being fucked for life because you lied on a resume.

>>54887902
http://en.rocketnews24.com/2014/06/14/how-to-make-epic-pancakes-with-your-japanese-rice-cooker/

Probably better ways but I'm just giving a general link.

>>54887048
>How do I learn C++and Linux in a week
You can't learn C++ in a week unless you're a fucking genius

>>54887048
Just make your own language if you can't learn C++ in a week :^)

>>54888172
great thanks!

Now i only need a japanese rice cooker. Anybody knows if it works the same as normal steam cooker?