>theme plays >cheering >/fit/ is filmed in front of

>>42873319
Every woman on earth becomes lesbian to eliminate the risk of ending up with one of us fucktards

>>42873332
Hahaha, what a story Mark.

>>42873319
Gay orgy.

>>42873347
NOOOO I CAN HEAR IT IN HIS VOICE!
MAKE IT STOP, HUUUUUUU

>>42873319
Pretty much everyone left.
Zyzz, Tiny, Scooby
Who cares?

>bunch of healthy young men enter
>introductions happen, conversation flows
>scene darkens
>"2 weeks later"
>apartment is trashed
>theres a huge pit in the corner of the room where all the guys under 6'2 abide in
>giant cardboard shrine with pictures of zyzz
>creatine rocks all over the floor
>squat racks fill the rest of the apartment

>>42873489
Hahah chicken Peter, you are just a little chicken. Cheep cheep cheep cheeeep cheeep cheeeeeeeep

>blackout
>2 spots come up
>under the stage right light, there is a barbell loaded with lmao4pl8
>on stage left, a man in gym shorts, socks, and a hoodie
>he is looking down at his feet, while there is a faint song playing through his headphones
>he looks towards the audience, a slight panic crosses his face
>"oh, h-hey," he takes out his headphones
>"w-what? the bar? no, im not... using... actually i was about to diddly that. s-sorry. i know this place is kind of busy"
>the man shuffles awkwardly in place, appearing to be counting down in his mind
>"i'll be done in 52 seconds if you can hold on"
>he turns towards the bar and methodically walks his way towards it, continuing to count down
>"mrmmhmmhrmmm a peanut" he mutters to himself
>"im fuckin zebra"
>he takes out his phone, a projection of his phone background, a picture of miia is displayed on the scrim, he stares at his phone as his breath quickens
>he strongly places his phone back in his pocket, the projection fades
>he stands firm and ready, grabs the bar
>he gets into position, attempts to lift, when he suddenly screams in agony
>he falls to the floor, writhing, cursing
>he pulls himself up to a chair with all his might
>he catches his breath slightly, still grunting in pain
>he turns to the audience
>"we were all told we were going to make it. that we needed all the milk, that humanity was worth leaving behind, that our squats would deliver us from our feels, there were mires to be had, and that we really werent homos. we prayed to the gods that left us by their own hands, and we destroyed our bodies thinking we were building something worthwhile. mine is yet another tale of these trials, and the curses that await many who attempt them. mine is a tale leading to this day, where all that i worked for was lost in the blink of an eye. this is the day-- when i arrived at... snap city..."

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>>42873319
>its another 30 minutes of anon masturbating episode

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>its the Rich Piana dies episode

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>>42873319
>Guys! I have a negative canthal tilt! I will never get a girlfriend!
*laughter*
>kys
*laughter*
*manlet enters from stage right*
>Guys, I just squatted 95lbs!
*laughter*
>Did you remember to clean out the gym falcon eggs?
>Uhh... UH OH! I GOT TO GO!
*laughter and clapping*
>He has 7 brain cells, one for each inch over 5 feet he has
*riotous laughter*

>>42873498
This.

These are dark days, the end times.

Feels cold.

It would be some virgin making up e-stats

>*ghost Piana appears*
GOOOOOOOOD FUCKING MORNING
*applause*

>>42873896
Oh shit. Now I'm imagining a /fit/ version of Hamlet where the ghost is the Pianoman

*wojak appears with a sugar free monster*
>ahh the first sip
*frog appears
>gib monster gf
*no laughter, just arguments over youtubers and praises of dead drug users

>guest star Jason Blaha
>he's smaller than everyone on the show

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>it's an anon doesn't get to do squats because the rack is being used by other people episode