>tfw ex gf posted a photo with her new boyfriend who is a

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>tfw ex had a bad bipolar crack up after we separated and I feel bad about how shitty her life has got

>>42722029
at least your ex wasn't going on off with your for 2 years and in a relationship with you for another half year the suddenly out of the blue told she doesn't want it

>>42722070
>>42722095

Shit guys..why relationship gotta be so complicated? How do I compeltely turn off my emotions for women?

I really wish I could see women as sexual objects and nothing more.

>>42722112
don't man all we gotta do is cherrish the memories, only thing we can do

>>42722029
maximum pl8s bench press + suicide grip

what a bunch of faggots

>>42722147

Your comment made me feel better desu. Only faggots get sad over women. Instead we should focus on gains and money making.

>My first gf cheated on me
>Most recent ex also cheated on me with a close friend even
>Only two serious relationships both ended with them cheating on me
>They both seem way happier than me
Why the fuck is this fair? Like, how the fuck does that balance out?

>>42722226
They clearly don't give a fuck about other people's feelings, which is the only way to be truly happy.
>>42722029
I can't remember who said it OP but "the best way to get over a girlfriend is to find another one"

>>42722226

stay strong, friend. i know how you feel. keep pushing on.

>>42722029
deadlifts are the manliest lift, do some with your 50% max concentrating on speed
then do some curls for the pump

>tfw dumped ex gf after her mom died and felt fucking terrible so I started dating her again out of pitty

>>42722239
>They clearly don't give a fuck about other people's feelings
not him, but, doing this while being in a relationship with someone is a really shitty character

Cut off all contact with ex lovers. Call me old fashioned but keeping in contact with an ex in only asking for trouble.

>>42722226

What makes you think life should be fair. Life is chaos. In a thousand years we will all be dead and no one will give two fucks that we ever lived. Stop giving a shit about things that don't matter.

>>42722275
what if the ex didnt even mention that they dont want any contact

>>42722286

He didn't mean it for the benefit of your ex you twat

>>42722300
you "twat" that is not what i was asking

>>42722286
Cut them out anyway.
When you break up, you two go back to being strangers, you push her/him out of your life so you can get on with the grieving process and getting your shit together. Seeing how they are doing only halts the healing.

>>42722305

How much of a beta faggot are you? You should probably start eating a vegan diet and doing lots of cardio so you can achieve trap mode and then be some fags pretend gf

>>42722313
that is what i'm thinking, yet she hasn't even remotely adressed that we should stop communication
>>42722314
it's ok anon

>>42722119
Fuck, now I'm crying like a bitch

>>42722029

What lifts? Dick raises 1xF with n+1 hoes

>>42722343
i have been for the past days anon... so i reallyfeel you

>>42722070
>>42722095
I didn't want to remember these feels.

>>42722331

I'm not the one crying over some failed relationship. I'm married with kids and I have no reason to think of the women I was with in the past. Being hung up on the past is the biggest obstacle people face when trying to enjoy the present or building a worthwhile future. The only thing in life worth giving a damn about is your children anyway...

>>42722381
that is nice for you anon and i want that too but many of us don't have that and that makes us sad, a lot

>>42722112
Nice Rush get.

>I really wish I could see women as sexual objects and nothing more.
I don't think you really do, I think that, like many people, you have been hurt. Life is very rough, life is suffering and it will KILL you with absolute certainty.

he's a meme, but I think this is a good video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KjpuxiV-_Es&t=0

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>be dating gf
>break up
>both of us were convinced we were going to get married and that we'd get back together after breakup
>stay in touch with her, but get weird when she stops talking to me as much as i wanted to talk to her
>block her on social media
>she blocks me
>delete everyone in our shared circle, block all of her close friends, untag myself from pics with her and delete the poster, move to another state
>tear up cards she gave me and throw out her presents
>mfw there's no way for either of us to know what the other one is up to

>>42722464
>>mfw there's no way for either of us to know what the other one is up to

this is what makes me so sad

>>42722387

Women don't want a sad cunt. They want a sick cunt. Get over the bullshit. Stop focusing on all the reasons you miss her and start focusing on all the reasons you broke up. If she was perfect and the one, you wouldn't be alone right now. Almost 4 billion women on the planet and you think she is the only one who could make you happy? You're fucking miserable because of her. This kind of shit only gets better when you let it get better. You can't heal a broken heart when you're constantly plunging an emotional dagger into it.

>>42722511
>Women don't want a sad cunt
that i know
she wasn't perfect by all means, but i liked her despite the bad sides

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>She leaves you and is another relationship in two months and seems a lot happier in it
>It's been over a year and you still feel like shit

>>42722464
>move to another state


Nigga did you have to move to another state because of a break up?

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>>42722527
>>It's been over a year and you still feel like shit

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>>42722095
Are you me?

>>42722605
if so, you might understand why i'm upset

>>42722029
have a wank and you won't give a shit about her after

>>42722622
for at least 2 minutes yeah

>>42722070
At least she didn't have a breakdown and try to cast a spell on you over skype (in text) because she couldn't handle a bit of post breakup friendly sex

>>42722609
I'm still angry about my ex leaving me in the trash... but at the end of the day she was probably letting somebody outside the relationship influence her. I don't think getting in a relationship in the 21st century is worth it. Most women 18-25 are thotty and anything over that is probably blown out pussy.

>>42722684
>but at the end of the day she was probably letting somebody outside the relationship influence her.
exactly what i'm thinking

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>>42722689
The problem is that women either

A. See other women around them at different stages of their life and compare those women's relationships with their own

B. Women in relationships take advice from single women

C. Women in relationships take advice from single men

That's typically what I witness and it never affects the woman's relationship in a positive way

>>42722762
and its shit

tfw ex is going to move in the first time with some other guy sometime down the road
>not with me
fuck this

I met a girl that I really clicked with but she has bipolar disorder and aspergers.
On the one hand, aspie women aren't dreadful and lack some negative feminine traits, but on the other hand those are bad genes.
What do?

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>>42722226

Wow, are you me anon?

>>42722527
Nigga try this:
>She leaves you and is in another relationship in 2 days and seems a lot happier in it

>>42723068
>>42722527
reading your posts the absurd reason my ex gave me "i realized that i have no feelings for you any more and dont want the relationship" literally means she found someone else

nothing else

fuck
that

Tissue to face lifts 1xRiver

Worlds smallest violin curls 1xFailure

Oh wait you're already a failure

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>>42722527

i believe she's on vacation with her family now and i'm literally thinking about texting her what i couldn't tell her during the breakup call which only took 4 minutes
come to think off it, who breaks up via phone after half a year of relationship and 2 years on and off, dating before that for half a year in under 4 minutes

>>42722239
>ex broke up with me half a year ago because "we can't have children because you don't want them to become christians"
>find a few sluts
>find 22yr old qt blonde med student, who's crazy into me and not a slut
>still want my ex back

fuck
me

also going to meet my ex tomorrow for coffee, which will inevitably end up with her telling me that nothing has changed and she still doesn't want to be with me

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>Find new gf
>She's older, not as smart, not as funny, not as fun to talk to and not even remotely close to being as attractive as my ex
>Only went for her because I literally didn't have anyone else interested
>Feels like shit because I can't stop comparing her to my ex, who was by all accounts a pretty much perfect girl
>24 years old, only been in two (counting this one) really short relationships, can't stop feeling like I missed out
>Can't stop feeling like I ruined my chances at a happy life

>>42723293
>also going to meet my ex tomorrow for coffee,
how did you do it

>>42723309
Not similar except for age and relationship experience if it's any consolation I think you eventually adopt a happiness is subjective attitude or kill urself lol

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>>42722973
>leaves boobytraps for the cleanup crew

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>>42723293
>tfw meeting my ex tonight for drinks
>tfw I want to ask her why she ghosted me

I'm not expecting her to come back. I just want to know really what happened that last month we were together. I know I might not like the answer, or it could even taint my image of my relationship with her forever, but I want closure.

Good news is that all these feels are making for an awesome chest day. Shame my gym crush ain't here

>>42723319
I just messaged her

Still convinced that my chances are 99-1 that she'll be too stubborn to go back on her decision but I have to at least try

>>42723378
what did you text her exactly, need to know for a friend

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>>42722226

You are unhappy because you are an underdeveloped person that doesn't even know it yet. You probably still believe that you are entitled to happy relationships and don't know why you can never have one.

1
>because you have grown from the experience yet

Maturing from this would teach you that this was a good thing; losing a person that would rather cheat on you than tell you what you did wrong is a blessing.

You would also use this experience to reflect on your behaviors that contributed to you being so low in her mind as to disrespect you like this.


2
>because they haven't grown either

A person that would cheat instead of going to their partner and first trying to tell them what they could do better isn't very developed either. An important thing you do in a relationship is hone each other into better people so that you continuously improve each other's well-being
Get to work, bucko. You have a lot of self reflection to do.

>>42723385
>Hey, how are you doing?

things went from there and I asked to grab a coffee the day after

>>42723427
huh, alright. thats not gonna work on my end then
best of luck to you then anon and if there is a slight chance, take it

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>TFW GF breaks up with you because you won't move in with her
>TFW you won't move in because she broke up with you two weeks before that
>TFW she breaks up with you once every two weeks then comes crawling back with an apology saying she'll change
>TFW its been going on for years
>TFW you're literraly insane because you keep doing the same thing and expecting a different result
>TFW you can't even look at her because you know what's coming in the near future
>TFW all you can think about now is banging sloots
>TFW she has your doggo

Just end me bros

>>42722279
Cringe

>>42723434
>>TFW she breaks up with you once every two weeks then comes crawling back with an apology saying she'll change
>>TFW its been going on for years
are you not seeing the problem here

>IT'S YET ANOTHER "OBSESSED WITH GIRLS" POST ON FIT

You "men" on here are among the most pathetic of human society. It's almost imcomprehensible how obsessed with women you all are

>>42723465
Oh I fucking see it!

>>42723434
lol sounds borderline as fuck.
also:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_supply

that is you my friend.

>>42723494
Borderline?

hey fit just curious

Do you guys ever talk about anything on this board besides crying about ex girlfriends, girls you want to date, girls you want to fuck, or anything besides girls?

Why are all of you so obsessed with girls? Never seen anything like this.

You'd think that considering everyone on fit is a genius, rich, ripped, etc that you wouldn't care so much

>>42723507
fit is THE most normal bord on 4chan anon, if anything you can get good advice from here

>>42723507
what's so strange about wanting to be loved?

>>42723506
https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/borderline-personality-disorder/index.shtml

good idea to learn about it, it'll help you see the red flags to get away from these crazy fucks before they sink their hooks in you.

>>42722535
do you not understand how autistic the guys on this website are?

the fact guys here respond the way they do to a breakup at age 19 makes me wonder how people so autistic get into relationships in the first place

then again the girls are probably just as autistic and ugly as the guys are

>>42723523
>fit is normal

laughing
my
fucking
ass
off

you people are more autistic and insecure than any other board on 4chan

>>42723539
>you people are more autistic and insecure than any other board on 4chan
if anything were the most human people board

>>42723530
*Bro tier fist bump*

>>42723554
it's surprising how little people know about it when it affects like 8%-11% of US women. educate yourself and you will save yourself from a lot of shit in the future, trust me it's worth it.

>>42723507
>Why are all of you so obsessed with girls?

Evolution?

Not sure what kind of answer you're expecting.

>>42723539
>you people are more autistic and insecure than any other board on 4chan
you've clearly never been to /r9k/

>>42723530
does belittling count? emotional abuse? if so my now ex did this to me for weeks...

>>42723585
just really sad to see how desperately obsessed with girls the teens on this board are

nonstop whining, crying, complaining, bitching about them

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>>42722762
DELET!!!
Someone I had a crush on hooked up with a guy whose life is an utter mess, yet every time we were alone she kept saying how so much better I am than him. Then if I called her out on it she said she is not ready for a proper relationship and is just messing with the guy.

I mean, what sort logic is that? Did she really expect me to wait it out?
>tfw the guy went back to his home country for the time being and she wanted to meet up immediately after that, even though I hadn't heard a word from her in weeks while he was around
It was hilarious how the guy got superbly jealous of every time she was around me though.

>>42722159
You know why your first reaction is to be sad? Because you want a meaningful emotional and physical connection with a woman. She wants to have it with you too. You're the perfect match. You know she's out there somewhere but you also know the odds of finding her are so fucking low. So you'll settle :(

>>42723614
teens? i'm 26 and my recent break up is making me feel like 18

>>42723614
Must be nice to be a faggot, right?

>>42723594

>belittling and emotional abuse
>weeks

heh. try years phamilia.

thankfully i feel like i'm making mental beginner gains. they're coming fast and furious

>>42723594
usually a typical borderline relationship starts with the borderline being completely infatuated with you, saying you are the "love of her life", "soulmate", "it was meant to be" etc etc. that's called the idealization phase. then they will devalue you, belittle, emotionally abuse (they are extremely manipulative), pretty much turn you inside out and make you believe you are crazy.

finally, they will discard you, not before finding a replacement and cheating on you. the cycle will repeat with the new guy, and it goes on and on.

>>42723625
well fuck me and i even texted her that i wanted to talk about everything again

what the fuck has gotten into me

>>42723636
>a typical borderline relationship starts with the borderline being completely infatuated with you, saying you are the "love of her life", "soulmate", "it was meant to be" etc etc. that's called the idealization phase. then they will devalue you, belittle, emotionally abuse (they are extremely manipulative), pretty much turn you inside out and make you believe you are crazy.
>
>finally, they will discard you, not before finding a replacement and cheating on you

holy
fucking

shit!?!?!?

this is EXACTLY what has happened to me, besides the replacement which i still believe has happened somehow though
holy
shit

>>42723639

you need a therapist bud. you have proven you can't handle this on your own. just go get one and heal

>>42723662
i need to cut this girl out of my life, for good. funny enough we met on 4chan, holy hell hole how could i have been so blind

jesus

>>42723615
>Did she really expect me to wait it out?

Yes. Alpha fucks, beta bucks. You're the fallback option.

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At least you dudes had gfs

>>42723658
congratulations, you got caught up with cluster-b love. it sucks, doesn't it? though it is a partial reflection of yourself, you may exhibit codependent behavior, which compels you to try to "help" or "rescue" or "fix" these insane human beings. work on yourself and you won't attract these kinds of people anymore.

if you are still affected by your relationship, i recommend doing some research on the illness as it should help you realize that these people are emotional 3 year olds and none of what happened is your fault.

i recommend reading this: http://gettinbetter.com/borderline.html

it actually scares me how little people know about this disorder, considering how nasty it is once you get involved with it.

>>42723679
>met on the chon

GTFO!!!!

>>42723624
I'm not even gay at all. It's just really depressing to see how upset you guys on here get over girls.

You see the same shit about girls all the time, how crazy they are, how they move onto the next guy like nothing while you guys cry about it, how all girls manipulate and do these games, yet you still get so invested in them

It's really sad to be honest.

>>42723679

are you the guy who said she has your dog? get your dog back first

>>42723691
>it sucks, doesn't it?
i'm literally speechless, i fell in love with her, i wanted to tell her that i love her after she dropped me
>or "fix" these insane human beings
yes, yes to this i really thought i could fix her

she realized it herself that she did this with her ex before too and told me she wanted to look into therapy, once she moved

just....wow

>>42723615
>being a human spare tire despite being an order of magnitude above the other guy in every category
I coped by moving on. Now that their ship is sinking the twiggy garbo is all "so when are you visiting :)"

Lmao nigga

>>42723589
/r9k/ is filled with autists who know theyre autistic but cant/wont change it.
/fit/ is filled with autists who will deny being autistc and just enjoy the endless self loathing. /fit/ is easily worse, at least /r9k/ produces some funny oc and there are reasonable people there, /fit/ is the exact same shit all over again. makes me wonder who participates in those threads anymore since there are 10 of them daily and there are literally no new thoughts

>>42723697
i wish i was kidding anon i wish but i am not, she used to browse /fit/
>>42723704
no dog involved in this story anon

>>42723636
Can those steps happen really fast? Cause one of my ex's went from loving me to breaking up and telling me I was a piece of shit in a month. It was like an overnight change. I mean I'm 100% sure her mom had BPD and that stuff is genetic right?

>>42723721
you probably tried to urge her to get into therapy, tried to help her with other shit (she prob had eating disorders, cutting, suicidal) etc. tried to solve all her problems for her. be her knight in shining armor!

if she truly was borderline, your relationship with her was like millions of others, they are usually nearly identical.

hopefully this gives you some closure though in case you are still hanging onto feelings. remember, the love you felt for her was real, but what she had for you was a twisted idea of love. once you realize everything she does is because she is emotionally a toddler (and i don't mean that as a joke), it becomes much easier to understand their insane behaviors.

>>42723703
>I'm not even gay at all

If that isn't a sign you're gay, I don't know what is. It's not a bad thing bro, just your sexual preference

>>42723691
> If it were, their behaviors and words would match, and you've had far too many contradictory instances that have made you doubt and distrust their verbal expressions of caring or affection. Add to this, as you love them more--paradoxically, they love you less.
god damn
this hits hard
>>42723751
not really she wanted to do that on her own, she did start again with a bit of cutting stuff but got over that herself
this whole thing is really giving the past 2 years a whole new perspective anon...

>>42723735
it can be genetic, yes, and usually if a parent has a personality disorder there is a very high chance that their offspring develops one too. absolutely it can happen that fast. usually they "fall" for you within like a fucking week, that's how sick it is. the thing you need to understand is borderlines think in "black and white" there is no grey. you are either ALL good or ALL evil. once she painted you to be a monster, every good time went out the window and in her eyes that's all you are.

so yes, definitely.

>>42723754
>so triggered by getting told you're pathetic for obsessing over girls this much that you're only response is UH UR GAY
>thinking that anyone who isn't so obsessed with girls is gay

>>42723754
hes right. you cant find any other place that would be this obsessed with girls. go to on any other board and they will laugh at you

>>42723764
>there is no grey. you are either ALL good or ALL evil. once she painted you to be a monster, every good time went out the window and in her eyes that's all you are.
literally what my ex told me, that she can't be something inbetween happy or sad, only one or the other and that if she decided to drop someone, that person is dead for her for ever and theres no in between too

>>42723773
Go to any other board and you're 100% a fgt.

>>42723780
>>42723761
yup, it's very interesting how these people can even exist, like living based SOLELY off of emotions, emotions = fact and that's it. no logic.

biggest thing for them though is they have a crippling fear of abandonment, i bet you guys got "don't ever leave me" a whole lot, right?

>>42722226
Living well is the best revenge, anon. Life is pretty sweet for women aged 18-25 but it will catch up with them eventually. Just stop dwelling on their happiness and focus on bettering your lack thereof

>>42723808
http://gettinbetter.com/fallout.html
dude i ... there is a lot of truth in this and comparing this with what i've experience
it's like 1:1

>i bet you guys got "don't ever leave me" a whole lot, right?
not once actually
but
she did have a whole lot of daddy issues, tried to get appreciation of her dad while she was a child, always acting tough and had more male friends in school than female

>>42723829

how long were you together?

>A Borderline can make you behave in ways that you never dreamed possible.

>ex dressed herself in a very, very revealing top without a bra
>sends me the pic
>i ask her the next night that it was kinda revealing
>she goes bitch mode about it

>>42723764
Some things make sense now. Her mom was always this passive aggressive sperg when was I was with ex. We went out to a movie for a few hours and she flatly accused my ex of abandoning her family just to fuck. And that's just the tip with her mother


Then there's me ex. She's had some problems in the past. (Eating disorder she was hospitalized for stands out) We had a great relationship, even when her mom started meddling. Then one week it went from flirty everyday talking to her practically ghosting me. It lasted a month and then we broke up and she told me she was better than me and not worth her time. It literally went through all the behavior you described. I tried to save her and while she seemed responsive at first, she just seemingly stopped caring over the span of a month.


Holy shit it kinda makes sense now.

>>42723838
actual relationship lasted nearly half a year. 2 years ago we dated for 6 months, followed up by on and off contact for over a year and the said relationship

just wow i'm still baffled reading through that text...

>found a girl I finally like enough to pursue
>depression and anxiety issues flare up at the same time
I don't want to say it's connected, but it probably is.
How do I deal with this?

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>>42723683
In my defense, eventually I did realize how she was manipulating with me and became absolutely apathetic towards her.
At that point she increased her efforts at trying to convince me I had a chance, but I just treated it all as a joke.
I'm pretty sure she hates me now though.

Anyway, what I mean by all this is to ask whether I handled the situation properly or not. All of this is very new to me. I think I'm still stuck in my beta mindset, yet I'm getting a lot more attention from women than before and I don't know how to handle it.

>THE PAST IS PRELUDE TO THE PRESENT.
this whole paragraph is spot on

anon thank you, no really, thank you for showing me this
it has opened my eyes a lot
i have been bawwing my eyes out the last couple of days because she broke up
but with this it totaly makes sense now
jeeeeeeeesus

>>42723829
>>42723841
>>42723847

yeah they are the products of lots of abuse in the past, and they develop these behaviors as a defense mechanism. i read something that behind their behaviors is a load of defense mechanisms akin to a prius engine trying to power the titanic.

remember BEST thing you can do is to go NO CONTACT, because as long as you are in their life, they will try to sink their hooks into you again and rip open all the old wounds. Cut all contact, go to therapy if you actually need it, learn about codependency and see if it relates to you (it is very common in bpd relationships) and improve yourself. these people were born to fail, you aren't.

>>42723897
stay strong my friend, it'll take time but when you look back on her, you will see an emotional toddler who is manipulative and evil, feel a little bit of pity, then move on.

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>>42722029
>catch ex cheating with some dude
>throw her out, break her phone, tell her to never contact me again
>she tries for several months before giving up (i ignore ever attempt)
>2 years later I would like to hear at least a fucking apology from her
>lose interest in any woman as soon as they start to return feelings

i just want to wake up to a message from her saying shes sorry ;_;

i dont even want to get back together, i never would. but fuck. the fact that she has left me alone either means she respects my wishes or has been with so many tyrone and chads that she forgot about me

>>42723930
>you will see an emotional toddler who is manipulative and evil, feel a little bit of pity,
thanks anon, best friend of mine told me to stay away from now on because she her behaviour is toxic

how come you're so well informed on this topic anon?

>>42723930
>remember BEST thing you can do is to go NO CONTACT,
i will my man
i certainly believe that i made her mad/sad by not crying at all when we broke up
wow

>>42723947

you're not over her yet. you need to not care if she apologizes or not who gives a shit. she is a big immature baby who cheated and can't be an adult. you don't need an apology form her retarded ass. you need to forget about her if it's 2 years already bro

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>meet super cute girl
>talk to her, text frequently
>same major and interests as me, seriously good vibes
>after two weeks ask if she's seen Baby Driver
>"Oh yeah I saw that the other day with my b o y f r i e n d"
>room starts spinning
Something similar happens every time I meet a girl. How the fuck do they all have bfs, and are they actually so oblivious that they don't think a guy chatting them up, flirting, and inviting them places is an indication of intentions?
Fucking hell
Also fucked up my elbow learning to clean and have to skip chest/tris tonight
Definitely not my week
Maybe it's God telling me to go for a run for the first time in forever

I don't mean to be a misogynist, but why is every woman I've had dealings with such a manipulative cunt? Is it just me? Do I just attract those nutcases for some reason?

>>42723948
i dated a girl who had it for 7 months, was so obsessed with her and fixing her that i did countless hours of research on her disorder. she fucked me over bad, like she had multiple serious relationships going at once and managed to hide it-bad. after i broke up with her, she literally had five relationships going at once. the breakup basically destroyed me even though i initiated it, and every time i felt sad i would research the disorder more and it would help.

i'm almost a month and a half out and i don't really think about her anymore, but when i read your post it kind of tipped me off to that kind of behavior and i thought i would try to shed some light. i really think people should be aware of personality disorders, because usually once you learn about them, it's too late. learn the red flags and symptoms and stay away.

>>42723966
I didn't, and still haven't, shed a single tear over that relationship ending. She said I was the coldest person she's ever met. and bro, you probably made her sad by something stupid like not texting back within 5-10 minutes, these ppl have no ends to their craziness.

>>42724021

you're easily manipulated if you don't leave at the first instance/sign. you're the only constant in these situations

>>42724022
don't know if it was that
she didn't have full on BPD but most of it
i believe she expected me to cry during the call, i didn't
but i have been crying the last couple of days and now i know this has been for all the wrong reasons
thank you, again!

>Get solid gf
>Realize years later that I am always happier alone
>gf wants to get married, i want to live alone
>Too much of a bitch to break up with her because she has literally nothing without me, 0 friends, shit job, no family. Will legit probably kill herself if i leave


Just jerk off to Chinese cartoons and focus on your career kids

>>42723874
Didn't read but it looks like a beta wall of text. Be more stoic.

>>42724050
according to the DSM-V, which psychologists use to diagnose disorders, borderline only requires five of the symptoms to have this disorder.

You're welcome, I'm glad that I was able to help.

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>>42722029
Hello OP, no lifts will help you but you can help yourself. Don't regret breaking up with her for whatever the reason is. Its over , keep walking forward. If you have regrets consider this. There are so many women that are way hotter, nicer and give better BJ than your ex gf. Be alpha focus on your career , body , hobbies. Doing just this will attract hot women in your life. I've been in your shoes and have come out a better man because of it.
No regrets.
Take action.

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Every man's ego takes a jab when a woman leaves--but a Borderline leaves you feeling guilty, ashamed, castrated, unlovable, emasculated, worthless, etc. You start believing that if she returns, you'll be able to get rid of these horrible sensations, and feel okay again. Once in awhile, your rational mind recalls the torment of that affair, and you're not certain you want that part of it again--but anything must be better than what you're feeling right now!

>>42724118
relationships with a borderline are like a crack addiction.
it's really really fun (wild fucking sex, they can make you feel like a god) but so bad for you.

As stated earlier, rebound relationships are extremely common among Borderlines, and leave men feeling used and discarded--but the same disturbing patterns that you wrestled with during this relationship, are replicated with other suitors. It's literally just a matter of time before they'll meet with a similar fate, and be suffering as you are. In short, your Borderline will not miraculously become normal or well with some other guy!

i have been her rebound a year ago then it was my turn

i can only imagine how her ex before me felt after 4 years with her

hot damn

>>42724199
>it's really really fun (wild fucking sex, they can make you feel like a god)
you have opened my eyes so fucking much anon, not exaggerating she literally told me me and her had the best sex ever, for over 2 years

>>42723636

Not the same guy you're already having a discussion with, but I'm almost affraid to look into this further, as I believe my ex fits the bill. Not an extreme case, but it explains a lot of things.

The whole thing, "you're the best ever/ why are you even interested in me/ this is the luckiest thing that happened to me/ ruined me, could never date another guy again/". I could remember more, probably. And it's not just words, she lived it, I felt it, and it was awesome because I liked her too, and then loved her. I still do.

She got me to open up emotionally, to put my trust in her, then deconstructed me over the years, piece by piece. I am way worse of (looks, confidence, mental fortitude, finances) in every way comparing to when we met. I was always kinda impressed by how silly/naive/dumb she can get, yet how she could manipulate the shit out of me at other times.

I keep thinking we broke up because we were bored of each other. But even with that, I still had a closeness with her, and she just... doesn't?
All my feelings for her, all the years we had are ingrained in me, I cannot rip them away because they are a part of me. She seems to have just carried ALL of our shit in a bag that she dropped in a dumpster the day we broke up. This I just cannot wrap my mind around.


Oh, and she did mention several times that she thinks she has issues that she doesn't understand. She even tried to get therapy soon after we started dating, but it wasn't private practice, so the guy just blew her off because he doesn't really have time for people who are not an immediate danger to themselves and the society. I also told her to chill out, grow up and just act like a mature person.


I ranted like a motherfucker, but this is scary shit and is making me explore a new perspective on shit I just can't seem to work out. Who did I sleep next to for years...

>>42724106
>24, 2 degrees
>fantastic career with good money
>lift 3 times a week
>still a virgin

It's because my hobbies are solo hobbies that dry up pussy like reading books and making quadcopters. What do I do, /fit/? Please help.

>>42723947

Had a toxic alcoholic ex and I feel the same way about her. I ignored her when she tried to contact me after I broke up with her, and now I wish she would try again. Don't know what I'd do, but I definitely still miss her.

>>42724231
same here, got the whole belittling, passive aggressive, no empathy towards me, "you're the best sex", mood swings from "let me tell you about funny stuff" to "i am hurt by what you said" in seconds, when something didn't go as she planned she'd be mad
list goes on

>>42724231
Yeah, they'll idealise you and make you feel like the person saving her from all of her abusive ex's, make you feel like a god, like you complete each other.

They will rip your boundaries down, borderlines cut through boundaries like butter, and you will spill your entire life's story to them. I told mine things that I had never told anyone else within 2 months of dating her.

You got devalued my friend, and I bet you tried extra hard to make the relationship work "just to get back to how it used to be!" because the Idealize phase was incredible.

As for your last few paragraphs, borderlines lack something called "object constancy". It's a skill we develop that they don't, which is basically 'out of sight, out of mind'. If a toddler is playing with a toy and they drop it under a table, they will forget about it until they develop that skill and realize that it didn't go away forever, it's just under the table. You are not in her mind anymore, her new victim is.

The person that you fell in love with, and slept with, no longer exists in this world. Borderlines have extremely unstable sense of selves, so they do something called "mirroring". They will pick up pieces of your personality and become that, kind of like a chameleon. She was mirroring you. Now that she has a new guy, she is mirroring him. She is like clay, when you were with her, that was the person you knew but she has molded to fit onto another guy and consume him. The clay is still there, but it's not the same mold you loved.

>Date a girl for 10 years
>Have an absolutely nasty break up
>Bump into her months later, she's looking great
>i'm also in the best shape of my life
>Hug her and chat for a bit
>No ill will, no feelings of regret
>Happy she's doing well for herself

Leave humanity behind!

You might have perceived a bit of 'craziness' early on, when she'd become disproportionately volatile about minor events that were troublesome to her. When she shared stories about (vilified) former boyfriends or lovers, you felt honored to be privy to these intimate revelations, while assuring yourself it would be different with you;


what the fuck man

she literally told me about this one guy she sort of dated and dumped in a really shitty way and wanted me to listen
i told her i didnt want to hear that kind of stuff because it made me think about how she could end up doing that to me
then she got upsed and told me "its just a story cmon its fun he deseved it in the end"

jesus fucking christ

>>42724313
>They will rip your boundaries down, borderlines cut through boundaries like butter, and you will spill your entire life's story to them
i told her in those first months of dating, years ago, stuff about my family i wouldn't have told a more or less unknown girl in over a year

how could i have been so blind

>>42724313
is there any hope that if i send her the website she reads about it herself?

>>42724199
>>42724226
once again
>all relationship rating is based on sex

pathetic

>>42724368
>>all relationship rating is based on sex
what? we're talking about a disorder anon

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>>42724252
>24 , almost medical licence
>good money
>lift 3-4 times a week
>not a virgin
The bedrock is there for you to achieve high status and get hot women.
Your hobbies dont get in the way , there is nothing hotter that a man who talks about what he like with passion. I have made a girl listen to me talk about the Halo storyarc for 3 hours after that she wanted to fuck me. You be the judge.
Go on youtube. Subscribe to these people and watch their shit. If interested i will post books and other shit.
Jason Capital
Charisma on command
Valentino Kohen

pic related its me

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>>42724291

>>42724305


Fuuuuuuck, while I typed my shit out, you guys kept going, and... what the fucking flying fuck, you're describing too much of shit that completely coincides with my experience. I know relationships are similar everywhere, but this is too much.

I was going to wife that. I still fucking love her. It was years for us, not months. And she is legit crazy? Like she will never be happy, it's just not possible? It ain't me, it never fucking was.

And yeah, all of that too, "best sex", and the whole "what you said hurt me", that shit was 90% of ALL of our major fights. Completely stupid shit I didn't even understood could or should be a problem.

>>42724329

stop fucking posting you loser. it's gone past the point of empathy at this point you're just redditposting in this thread over and over again

>OH. MY . GOD. U GUYS THIS IS EXACTLY LIKE MY RELATIOSNHIP!!

yeah we get it bro. go get help. go get help and move on okay

>>42724385
dude
i had the same wife thought with my girl, literally, i was looking past the bad things, past the belittling and gas lighting

this is blowing my mind anon, i have to crack open another beer hold on a sec

>>42723992
She just likes the attention, probably is texting multiple guys. Its a good thing it happened this way, you are better without her and you didnt spend money. In the future try to talk multiple women at once and always keep options open so stuff like this does not get to you

Reading all the BPD stuff is really making me regret making plans to go get drinks with my ex and catch up. Even though I'm pretty sure she's as crazy as her mother is, I'm not going to cancel a few hours before. I'll go but keep my guard up. I think she ghosted me now cause she does have BPD but I want to be sure. I want that closure.

Thank you to the anon posting all the BPD. Stuff, suddenly things make so much more sense

>>42724252
>quadcopters.
These are versatile as fuck.
Keep at it my man.

Best advice I can give you is to schedule a party vacation with friends if possible.
Here's my experience
>go to so-cal music festival
>break all-time records for alcohol, pot, and party drug consumption
>inhibitions get released
>temporary ego death
The day after the festival when I was sobering up I felt like a different person.
I even dropped some bad habits from that day on.
I was at the edge of leaving /fit/ and 4chainz altogether, that's how much clarity I had.
It's like I flipped a switch.

Next time if I go harder and live then I'll probably not return here.

I'm not asking you to become a temporary beacon of degeneracy to finally stop giving two shits about relationships but it's worth a try.

>>42724421
>Thank you to the anon posting all the BPD
if i could i'd buy him a beer, heck even a keg
literally made me stop crying and started realizing that i am in fact not the fault

You'll all be ok anons. I was in the same boat for a long time. For months I was in anguish, and then before I realized it, almost a year had passed and I the feelings left. I am sometimes left wondering what she's doing, but there's none of the heavy broken hearted feels anymore. You'll be ok

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>have bad experiences in the past in semi-relarionship stage that fucked me up
>meet girl who I went from giving the cold shoulder to being in love with
>had so many differences and things I got put off by but over time looked past then because she was genuine
>never had gf and this was the first time talking to someone who made me happy and was head over heels for me
>falls for someone else within weeks of me returning the feelings she wanted me to have for her
>it happens to be a friend I was cautious of
>block her and delete her off everything,
>her other friend tried to reach out, she does too.
>turn away her friend, ignore her message.
>they think I've an heroed
>back to tfw never had a gf


It never gets better. The gym session that day was one of my darkest

>all of my exes are now fat, feminists and/or single mothers.
Glad I dodged a couple of bullets there.

>>42724313

You're killing me. I have goosebumps. Honestly, I should be in bed, but I don't know how I will sleep tonight.

Yes to everything. Yes, made me feel better than ever. Yes, she knows more about me than my best friend of 20 years. How she got it out of me, I still don't know. Yes, I gave everything to make it work, to go back to that first year. I gave until there was nothing left of old me, and still, it was not enough.

I wish this was a bad dream, that am going to wake up next to her tommorow and she will smile and we're going to have an awesome day together... My life was a horror movie, and the shit I'm in now is the aftermath. Fuck.

smoked some weed with my BPD ex

and that was really something
i thought i was talking to someone else
to a much younger, more insecure her
her REAL her, she was all loving, caring and sweet
i told her, since i too was pretty high, that i was talking to someone else not her self she shows me during the day
i noticed that if i said something she needed to justify herself she changed her voice, her pitch, she sounded much more angrier

>>42724467
me too man, it's pretty spooky too if you think of it now that her actions and words all have an actual reasoning behind them

goosebumps here too my man

>>42724435
no need man, i just don't want anyone to go through the hell that we had to go through, so more people educated on it the better.

>>42724344
No, it's very unlikely. My ex would refuse to read it and have a new reason every time, even though she was professionally diagnosed with it.
The thing is, their reality is all they have ever known, and they are so fucked in the head that most of their "i want help, i wanna kill myself im so depressed" shit is just cries for attention. If a borderline wants help, they have to do it alone. None of us can fix them.

The saddest part is, modern medicine literally has no idea what to do with them. Medication doesn't work and it takes YEARS of extensive Dialectical Behavioral Therapy to only lessen symptoms. It's very sad.

>>42724385
>>42724400
it's not your fault, we chose to look past their craziness because we "loved" them and wanted them to get better. nothing we could have or can do.

>>42724421
Use a tactic called "Grey Rocking", it basically means to act as uninteresting as possible so they will become bored with you and move on. Look it up for a second, it'll help.

>>42724495
can not thank you enough for this anon

>>42724467
It's not your fault.
Learn about codependancy, go to therapy if you really need to, because a relationship with them can fuck guys up REALLY badly.

The brain has a weird way of erasing all of the bad memories and only remembering the good. Consider writing all of the bad experiences you had down, and when you miss her, remind yourself of who she really was.

So, next time you remember having a great day with her, also remember how she made the night a total shit show with screaming matches and crying and threats of suicide because you turned off a light switch that she was using, or accidentally bumped her.

It does get better, anon.

>>42724491
There is no reasoning behind them. Her actions are a result of her emotions. Her emotions are seen as fact to her, that's the world she lives in. Not in reality.

>>42724542
>Her actions are a result of her emotions. Her emotions are seen as fact to her, that's the world she lives in. Not in reality.
damn combined with the whole woman give more about emotions this is a shit show bound to go down every single time

>people either don't have girlfriends or end up with bpd girls
the fuck is wrong with this board

>>42724542

>accidentally bumped her

This One Is Too Close to home. Lol

>>42724481
Regardless of how proficient or successful she is in her professional sphere, issues of an emotional nature make you feel like you're dealing with a little girl, who's living inside a woman's body

was this the little girl i was speaking to here?

>>42724542

Thank you for this info. You seem to have 2-3 of us in this thread owing you a debt we can never repay.

Tommorow is a new day. I'm saving this thread, rereading everything tommorow and studying more about it. I will not have the rest of my life ruined.

>>42724558
Suprise suprise, lonely 4chan autists end up with crazy manipulative chicks in search of mutual validation.

Even crazies get lonely anon. We're all still human after all.

>>42724598
do it anon, i'm still reading on about it

Ninth, the minute you make contact with her, you're giving away your power! No matter what you think you need to say to this female, these dialogues will leave you feeling worse, not better. You may compulsively replay these conversations in your head afterwards, and think you did a really good job--but it won't be long before you're doubting it, and torturing yourself.

god
damn
the second i got off the phone with her, this occurred the next day

>>42724557
yup, also they only experience extremes so it's either EXTREMELY HAPPY or KILL MYSELF SAD.

>>42724558
i mean, the people who have had bpd girlfriends are going to be the ones posting in a thread where pretty much everyone is talking about bpd, so you're bound to get more posts about it than regular gfs.

>>42724576
Ignore their professional spheres, they are very good at appearing normal to the public while being batshit in personal relationships. that's why it's so easy for them to, when moving on to their new target, paint you as abusive and evil and that he is "saving" her from you.

and that's what they are. little girls in woman's bodies. that's why it's so fucking scary. you wouldn't get mad at a toddler for exhibiting these behaviors, would you?

>>42724619
>little girls in woman's bodies.
then i was literally talking to this little girl inside of her while she was high

this is scary dude, like, her pronounciation, the way she was looking at me, the way she was toying with my words

holy fucking shit balls i need another beer

>>42724598
Best way to repay it is to make sure nobody falls into the trap. If you know someone who is with someone like that, warn them. Educate them. If you see someone talking about their relationship like that, make a comment. that's all i did and it turned into this. take back control of your life, find a healthy woman, remember that whenever you see her "happy" with her new guy, underneath it is all of the sadness and pain and an unfillable void of a human that will self-sabotage every time. Rise above.

>>42724697
+1 internet to you kind sir

i bookmarked that website and should i ever see anyone in this sort of predicament i will warn them

>>42724636
it's not really the little girl inside of her though, she IS the little girl. she never matured like us.

you know how when you see a toddler and show them something or say something, they will repeat it back to you or mimic the action?

i bet it felt a lot like that.

deadlifts

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Psychfag here. Shout out to the anon educating everybody on BPD.

>>42724715
>i bet it felt a lot like that.
this is too scary man
she did repeat everything i say in a sort of toddler-ish voice

fuuuuuuuck
this is sad, creepy, mind blowing and everything in between

>>42724726
big shout out

>>42724726
did you fuck girls or what does this mean

>>42724697
Seriously thank you anon. I hope you go to sleep realizing you really helped some people today.

>>42724726
thanks man, you probably know a lot more about it than I do. i just spent tons of hours researching it to the point where i'm pretty well informed, how'd I do?

>>42724731
best to not associate with her at all.

>>42724787
I, too, wonder what he meant by this

>>42724822
>best to not associate with her at all.
sure is

i believe i've read enough about it for now as my beer is empty
but damn what a ride that was
helped me get over the gloomy last days and i feel infinitely better now

she told me she'd contact me as i have some books of her and she still has my phone charging cable
i'm going to stay the hell away from her during and after the exchange

cheers man!

>>42724697

Will do.

I wasn't going to mention this, because we already have a lot of "OMG, JUST LIKE ME" stuff in this thread, but a very good friend was with a girl that obviously had this, turned up to 11. He shared a lot with me, she abused the shit out of him all the while having him fall madly for her and believing she is mad about him. All the shit he told me, I was just going mad. At one point I said to him to just get out, that she is not sane, that I do not want to meet her because I was legit scared of her.

She cheated with 2 different people (that we know of) and it only ended when she left him for a new victim which she started mirroring immediately, and that was not one of the other two guys.

He couldn't dump her no matter what I said. Like she had a grip on him. I lost a lot of respect for him back then because I was on the outside, looking in, not understanding. How ironic that all that time I was raped harder and longer than he ever was.

>>42724787
>>42724841
Psychology is a field heavily saturated by women. For many women, it is a "mommy and daddy made me go to college so I will major in Psychology"-field.

>>42724822
I haven't had any course on psychopathology since undergrad and my graduate program doesn't cover them, unfortunately. However, while I haven't read all of your posts, you nailed down the main tenement in that their overall behavior is controlled by emotions with little--if any--logic involved. A woman having BPD adds an entirely new variable to any interaction you could have with her.

>>42724882

How much of their behavior is them/their true self wanting to hurt you and how much is it the mental illness? Should we have empathy for them and assume it's not under their control, like someone with alzheimer's

>>42724846
glad you got out of that man, stay strong.

>>42724872
we do have a lot of that because all of the relationships are always so similar, it's not just a circlejerk.

and yeah, she did have a grip on him. he probably felt like he was the crazy one, i remember at times actually wondering if i had the disorder and not her. he's lucky he had friends that told him to get the fuck out, mine literally enabled her and suggested things I could do to help her lmao.

we'll all survive though.

>>42724882
it really is something, isn't it? hopefully medicine makes advancements on personality disorders, but they're so damn hard to treat. And they need more exposure too.

>>42724915
Personally, and this is just my belief, there are BPDs that are people with an illness and there are BPDs who are bad people. We should have empathy, despite them having none for us, but we can have empathy from a distance and leave them to their self destructive behaviors.

What happens if you ghost a BPD girl after a break up?
Is there any sort of counter logistic ?

Also hypothetically speaking what happens if two BPD people get in a relationship?

>>42724932
having empathy for someone with BPD is only hurtful, not once have i felt empathy from my Ex, not once have i felt that she was thinking how i could feel about certain things

>>42724915
Like most everything, it is subjective. Anecdotally, I have known BPD girls who are harmful and hazardous, flittering from one attentional-resource to the next, while I also have a BPD friend who said she just cries a lot and is one of the sweetest girls I've met. Knowing is the first step toward changing and improvement, and to correct a problem, you first have to acknowledge it exists.
Another thing a lot of people are not aware of is that maturity does not occur until around the age of 25 on average--when the frontal lobe develops which controls higher-order executive processes--and anyone under that age frame likely does not know shit about anything.

>>42724932
Coincidentally, I forgot that the current girl I'm hung up on (not even from a relationship, sadly) likely has BPD and of course, that explains much of her behavior.

>>42725006
>Another thing a lot of people are not aware of is that maturity does not occur until around the age of 25 on average--when the frontal lobe develops which controls higher-order executive processes--and anyone under that age frame likely does not know shit about anything.
is this why with 26 i feel much... wiser, experience as i did with say 23?

>>42725006
How much people in the world have some sort of mild BPD?

>>42724962
I disagree anon. I think the other view is right. There are people with BPD who are just mentally ill. And then there are legitimately bad people with BPD. I'm pretty sure my ex and her mom both had BPD. But I never once felt my ex was a bad person. None of her BPD behaviors felt malicious. She just changed on me and couldn't help it despite caring. She even said she didn't know what was wrong with her, she just felt the way she did for some reason and was sorry. Now her mom on the other hand was different. I never saw that bitch display a single bit of remorse for her BPD behaviors at all, she even seemed to relish in the shit she did.

Doesn't make them any less crazy bitches. But one is just a shitty person all around while the other seemingly cant help it.

>>42725052
sorry for my wording as i didn't want to say you shouldn't empathize with BPD people,

what i wanted to say was, that i encountered no empathy towards me from my ex while i was the one being able to easily think what she might think on certain topics or how she could react
while she never gave me the feeling that she thought about what i could think for once

>>42722973
kek

>>42725021
Yes. You gain logical thinking skills, among other things. On a side note, the amount of literal children who have swarmed 4chan since its become grossly mainstream is the leading cause to its sheer drop in quality, in my opinion.

>>42725034
That's assumptuous. First of all, how would you even define 'mild' BPD? Don't fall for that line of thinking.

>>42722684
I'd never heard of that website before, shit's funny. Are there any more pictures like that?

>>42725088
>'mild' BPD?
well everything minus the whole self harming and being aggressive all the time part

Reading all about this made me think my Ex-Gf has BPD

I might just give her a hug without any words when we meet up again

Then again reading this thread everything makes so much more sense

Should've listened to my best friend telling me this girl was toxic

>>42724942
They will most likely try to contact you back and sink their hooks in, to get their narcissistic supply. Yikes, I don't know what would happen but I don't wanna fuckin' be around for it when it does. They would probably push eachother to the extreme, falling so insanely hard for eachother that they would be married in weeks. Then the fallout would be catastrophic.

>>42724962
Empathy, not sympathy. Borderlines have extremely low empathy. I don't have any sympathy for my ex though.

>>42725034
the statistic I read was about 8%-11% of American women have BPD

>>42725052
The thing is, we will never really know will we? We will never know if it was just manipulation when they were saying how sorry they were and it was impulsive etc, or if they genuinely are sorry. After I confronted my ex about cheating with multiple people at once, I asked her why she did it. All she said was "i'm a bad person". Is that emotional manipulation, or do they genuinely have moments of clarity? I guess we will never know. One of my greatest flaws though, as you can see here, is trying to understand their thought processes when they themselves do not understand it. You cannot understand insanity.

>>42725111
>falling so insanely hard for eachother that they would be married in weeks. Then the fallout would be catastrophic.
Would at the very least be an entertaining movie to watch

>>42725111
>the statistic I read was about 8%-11% of American women have BPD
and i managed to snag one up off of 4chan

the luck i have

>>42725111
>You cannot understand insanity.
makes you somehow appreciate your own craziness somehow doesn't it

>>42725126
You know the signs now, though. Don't make the mistake again.

>>42725143
I mean, I'd take my craziness over being a slave to my emotions any day. Wouldn't you?

>>42725172
sure would, rational thinking > emotional thinking and acting

as long as everything makes actual sense its alright

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Not to be the 100th person to jump in but I also had a BPD ex. The gaslighting, the arguments, the feeling of walking on eggshells, the highs and lows, the constant makeup/breakup sex.

It ended with her cheating on me, transmitting chlamydia to me, and trying to get me kicked out of school for "harassment"

Let me tell you guys that things slowly will get better but you have to cut her off completely. Things ended with her 7-8 months ago and for ages I would stalk her shit on social media. Don't to that shit. Focus on you

>>42725197
funny how a lot of us have experienced more or less the same thing here

makes me feel not so alone with this situation

>>42722511
Well said anon!

anyways anons it's been great talking to you and i'm glad i could have shed some insight on this nasty disorder.

best thing to do if you're still feeling like shit is to get support for it.
https://www.reddit.com/r/BPDlovedones/comments/3xot4w/expecting_the_unexpected_a_bpd_breakup_guide/

i know it's reddit and all but i would recommend reading that, reading the shit in the side bar, and if you want talk to the ppl there who all have similar experiences. good luck anons.

>>42725208
read some of the stories over there and you will be even more surprised.

>>42725221
thank you once again and have a great evening/day/morning anon!

>this thread
>fit is so debilitatingly autistic that they slander the names of their previous girlfriends by claiming they all had bipolar disorder
>fit pretends to be psychologists online when in reality everyone here is an engineer making 150k a year

Literally the most pathetic board on 4chan

>>42725286
not ALL but the recent, but my 2 recents ones while not having full blown BPD they had a lot of those points checked

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>BPD
>bipolar disorder
wew lad

>>42725307
Sounds to me like the guys in this thread just want to put some blame on their girlfriend for breaking up by claiming they all have bipolar disorder

although it would actually make sense that guys on 4chan can only get girlfriends who have legit psychological disorders

not sure which to believe

>>42725334
speaking for myself my ex checked many boxes on the BPD chart
im not blaming her im not saying "oh that bitch blabla im so mad"
im seeing that she has legit problems she cant do something about it

>>42725352
>responding to it

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>have qt gf in HS
>shes one year older, goes out of state to college
>try to keep the relationship together
>she gets more distant, goes full party mode
>get massive anxiety
>try to talk to her about her skipping her classes
>she tells me fuck off every time
> we break up
> she turns into full tinder slut, tells me shes FWB with 4 guys
>have anxiety attack, vomit on the floor
>go into counseling, start lifting and cardio
>block myself from seeing her at all, no exeptions
>figure out what was going on in my head and realize that there was a fuckton of redflags i missed (daddy issues, pretty manipulative of my feels)
>feel good for the first time in months

>fast forward, im in college now
>wonder what happened to her anyways
>check her twitter
>her header pic is her in a puddle of vomit in a tent
>all her posts are bragging about her dicks she fucked and drunk tweets about parties, also picked up smoking
>shes actually taking pride in getting shitfaced 3-4 days a week
>shes basically a danny brown song now
>start hyperventilating and close that shit

how am i still scared of her /fit/? sorry for the blog post. i havent had a girl since and i dont want the same thing to happen

>>42725381

go back into counseling

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the reason i intentionally got into lifting was because i found it so therapeutic after breaking up with my BPD ex.

>>42725286
i have had normal ex gfs where shit ended and it sucked but a BPD breakup is like a fucking nuclear bomb going off

>>42725420

borderline breakup should be easier than a healthy girl cause you can just tell yourself the borderline girl has a severe mental illness like schizophrenia, alzheimer's, etc. healthy person it might be tougher cause you'll think "what if" or you could have done better or something

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>>42725334
Naw man, It's pretty defined once you realize it. I had a gf in high school who broke up with me. It was due to no personality faults of our own, but the fact that we both couldn't deal with a long distance relationship. There was never any bad blood and I'm still friendly with this girl today.

The BPD ex is different. It's like the person you fell in love with changed literally overnight. At least thats what happened to me. I mean I don't even know how to explain it except that one night we were talking about the hot steamy sex we were going to have, and then the next I can't get her to say 15 words to me in a conversation. Over the course of a month I saw a girl who I loved literally become a different person to me. At the end, the girl who used to love me said I wasn't even worth her time. And I mean the month were she changed literally went through ALL the markers just discussed here. I've been with a few women and never had this happen with them.

I mean I don't know how else to put it. But if you date multiple women and see this, it's pretty demarked in it's difference.

>>42725447
this

when you're being treated like heaven on earth and weeks later you're being diminished emotionally and told that literally everything you do, speak and how you are annoys her and some weeks later she says you fuck her so good you start to wonder that this isn't any kinds of healthy

>>42725221
Thank you for the reddit thread. It really does help.

>>42725447

>and then the next I can't get her to say 15 words to me in a conversation.

i can relate to this

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>mfw i will never find love because it doesn't exist

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>>42725627
>>42725490
It's ok anons. We know now. We can only move on and continue ti better ourselves through constant lifting and learning.

>>42723523
There is nothing normal about literally crying and obsessing over a female not wanting to be with you or never having been in a relationship at all. If anything it's one of the most immature, loser filled boards here.

Anonymous ## Mod 2017-09-03 12:03:06 Post No.42725955
[Report]

Anonymous ## Mod 2017-09-03 12:03:06 Post No.42725955 [Report]

Relationship, dating advice, and "mental health" threads belong on /adv/. Constructive only though. If you just want to vent use /r9k/.