LEGENDARY THREADS OF /FIT/ THREAD il start it off with

Roach man from last week or 2 weeks ago

over 100 pounds of ass and an eletric cane

Squatting body weight means putting your weight in the bar as a begginer

creepy turbo autist that would go to the gym, take pics of qt and write a fanfic about it where he saves her from rape and they fall in love, got kicked out and mad thinking he did nothing wrong

Guy that did GOMAD right for a week and was shitting water

Guy that ate 36 egg whites a day

You don't have to answer but you have to eat all these eggs

Don't have the images, hopefully fags will post it. God i need to get away from this place

>>42296051
>>42296110

i remember the guy that ate like 50 or somethings eggs and started to pass out

also ice cream thread

>>42296128
there's also the guy that ate 5g of caffeine and almost had a liver failure, almost died

and the guy that overdosed on a bunch of vitamins and had literal liver failure at 27

>>42296197
>and the guy that overdosed on a bunch of vitamins and had literal liver failure at 27

there's no way this really happened
did it

>>42296051
You mean typical autistic fit right? Fuck you.

Wasn't there a fucking thread where some dumbass started texting in the gym lockerroom because he was a virgin and the girl he was flirting with the entire time finally just outright invited him to her place and was asking for advice

>>42296203
Retard took a vitamin stack that some trips posted, but thought it was lacking some Vitamin K.
Retard didn't know how to measure, so ended up with a dose large enough to cause renal failure/hepiatic damage.

>>42296238
>>42296240
>but he did post proof

nah, it's a made up story. i'd like to see the "proof" as i'm sure it could be effortlessly fabricated

sorry but this didn't happen, same as the squat body weight guy. shit that reads like a story is a story.

>>42296261
>didn't happen

the fuck you talking about vitamin avenger literally went to jail because twig ass moot sent his info to the cops for killing the kid

>>42296203

got confused with the kidney failure guy, it was this >>42296240


>>42296261
a guy was raising cockroaches to eat and you think some faggot poisoning himself is impossible?

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>>42296110

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Anyone have the Oh Steve thread?

>>42296282
yeah that extra didn't happen
>>42296285
something that reads like a story is a story. i'm almost 40 and i'm not wrong. you'll understand when you're older

>>42296051

holy shit that's hysterical

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Found the 100 pounds of ass thread in fit humor

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Had forgotten about this classic, i still do not understand

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Most underrated thread:

https://desuarchive.org/fit/thread/39368935/#39371803

>>42296297
pictures like that are the gold that MS Paint produces, it'd be a shame to lose it

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Love this one

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>>42296128
I LOVE THE GASTON EGGS THREAD HERE YOU GO

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>>42296317
I was wondering about the Oh Steve thread too

Also does anyone have the John thread about the OP named John who popped a boner at a pool party and some roastie shamed him on instagram?
The we weaponized our autism and found her insta?

>>42296333
>almost 40

Yeah someone has dementia, stay on your meds grandpa

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I'm still waiting for a decent crop of roach farmer

>>42296384
3pl8 baby!

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>>42296419
A modern classic

Just like this one

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>>42296436
this still hurts

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Another recent one

>>42296401
Burn the coal pay the toll!

Cmon, john

>>42296370
Lmfao

>>42296458
>i love you for you who are
ruined this screencap for me desu
when I was in the thread itself I read "for who you are" but the dumb ESL typo kills it in retrospect

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does this count? only screencap i got

>>42296532
No it does not count. The fact that you saved this is telling.

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>>42296110

>>42296578
it was interesting i guess

>>42296547
it's jut a guy who raises cockroaches

if you know anything at all about keeping invertebrates this is not in any way weird even. tons of people do this shit. the big exotic ones are slow moving and cool.

>>42296532
>>42296599
>The very first suggestion is to wear cologne

Anon, please just delete this image

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>>42296604
>nothing wrong with getting feelings for roaches, refering to them in creepy affectionate ways and treating them as you would a pupper

roach farmer pls go and stay go

>>42296635
>he doesn't value all animal life
you don't even understand that pupper that you pet

btw i have a tank full of shrimps right now. shrimps nigga. inverts. GOOD TO EAT

>>42296619
>>42296532
>no scarves
do they not have winter where this fag's from? kek

Anyone have the one where an anon busted through his ceiling put in a power rack but then ended up putting it too close to the wall for the bar to fit?

>>42296663
i think the humor thread in the archive has it

>>42296663
he posted months later and is still using it like that, btw

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>>42296663
Here ya go

>>42296702
yay thx desu

>>42296240
>>42296203
So I have a question. What vitamins could you possibly kill your self on? Just fat soluble ones like A and K?

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Oh, Steve...

>>42296763
>getting friendly with girls

this is the mistake the every fucking guy makes

see a girl you want to fuck? try to fuck her. that's the first thing you do. there is no in between you go directly after her

Requesting not a thread but a screencapped post that had a bunch of exercises like Squats,
Deadlifts, etc and changed them to hick sounding exercises. Can't remember any of them exactly but it was like
>Calling (enter hick sounding exercise), "squat"

>>42296231
Wasn't that just a few months ago?

anyone remember the "tankman" who came here a few years ago trying to sell his retarded workout suit invention?

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Not a "classic" I just found it funny

>>42296458

>tfw you're in the screencap.
>tfw so is everyone else.

equality is a false god.

>>42296727
The ones he oded on was vitamin K I believe

>>42296882
reaction image culture was a mistake

>>42296920
yeah, it was K

>>42296727
You can OD on every vitamin and mineral anon, just need to ingest enough

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>>42296876

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>>42296876
>>42297041
Holy shit that feel. I'm hurting for that guy

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>>42296876
At ages 10-12 or so when I would attend class birthday parties, we had a game where one person would hide in a closet and then the girls would point at different people until that person said stop. Every time it ended on me there was a re-do.

>tfw still a kissless at 26 of age

>>42297035
I know. But aren't fat soluble ones particularly easy as they can't be peed out?

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>>42297165
I know it hurts bro. But you'll make it. We're all gonna make it

>>42296727
A,D,E,K

>>42296876
physical...pain

>>42297204
I wish him the best of luck.

The thread where the fat guy posted his amazing rack a few months back was pretty funny.

CMON POST MOAR

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>>42297411
YAS MOAR

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>>42297411
CMON

>>42296458
This wasn't even that fucking bad. Those are huge tropical roaches anyway. If they were American, or German roaches; then I'd be disgusted.

>>42297634 meant for >>42296547 whoops

>>42297536
this cant be real

my sides

>>42297705
This is why I think /fit/ is sincerely the most autistic board on this site. Others hide there autism alone in vidya or anime. But /fit/izens are even more pathetic because they might look like Chad on the outside but on the inside they are just as pathetic as the other anons

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>>42296738
better quality

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>>42297204

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I found this on here - anyone have the pictures of this botched sex change?

>>42298053
I had that one open in an archived thread.
http://i.4cdn.org/fit/1501034566855.png

>>42298053
sometimes I feel weird, but now I think I'm perfectly normal. these people are really messed up

>>42298053
Of course that happened they went to a doctor in fucking Thailand

home gym weaponry

>>42298053
Makes me sad that there are people who will take advantage of these mental folks and push this kind of shit on them

fucking makes me mad

>>42298053
damn I'm glad to have a dick

>>42296261
>it could be effortlessly fabricated
Yeah but TYVD stopped posting afterwards

>>42298147
It's like that for literally EVERY sex change. ALL post-op trannies have to dilate their "vagina" for 90 minutes a day because it's literally a fucking wound that's trying to heal and will seal itself closed if they don't stick something in there. It's also extremely painful and bloody, and the mentally ill call it their "period".

Anyone have the one where the guy stuffs a live turd into his gym bag and bolts out of there while his gym bro dies of laughter?

>>42296197
Oh yeah that fucking idiot who took waaaay too much vitamin k.

>>42297165
Dont feel bad, that happened to me but i ended up having great relationships later on in life. Pfhh jyst brush it off

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>>42298248

>>42298053
this makes it all the more disturbing that they're trying to push being trans like something completely normal. I wonder how many people are going through the same shit because the current fixation on LGBT people. I mean, some are indeed happier afterwards and hey, good for them, but people are presenting sex changes waaaay to lightly

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>>42298053
How did I miss that? Saved to my /pol/-humor folder.

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>>42297536
>>42298363

I now have no sides.

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>>42298363

>>42298517
jesus christ


im sorry sides

>>42296876

Only time ive kissed a girl was playing spin the bottle when I was 12. Oddly enough we we're the only ones who kissed when playing it.

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>>42297840

NO! IT CANNOT BE!

>>42298550
How old are you now?

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>>42298053
Here ya go

>>42298588
this is sociophathic but i would totally do the same

>>42298577

25

>>42298588
kinda unbelievable. if she's a cheating whore she'd probably still care about other guys their opinions and wouldn't pack up all that weight just to get your dick hard

>>42298634
Ouch buddy

>>42298654
he can still become a wizard, I'm his age and the last time I had sex was so long ago I can't even remember what sex feels like.
it's like god let me have a taste of being normal for one year and then took it all away again.

>>42296334
Glad I'm not American and therefore can't actually ruin sexual innuendos by mentioning fit Memes since potential partners wouldn't understand it anyway and just assume (rightly) that I am autistic.

>>42298681
i regret even opening that

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>>42298587
WHAT THE FUG

>>42298681
So... anyone want to fuck?

>>42298867
Where you at?

>>42298814
This makes my sides go into orbit but i would prob react the same way

how to make son not turn gay?

>>42298869
AK

>>42298867
I'd be down but I am in Germany

>>42298872
Avoid tap water. Buy only bio food. I heard there was a link between autism and homosexuality but not sure. Go on /pol/ they have some good shit about that.

This is the best board on 4chan

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>>42298902

>>42298898
This one only works if you've seen the flex a 'cep post

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>>42298918

>>42298933
Agreed

>>42298918
God damn I jej at this one

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>>42298517
I'm fucking dying

>>42298147
nigga dont you realize thailand is probably the country with the most Mtf transition surgeries? ladyboys nigga

>>42297204
Kek this one's pretty good. Whirlwinding like in Diablo 2 or some shit.

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>>42298942

>>42296384
>9g cholesterol, 3000% of recommended daily intake
Lmao

>>42298587
this made me sad.

>>42296431
I have never seen the roach one, can somebody post it?

>>42299041
Check the thread dummy

>>42297840

I don't know. I'm decently balanced, and just come here for the shitposting and to talk to people that aren't complete normalfags.

>>42298441
You can't change your gender the same as you can't change your sex.

>>42298053

This is supposed to be a fun thread, faggot. Now I feel sick.

I was having a really shitty day and actually thinking about ending it.

Thanks for this thread, guys.

>>42298918
>i do this too

am i too far gone?

>>42297536
this can't be real, no way someone would be trapped like that and not get out in 7 hours. Absolutely no way

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>>42299081
I'm dead

>>42297840
>>42297705

I guess its real

I have noticed that fitness culture attracts all the beta autistic teenagers who actually hope lifting heavy things will turn them into normal human beings.

But this never works.

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>>42298577
>My gf and me dressed my penis as a pirate and hung it.
>gf
>this mutilated no-dick-man has a gf and you're alone

>>42298053
Serves him right for listening to the lgbt bullshit propaganda

>>42299237
getting a gf isn't hard, anyone on /fit/ could do it. However a gf that doesn't completely repulse you is a different story

>>42298587
OP of original image - why did I ask for this? It is so much worse than I imagined.

>>42296419
never seen this one, loled hard

>>42296361
I'm crying and chuckling in an autistic fashion. Help me... my entire family is about to uncover my power level the further down I go.

>>42299274
It was from like 2 days ago

>>42297204
I hope both of these guys make it

>>42296428
HAHAHAHA

I did this too for a time

>>42299175

Keep it together, brother, and don't look at the trap pics.

>>42298607
Of course you would. That's who you are right?

Need that epic shit story thread

>>42299193
its fine if you are in middle school and do this. Its even okay for freshman and maybe sophomore students. But if you are nearing 18 and do this then you may want to just experience the embarrassment to get better socially.

>>42298867
>So... anyone want to fuck?
Yes.as long as i can cum in you.

>>42299355
mine is still only mild, or at least that's what the psychologist says

first and only gf of two years cheated on me repeatedly, while saying she was not ready for her first time and fucking guys on the side. I discovered and beat the fuck up of the guy she was fucking at the end, but i'm still pretty fucked psychologically speakingm trust issues ,anger management and all of that

>>42298814
LOL,oh my sides.

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>>42296051
>>42296436
>>42296448
Tfw my someone saves my OC, FeelsGoodNigga. Here is another one I made in that thread, but I forgot to link it.

>>42298587
This needs more exposure desu

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Now THIS is a classic
/fit/ detects manlet using advanced trigonometry

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>>42298517

>>42299423
hmm, try Xanax

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>>42296051
>this was 3 years ago
Where does the time go?

>>42296051
>zyzz golem

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>>42298814

GOLDEN

>>42296370

I was here for that and I don't think anything on 4chan has made me laugh that hard

>>42299459
I remember someone posting a picture with an ipad but he was such a manlet some anon replied with "nice ipod bro". Was it in this board?

>>42296876
>Not high fiving thier face
Never gonna make it

>>42298053
This is a blue board m8

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>>42297536

whether its real or not best laugh ive ever had over a screencap

>>42299553
Go back to /mu/, Brandon

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>>42298587

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>>42297178

>>42296590
This is destined to be /fit/'s defining moment.

>>42299459

Who's got the one of the guy who exposed a manlet by stacking the guy's dog 4 times and revealing him to be 4'11" or something

>>42298918
I always forget about the fucking rat which just takes this to the next level

>>42299193
>am i too far gone?
Stories?

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>>42297202
kek, i remember when that was posted

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>>42299800
just the programming part, it's pretty much the same, i run situations 100 times on my head and analize the outcomes before taking actions as simple as asking for food

the rat in the oven is too muchm tho i did almost burn the house while trying to kill a big spider using a spray deodorant as a flame thrower

>>42298681
How does it end tho

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>>42299862
>analize

>>42298588

OUT FUCKING SKILLED

>>42297536
Laughing so hard couldnt even read through the tears

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>>42299773
I gotchu famalam

Post the one with the guy who builds the Conan Wheel of pain in his front yard for exercise.

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>>42300072
>this

I REMEMBER

>>42296876
holy shit, if i was that guy i wouldve cried

>>42298587
Are those TEETH in one of those pics?

>>42297315
A if in Retinol form, ie, as found in meat and supplements. If in beta-carotene form, like plants, the worst you'll do is turn a little orange.

>>42300240
That's what I thought anon, looks like Donald Trumps mouth

>>42297536
this has been my all time favorite screencap for years. everytime i read it i burst into treats.

>he gives me a strange look and says mate come here for a second
had to stop reading there i was laughing too hard and my eyes were blurry from the tears

holy fuck

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>>42299862
>i run situations 100 times on my head and analize the outcomes
What do you think would happen if you didn't prepare for simple conversations?

>>42299862
Do not worry autist Anon, I do this too if I have the time and I'm not forced to improvise. Every phone conversation gets mentally scripted as a collection of if/then clauses.

>>42299862
you should l2 heuristics m8

>>42298890
Brutal

>>42297536
I've read this before. It's hilarious.

>>42296532
i spent 5 minutes reading this and youre a faggot for it

>>42299459
masterpiece

>>42299459
Wonder if he keeps a stool by the door to look out the peep hole.

>>42296532
this is the most embarrassing post

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>>42296532
i cant get over this. i cannot beliebe that TWO of the rules here are to WASH YOURSELF

>>42296649
Where I'm from only fags wear scarves because it's too hot

/florida/

>>42299237
i dont want a gf that wants me to kill my pen0r in a bad way

>>42297202
That would actually work if you caught them in between a set. and if you're attractive

>>42296428
Lost it

I was legitimately considering doing this but Tyler Durden style

>>42298681
Of course its in fucking Melbourne. Gayest city on Earth

>>42296458
nvr ferget

>>42296532
I disagree with morning showering and not spending more money on shoes and clothes. Night showering keeps your bed clean from sweat and dirt. If you get bedhead from night showering, just wet your hair to shape it and if that isnt enough use products, blowdry, or just use conditioner in the morning without any at night. Spending 110 or less on shoes and being cheap on clothes will make you look basic and middle class.

>>42299608
It's boring there.

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>>42301205
Improve yourself. Don't try to be something you aren't. Any chick or bro worth knowing will see through your act.

>>42296346
I literally cried laughing wiping tears away for two minutes

thanks /fit/

>>42296532
>wear an undershirt with a polo shirt
Don't do this.

>>42301205
kek im actually about to watch Drive because of that post. I had seen the post before but didnt remember what movie it was

>>42297536
it's sadder that people pretend this is funny than that someone pretended it actually happened

>PT comes in and starts reviewing security camera footage randomly
yes because that would ever happen. because this whole story doesn't sound just completely made up.

people laughing at this shit are literal sub 18s who need banned

>>42298517
lmfao

>>42296458
kys

>>42301421
fuck off cunt. The fact that they're probably made up is part of the appeal, you wanna believe; these are hilarious regardless

Also dont underestimate the autism of /fit/izens. they wouldnt be here if they werent so fucking retarded.

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>>42298587
sure do wish I hadn't read this

>>42299175
Keep your chin up man, don't give up.

>>42298890
>he had a 5 star Italian restaurant detonating out of the slacks pressed for him by his mom
Wtf does this mean? This sentence makes zero sense

>>42301964
he was spilling his spaghetti

>>42296882
>tfw when my post didn't make the cap

>>42301999
Oh, moms spaghetti and all that, yeah.

>>42302065
>>42301964
>moms spaghetti
>thinking this is where the meme originates from
>being this new

>>42301421
The guy probably opened up the gym. So it was very strange that someone was already inside before him, and even weirder that he was trapped under a bb. So he checked the security footage. It's quite normal tbqh

>>42299081
holy shit that sure is funny

>>42302088
Are you brain damaged or something? I've been here since 2007, and know perfectly well where moms spaghetti originates from. I just didn't notice the guy was referencing it in "he had a 5 star Italian restaurant detonating out of the slacks pressed for him by his mom".
I just woke up, give me a break you fucking faggot.

>>42302169
Pshh, newfag I've been here since '84

>>42296334

This is GOLD

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>>42298860
Holy fuck my sides

>>42298587
LOL fkn great read that's what he gets

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>>42298053
>>42298587
Feel bad for him. His entire life ruined because of one stupid emotional mistake.

>>42302387
>feeling bad for a lunatic
It was his own choice, got what he deserved. You have to be a fucking moron to mutilate your own body, no shit you're gonna regret it.

>>42302406
ever thought that lunatics didnt choose to be lunatics? so i agree with >>42302387 i feel bad for him aswell.

>>42302406
I think he was a moron too, but you can't deny that communities like that manipulate people into acting on these fucked up ideas and it is sad to see the aftermath.

>>42296458
So /fit/s perfect girlfriend is a retard?

>>42302488
exactly. they GET manipulated, so if someone manipulates you and you do fucked up shit which harms yourself, would u be cool with ppl saying "it was ur choice, u got what u deserved"? i dont think so.

>>42298053

I don't know why but my penis started hurting while reading this

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>>42296051
The screencap is a bit bad, but here is the perfect physigue thread

>>42297909
thx

>>42297204
He better scream "creatine made me do this"

>>42298607
It's more psychopathic, actually. Sociopaths don't really tend to plan shit.

>>42302657
Do you understand the difference between a sociopath and a psycopath, idt you do.

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not /fit/ but the best thread I've ever seen was on the misc

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>>42302639

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>>42302639
>not including the bogpilled

>>42301421
I work at my gym and we check the cameras for random stuff pretty regularly. I might not have done it right in front of the guy, but you better believe that I would have fired up that footage later to see what happened.

>>42298887
ay where m8

>>42302903
Could I have a fast recap on this perfect bogdy?

>>42302926
i don't know it lad its a old legend even arnie had to spend his life learning their secrets of pumping iron
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tz2DknROaI8

Anyone have the cap from that thread of the fat guy with nice tits?

>>42296364

truly underrated

thank you anon

>>42303003
face looks surprisingly good for 48

>>42296428
I did this with nightcrawler instead of drive.
I ended up getting caught stealing scrap metal and decided to cut my losses at that point.

>>42298363
fuck I'm crying

>>42302999
this thread is the most baffling rage inducing thing in existence

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>>42303003

>>42296051
The green text about pussy pad being yelled and someone throwing a twizzler bar please post

>>42302088
>5 star Italian restaurant detonating out of the slacks pressed for him by his mom
translates into
>mom's spaghetti

Fucking how?

Detonation is the act of violently rapid pressure expansion AKA an explosion, slacks are a term for pants and pressing is another word for ironing.
So in layman's terms what you said was, he had a 5 star italian restaurant exploding out of the pants that his mom ironed.
I mean, I love complicating simple sentences to sound original, but let's face it, if you want to do that, you need to be genuinely intelligent.

>>42298817
Well at least you know you're autistic, but the problem here isn't that she understood
>lickeroo
It's the fact that she had never heard the term in her life and upon hearing it, it shook her to her core. So much so that it sobered her up and killed her libido.
Stuck up bitch though, even if she didn't know what it was, "lickeroo" should be grounds for at least a confused laugh.

>>42296231
He got laid I'm pretty sure.

>>42302387
>One mistake

Yeah, it was only one.

>>42302903
Perfection. If only there were two of these.

>>42303404
I think the point was that spilling spaghetti would've been an underestimation, a whole fucking restaurant exploded from his pocket

someone please post the one where the guy had kingdom hearts size shoes and someone shopped a keyblade unto him.

>>42299862
Can you talk to qts? What happens it one mires you?

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>>42303555

>>42301421
It's not that hard to put 2X2 together and get curious

>>42303003
God that man is an excellent storyteller

>>42302999
good lord, i was just waiting for him to get to the fucking point

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>>42298918
I literally used to be that autistic too

this thread has me dyin

>>42298918
>>42299193
>>42303886
Used to be as autistic, but work and having to deal with people somewhat desensitized me.

do>fail>repeat until results are satisfactory.

>>42298476
Way to small

>>42303903
maybe you should stop being a filthy fucking nigger

>>42303691
hory shit

>>42298053
Oh jesus reading this made me feel physically shit

>>42298476
>drink my essence

>>42302999
Is this what purgatory feels like

>>42303359
>About to do squats at uni gym
>Ask a mate I know from another class to check if my back's straight
>He thinks I should keep my head up
>His mate steps in and disagrees
>They start fighting over other details
>Ask me to do it over without weight
>Continue arguing, drawing more people in
>Squat for a dozen men
>Fat guy steps in, "That's not a fucking squat, I'll show you squat"
>Grabs the entire rack and does 1/4th ROM
>Someone else yells "Pussy pad!"
>People start getting in each others' faces
>Complete gym brawl breaks out
>People barricade themselves behind bench sets
>Light dumbbells being tossed around
>Someone chucks a 60 pounder, feel the air swish past my head
>Angry skeleton smashing people with twizzler bars
>Girls tossing throwing kettleballs
>Everything is just a mess
>5 /PGL/ elite parashoot in
>Simultaneously deadlift 3000 pounds at once
>Everyone under 700 collective poons immediately falls unconscious

>>42296532
>>42301368
>wear a polo shirt
Don't do this.

>>42298587
Holy shit

>>42304490
unless you're indian because that's all they fucking wear seemingly

>>42296384
>5 dozen
>whole thread talking about 50 eggs
American education

>>42298053
>tfw you will never be a qt girl
>have to settle for being swole

>>42302920
Darmstadt

>>42303003
>wizard sleeve of a vagina

>>42296110
Guy who did GOMAD but forgot to eat on top of it.

>>42298860
>Pururin
Better times.

>>42304565
All the more reason not to.

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>>42296110

>>42298587
I just went to reddit and found some of the replies to all this. People are telling him it's normal to completely regret it and be super depressed. Jesus Christ, it's considered normal to hate your decision and then obviously have no choice but to live with it, so you convince yourself you made the right choice and then convince others to do the same thing. It's depressing more than anything

>>42298476
Who is Doug tho?

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>>42299081
lost

>>42304855
kek

>>42302657
its the opposite you mong

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can't belive nobody has posted this yet

>>42299459
I always wanted to know his reaction

>>42299459
Am I theo only one who has always called bullshit on this?
Sure, the perspective visualisation is nice, but is meaningless, as the guy didn't use it to prove the point he was making in his first post, rather just repeating what he said earlier. You could estimate his height fairly accurately this way, but only if you know for sure the height of the door or whatever, and rule of thirds from thereon.

Moreover, I'm 6'3", and my belly button is at about doorknob height too, so that doesn't mean too much, as it probably differs from country to country, or isn't a fixed standard height after all

>>42302755
>not posting the message
tf

>>42302755
I wanna see what it says m8

Anyone have the one where a guy stole a fuckton of protein from a GNC or something

Also does anyone have the one where a /fit/izen started a crow war