>go to gym >start workout >old men appears next to you

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>gym rabbi descended into the manlet pit 3 days ago
>bloody foreskins litter the floor around the pit
>judging by the shrieking he's still going at it

'the only god is my iron"

*fuck didnt say that right, cover head nervously a leave*

>>42071176
I lol'd

>Gym Imaam keeps throwing burqas at because I was rippetoe'd enough to look like a big ass-ed woman

>>42071228
what a meme comment

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>>42071144
>go to gym
>the gym jester replaced the dumbells with regular bells

>>42071186
Last time I deadlifted, I was alone at the gym. The feels were heavier than usual, so in my moment of weakness I caressed the loaded bar. I thought to myself "Iron will never lie to me."

I have to say, I felt a little better., but I think /fit/ is getting to me.

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>>42071284

>>42071144
>gym coroner forgets to close morgue doors
>gym freezes overnight
>all the plates are now too small to fit over the bars
>can't lift until they heat up again
>gym physicist predicts that they will take 2 weeks to warm up to operational temperature

What do?

>>42071144
>not making soul gains
I feel sorry for you, but I still love you with all my heart my son

>Monday is chest day
>decide to buy stocks in 45's since the demand will go up on chest day
>FUCKING CHAD benches from 5pm until the gym closes
>other members too anxious to ask to work in so he is the only one using the 45s to bench 6 plates
>45 price drops
>lose money on my investment
>gym kicks me out
>lose all my gains
REEEE fucking chad
to make it worse, chad went short on the 45s that day and made a 500% return
>drives around me on his lambo while i'm cycling to the gym poverty pit

>gym physician demands to inspect my penis during peak gym hours
>all the stacies are giggling as he makes me take my pants off
>measures my penis and ANNOUNCES to the whole gym that it doesn't meet the minimum criteria
>he gives me an ultimatum
>either I leave the gym or take HRT and transition.
>have until next week friday to decide
What do?

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>>42071144
>not confessing your sins to the gym priest before squat pr attempt

>>42071393
I had this problem before, just leave the gym furnace open overnight

>explain to the employees you need get your last pl8 forged for tomorrow
>"accidentally" leave the furnace open to warm up the gym.

Yeah the staff are going to be mad, but they will think it was just an honest mistake and will probably double charge you for furnace use, but at least you'll be able to lift. Hopefully your gym coroner doesn't do it again.

>gym driller struck tren deposit
>gainz for days baby

>>42071144

That poor dyel stuck on the chest fly machine and Santa Claus here is too busy posing for selfies to help him.

1/10 would not train at this gym.

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>gym falcon laid eggs in the squat rack again

>my fellow parishioners pray for protection from God, and for His blessings
>I pray for an empty squat rack and no t-rex mode while I do SS

>>42071900
Fuck dude, I wish I had a gym falcon to give me free protein! All we get is a gym goose that forces us to run from the cars and do fucking cardio before lifting. Everyone hates it, but the missing fucking eye of one jacked old black dude keeps us from trying anything.

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>>42071176
fucking kek

>>42071507
why didnt you challenge him to a sword fight?

>>42071969
The gym confiscated my sword after I OHPd in the squat rack

>>42071144
>gym bro has developed an avian fetish
>dresses in a giant bird costume and squawks every time he squats
why can't i make normal friends?

>>42071144
your fault for doing preacher curls

>>42071144
>gym priest
>not worshipping Brodin
Heresy
>http://bookofbrodin.wikia.com/wiki/Book_of_Brodin_Wiki

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>gym genie appeared today
>manlets took all the wishes

>Big Bro requires a height tax
>prolemanlets planning a revolution
it'll never happen, but they keep talking to anyone who is 6'1" and shorter, saying we'll be next

>>42071266
11/10

>>42071858
I chortled

How does no one else get this

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>lost my manlet gains on yobit dice