/fit/ I fucked up. Big time. I have to fight a person who is

>>41957568
Roll of quarters in your palm. Very subtle way to fuck someone up.

bring a pipebomb

Don't fight them

>>41957576
OP here, theres no way I could really avoid this fight sadly.

>>41957568
Need more info
Genders of both
Height of both
Weight of both
Previous fighting experience of both

>>41957568
Apologise, offer to make it right.
Make sure everyone sees so that they know the big guys now in the wrong. He'll usually back out due to social pressure.
If he still wants to fight make sure one of your friends calls the cops about 10 minutes before it starts so they can break the fight up before you get hurt too badly.
Don't fight back, let the big guy punch your face a couple of times so you've plenty of evidence later on if needed.

>>41957594
get a load of this fag

>>41957592

I see these threads semi-regularly and I don't fucking get it. In what situation are you in that you're DEFINITELY GOING to fight this person? Are you high school? Is he a work colleague? What the fuck?

I guess get brass knuckles bro, that's the only thing I can suggest.

>>41957568
>Buy a cheap BB gun with the orange tip
> spray paint it
> pull it out when fight starts
Works as long as you are far away enough

>>41957594
>Preemptively call the cops

>Let the other guy beat the shit out of you.

God damn you are a pussy.

>>41957593
OP again
We are both males
I am 6'1" and he is somewhere around 6'4"
I weigh 130 pounds and he weighs around 170 pounds
Ive taken some classes here and there on various martial arts and so has he from what I know

>>41957568
>I have to fight someone
???
>>41957598
I can only imagine its some brazilian fighting to protect his family from the favelamonkeys

>>41957568
Fight dirty. Kick him in the crotch, punch him in the neck, gouge his eyes, bite off part of his ear. Do what ever it takes.

>>41957597
Well he's physically fucked and too dumb to walk away. Being sneaky is the only way to win this one.

>>41957594
More importantly, call the cops on YOURSELF. So you get arrested. That way it makes the other guy look like a bitch.

>>41957617
All I can say is the more vicious and tenacious fighter will win. Give everything you have and if you lose you know you gave it your all. Dumb quote from football but applies to your situation is "its not the dog in the fight but the fight in the dog." Look up a thai clinch and throw knee to the gut then head. Elbows are vicious and protect your head.

>>41957568
just take a gun and shoot him dead the moment he moves towards you

>>41957644
Yeah, and also punch yourself in the face and call yourself a faggot to add to the assault and harassment charges

>>41957663
Thank you for the advice but how would I use elbows in a fighting setting like this? I cant just flail them around wildly, can I?

>>41957568
offer your pussy. in hopes they take mercy

Why the FUCK are you in a fight and why MUST you fight. Please explain these two things in detail right fucking now.

>>41957568
hit them in the nuts

>>41957692
While I was wasted I made a serious bet with a friend that I could win a fight against one of his coworkers. This bet is gonna put me under if I lose and I cant really back out of it considering I gave him the money already. Stupid, I know, nothing I can do about it now but follow through.

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>>41957568
>>41957598
this to a tee my mans, honestly i live IN THE GHETTO and involve myself in a shit load of seedy lifestyle choices and professions and i've only had fights "set up" in some distant time like i was a fucking league boxer when i was young and had shit to prove, what sort of shithole country are you living in with this fufu autistic machismo system of ethics still in place? personally if you don't even really know the guy all that well and he's not associated in any of your circles and it's not a public concern of anybody's that you're gonna fight him, just pull up man, bring a boy if you have too, just make him bitch made and whip him around with a steel a little and get him to fuck off; if you go through with fighting him and even if the tables were turned and you were nearly guaranteed to win and he got one lucky shot he could just stomp your head in while you're buzzing on the concrete and murder you or leave you drooling and shitting into diapers for the rest of your sorry ass life

tl;dr
>pull up, faneto
>take the risk of possibly getting killed or permanently handicapped just to prove something to some bitch ass nigga

>>41957568
jump on him with 10 of your niggers and break his kneecaps

>>41957688
Watch some muay thai youtube videos and try to get the idea I guess. Keep your hands on your face making fists to protect your jaw from contact. Bring elbows up to protect your face if they try to strike you. You can potentially at this point move within range of your elbows to his head, my coach told me to put the back of my hand on my cheek, then throw the elbow almost in a slashing (again I use the term vicious) motion from the top down on his forehead or face. Wrap him in thai clinch (look it up as well as muay thai elbow throws) and throw knees.

>>41957568
Just be yourself bro

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>>41957568

This works every time, granted you have a minute to talk to the bully face to face.

>Before confrontation, pack your crack with a handful of creamy style peanut butter.
>Get in bully's face and make piercing eye contact, no blinking, just retard-tier focus
>Say "You ready to do this, motherfucker?"
>Take 3 steps back and assume the orthodox fighting stance and do some neck rolls
>Then, just as the giddy circle of onlookers are at maximum excitement, take your right hand and reach back into your ass crack
>pull out a messy glob of what appears (to everyone else) to be soft, mushy, human feces.
>Pull out a clump of the peanut butter and eat it like a savage, never breaking eye contact with your foe.
>The sheer terror and confusion in his (gender assumption! guilty) mind will be enough to give you the edge in hand to hand combat.
>Odds are good that your opponent will back down from the confrontation

Please post the video.

>>41957827
>win the fight but now everyone thinks you're a literal shit-eater

hmm

>>41957598
you see them semi regularly, because they are a meme

>>41957617
so he's skelly and you're super skelly.

strike first, strike hard, strike places that really fucking hurt and will incapacitate him quickly e.g. eyes, ears, throat

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>>41957568
As soon as it starts
>Take your shirt off
Shows that you have experience
>Look at him straight in the eyes
Let's him know your confident
He most likely wants to fight because he thinks he can win.
>Take off your shoes
Proves that your not even considering on losing
>If he doesn't back down by now
Take off your pants and then followed up by your underwear.
People seeing you naked or getting beat up choose.

>>41957568
be more crazy than him, boot him in the balls as hard as you can and when he drops (pray that he drops) go full autismo on him

>>41957827
>>41957827
this is the only option

Bring a long flathead screwdriver

wow
being retarded has got to suck