Hey /lit/, how are your novels going? I've got a shit-load

>>39106814
Put the books down and grab some dumbells Melvin were gonna leave humanity today.

>>39106814
usually i watch my wife get fucked by two black men at once

that gets my dialogue-juices flowing

>wants to write a novel
>can't even read the boards

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>>39106814
>reading books
what a faggot

>>39106851
fuck

I fucked up

>>39106814
Today you write a new chapter in your life. Grab the bar and never look back. It's time to get big, cmon.

>>39106851
fuckin kek

>>39106814
Hey anon. This may be a mistake, but a good one. Get into fitness and be /lit/ at the same time.

>>39106834
probably a good idea, desu. I'm a large guy though, so should I start running or something first? I can bench press a decent amount but I don't work out often. I weigh 220 pounds and I'm 5'10, so I'm pretty fat, but i have decent strength (I work as a blacksmith)

>>39106860
Fuck it, I'm down. Writing never got me laid, I'm already big. How do I get like, uh, fit? Should I start doing cardio?

>>39106834
FPBP

>>39106887
Start with the sticky. Then once you have the knowledge and practice consult us again for whatever you need.

>>39106887
Pretend the sticky is a book and read it

>>39106887

scroll up to the top of the page and read the sticky, brother

welcome to the world of FUKKIN IRON BRAH

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>>39106834

>>39106887
READ
THE
FUCKING
STICKY

>>39106887
Well since youre a writer/reader id point you to the sticky so you can pinpoint your goal and then workout accordingly.

I wrote a 700 page sci-fi dealing with themes of political incorrectness, messiah-motif, race-mixing downfalls, psychedelia, unique environment, species, etc. in a flash of total commitment under the pretense that I would edit the thing and have it published in a year.
Then I started reading it and hated what I'd done, never got past page 250 in the editing process.
My mom loved it though, what a sweet-heart.
Seriously though OP, being fit is fucking sweet. You don't necessarily need to join a gym, it's easy enough to be conscious of what you eat, exert yourself physically in an enjoyable way several times a weak and strive for progressive advancement in whatever strenuous activity you pursue.
this may be a happy mistake for you :)
(i'm a huge advocate of gymnastic rings and cycling)

>>39106936
nigger i didn't know there was a sticky i thought i was posting to /lit/, but okay. I will.

It seems we're 'sposed to cut out liquor. i probably drink far too much anyways and I've been looking at cutting it out. I'll go out and buy a fuckload of chicken breast tomorrow, I already needed to do groceries.

It says that for gaining muscle milk is great, but I'm allergic to cow tit juice, is there anything else that's a decent replacement? Coconut or almond milk or something?

I've already commited to a better diet. Before tonights accidental posting i'd started dieting about 5 months ago. i started off at 270 pounds, and now I'm about 220, but I'd like to actually do it right now, instead of just smoking obnoxiously and starving myself.

BTW any advice on quitting smoking?

>>39106979
almond milk is fine. look you're making this way more complicated than it is.

STEP 1. GOOGLE 'TDEE CALCULATOR'
STEP 2. CALCULATE TDEE
STEP 3. DOWNLOAD MYFITNESSPAL APP
STEP 4. EAT LESS THAN YOUR TDEE AND TRACK YOUR DIET USING MFP
STEP 5. START DOING LIGHT CARDIO AND LOOK INTO GYMS IN THE AREA

then come back and post here

>>39106956
that actually sounds awesome. Seems very Dune-esque, I like it. Mine is a sort of small novel (about 250 pages) about an investigative journalist in 1974 Sacremento, who after breaking into a nuclear energy facility is hired by the corporation as a private investigator to look into shaddowy figures slandering them for the upcoming nuclear energy reorginization act. It's not as dry as it seems I swear.

>>39106956
I'd also like to add that if you are experiencing writer's block presently this is the last place you should be if that's a hurdle you'd like to leap over.
Fuck's sake, NO INTERNET WHEN IT'S WRITING TIME
Set aside the hours and during those hours you write, you have a word document open, a paper fucking dictionary/thesaurus and some baroque music. Also smoke cigarettes and drink copious amounts of coffee. Once writing time ends feel free to browse the chans, but you will not find the inspiration you seek on here (except from me teehee)
Have you read How To Grow a Novel by Sol Stein? He's a jew but makes some good points. Check out The War of Art as well by whatever his name is
good luck
if nothing else writing is an excellent exploration into the workings of your own psyche, desires, fears etc.

>>39107003
i've been doing that exactly, myfitnesspal is how I got down from 270 to 220, I'd like to actually get some decent biceps now though.

I hear girls like biceps, and I'd like to put my large stature to use (how do I get bikermode?)

>>39107006
cool man, psyched for you, beginning the creative process is exciting :D
but the mind is sharper when the body is fine-tuned as well

>>39107034
I actually finished the first book, I'm working now on a Canadian novel about a Miller who marries a Catholic Irish woman and has to deal with the backlash. This is in the midst of the Troubles and Fenian raids, mind you. 19th century stuff. Sounds very happy go lucky, but it's dark as fuck.

You're right. I need to be more iron-pill.

>>39107021
a curlbro in the making
i'm witnessing it with my own eyes

alright man here's what you do. google 'brosplit', pick any of the routines you find, do about 4-5 curl variations every other day and use the squat rack if the weight gets too heavy

>>39107069
That sounds like the stuff your grade 7 literacy class would torture you with.

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> it's an anon wants to write a book but gets jacked instead and realises he's a closeted homo episode
I like these episodes.

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>>39106979
fuck milk
fuck quitting smoking
lift heavy ass shit
eat lots of meat
make stew out of roasts and potatoes
make your own stock by boiling bones
eat livers
steam off large batches of veggies and keep them in the fridge to snack on with some olive oil, lemon juice and salt
cut out bullshit like cookies, white bread, spreads, sweet drinks
you drink water, ginger tea and coffee
God bless your gains and your novels

>>39107121
hahaha, nice. That's what I'm looking for, except with a subtle red-pill so kids don't just have to read maya angelo and shit.

>>39107103
Alright, I've found JW 531, which is apparently for beginner powerlifters, which sounds great because as I said I ride a motorcycle and wanna look the part (just a shitty jap chopper)

but plebbit says that brosplits are bad, so that means they're good, right?

>>39107169
who's that guy? his haircut is dumb but shit that's an attractive human. I'm not sure I'm a closetted homo, but i will admit that's a sexy guy

>>39107190

I fucking love liver, my bloodline is half irish and half german (both immigrants to canada, where I live now) so liver has been a mainstay my entire life, and now you're saying that shit can help me get big? that sounds awesome.

I don't like steamed veggies though, can I just eat them raw? raw carrots are GOAT

>>39107215
He doesn't know Zeezbrah

COME ON! FOUR SCOOPS!!

>>39107244
wh-what

>>39107215
>love liver
just don't eat too much because apparently it's quite unhealthy to consume too much Vit A and I believe there's about 500% the DRA in a pound? something like that. I eat it about once a week for dem mad micronutrients. For protein I stick to beef, chicken, tuna, sardines, eggs, beans.
Yeah raw veggies are great if you like them like that.

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>>39107215
>starting with JW 531
SS

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>>39107248
JOIN THE FIVE PERCENT C'MON!

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>>39107215
>who's that guy?
lol

>>39107252
SO HELP ME, THAT GUY SAID TO LOOK UP BROSPLITS, AND 5/3/1 SOUNDS LIKE THE BET BROSPLIT

what's a good brosplit to start with, first? I've already got the diet stuff down desu I eat 90% white meat.

>>39107272
man, /fit/ has very obscure memes

>>39107286
Start with bodyweight squatz, the bar should weight as much as your body
Use sandals when lifting to make sure you have a natural foot position
3.???
4.profit
See you in snap city brah

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>>39107275
don't listen to these guys
pick something that interests you and stick with it
consistency and effort are more important than intelligent programming, if only marginally
some will stay starting strength, some will say the 5x5 variation (the name alludes me), some may say an iteration of 5/3/1 which I believe is a strength routine and not a brosplit
a brosplit generally divides the days you exercise into separate muscle groups which you focus on for the day
if you have no base strength do a compound-based strength routine first like the ones mentioned above but if you are already decently strong (say 1.25x bodyweight squat, 1xbw bench, .7x bw overhead press, 1.5x bodyweight deadlift) it'd be advisable to do some sort of split for aesthetic purposes
really the best thing you can do is find something you enjoy and stick with it, rest appropriately, eat right and feel good
we're all gonna make it

>>39107315
i never got that picture. couldnt the faggot tell how heavy the bar was before walking it out? and 180lb is a heavy person. sure you can't squat it atg, but trying it isn't gonna snap you

>>39107275
he was trolling, told you the opposite of everything good probs since you asked for bicep stuff and curlbros are a joke on /fit/. look into SS and follow it. brosplits are a waste. 531 is for those with at least a year or two of training

>>39107338
> not using a squat plug

>>39107325
I can benchpress 250 pounds, and weight 220, I don't squat much, but play rugby once a week as a hooker, so i have decent legs

Anyways there's a 24 hour gym by my house. I'm gonna leave and sign up for a membership.

Thanks for all the advice, guys. I'll use a trip when I'm making other threads so that you guys can check in on my progress. I'll try and post on here once a week to keep myself consistent/keep myself commited.

>>39107338
Oh, fuck, okay. I guess I got had.
I really would like bigger biceps amongst all else, though. thanks for the heads up dudeski

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>>39107360
godspeed anon

were all gonna make it

>>39107360
>I can benchpress 250 pounds, and weight 220
you're bench 2pl8 and are asking for tips on lifting? gonna have to call some bs

>>39107432
I play rugby and work as a blacksmith, that's hwo much I bench. I don't lift as a hobby or more than a few times a month when i motivate my ass to go to the gym.

I literally have never put any thought or effort into lifting, hence why I'm asking.

I do however work in a blacksmith shop hammering shit all day, and have for a few years.

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>>39107360
>this guy from fucking /lit/ benches what i bench while im on roids and he doesnt even lift
then again i doubt his other lifts would be on par with mine

Sunhawk, is that you? Do you lift weights now?

>>39107448
nice man
you're going to weild that hammer like thor now that you're moving weights
try to work on your overhead press, watch some form videos on youtube, I think you'll love it.

>>39106979

For smoking, you need to replace it with another habit. This habit is going to be fitness, so you've got that covered. If you feel like reading another book, look into the power of habit by Charles duhigg