>I barely sleep >been 2 days in a row without been able

>>38525253

Try nihilism and apathy, works for me all the time.

[spoiler]You could also try not being a faggot[/spoiler]

You need a passion m80.

>>38525272
Been taking antidepressants since I was 15. Prozac kind of gives you this meaningless and nihilist vibe to everything, but also kills all your will.

I try to stop being a fucking faggot, but hell do I really need to keep pretending everything's fine?
My childhood was completely fucked by my mother who married one douche who every night tried to get into my sister's room and treated us like shit, to the point where my mom would act like that too.
My father is an alcoholic.
I've been in charge of the mental stability of this shitshow family since I can remember.
I can't express my feelings, people always think I'm trying to be decevious or manipulative
And when I do, people think I'm just pretending.

I'm smart, handsome, with a great body, no real problems aside from feeling empty all the fucking time.
Sorry for blogpost

>>38525325

That's the thing you don't pretend everything's fine, you accept that the entire thing and everything else is shit and just move on and act act accordingly to each situation.

You also shouldn't expect things to get any better, it just creates false hope when things dont meet ur expectation. Having low expectations is even better because it feels great when things surpass your low expectations

Also the fact that your thoughts in the op seem to be of an annoyance to means you're not utilizing apathy to it's fullest. If you're worried about your will dying out due to apathy, u either need to do mental gymnastic shit to prevent that or somehow not let that apathy get in the way of things you want to do.

>>38525253
Read eckhart tolle, it will free your mind from this hell. Trust Senpai

>>38525325
That is depressing as fuck. Fuck smiling

Sounds a lot like depressive rumination, ain't those fucking anti depressants suppose to make that go away? If you feel that shitty and your thoughts are like that then are they even working?

Ever thought about getting away from your family? You in therapy? Try changing psychologist until you find one you get a long with really well.

Sounds like you are going trough hell. I am going to drop you some links that i know have been life changing for people that are in that situation where they are depressed, suicidal, nihilistic and lost.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gwUJHNPMUyU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtiRzQMgBDM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxJzWcwcRd0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGIU0FtXr9o

>>38525253
Listen to the first few minutes of this https://m.soundcloud.com/thepowerofnow_part_1-2/01-practicing-the-power-of-now and see what happens

>>38525388
Funny you say that, I actually started believing in solipism because everytime I go with empty expectations, good things actually happen.
It's almost as if thinking of a positive outcome actually makes it impossible for it to happen.
>>38525445
Will do man.

>>38525466
My grandmother committed suicide through anti depressants, I stopped taking then since.
In fact, all my family has tried to commit suicide at least once (being with your best friend chillin and suddenly see your mother screaming and grabbing a knife to her neck while your father and friends of him try to submit her is not a really good experience). Well, my father didn't, but he confessed to me while in tears that if he didn't have to support my family, he would have killed himself long ago. One of the reasons I haven't killed myself yet is because of him.

I tried psychologists but ultimatedly decided that only I can stop whatever the fuck this is.

What the fuck does this have to do with fitnes?

>>38525535
Mental health

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>be me
>skinny dyel faggot
>been depressed and having trouble sleeping for a long time
>work a shitty 9 to 5 job
>all my coworkers hate me
>finances in shambles
>can't get laid but i visit a hooker to relieve my depression
>doesnt work
>some single mom i know invited me out on a date
>i go
>she brings her son
>fuck she wants a meal ticket for this kid
>go along anyway for a shot at some pussy
>dont get any
>me and the kid have fun though
>later i turn myself in to the cops for manslaughter
>pic related is me

>>38525445
>>38525502
This ain't gonna do shit for him.

>>38525526
Bro that is fucked. What the fuck. Is your family cursed or something? A lot of people say that going to psychologist don't really do that much. Its strange. Are they all incompetent or something? But yo, give those links a try.

>>38525555
Dunno mang, I don't know what's up with this bad karma.
I've gone to psychiatrists and psychologists, all of them agreed that only I can change how I feel.

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>>38525555
nice quads but you are wrong. he needs to learn how to fucking turn down the endless chitchat of his mind. thats exactly what my link provides. and if he has trouble connecting to tolles shit he should start learning to meditate.

fun fact most successful people of today came across tolle at some point in their life.

I don't sleep
Cause sleep is the cousin of death

>>38525325
Just saying, enjoy it. I loved Prozac,I could smoke like crazy and take tons of Molly. Ofc now it's gone and it fried my Seratonin recepters so they produce super slow. I relied on that shit. Tapered off slowly but took too much Molly after it all just went away.

Anyway that feeling of being a robot, enjoy the fuck out of it. When your off, holy fuck your gonna feel way too much. I'm afraid to go back on now because of Ed tho.