How do i become a real life batman, keeping in mind that i have

Your theme will be faint by linkin park.

Friendly script writers

>>38234284
Have your friends haze you by feeding you datura poison and waterboard you.

It won't kill you so you'll get stronger really fast.

Enjoy fighting crime x 1
Dead parent x 2
Develop unhealthy relationships with various criminals x F
Become addicted to fighting crime and try and use a no kill rule as justification for your addiction x F
Plot armor x 1

>Implying Batman isn't as crazy as everyone he fights

>>38234284
>How do i become a real life batman
u dont
>keeping in mind that i have a pretty good strength and endurance.
u dont
>dubs choose what my general theme is and trips decides what my costume will be
since u dont these will not be necessary

>>38234284
like you said man - you have pretty good strength and endurance. just grab a pair of dark PJs and go get em criminals. what do you have to lose? you're ready anon just go for it.

>Bodybuilder vigilante killed in gang shootout

>Four men are dead and several seriously wounded after a masked bodybuilder attacked a gang hideout in Detroit today
>Witnesses say the vigilante was dressed in a pair of pyjamas and a plastic Batman mask
>Unconfirmed reports indicate the vigilante yelled "LIGHT WEIGHT, BABY" while throwing gang members around

>>38234341
Sounds fun

>>38234284
if dubs you will be Scatman and you will finish every sentence with bee-bop-boo-bae-bee-baa

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>>38234455

>>38234284
You're going to have to hire some guys to kill your parents. It's the only way.

>>38234284
Forget about the physical training for a second. What about the mental training you'll need to take on big targets like the mob? Jeez brotha, being a vigilante is not just about muscle.

if you're not rich you can't be batman sry

if you're rich, give me some money

>>38234455
will do. autistic retards are fucking scary

>>38234423
audible kek

>>38234284
Take tren, buy some armor, beat the shit out of plebs til the cops find and beat you.

Go train across the world for 20 years.

Let us know when you're done so we can give you step two

>>38234284
go fuck yourself

>>38234284
5 years on a hellish island... Wait no

>>38234371
>"u" stupid nigger

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>>38234284
Batman was a Detective. What you need is some stealth gear from /k/ and a qt 3.14 weaboo gf from /g/, preferably with connections in the NSA, or local CERT.

>>38234284
you can't

a real life batman would never ever even think about the possibility of browsing 4chan

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>>38234284
rolling for trips -this is your new costume
naked besides this

>>38236650
rerolling

>>38236650
re-rolling

kek so close, fuck it do it

>>38236668
wew

>>38236650
agsdf

>>38236650
rerolling

>>38236650
rerolling for this

>>38236810
re-re-re-re-re-rolling

>>38234284
Inb4 swolemole

>>38236650
the cap looks nice, but going naked isn't exactly practical. think about another look

>>38236650
CMON ONE DAY YOU MAY (be rescued by captain dickhead)

>>38236934
If this is OP: Fuck off, you set the rules now if we roll trips you have to buy the damn hat and post pics

If not: Pick whatever complimentary outfit you'd like and Ill roll for both

>>38236650
RRRRRRRRRRRAWLING

>>38236950
it is. idk man, as i said the cap looks nice and i'll buy it, you won't see me make the news in the near future i'm afraid. as for the outfit

>>38234284
OP how tall are you and what do you weigh?

I think I have the perfect outfit!!!

>>38234284
>tfw know a jewish guy who is built just like batman
>tfw he's smart as fuck too

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You will a robin instead of a batman and your theme will be retro.

>>38236966
YOU ARE GOING NAKED CUNT YOU DONT MAKE RULES THEN BACK OUT REROLLLLLLLING NOW

>>38234284
Inherit billions of dollars after your parents are killed in an alley by a random mugger.

Im 5'6 and 250lbs why? whats the outfit?

no cape

>>38236991
>5'6
>250lbs
>wants to be a superhero

Just be an hero OP

>>38236991
>250lbs
>5'5

STAHP

>>38236995
Wear Hawaiian shirt and cargo shorts

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>>38236977
>>38236979
>>38236650
>>38234455
WHAT THE HELL DO I DO ?

>>38236650
ROLLING FOR CAPTAIN DICKHEAD ON A MANLET FATTY CMON

>>38236997
>>38236991
>>38237005
OP here, fuck that guy. I'm 6'1 and about 180 pounds. why are trying to meme this glorious thread you fat fuck

>>38236991
>5'6
ROLLING FOR SWOLE MOLE

>>38236650
REROLL

>>38237022
post pics OP if you look /fit/ enough i have an awesome outfit for a superhero

>inb4 no pics posted because OP is fatty

>>38237023
god dammit i'm not a fat manlet

>>38236650
this or swolemole

lets go

>>38237039
i'm not a fatty but i'm pretty dyel. i suppose i'll follow this guy's advice >>38235013 and get swole.

>>38237040
>fat manlet detected

>>38234455
This said EVERY sentence, so every time you think, talk or post here you must end it like this, if not you are never going to make it and you will know it deep inside.
>>38236650
Rolling, to be kind I will give you the option to keep clothes but only of the color of the dick, you can change colors.

>>38236650
RRRRRROOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLING

>>38236650
rerolling

>>38237139
rerolling

>>38237148
RRRERROLLLLLLIIIINGGGG

>>38237161
refuckingrolling for penis man

>>38237192
REROLLALLOOOLLAAAAA

>>38237208
rerrollll

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You'll dress as Nappa and like it you faggot.

You must dress as a different minimum wage job each time you strike

>>38237375
reroll

Your theme will be tard rage guttural yelling (think DNYGUUURHHHN) buy only when right behind your victim. Otherwise you will be completely silent. You will dress as the fusion of Chris Chan and Jason Genova. You will be named Clown Baby.

>>38237375
This is the best idea ever

>"help! He stole my purse!"

Do not fear ma'am, for I, garbage man have come to the RESQUE!