Got my girlfriend preggers. How do I kill the monstrosity before

get fucked moron

>>38104558
do what your dad did, but make sure you check for a pulse otherwise itll grow up retarded

>>38104558
I'm going to assume the worst, which is that this is not bait.
Go to an abortion clinic you literal fucking retard. Where do you live?

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>>38104586

>>38104597
Iowa. She's underage

>>38104634
phew lad phew

>>38104634
I'm assuming abortions are accessible there.
Can she go alone? If not, check if your state has a Romeo and Juliet clause on age of consent laws. This means that it's legal if the age difference is within a certain limit.

Don't fuck this up OP, if she has a kid at this age it's twice as bad

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>>38104558
Why not give the old cunt punt a try, anon?

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Thanks me later anon.

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>>38104558

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>>38104586

>>38104634
On the bright side the baby will probably grow up healthy

>>38104634
John is that you? You knock up another one?

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>>38104634
I can direct you to a clinic that suits her needs, but first you must tell me more about the patient.

t. doctor

>>38104743
>>38104749
>Tansy
>Pennyroyal
>Honey
Holy shit, dudes, this is fucking Moon tea.

>>38104634
Wew

She can still go to PP and get an abortion no matter how old she is, if she's underage she just has to say that her partner is the same age...

>>38104817
>>38104792
>>38104707
Forgot the catch. Parents are ex judo champions from Poland. They're ridiculously religious and cannot know.

Push her down the stairs
On a more serious note, i remember reading an article about this guy from norway, he mixed a drink with a bunch of day-after pills, gave it to his gf without consent, and it caused her to abort the baby.

>>38104743
I can totally vouch for this, in mexico villagers use it to get their wife or slutty daughters to abort if shit goes when they can't support another child, or the boyfriend does when he doesn't want that baggage.

It's alright OP. Just get out the baseball bat.

>>38104827
Doesn't planned parenthood or some shit do this discreetly?

>>38104827
Fucking kek im imaging OP being slammed by an angry Polish father.

>>38104827

kurwa! She doesn't need to go with her parents, unless she's 12 then u goin 2 jail anon. tell her to go with a friend otherwise you might as well sign up for the Babies-R-US registrar

>>38104827
>>38104749
>>38104743
Here's your solution dumbass. Now just get her to drink it every day

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>>38104586

>>38104897
>>38104817
We can't go without Her parental consent unless we go to court which will cost ungodly amounts of money.

>>38105005

Last alternative: drive to a different state for it

OP, if you're truly desperate and willing to leave everything behind, you can always join the French Foreign Legion as a nuclear option.

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Holy shit I actually have something for you. Screencapped this way back. Like it says in the pic I am not fucking liable for what you see here.

Nevermind, it doesn't say that but still fuck you this is fucked up.

>>38104558
orange juice and a lot of it

Papaya and pomegranate

>>38104558
Ya dun goofed

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>this is what actually happens to straight people

lmao desu lads

>>38104634
Massive amounts of vitamin C

>>38104634
Legal age in Iowa is 16, so she's 15 or under. Wew lad

>>38104558
It probably won't ruin your life. If you think it will then you're either 17 or legitimately a coward. I hate to break it to you, but you were probably going to end up living in a trailer anyways. Embrace the suck.

>>38104756
Huh. I've never thought about that aspect of teenage pregnancy.

>>38105451
Not OP, but elaborate what this screenshot is saying for the rest of the thread.

>>38105128
Kek. I wonder if all the guys in that are shitty.

>>38105573

no guarantees this works.

try it tho LOL

>>38105732
Various herbal supplements and such triggering uterine contractions, which will essentially cause a period regardless of whether an egg has been fertilized or not. Some anon posted this a while back talking about how he kept his girl from having a kid several times.

I will neither confirm or deny the efficacy nor endorse any use of this information. I've also never actually researched this, but just kept it.. in case.

>>38104827
>Parents are ex judo champions from Poland

Just have her spar with her parents.

>>38104827
>>38104558

Just marry her anon, and raise your child like a man.

>>38104558
dawg you should've gotten plan b the minute you came in her.