Long ago in a distant thread
A random writefag created a Tomoko diaper fiction
That writefag disappeared forever, but I have taken up the mantle. The story picks up exactly where the other left off.
If you haven't read the first one, do so.
Enjoy you /d/eviants
Original
https://pastebin.com/fC1hKqyA
Continuation
https://pastebin.com/rRcgq9Hh
bump
>>7482953
about fucking time
diaper thread? I'll contribute
reading...
bumping again
>Some light bondage in the story
finally
>>7482953
>Slow mind breaking
Best kind of story
>>7482953
Chapter 2 yes
Yuu becoming the sitter or the victim?
>>7482953
>>7482953 (OP)
>old thread nowhere near bump/image limit
>this thread filled with shitty western art
Way to fuck up you goddamn retard. Lurk moar before trying to contribute, jesus christ.
Am I on /d/ or /aco/?
>>7483229
We have diapers. Does it matter?
>>7483299
Emm... For me it does... (Just another anon)
gas this thread
>>7482953
>https://pastebin.com/rRcgq9Hh
>June 15th
Uh oh.
This is awkward.
>>7482953
While I appreciate the attempt, you completely lost the flow and attitude of the original author.
It was a third-person limited perspective and you abruptly give us Tomoko's mother's reasoning. I think that was a mistake.
Also, Tomoko's mother's attitude seems to have shifted to drastically more indulgent than the original without explanation.
Glad someone wanted to take a shot, but I would suggest revisions to keep in line with the natural direction the work was headed. Right now you can really sense the shift in author.
>>7483683
Thank you for your review :)
>>7483683
But anon...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UwbHS63GHB4
>>7483697
I have no problem with where the new author wants to end up, but he should properly connect the old story to his own preferences.
The story needs to move slower. The introduction of a babysitter that isn't a character from the series is, I think, a mistake. It's a mind-fuck. I think the original author was trying to make it like the original series where Tomoko's mom was only dealing the best she could with Tomoko's craziness and we had an unrealiable narrator. The new story makes her mom nuts as well, purposefully indulging her daughter to the highest degree in this stuff.
>>7483701
OP again checking in on thread
the babysitter was mentioned in the original and at first I assumed it would be Yuu Naruse, but then I figured it could have been a professional that her mother had spoken to.
As for the sudden indulgence, yeah I agree that went a little bit fast. I was going on the angle that her mother had been seeing her daughters deteriorating mental state and increasing agitation and thought this might be the way to fix it sort of as a last ditch better go all in effort.
Also I found myself relying on the plot device of Tomoko's own general paranoia induced incompetence screwing her over a little too much
>>7483299
As long as the art isn't too autistic then whatever
>>7483299
Yes, take your shitty ugly western art to /aco/ newfag.