What the hell are these things? Who built them? How do they

>>93576488
It's cars. Kids dig the cars.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2FxpNCvBV_s

>>93576488
they probably evolved from bugs.

>>93576488
>How do they breed?
We already have the answer to that.
Don't ever ask what it is again or someone might post THAT image. You will regret asking.

File: tumblr_osara5Bwix1s4493xo3_1280.png (675KB, 1280x874px) Image search: [Google]

675KB, 1280x874px

>>93576488
>>93576680
someone will surely post it anyways so I think I should make him cringe first in order to soft the blow he is about to receive.

File: tumblr_osara5Bwix1s4493xo4_1280.png (109KB, 840x458px) Image search: [Google]

109KB, 840x458px

>>93576766

File: tumblr_osara5Bwix1s4493xo2_1280.png (186KB, 1036x623px) Image search: [Google]

186KB, 1036x623px

>>93576789

>>93576680
>>93576766
>>93576789
What pic?! Show me!

>>93576766
>>93576789
>>93576817
The fuck? Who would make this and why?

File: IMG_2913.png (906KB, 800x1354px) Image search: [Google]

906KB, 800x1354px

>>93576680
You mean this

>>93576766
>>93576789
>>93576817
These are pretty cute.

File: tumblr_osara5Bwix1s4493xo1_1280.png (212KB, 1280x999px) Image search: [Google]

212KB, 1280x999px

>>93576817
also question, does his ass-cheek work as a blinker?

>>93576766
This is cute
>>93576789
NOW ITS WEIRD

>>93577034
we can say he need for speed sometimes and only that car give him the gran turismo.

Has this infamous image been posted yet?

File: Cars_3_D23_Poster.png (1MB, 600x859px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 600x859px

i like how the third movie is about pixar giving up and giving their mantle to wdas.

>>93576789
>>93576817
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QxAo6KhBFFs

>>93576821
Silly anon >>93576844
Now someone post the male one

File: ohyeah.png (15KB, 312x316px) Image search: [Google]

15KB, 312x316px

>>93577642

>>93577669
Where's the full pic anon?!

File: antro_car_male_reproduction_system_by_half_dude-d8pey4x.jpg (204KB, 666x1200px) Image search: [Google]

204KB, 666x1200px

>>93577642
Hey, you asked for it, not me.

File: reaction285.jpg (25KB, 736x576px) Image search: [Google]

25KB, 736x576px

>>93578907
>>93576844
>somebody drew this

>>93578964
>>93578907
>>93577693
>>93577669
>>93577630
>>93577582
>>93577564
>>93577388
>>93577034
>>93576867
>>93576857
>>93576844
>>93576842
>>93576821
>>93576817
>>93576789
>>93576766
>>93576680
>>93576638
>>93576600
>>93576488
The thing I really like about Planes is that we learn that WWII happened in the Cars universe. Which means there was a Cars Hitler, a Cars holocaust, a Cars Pacific War, a Cars D-Day, a Cars nuking of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, a Cars Rape of Nanking, a Cars Battle of Iwo Jima...
This leads to so many important questions, like: were the Cars Little Boy and Fat Man nukes sentient? Was it a suicide mission? Are ALL Cars nuclear weapons sentient? Did Tsar Bomba have a personality?
What kind of car was Car Hitler? A VW? A forklift?
Was there a Cars 9/11? Were the planes hijacked, or were the planes themselves radicalized?
I could go on

>>93576638
But hey, that's just a theory.

File: 1489074692738.jpg (19KB, 504x270px) Image search: [Google]

19KB, 504x270px

>>93579271
Now I want to see a Cars spinoff about Killdozer

>>93579271
Nevermind that, in Cars 2 there's a fucking Popemobile

Christianity exists in the fucking Cars universe. Pontiac Pilatus washed his fucking wheels.

>Captcha is cars

File: 1496276769139.jpg (136KB, 423x469px) Image search: [Google]

136KB, 423x469px

>>93579271
>or were the planes themselves radicalized?

File: JACKS.jpg (15KB, 318x318px) Image search: [Google]

15KB, 318x318px

The hell is this thread

>>93579319
a gay theory

>>93581265
the type of thread that used to casually happen on 4chan in its golden years.

File: thetruth.jpg (19KB, 1000x552px) Image search: [Google]

19KB, 1000x552px

>>93576488
>At Steve Purcell's spotlight panel at Comic-Con he showed this interesting drawing he had done while working on Cars:


>His theory was that there was this island with these cavemen on it, and basically a car would go there and pick one out. The caveman would plug their spines into the inside of the car and work as part of the brain (you can see the actual brain on top of the caveman's head). And that's how the car can move around, because a caveman is in there attached to the brain and manually turning the wheel.

stay woke

>>93579271
Now you are imagining the Saving Private Ryan scene of the D-Day, including the part where the guy is looking for his arm

>>93579271
oh please do go on~
>>93581480
>stay woke
we already are, please, continue

File: simpsons disturbed.jpg (56KB, 445x385px) Image search: [Google]

56KB, 445x385px

>>93576844
>>93578907

File: b8ecaa5e2126f9d7be2c657ee3f90154.png (2MB, 975x600px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 975x600px

>>93576844
>>93578907
>vehicle courtship is relatively animalistic compared to their human creators.
>two vehicles may mate rather spontaneously, going on nothing but physical attraction.
>many males may even have multiple partners since such a thing is not instinctively taboo to their kind.

>>93579608

>there's a Cars God

what would he even look like?

>>93576867
Lord I hope so.

File: Homer_facepalm.jpg (64KB, 732x474px) Image search: [Google]

64KB, 732x474px

>>93576844
>We will never have a Cars thread where this doesnt get post.

File: 1200px-1962_Ferrari_250_GTO_34_2.jpg (80KB, 1200x723px) Image search: [Google]

80KB, 1200x723px

>>93582081

>>93579271
If the bad guy in Cars 2 is anything to go by, Hitler was a VW.

File: Hitler's_Happy_Portrait_Education_for_Death.png (139KB, 475x348px) Image search: [Google]

139KB, 475x348px

>>93582081
like a human.

File: 1498878062031.png (74KB, 613x927px) Image search: [Google]

74KB, 613x927px

Kerchoo

>>93576766
>>93576789
>>93576867
I think greg loved his car WAY too much

That one car in Cars 2 with headlight eyes just adds to the confusion.

..

anon you never heard the pixar theory?? theyre basically evolved toys from toy story remaking human society

File: MatPat is bad for america.gif (2MB, 480x259px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 480x259px

>>93576488
>>93576600

If we're going to come up with a better explanation than Matpat's latest brain turd, the first thing we need to establish very fucking clearly is that the cars are indeed mechanical. They consume fuel, like, real fuel. Gasoline, diesel, etc. They replace parts of themselves. They are made of metal, hence the ability to rust. They are very clearly machines.

The obvious explanation of what the cars are is that they're us, or more accurately some combination of us and the evolution of our current dalliances with AI, self-driving cars in particular. As our machines become sentient, they integrate into our culture, forging identities of their own; a new kind of synthetic "human."
They don't make their mechanical bodies humanoid, because that's stupid. But we do want them to be expressive, so they incorporate advanced materials that provide strength and flexibility, so they mimic human faces.

Eventually, biological humans die out, or else our increased understanding of synthetic cognition lets us upload our minds into computers. Really it doesn't matter what happens to us. Whatever the exact path, our species—as defined not by our DNA, but by our ideas about ourselves—evolves into a fully synthetic form.

If we do directly survive into the modern era, we absolutely take on the forms that synthetic intelligence has been occupying for decades, because really, they're just better. But at this point everything is synthetic anyways, so there's no point in differentiating formerly-biological humans from the larger native synthetic population.

And then we start expanding this new, synthetic ecosystem, replacing our livestock with machines that can help meet our new needs, controlled by simple intelligence that make them seem almost animal-like. Hence the tractor-cows and car-bugs.

This easily explains why the cars have a history and a culture identical to ours—it IS ours. they're a continuation of humanity, either literally or spiritually.

Who built them?
Disney Marketing Department.

>>93585322
Basically what I'm saying is, it's the movie Robots, but instead of retarded humanoid robots, they did the sensible thing and made themselves cars.

1.They're humans but cars.
2. They evolved since they replaced humans.
3. Normal food. They drink oil but there is probably multiple kinds like water oil and soda oil, etc.
4. They evolved like us.
These are my theories. You got me on the birth and breed question.

File: 1495854004240.png (439KB, 750x500px) Image search: [Google]

439KB, 750x500px

>>93579271
>planes themselves radicalized