Transformers 5 is one of the best /co/ to live-action adaptations

>>93434116
>BVS

God damn, I wish you contrarians would fucking disappear.

>inb4 being called a shill for something

>>93434116
so it's shit?

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>>93434116
>villain is essentially a lobotomized Unicron
>Optimus is a villain for no reason
>first half of the movie is dedicated to finding a macguffin that serves no purpose later

Also, pic related. Justify their existence.

>>93434116

In the fourth Transformers film, Mark Wahlberg kills a man by knocking him out a window with a football.

I have decided not to see Transformers 5.

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>>93434363
I want you to think very carefully about that sentence

>>93434116
I'm going to automatically hate it if Michael Bay works on it

>>93434394
I just watched that shit yesterday to get it off my list, he threw the bakk at his head to distract him then he rushed the guy, and forced him out the window

>>93434397
>implying she's not

>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.
So a terrible movie that morons will defend for years to come?

>>93434363
Okay there Walt.

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Every idiot always says "Transformers is just a turn your brain off popcorn film! Just enjoy it for what it is!"

No, it's fucking not. Marvel movies are turn your brain off. 300 is a turn your brain off. Star Wars movies are turn your brain off.

Transformers are simply poorly made, period. Unenjoyable on every level. It has nothing to do with the story, I could enjoy them just fine if all they had was decent action, but they don't have that. The action is typically impossible to follow, with constant cuts to the perspective of the humans where you can't tell what the fuck is going on in the background. The robots remind of the cartoon characters in Coolworld or Space Jame in how they have absolutely no weight and don't feel like they're really there.

The few times you can actually see the action, it's like a bad anime with characters spinning around effortlessly slicing through everything nearby. The attached gif is about the quality you typically see in slow-mo shots in Transformers movies, or that one clip of the girl dodging the bullet by flopping her tits, except at least that is intentionally funny.

The simplistic characters, the lame comedy, the out of place softcore pornography, the nonsensical plots? All that is just par for the course in Hollywood, and would be tolerable if the Transformers were cool in these movies. But they're not, they're awful cartoons poorly superimposed onto the screen. There is simply no appeal other than the name "Transformers". You can just look at some pictures of the robots in the movie and it would have the same effect as watching the films without wasting two hours.

When people say "I liked it, it's just a turn your brain off movie" I can only imagine they spent half the time on their fucking phones and would have said the same thing no matter what the movie was as long as it said Transformers in the title credits.

If you're gonna watch a "turn your brain off" movie, watch one that is actually cool.

>>93434341
>>first half of the movie is dedicated to finding a macguffin that serves no purpose later

so it's exactly like the other 4 movies

>>93434116
B-but anon, there's a female character in a major role! Therefore it's bad!

>>93434257
>Calling someone a shill for disagreeing with them

Isn't that your job? Oh I'm sorry, "Snyderfag" is totally different.

I can't watch the new transformers. The female lead is a 14 year old girl. Michael Bay has sexualized every single female lead in all of his movies. I'm not going to watch a movie that tries to convince me to bang a 14 year old girl. I can tolerate awful, awful movies, but I draw the line at pedophilia.

>>93434477
Huge ass wall of text for entirely subjective problems

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>>93434477
This pasta sums it up pretty well. I never understood how people always said Transformers was a "turn your brain off" when at least sixty percent of the running time in each of them is dominated by the human characters absolutely no one gives a shit about that.
That, and there just dreadfully, dreadfully awful films.

>>93434507
it's not against the law somewhere

>>93434484
like a whole lot of transformers shows?

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>>93434397
>>93434462
I want her to call me "Daddy"

>>93434529
More like objective

>>93434507
She's barely in the movie

>>93434507
Don't worry, mate. Even Bay forgets about her and she disappears a bit into the movie.

>>93434394

If you said it was Jason Statham doing that in a Crank sequel, I'd be in heaven already.

Anyway, have they done Unicron yet?

>>93434477
Cry some more

>>93434568
>Just Jared at the bottom right
Surprisingly fitting.

>>93434602
>>93434529
>After months of "NO NO NO, JUST YOU WAIT, TRANSFORMERS 5 IS GOING TO MAGICALLY BREAK THE TREND AND BECOME KINO", bayformer fans are forced to come to terms with the fact that it's utter fucking trash
>Unable to admit defeat, they begin to throw temper tantrums and shitpost harder

Sad part is, everyone could see this coming a mile away

>>93434600
He's Earth

>>93434477
Pretty much this

>>93434600
Next movie

>>93434646
Tfw2005 is that way crybaby >>>>>

So are we actually gonna talk about the movie or pointlessly shitpost?

The Cogs...Cogsworth his name is Cogsworth from now on- Cogsworth was entertaining. The uhh...female professor served her purpose of becoming a love interest well.
And main character dude...he...did stuff too. I honestly don't remember any of their names.

What the FUCK was the purpose of the WW2 flashback?
Is that just them teasing the Bumblebee movie?
Are we getting a prequel thing with that?

>>93434116
So I take it the Armond White review came out?

>>93434679
Also the dude in Cuba was fucking great. Just some robots playing soccer and shit in Cuba with sunglasses. That was fucking ridiculous I loved that shit.

>>93434678
The only crybabies here are the ones who get pissy at the negative commentary about it :^)

>>93434679
Hot Rod was criminally underused

>>93434704
Stop being such a crybaby

>>93434698
>Just some robots playing soccer and shit in Cuba

My only problem with this is that Cubans don't really play soccer. We like baseball and boxing. That's why we're everywhere in MLB but nowhere to be found at the World Cup.

>>93434116
I find it hilarious how people shit on these movies and praise Marvel bullshit, when in reality theres very little to set them apart aside from RT scores.

>>93434725
Cry harder
Defect harder

That isn't going to fix this fucking garbage heap of a movie

>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.
Well, I'm definitely not looking forward to it now.

>>93434747
Whatever you say crybaby

>>93434602
I'm just calling you simpletons on your bullshit.

I rarely look down on people for liking something I don't, but Transformers movies are the exception. People who honestly like them are either the most braindead people on the planet or the kind of people who like every movie because they barely pay attention to them.

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>>93434705
They introduced SO MANY THINGS that it honestly ends up feeling like it was too short to properly use- like. It feels like an expanded universe would be perfectly to extrapolate all the shit they couldn't fully examine.

Three hours was NOTHING compared to having the time to properly examine that "Hitler Killing Robot" the WW1 robot, the cuban futbal robot, the Cogsworth robot, the french Hot Rod robot, why there's mini dinobots, how Megatron got his body back, the new Decepticons and what they did to get arrested, the new systems in place-

There's like 6 movies worth of content crammed into three hours with no time to examine any of it.

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>Bumblebee magically gained Waspinator-tier survival powers
>Every other bot dies from a head shot or some shit

That just bugged the crap out of me.

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I thought little brown latina lolis were automatic win for /co/?

>>93434743
>Transformers playing baseball

I really wanna see this.

Like imagine some autobots and decepticons are just chilling in cuban neutral turf talking shit playing baseball. That- that would be the shit. That could actually happen in this movie.

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>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.
Alright, reaction thread go.

>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.

so it's shit?

>>93434418

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07LuAmoc3a8

2:39

That is some luney tunes shit.

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What's everyone's opinion on the first movie?

Personally thought it was a pretty entertaining movie

>>93434116
The editing was really bizarre, like the aspect ration kept changing. It wasn't even during action scenes, it was in the dialogue scenes too.

>>93434883
>that girl
>15 years old

hollywood can fuck off with this shit

>>93434679

Bumblebee movie is set in the 80's with Hailee Steinfeld.

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>>93434744
>very little to set them apart aside from RT scores.

>>93434912
PHONE POSTER

But yeah it was- it was a Michael Bay movie.
I literally can't imagine what the next movie is going to look like without him.
It's so ingrained that these movies are just generally bad and so on I can't fathom what an actually competent transformers movie will be like.

>>93434911

It's mostly coherent. The limited number of autobots means they get something resembling a personality.

The doctor autobot died horrifically in one of the later movies.

>>93434678

I thought TFW2005 is for people who LOVE the movies?

>>93434883
>>93434934

That 15 year old girl has more sex appeal than my entire asian sisters, mother, aunts.

>>93434841
>the Cogsworth robot

Still mad.

You don't namedrop Headmasters and NOT let him do the Headmaster thing despite there being multiple times where it would be a good time to do it.

>>93434984
Who should direct the next Transformers movie?
Who should direct the Bumblebee film?

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>>93435010
>asian sisters, mother, aunts.

>>93434646
Thank you for proving >>93434489 right

>>93434911
When it came out I was my age put my precisely in it's target group, so I loved it back then. Now, I guess it's decent for what it is, certainly better than all the later ones (not that it says much about it)

>>93435046
Asuka probably gives a mean blowjob.

>>93435037
>Who should direct the next Transformers movie?

Literally anyone who gives a shit. How about Dan Trachtenberg, the guy who did 10 Cloverfield Lane?

>Who should direct the Bumblebee film?

Someone with a little talent.

>>93434705
Why the fuck did they make him French? They could've brought back Judd Nelson, he's not doing anything.

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>>93435079

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>People openly like capeshit
>Transformers brings exactly the same shit (cgi, no story, bad characters) to the table but is openly hated

>>93434116
>Transformers 5 is one of the best /co/ to live-action adaptations of all time

No. It's not

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>>93435116
>no story, bad characters

The best superhero movies have some substance to them.

>>93435115
She definitely uses teeth a lot.

>>93435138

Why are you replying to a bait poster?

>>93435104

Why did he have a time stop gun and why wasn't he using it constantly?

>>93435115
I miss HBK "YOU MUCH TOO MUCH."

;_;

>>93434477
I liked the first film.

>>93435017
I really wanted him to turn into...I don't know. A piano?
Whatever the hell someone as small as him would transform into. Like a desk? A hearty nightstand?

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>>93434257
The only shills here are the desperate Paramount interns.

But Half in the Bag told me it was bad.

>>93434394
An AMERICAN football! The most commonly found item in any random Chinaman's apartment.

>>93435171
Are you really asking why Bay added a slow-mo gun?

>>93435246
Combine with the castle and become Fortress Maximus

Give it to me straight, /co/. How was Unicron?

>>93434883
>>93435010

I love using my white priviledge to steal mexican manlet's beautiful latina girls. I pound tons of latina pussy. feels so fucking good.

>>93435394

Sir Not Appearing in this Film.

>>93435394
very earthly, really in his prime desu

>>93435394

All you see are his horns he's earth

>>93435430
>>93435429
Once again, Bay never fails to surprise yet disappoint me.

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>>93435394
Ground bound for the time being.

>>93434690
It did indeed, and was even more glowing than usual.

>>93434911
I like all of the first three. even rotf. At least compared to the last two films.

>>93434911
It's alright but I liked the third one the best. That part with the soldiers in the toppling skyscrapers was probably the best action set piece of the franchise.

>>93434489
>Snyderfag
>Thinking I'm praising BVS

So do you learn English in the next grade?

>>93434568
Is she jewish?Looks like a little gal gadot

>>93434911
It was mediocre with some moments that worked.

>>93435765
Nigga, she a spic. She's probably Roman Catholic if anything.

>>93434341
She's cute and her story should have been more developed.

>>93434477
Nah.

The entire franchise is about giant alien robots transforming into vehicles and fauna. Of COURSE it seems stupid when you rationalize it, but so does any other movie. If you can't enjoy it for what it is then you are missing the point.

>>93434911
Everyone always says it's the best of the series but I really disagree. The only better part was that the plot was actually coherent. The characters were still unlikable and the action was incomprehensible garbage.

>>93435116
They're both brainless but the Marvel movies you can actually tell what the fuck is going on during action scenes. They're legitimately "turn your brain off" unlike Transformers where even the action is just trash.

>>93435891
You didn't read the post at all. It's not about it being stupid. I could enjoy it if it were just stupid with cool action. But the action isn't cool, it's impossible to follow and feels like weightless cartoon characters superimposed on the screen.

I'm not bashing it for being mindless action. I LIKE mindless action. It's just the action is horrible.

>>93435891

>f you can't enjoy it for what it is then you are missing the point.

Except the action is trash so I can't enjoy it for that.

I watched the fist four and I got my lifetime supply of watching robots roll on the ground punching each other culminating in a slow-mo decapitation with a sword or explosive headshot by the midway point of 2.

Also brainless action movies aren't 2.5 hours long, Bay can go fuck himself with the length of these trash fires.

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I liked TF1 and most of DOTM but this movie was complete shit. The only things I liked is that the robots got more screen time and the robot designs in general were better. But there was so much pointless shit and all the jokes were shit. I think I only laughed at one joke in the entire movie. The entire subplot with the mexican girl was pointless and Optimus Prime was only evil for all of 2 seconds until Bumblebee magically got his voice back.

>>93436048
You could actually see what was going on in the movies too by the way.

Also- WHO was the submarine at the end? They never walked around or anything.

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Holy shit you weren't joking. This will literally be the BvS of Transformers

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>>93434911
It's still the best one and it's easily the most rewatchable.

Fuck, the CGI in TF1 practically looks better than the TF movies now.

>>93436185
>40 more minutes

Literally what the fuck are they gonna have in it?

>>93434886
A movie about Autobots and Deceptions playing football and becoming friends.

I'd love that.

>>93436192
The CGI still holds up great, but I don't think it compares to TLK. The Optimus vs Bumblebee fight is legit some of the best CG I've ever seen

>>93436210

>Literally what the fuck are they gonna have in it?

40 more minutes of Anthony Hopkins explaining the lore that nobody cares about.

You can tell a franchise is well and truly done when it just becomes about explaining itself and adding extra layers of plotting that don't serve anything.

>Shia Lebouf got killed offscreen

heh

>>93436368
>Not wanting more Hopkins and Cogman

>>93436491

>Not wanting more Hopkins and Cogman

I came here to watch a movie, not listen to the screenwriter ramble on about his Dan Brown fanfiction in lieu of an actual narrative or characters.

>>93436048

>mexican girl was pointless

It only seemed pointless because your cock kept craving more. She was qt. I hope the >>93436185 Ultimate Edition will have more brown loli.

>>93434744

You're wrong. Transformers movies actually look visually great. Marvel movies are like direct-to-tv movies that just attract hipsters that like jumping on the bandwagon until the superhero boom dies out.

>>93437490
>Transformers movies actually look visually great.
No, they don't.

>>93437716
>Being so contrarian to say Transformers movies don't look good

Nigger even the critics who hate on this shit the most still admit the CGI is great

>>93437765

>Nigger even the critics who hate on this shit the most still admit the CGI is great

The CGI looks good but the color saturation ruins the frame, it's like watching someone cum Skittles all over the film stock.

And that spinning camera trick he stole from Tony Scott is still terrible.

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She was the best part of the movie. I hope her character gets fleshed out more in the future movies with a better director.

>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.
That it is, in that it is terrible.

>>93434116
>it's similar to BvS
So it's fucking garbage?

>>93437951
>>93437917

BvS is loved by true DC fans. Unless your a casual that believes "MUH SUPES IS ALL-STAR," "MUH BATS IS BALE," "MUH WONDY IS THICC." It's like you idiots aren't even aware of the multiverse.

>>93438155
You forgot to say it's too deep and ramble on about horrible symbolism to old art

Cogman and Hopkins was cool
French time-stopping hot rod was cool
Nice to finally see some decepticons with distinct characteristics and "personalities" instead of pointy robots constantly speaking like an AOL dial-up machine.

>>93434911
They had a robot pee on a federal agent.
For no discernable reason.
It was infantile, pornographic, barely coherent and focused on lame teenage wangst while making the action an utterly unwatchable mess.
Absolutely the strongest film in the series as all the others have the same flaws, just worse.

It's sad that givin the absolute retardation of some of our denizens there is a possibility that the OP is not bait that saddens me

The movie, like every other Bayformers is absolute trash, no amount of contrarianism from your end is going to do that

>>93435293
That's a lie.
They never watched it and released 18min of black screen.

>>93438523
*is going to change that

>>93436444
"last living"
Oh shit yeah he's fucking dead.

I imagine it must've been a very embarrassing thing for the autobots considering they never mention him again. Like shit. Maybe he died jerking off or some stupid shit like that.

>>93438531
It's one of the few RLM videos I didn't like

I wanted them to talk about how bad it was

>>93434911
It had the best human characters.

Really, why did NSA Girl and Black Friend not come back?

>>93438523
You don't like it and I do. Who cares? We just shitpost about it because it gives us a semblance of meaning to otherwise pointless topics in our pointless lives.

>>93438671
NSA Girl didn't want to return and Funny Fat Black didn't have enough time to record his lines as Jolt.

>>93438671
Because that would be a good decision

>>93434477
This^10

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Why was Anthony Hopkins allowed to behave so perverted around her? It's like no one cared for how inappropriate his actions were.

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>>93439009
>Fifteen years old

Fucking hell

>>93435791
>>93435765
>>93434568
>>93434363
She is Peruvian

>>93439083
that's just not ok

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She wore a Transformers dress to the China premiere. Why is /co/ not impressed by this?

>>93439009
Because Michael Bay is a pedo.

>>93439009

In the movie, outside of it, both?

What did he do?

>>93439891
Anon it's just a /tv/ shitpost meme

They like to make things sexual like that

>>93437876
She's actually a good actor and her character is far more interesting than Market and Shia's protags.

>>93439891

The cast was in a room together and Anthony Hopkins had his arms wrapped around her and was groping his hand up and down her sleeveless arm. She also had shorts or a skirt on and looked sexy as hell. There's no way Hopkins didn't cure his erectile dysfunction during it.

Someone post the webm.

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>>93440034
Give her a couple years and she'd make a perfect Casca for a Berserk adaptation

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>>93440105

>>93440278
You just KNOW

>>93440278

I'm jealous of her. I wish Hopkins would fondle me.

>>93438602
Didn't Sam become part or whole Transformer in one of the canons?

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>>93434116
Cool story shill

>>93435765
You're fucking retarded, gtfo

>>93434477
yup

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>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.

This movie dissapointed me. if earth turned into unicron and fought cybertron i would have loved this movie

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>>93434341
I actually saw the leaked final scenes on YouTube.

Optimus is all like

>"I AM NEMESIS PRIME FOR BRANDING PURPOSES!"

>Bumblebee talks, which is something he could kind of do all along.

>Listening to Bee talking convinces Prime not to be evil anymore.

>Other Transformers are about to lynch Prime's ass.

>Mark Wahlburg intervenes by showing the angry mob Excalibur, which is actually a Cybertronian weapon and shit.

>The other transformers somehow agree not to execute Prime because 'look I have a magic sword'

>Prime promises to stop being evil.

>>93434116
kys

>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.
So it is terrible? Make up your mind.

As a fan of the first film, and thought the rest were bad due to lack of focus on the robots or boring pacing, i felt this movie was the best in the franchise because there was a lot of transformers action, the pacing was fast so u were never bored, everything was well shot, it had more interesting characters than shia lebouf and megan fox, best distinct robot designs in the franchise so far, i really dont see whats not to like here unless you expect amazing acting and deep characterization in a fuckin action movie about robots. I applaud michael bay for leaving the franchise with a bang, and the best installment in his series of film. 100% genuine opinion. People that hate this are expecting something they that this movie isnt trying to be...

>>93435005
It was. But it's slowly being invaded by nitwits who proclaim "Paramount is dead!"

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This is an excellent film and I will be watching it all year

Thanks Hasbro

>>93443797
If they had a strong hand in all this you'd think they'd want more iconic looking Transformers than the terrible messes we got.

>>93438311
I agree with your first two points and most of your third. While I like them, the Decepticons introductions felt like it was trying to copy Suicide Squad.

And they cheated us again with Onslaught, slapping a big name on someone with more bullets in his head then words in his dialog.

>>93443973
Hasbro are the ones who originally didn't want the characters to even have dialogue. The studio actually fought to have them talking.

>>93434679
You know, if it's just him at Hot Rod, a WWII Bumblebee movie could be pretty neat

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>>93435010
Bet shes had more sex than you too.

>>93441692
>earth is unicron

The worst idea ever. Completely removes Unicron even more than if they made him a cloud or something, since you can't fucking fight or blow up Earth.

>>93444658
better yet?

a sports movie about Simmons and Topspin in a volleyball tournament

>>93444678
protip: unicron is almost never actually fought anyway

>Best /co/ to live-action adaptation.

Yeah, I highly doubt Michael Bay could beat out Ghost World or Red. Hell, I'd be surprised if he could beat out X-Men, and those movies sucked.

>>93440315
Sherlock solved the case in his sleep.

>>93442357
>Excalibur is real.
>But the scabbard isn't even mentioned.
Hate this shit so much.

>>93444678
>if they made him a cloud
Now what sort of retard would do something so stupid as to redesign a character into a cloud....oh, right.

>>93434116
I want Cat in the Hat live action edited in that pic.

>>93437490
>Transformers movies actually look visually great.

No.

>>93444629
Incorrect. Other way around.

>>93434911
Although less prevalent, and noticeable, TF1 suffered from many of the same problems the sequels had, but it at least had a semi-coherent story, unlike the later entries, so it remains the best of the Bayformers franchise.

>>93437876
I'm surprised they didn't pick her for the Bumblebee spinoff

>>93434116

Bay please go

>>93434600

Goddammit we need a new Crank film, second one was amazing.

>>93434116
I always thought Michael Bay and Todd Howard looked alike

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Michael Bay is a great man

>I don't change my style for anybody. Pussies do that.
Michael Bay

>We don't make movies for critics. I've done four movies; there's millions upon millions upon millions of people who've paid to see them. Somebody likes them. My greatest joy is to sit anonymously in a dark theater and watch it with an audience, a paying audience.
Michael Bay

>I love doing big movies. It's awesome! You have all these toys. The thing I like about this movie is, like they always say, directors have the biggest train sets! Don't tell anyone, but I'd do this for free.
Michael Bay

>>93434856
Modular Bumblebee was one of the few moments in the movie I thought was legitimately cool.

>>93435116
The Marvel movies may be juvenile and dumb but they don't feature jokes as bad as "robot humps Megan Fox becuz she's hot XD"

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3>1>2>4>5

>>93447393
Nothing could be worse than 2

>>93447018
Michael Bay is edgy, big deal

>>93447393
No
1>5>3>4>2

>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.

Thanks for the warning, anon

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Cogman was GOAT.

Put him in the next cartoon or the IDW comics please.

>>93447821
>>93447393

I loved the movie.

5>1>4>3>2

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>>93447821
>>93449300

How can you justify the last knight?

Most of the movie is a bad blend of RotF and DotM.

>barricade suddenly alive after dying in dotm
>galvatron and his KSI transformation in aoe didn't mean shit in this movie, became megs again??
>the kids didn't serve a single purpose in this movie except jailbait tits
>fucking rewritten history with camelot and nazis...
>60% of the movie is a failing treasure hunt, chase, and history lessons
>bumblebee is suddenly immortal and can reattach himself??
>decepticons intro was fun but straight up stolen from SuSq
>nitro zeus the only decep with a personality is a lazy KSI Boss + Shockwave head design.
>optimus hardly appears in the beginning, only to appear as a penultimate boss near the end
>the final sequence was 90% shit falling and 10% fights
>bumblebee took the spotlight again and again, 'nemesis' even had problems taking him down untill deus ex machina voice repair
>optimus kicks megs through the wall, gives a victory speech 20 seconds later

And more...

>>93449599
>>barricade suddenly alive after dying in dotm
Turns out he survived
>>galvatron and his KSI transformation in aoe didn't mean shit in this movie, became megs again??
What did being Galvatron really mean anyway? "Galvatron" was SUPPOSED to be a new robot who was a fake transformer, but turns out he was actually Megatron, it was not their intention to actually bring back Megatrons mind but they ended up doing it by mistake

So, yeah I mean it kind of seems weird but why would Megatron use the name humans gave what was supposed to be a new robot built of his parts anyway
>>bumblebee is suddenly immortal and can reattach himself??
Something something, utilizing transformium, the Stingers, etc etc

I mean the Stingers could do that, remember the Rainbow Dash scene? If humans could figure out a way to make better transformers I don't think it's too far a stretch to assume a transformer could figure something out similarly

I didn't see the movie yet

>>93439664
aw thats really cute.

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>>93434477
>not being able to turn your brain off
True autism
I don't regret a single thing about seeing this movie
>the action
It amazes how people can never follow it, it's not that hard. Just focus on one thing at a time.
>the women
It's 2017, who cares anymore? If it triggers you, just don't pay attention to it.
>the bots
Pacific Rim was essentially the same thing, only larger. If you can't follow the action in the TF movies, I doubt you can follow that.
>the running time
We're all going to die someday anyways.

>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.

You mean in that the movie is hot garbage and all the negative reviews are 100% correct?

Wasn't there supposed to be a Prime vs. Megatron fight? I remember from the trailer Megatron smashes Prime's face against a wall or something.

>>93435477

I honestly thought that if anyone other than Optimus Prime had suggested to Unicron that Humanity was his progeny, then Unicron would have gotten behind it 100%.

>"Check it out, look at all these wars and violence and shit. Look at all the chaos, all the horrible shit they do to each other over nothing! If you gave them some time to get their shit together and fully develop space travel, they'd be the greatest heralds you'd ever employed. An entire race of super violent, destructive, all-consuming psychopaths that will rape their way through the cosmos, spreading the glory of your name!"

It'd be like the Imperium of Man, but instead of worshiping a skeleton in a chair we'd be giving praise to a giant crazy robot.

>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.

It's funny you say that, because only somebody dumb enough to enjoy BvS would enjoy Trasnformers 5.

>>93447393
>>93447793
>>93447821

1>2>4>5>3

I legit didn't hate movie 2 and still think it was better than the following 3 sequels. Except for the final battle. That was literally just a half hour of explosions followed by Optimus anti-climactically turning Jetfire (who was one of better bayformers) into a magic mushroom to curbstomp the Fallen.

Do people just love 3 because they hated 2 so much? I can't even remember anything I loved about 3 other than Brains and hobo Megatron. The plot itself was solid; it was just really blandly executed.

I would say 5 was worse than 3 for its poorly paced plot and vaguely motivated villain, but Hopkins and Cogman really carried the film. And the final battle - while still blah - was considerably less all over the place than 2, 3, and the latter part of 4.

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>>93449599

Your gripe has to do with story explanations. The Last Knight is my favorite because it glosses over that shit and does what it does best, robot action.

Why I like it:
>Best robot action scenes
>Most robot action scenes
>Best robot designs (Distinct, recognizable)
>Best pacing (Was interesting the whole time)
>Variety (qt Mexican girl, Nazis, Knights, Cybertron)
>Mark Whalberg is better than Shia Lebouf
>The British Girl is better than Megan Fox
>Quintessa was a great villain
>Bumblebee v Optimus was emotional
>Final Sequence was beautiful, grand, epic
>Did I mention how lovable Izabella is???

>>93450450
>Bumblebee v Optimus was emotional
I disagree, it was too short.

>>93450220
Some of the humor in 3 actually makes me laugh while usually, humor is one of the more cringe worthy elements of these movies for me

I don't know what it is, so many lines in 3 make me laugh.....
>there's two types of people in this world...there's thinkers, there's doers.... there's winners, there's dreamers, and there's buddies
>you have a very trustworthy face, you remind me of like a asian colonel sanders
>i don't care about your exotic milk, I care about respect
>that whole John Malkovich character

Although nothing tops ARE YOU LADIESMAN217

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Is it dare I say TransKino?

>>93434477
Basically. Turning off your brain for most movies is no problem. Turning it off enough to enjoy another Transformers movie? I'm amazed shutting function down that far allows people to breath.

Why does Bumblebee not talk in movies 2-4? He could talk at the end of 1. Because the writers thought they needed to turn their brains off to write the movies.

>>93434568
I'm gonna tweet Trump and see if he can get a law passed where it's legal to shoot pedos on sight. He does that and he's got my vote come 2020.

>>93444717
The stone is the scabbard :^)

I didn't think it was very good. On top of being very directionless and haphazard, it feels very disconnected from the other movies and doesn't make good use of anything in it.

>>93450728

If there's any bright side to The Last Knight, it's that when they finally get back around to having fembots like Slipstream, Bay won't be on deck to fuck them up.

Poor Arcee. May she rest in pieces.

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>>93451028

Bay will be back

He always comes back to fuck the movies up

>>93434477
I never saw these movies, so I didn't realize the shots and action were that dreadful until I looked up some clips.

What the actual fuck? Even lower end B movies do action better than this.

>>93442357
>Bumblebee talks, which is something he could kind of do all along.

Wahlberg fixed his voice earlier in the movie.

>>93451124
Wahlberg gives him the wrong voice and because of that he pulls it out and goes back to radio-speak

>>93449927
I wish I was stupid enough to not notice bad, jarring cuts, shitty angles, weightless characters and flaccid punches.

I'd enjoy way more stuff.

>>93451145
Then Nemesis punches something into its place and his actual voice comes back.

>>93451177
>Then Nemesis punches him in the face and his actual voice comes back

>>93450450
I wanted the little girl to fuck off, she served no real purpose and wasn't interesting or entertaining.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIPNDh2TQOc

Tamera and some guy named Codey Felcher review it!

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>>93451327

Your charisma detection is way off bro. That girl was really charming. I thought she was going to be cringe from the trailers but in the movie, she was so sweet. She is hands down the best human character in the movie, the only thing wrong is they made her disappear after such wonderful bonding scenes with Mark Walberg. I really hope she stars in bigger roles in future installments because she has a bright future ahead of her whether it's in Transformers or another franchise.

>>93451421
She should've gone along. I mean, there's no reason not to.

The black nerd too. He was funny.

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I guess this is the only TF thread besides the storytimes until the next comic comes out.

On topic,
4>5>1>2>3.

>>93434679
>And main character dude...he...did stuff too. I honestly don't remember any of their names.
dont you dare disrespect CADE YAGER

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>>93451560
That's a good Windblade face.

>>93451528
Liking 4 the most eww.
1>3>5>4>2

>>93451528

You have good taste in TF movie rankings.
Mine was: >>93449300
5>1>4>3>2

>>93451421
Nah, man, she was a super dull character, everything involving her in the movie felt like a waste of time.

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Why is Windblade so perfect?

>>93434116
But BvS was shit. So this must be shit also

>>93434116

It was a mediocre movie but I wish that Nitro Zeus didn't die. He was the only entertaining movie original guy so far.

>>93452166
I haven't watched it but I thought he survived with Megatron?

>>93435747

Do you? 'cause you missed his point.

>>93452195

Nah, Bumblebee shot his head off near the end of the film, when the anti-Unicron machine was flying through midair. Damn shame too, he was basically a 1-1 copy of IDW Whirl whenever he had dialogue.

That said, I have no idea which 'cons survived the film, since they all seemed to disappear during the final fight.

>>93452379
Barricade was absent from the final stretch, as usual. Most of Megs' crew gets wrecked iirc.

>>93452166
Having John DiMaggio use his Lobo voice was a highlight.

>>93452443

I know Onslaught gets decapitated by Drift, Nitro Zeus gets headshot by Bee, Dreadbot and Berserker I have no idea what happened to them, and Mohawk was one-shot by Bee. At this rate its going to be the Megatron and Barricade show, and I'm not going to the cinema to maybe catch 5 combined minutes of Barricade somehow escaping death and Megatron menacing folks.

>>93434116
I care because?

>>93452500
Dread and Beserker are still caged up by the end. They didn't get released.

Honestly, Barricade at this point is basically what Screamer was in the original series; space cockroach. He just refuses to die.

>>93434659
Please tell me you're joking

>>93452576
It's been done before.

>>93452562
>They didn't get released

I literally saw one of them being eaten by Grimlock in a trailer

>>93452562

Honestly this bullshit with the bots not getting enough screentime is getting tiring. They've had 5 movies, you'd think we know enough now to maybe delve a bit deeper into Cybertronian stuff without having to be reminded that humans are a thing too.

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>>93452620

They have no choice, if they made the movie entirely nothing but robots with the typical CGI quality the budget would be a 500 million dollar movie, the humans act as filler.

>>93452443
Is Bay even self-aware enough to do stuff like this on purpose? Why the fuck does Barricade disappear before the climax of Every. Single. Fucking. Movie?

>>93452562
Of course not. He was STYLIN.

I want to cuddle the baby dinobots.

>>93452678

I guess the in-universe explanation is that Megatron sees Barricade as a useful covert asset on Earth that he can't just throw away when some big shit's going down, so Megatron tells him to lay low until the next time he makes his move. Real world explanation is that Bay probably legit forgot he existed.

>>93452674

At this point the movies are 70% CGI so I don't see the damn difference.

Speaking of BvS, Grace Randolph was one of the few that loved that movie and she loved Transformers 5 as well. It must be true that anyone who likes BvS will also like TF5.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=elEaZXYp4tQ

>>93452798
Based Grace

>>93452562
>Dread and Beserker are still caged up by the end. They didn't get released.

No Dread was released he was eaten by Grimlock in a blink and you miss it moment

>>93452744

The (((Executives))) must maximize their profits at all costs, how else will they be ale to add that new Super Yacht and private jet to their yearly collection?

>>93452846
Huh. That would probably explain it then.

Was it around the massive traffic collision where Grim belly flops on the guys?

>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.
Oh, great. So we're going to have year long autistic arguments about how there's more to The Last Knight that meets the eye. Well, I certainly look forward to seeing a bunch of anons argue over this.

>>93452912
Well it's being regarded as Kino already so..

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>>93434116

>>93450920
Yeah anon the guy known for being an absolute creep around younger women who said weird shit about his daughter being sexy is totally going to sign that bill. Gr8 thinkin m8

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>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS
So it is a piece of shit directed by an idiot with no respect for the source material who projects hiw own cinematic fetishes into a horrible film?

>>93452674
>They have no choice, if they made the movie entirely nothing but robots with the typical CGI quality the budget would be a 500 million dollar movie, the humans act as filler.

I remember watching Dragonheart as a kid and loving it to fuck. Then I remember rewatching it 20 years later and going "holy fuck the dragon is barely in the movie I remember him having much more screen time".

That's the problem. When you have a CGI character you need to create an ILLUSION that the character is much more in the movie than he actually is.

Have the robot talk in car mode or something I don't know but the problem is that you always go for LONG stretches of time where not only are the robots never to be seen but are completely unimportant.

In TLK for the entire hour you have no robots in it other than brief appearances of Cogman. In the beginning the Autobot vs Decepticon fight lasts less than a MINUTE but then you have a full fucking 5 minute chase of humans running away from HUMAN controlled drones.

That's the kicker. Regardless of how much actual robot screen time there is (tlk has more than both TF 1 & ROTF) because of the editing and prolonged human scenes you are left with a feeling that there weren't many scenes at all.

>>93452941
By who?

>>93452874
>Was it around the massive traffic collision where Grim belly flops on the guys?

No it's after Marky Mark sets up that explosion and then Grimlock comes in and eats Dreadbot and Megatron screams DECEPTICONS RETREAT.

It's SO BADLY edited that unless you knew that scene was coming or saw it before in trailer you would've missed it. The shitty drone church case doesn't help either I barely remember that fight scene because of that overly long shitty chase scene.

>>93453005
/tv/

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Why can't they just hire good writers?

With Bay out of the picture for good there is finally hope but I fear they will continue his shitty trends in next year's movie.

>>93453055
And why would I care about what /tv/ considers "kino" or not? It's a stupid meme.

>>93453069
>Why can't they just hire good writers?

They did. TLK has a pretty damn good script all thing considered.

Bay is the problem because Bay just shoots random crap and then edits it into a movie. He probably didn't even read the script.

There were so many scenes shot that weren't used in the movie and couldn't possibly be used in the movie because of story reason that it just further implies that Bay shoots random crap and then tries to bruteforce what he liked the most into a movie somehow.

>>93453069

I think the writers they have can do well, it's more than likely that Bay is a shit director and ruthlessly cuts between scenes because there's like 5 different plots going on at once and nothing gets a lot of focus. There's a lot of missed opportunities for robot stuff as well, since we have a few WW1 and WW2 bots that turn up and do nothing. When they mentioned that they had a submarine transformer I desperately wanted to see it actually transform but nope, nothing. I liked the robot stuff in the movie but as a whole it was a massive letdown.

It was definitely more coherent than AoE.
In fact everything from the moment they get to London felt like one continuous stream while the first act was full of ten second cut aways.

>>93434903
Holy shit, that's awful.

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LOL the white boy with glasses

>>93453743
>When you're so thirsty for that delicious brown you skip puberty

>>93452678
Barricade was supposed to die in the first movie, but Bay liked him too much and cut the scene so he could come back.

Then production of "Revenge of the Fallen" was a clusterfuck and he ended up being forgotten, so Bay brought him back in "Dark of the Moon" to tie up loose ends.

Then when the Writers Room was figuring out the Transformers Cinematic Universe Bay saw an opportunity to bring him back again as a recurring Con.

And he'll probably be the villain of the "Bumblebee" spin-off.

>>93453131
>muh bay boogeyman

doug pls

>>93453887

Go suck bay's dick on tfw2005 with the rest of Baynigger faggots.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0r7aSC58BK8

@ 3:20 Anthony Hopkins just blurts out that "She's BEAUTIFUL!"

PedoHopkins confirmed?

>>93453743
>fat Mexican kid
>Mexican kid with a football shirt
>nerdy looking black kid
>strong independent Mexican giil that needs no man

>>93453932
He's just a perfectly normal heterosexual man

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>>93447393
1>4>5>2>3

>>93453954

Just like in real life. She has beta orbiters.

>>93434529
Are you implying art in itself isn't subjective to begin with?

>>93454295

He really had to throw a reference to that "Estriol-positive", didn't he? Fucking hell Roberts, stop trying to pander to a base.

>>93435891
>If you can't enjoy it for what it is
Except what it is is poorly made garbage, you fucking apologist.

>>93452958
Spotted the libbie.

>>93435116

Most cape movies are actually coherent, unlike Bayshit.

If we have unicron now will Primus be a thing then?

>>93453887
Dude, if you don't think bad directing can ruin good writing, you don't know shit about how movies work.

>>93434116
I wanted Prime to die. I really liked the idea of him turning into Nemesis Prime, and Bumblebee struggling to come to terms with killing him. Side note, was that fucking Topspin with Simmons?

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I want to marry her so bad

>>93455288
that was. with voice lines, 6 years later.

>>93434116
I liked the parts Ye Olde parts. Why didnt we get a wizards and robots movie? That woulda been fucking awesome

>>93434341
what the fuck are you talking about? The villain is Quintessa and her sidekick, Megatron

>>93434116
Did we ever see Megs again after Optimus kicks him out the window?

Are we absolutely, positively certain Bay is gone from the franchise for good? He's like a fucking cockroach, I don't trust that he's finished until I see him smashed on the concrete.

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>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.

You mean where it's a god-awful train wreck that overgrown man children convince themselves is the new hallmark of cinema?

>>93434477
I can't believe you really typed all this out. Fucking loser

>>93456707

It's a bayformers thread. We're all losers.

>>93456775
Speak for yourself bud

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TMNT is part of the cinematic universe right? April O' Neil randomly shows up after breaking up with Sam Witwicky. She use to be Micaela, but who knows what deception, amnesia brain damage she recieved. Or better yet, she only visited Sam Witwicky's town after the foot attempted to erase her memories because she is always reporting info on them. The spell they casted made her forget who she is, started acting like a popular girl, and she eventually broke up with Sam Witwicky when she remembered who she truly was.

The lore is deep.

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1 - Great
2 - A few good scenes in a steaming pile
3 - Good action covered in humans
4 - Two ok movies covered in Gyyna.
5 - Best TF movie yet, just could have cut out stuff, given the Cons more of a threat presence

Loved seeing more Hound, Cogman was the best, Hopkins was welcomed to the good TF humans, Hot Rod and Megatron were nice to see, totally up to seeing them more.

I really want someone to make a new body for Cogman that turns into a head for a OS version of the body they would have made.

>>93456949
>April eventually spots Sam again on the streets of New York
>He looks like a homeless man now and is screaming "HE WILL NOT DIVIDE US" at a wall for several hours
>April slowly backs away and never sees him again

Say what you will about Bay but atleast he tries to aderess complaints that wont completly overhaul his style

DoTM everyone complains that Prime never mentions Ironhide after he dies

AoE Optimus goes absolutely ballistic after he sees Ratchet desecrated,

AoE everyone complains the movie is way too long, extremly obvious product placement and there felt like there was no connection to the other 3 movies and tries too hard to market to china

TLK has tons of references to every film, tones down the china branding and product placement (Compare the two movies Bud Light scenes)

>>93434341
What MacGuffin do you mean? They use the staff to save the world at the end.

They spend all of ten seconds looking for the book.

1>3>>>>>>>>>>>5>4=2

>>93452474
Nitro Zeus is the main man brother.

>>93454295
I'm happy Fangen and Kaput are becoming friends. I was worried Roberts would kill him off or forget about him.

>>93456409
>and her sidekick, Megatron
considering this is the best Megatron we've had in these movies it really annoyed the crap outta me that he's still just someones lacky and still jobs like a chump to Prime and the other Autobots. I don't see how Megatron was ever a threat of any kind.

>>93458045

And yet he still refuses to give the bots any more than 45 miinutes of combined screentime in a 2 hour movie.

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>isabelamonerThank you for the opportunity to be a part of a kickass movie. Never imagined one of the greatest experiences of my life would involve aliens that occasionally transform into cars. Thank you for letting me be me. For really wanting to make female empowerment a critical part of this film. And last but not least, thank you for allowing me to express my Latin roots throughout. I adore what I've seen of The Last Knight and I think the rest of the world will too. A happy belated birthday to a truly passionate, real human being. @michaelbay

>>93461394
On the one hand, that's cute. On the other hand, every moment with Bay that should be delightful always seems to come off as gross.

>>93454330
They fuck are you talking about? There's different spark types and one out of all them pisses you off? It's like advance alien blood types but with sparks.

>>93458045
>tries too hard to market to china
They should've never gave you chinks money!

>>93434116
Bullshit, saw the movie for myself. I can say it was worse than BvS

>>93461561
Every time people talk about foreign box office, I just think of Joseph from KoTH saying in his inimitable weird voice "And China money!"

The mechanic design of these movies make my stomach turn. Just piles of fucking anthropomorphic scrapyards. I've seen better shit in dA.

>>93446470
>I make movies for teenage boys. Oh dear, what a crime.
As a man who is essentially a perpetual teenage boy could I ask that you please do it better, or get someone with talent to do it.

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>>93454333
Welp. This is gonna start some drama with the Cygate fans.

>>93451092
What the hell is that from?

>>93434116
>BvS
TELL ME BUMBLEBEE, DO YOU BLEED OIL? CHUWILL!

>>93434116
>It's a similar situation to BvS.
So it's shlocky garbage that /co/ntrarians will rabidly defend for no other reason than because everyone else hates it?

>>93462149
Bad Boys II and Pain & Gain are kino.

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>>93434116
this movie pays no respect to the franchise. neither do things make sense anymore. I read the plot on Wikipedia and am very disappointed. do not pay to see this movie. if you do see it, pirate it. do not give Michael Bay money to make more of these garbage films.
/tv/ is either shitposting here or there are paid shills to market the film on this site.

>>93462271
they defend for the (You)s and attention

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>>93434678
what did he mean by this

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>>93435116
>admitting that transformers has no story and shit characters
>wonders why it is hated

>>93462077
This complaint is so old, get a new bit. The robot designs have become way more coherent since the first film

>>93462077

Optimus looks sleek as fuck now. Its called a redesign. Now stop hating for hating sake.

>>93435371
I'm upset the submarine didn't transform.

>>93435266
>this is probably going to make 1 billion hopefully

Did anyone else catch the quick error in the juckyard?
The one where Sqeeks suddenly got his real arm back after dragging the decepticon replacement on the ground moments before then switches back after he adjusts his eye?

>>93436185
cant be real

>>93439009
because that level of immaturity is in all of these films. thanks michael

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>>93462209

From the "Arcee is actually a Trap" comic that was soft-retconned

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You ever see people selling shit with so much sincerity that it is good real and genuine that you wonder if you've been detached from the coils of the mortal realm and have entered a twilight zone where death and time no longer exist but every moment that passes we continue to rot and you stand there as thousands of people fester and decay but continue as if nothing is wrong even though they are just a puddle of decaying juices on the floor and you are on your own in a lake of rotten miasma that is still one hundred percent human, thinking and feeling?

That's what it feels like to see these threads.

>>93463486
I wanna bury my face in her exaust port