Hey Anon We're looking for new writers, so we wanna give

>>93082141
Sure, I'll just use the Chang Tzu version your buddy Grant created. Easy peasy.

>>93082141
But Geoff sir, Egg Fu is in Palmiotti hands now. He's using it as we speak in the Harley Quinn book, how can I use him now?

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>>93082171
Oh come on now. That lame ass excuse for a sentient egg? Please. We need the real deal

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>>93082209
Yikes. You're right. Sorry. I don't read that crap. You know what, I'll have Dr Manhattan fix that

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Now if we're all done trying to weasel our way out of using Egg Fu, can I get your pitch or what

>>93082295
Diana pays visit to the Middle East. they collectively kill themselves because they can't comprehend a woman having that much power. Solves Middle East conflict in a few days.

Egg Fu is dying and requests Diana to be by his side when he passes. He admits he's afraid of dying and asks Diana what lies ahead for him in the afterlife. She gives him a vague, yet comforting message, but this does not satisfy Egg Fu. He curses her with his dying breath as Diana reflects on life, mortality and godhood.

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You're fired
>>93082358

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>>93082552
Hmm, interesting idea, but we really want to push the character from here on out. We think he'll be in Wonder Woman 2. You know how those WB execs can be.

>>93082762
Eh, I wanted to write for Young Animal anyway.

>>93082141
Hm, okay. I'll assume that this is a larger issue than usual or a prestige one-shot or some shit.

Diana is called by her old friend/mentor I Ching to investigate an egg-shaped fortress that sprouted up in the China sea. There have been several terrorist attacks on the main land, and a criminal mastermind named Dán Fu. The Chinese government has tried launching a strike on the fortress to no avail.

Diana discovers that the Dán Fu fortress is made up of some sort of magic based metal, which makes Wondy think that only she can stop the terrorist attacks and destroy the fortress. She makes her way in using her magical weapons and discovers that the fortress is actually a high-tech shrine to Caishen, the Chinese god of wealth. It was erected by none other than I Ching, who has assumed the name of Dán Fu as an alias. He aims to destroy the one person who could defeat him and destroy the remaining pantheons so that the Chinese gods can reign supreme and bring about what I Ching sees as a utopia for mankind.

Dán is Chinese for 'egg' by the way.

Um, Egg Fu hatches into a giant bird monster and Wonder Woman fights it over a city?

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>>93082975
So you want to take Egg Fu, and make him not an egg

I'm sorry, but we at DC are really set on ensuring that Egg Fu remains true to his origins. He needs to be the egg, otherwise, no book

>>93083314
>Literally a giant techno-fortress shaped like an egg with a classic obscure Wonder Woman character behind it all and a whole new pantheon for maximum spin-off appeal
Geoff would love that idea and you know it.

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>>93083340
Look man, I might buy it if that pantheon were also eggs, but otherwise, I don't know how you can expect me to support that.

>>93083265
Oh and maybe the bird monster lays an egg at the end as a way to keep a new Egg Fu around plus the bird monster, Bird Fu.

Bad Egg/Good Egg

Egg Foo's twin, EGG FUNG wants to go straight, and is escorted on a flight with STEVE TREVOR to headquarters of whatever government agency works best for movie continuity.

The plane is attacked by UNKNOWN ASSAILANTS and goes down ovre some burma expy dictatorship.

WONDER WOMAN is dispatched to help, but because of diplomatic issues with China, they want her to go with KENAN KONG to make sure China's interests are represented.

Generic apocalypse now jungle montage with two set action pieces ensue.

GENERIC EVIL DICTATOR is an obsessed foodie, forces WONDER WOMAN and NEW SUPER MAN to battle in an iron chef style cooking show. Set up a joke or two about cooking being womans work. EGG FOO is revealed as the mastermind who has a plot to use salmonella based bioweapons on tropical birds to give them bird flu.

End on the usual big action sequence.

>>93082224
Sure thing.

The original Egg Fu has been peacefully living in his home village for the past several decades. However, increasing urbanization of China is causing his neighbors and loved ones to be pressured out of their homes so the government can build more condos nobody can afford.

Egg Fu returns to crime by assembling a militia of disenfranchised chinese men who have also been ousted from their ancestral lands by urbanization, and forms an urban terrorist group who are fighting back.

Wonder Woman on a diplomatic mission to China is embroiled in this while she's being taken to see the strides Chinese culture has made in valuing girl and boy children equally.

Wonder Woman gets raped. Egg Fu gets raped. Everyone gets raped. Rape is everywhere. Rape.

>>93083839
Go back to Gotham, Commissioner.

I liked the idea of Byrne's 19th century super-computer until he just explained it was New Gods fuckery, but that wasn't really a villain.

>>93082141
>Geoff Johns is now the Kevin Feige of the DCU and the DCEU and the DCTVerse
Do you think this is a good thing? Or is he overextending himself? At least the good thing is that he's no Bendis about this and just copies whatever's on the screens

>>93083731
Would read/10

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>>93083869

Alright Geoff, I got it, but we're going to have to do some retconning and rebuilding, thanks to Dr. Manhattan.

As you know, Superman has Mr. Mxyzptlk, Batman has Bat-Mite, but Wonder Woman, for being a huge part of DC and a member of DC's Trinity, never had a 5th Dimension nemesis. Hell, even Aquaman had one, so we change Egg-Fu into a 5th Dimension Imp and boom, silver age shenanigans involving Wonder Woman.

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Make Egg Fu female. Clazy Amelicans will fall for it because everyone loves a good stronk female character.

>>93082141
he controls a secret crime bent on stealing all the gods artifacts and backwards engerning the property for mass market weapon in the dc universe including Diana's lasso, he succeeds in getting it so Diana has to retrieve it fighting her way through genetic animal god creations, facing a god like egg fu

>>93086390
I would unironically like to see a female Egg Fu. If only to see how quickly /co/ would waifu an offensive Chinese stereotype.

>>93086390
Would fertilize/10

>>93082141
Hey Johns! How about we retell a silver age story in six issues but with more edge and more forced feels?