How's Your Webcomic? #343

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Scrub Authors GOODIE Bag
Here’s a short list of sites that any new webcomic artist or writer will find handy:
>*-Struggling to find that perfect FONT? Create your own using this link;
http://www.myscriptfont.com/

>*-Don’t forget to brush up on that ANATOMY:
http://artists.pixelovely.com/practice-tools/figure-drawing/
http://www.quickposes.com/pages/timed

>*-What’s a list without some reference STOCK IMAGES?
People: http://senshistock.deviantart.com/gallery/
Scenery: http://www.shutterstock.com/

>*-Here's a big fat compilation of CHARACTER DESIGN REFERENCE:
http://www.pinterest.com/characterdesigh/ (surprisingly not a typo)

>Links to get a rough WEBSITE started up:
Easy to use tumblr webcomic theme: https://www.tumblr.com/theme/39018
Do’s and Don’ts for starting a site: http://pastebin.com/kNR2W5mV
>Contact sheet if anyone wants to put information down, like their site and webcomic:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1uwfOSHXfrgvcf--PkPz9jXL6p5RqIsrYvXYwgQpgT3k/edit#

>DISCORD CHAT going on,
Ask for an invite in the thread.

>Wise words from John Cleese:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5xPvvPTQaMI [Embed]

>Invisible Ink:
http://courses.cs.washington.edu/courses/cse456/07su/administrative/invisible_ink_part_1.pdf
http://courses.cs.washington.edu/courses/cse456/07su/administrative/invisible_ink_part_2.pdf
http://courses.cs.washington.edu/courses/cse456/07su/administrative/invisible_ink_part_3.pdf

>Paper Wings
http://chrisoatley.com/category/podcasts/
https://web.archive.org/web/20140625035030/http://paperwingspodcast.com/

>Fonts for your webcomic on Blambot:
http://www.blambot.com/

>Writing Resources:
http://www.cienciasecognicao.org/rotas/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/Robert-McKee-Story.pdf

>Guide to promoting your comic:
http://miss-melee.tumblr.com/post/143483233951/

>Comics for makin' comics!
https://www.mediafire.com/folder/9pf1nwwa92lbp/Comics_for_making_Comics

https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=how+to+draw+comics

I'm trying to outline my comic, but I'm worried that I'm getting a little too detailed with it. At the rate this is going, I'll never even get around to scripting the actual pages.

I've read through dozens of how-to articles for outlining, but now I wanna hear /co/'s opinions.
What do you include in the outline for your comics?

>>89360177
I include every event in the story as long as they are either essential to the plot or the characterization. Then I fill in the bits while creating.

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http://abnor.com.br/?lang=en

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Worked a few hours last night and this morning polishing the layouts from last time.

I usually am well with compositions but never did well with dialogue placement.

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It's a humiliating story that I hoped never to tell... Well pull up a chair!

>>89360177
If reading articles and stuff isn't doing it for you, just get head long into it, and figure it out while you're doing it. It's not the best way to make it work, but you'll hate the early stuff later in life anyway, might as well just dive in.

>>89312316
Yo, it's me again. Added a new page if you feel like giving feedback again.
Maybe if it's passable enough, I can keep going, or start colouring this, I dunno. Sorry for being over reliant with this, but I seriously don't have any confidence.

http://imgur.com/a/kt3s7

I promise to focus on my actual comic this week, tho, for real.

I feel like I should repost since I was at the tail end of the last thread, but I couldn't post this one in the first place. I mean I think. It's hard to tell how mildly-nsfw /co/ mods are going to tolerate in a given day. Doesn't help if it's furryesque aliens.
>>89360891
typo in panel 6, should be he is the ONE who should be in fear
also I goddamn love this comic. Tadeu is such a bro. I love when they defeat things with the power of rules. and I love the symmetry of how they were making fun of each other at the beginning of this story and now it's praise time.
>>89360992
is there a way to separate these out by story? It's like six different comics sharing one navigation
>>89361379
tried this on two computers, it won't let me scroll past the top. anyone else having that problem? it just jumps back to the top every time

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>>89361453
Weird, I can see it with my logged account, but one another browser, it does that.

Anyway, here's the link for the single image:

http://imgur.com/bQC6n6e

Also, since you're here, lemme give a glimpse of my other side work. I wanted this revealed once it's finished, but w/e.

>>89361529
Bro you're going to overload my happy. i'm going to break my face from smiling this much

also that page is hot. You don't see the pretending-to-be-asleep thing very often with someone trying to seduce someone else that they're already kind of dominating.
yeah I looked it up and this is just a glitch imgur has periodically. they'll fix it, they did so 10 months ago.

>>89360891
This is really good

run from this place

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I think this thing is finally ready for animation. I'm glad to finally be done drawing cables.

>>89362039
I see you like invader zim, I also like invader zim.

Good work on the detail tho brah.

>>89360177
practice outlining by taking your favorite movie and listing each scene and what happens in it

It also helps if you're writing a story more about the characters than explaining everything in your world and how it works

>>89361453
Seems like a wise idea, I'll work on making an archive that has just the individual stories in it.

The dewd is finally gone,
Why did you guys tolerate him so fucking long??

>>89362993
You dare speak his name?!? Why the fuck are you trying to summon him from /v/ or wherever the fuck he's sperging at??

>>89362993
he's not gone, he just hasn't posted yet

I came into a little cash to put into some comics, do we have a master list of /hyw/ posters looking for work/do commissions?

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>>89360054
new sketch of one of my fates chaos characters

>>89363396
it doesn't come up often enough, but stick around. You're willing to pay, so that puts you at the top of the list.

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>>89363449

woops, drew human ears on her, my bad, fixed it

WOAH what's up with all this ANIME TRASH lmao

>>89363396
What style of art are you looking for? We have plenty of regulars here and I feel like all of us are probably open to commission.

>>89361453
>typo in panel 6, should be he is the ONE who should be in fear

Thanks, man, I will fix it right away. Be sure to honor your contracts.

>>89361653

Thank you, but aren't we supposed to bail on these threads only after we make it?

>>89365027
individual commissions for sure, but not everyone wants to commit to doing full comics for someone else

>>89365094
im sure theres a few in these threads who are open to that. what type of comic is it though. nobody is going to apply for a job they know nothing about

>>89362039
This is looking great so far, it's always a pleasure to see you around.

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>>89362993
On Twitter it looked like he was trying to find a new site

>>89366651
10/10

>>89366707
Who would want him though?

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Not sure about the framing on the last page of my comics. The girl should be falling down softly. Should I add another frame with her spinning a bit to link frame 1 and 2 ? Basically she falls into the purgatory and that dude welcomes her of sorts

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>>89366651
Hot.

So how does /hyw/ feel about webcomics that inserts sex into their works for views?

>>89366923
I've been diggin through most of his sites,
and he seems to talk a lotta shit about other OCs.
Which, I think is strange considering his own art quality.

>>89366995
I did this for the launch of my comic, and boy it attracted people.
Can't say I'm sorry for it, but man, did it bought its own burden afterwards.

>>89366707
I will never understand people obsessing this hard. I don't follow anyone's social media, least of all people I hate so much that I derail every thread I'm in to bitch about him

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>>89367130
What kind of burdens? Like guys wanting more porn or weirder fetishes being represented?

>>89366995
don't do it for views
do it because it's beautiful
include beauty because it's nice
make your comic nice for views

>>89367990
More like the former for starters, but then, I felt it became what represented my work the most, and that's for sure something I wasn't aiming for, so I started to do the soft censor by chapter 3, using speech bubbles and whatnot to reduce that impression.

That's what kinda motivated me to do the porn spin-off as well, so I can split the waters while giving everyone the same.

>>89368077
I do kinda understand not wanting it to dominate and represent the work
if I draw people fucking it's one panel of one person on top of another and the punchline is someone walked in on them or something.
or if there's just a dildo sticking out of someone's ass, it's just... yknow, between their legs. it doesn't have to be a grotesque closeup

>>89360955
I think you did pretty well with the dialogue, less is more in these serious types of pages. More of it would make it look like those wacky marvel comic pages.
Also how long does it take you to do one of these? I feel like page two came out a month ago. I hope I'm wrong.

>>89368314
Thanks. Yes was always told not to be wordy but still seem believable and natural when people speak. So I think of if I'm in those situations and think of the first thing out of my head naturally and work around that.

Honestly, It goes back and forth. Some panels would take me a while, especially when I'm not feeling it, other times in other panels I get them done quickly especially when completely redoing them.

Guess it depends on mood. That or not being busy with work, freelance, and spending time with the fiance. Had finally finished an animated short for the advertising dept in the company I work for.

>>89369026
>animated short
Care to share? Whoa, that rhymed.

>>89368314
Oh, and page two I posted 9 days ago, so I'm definitely doing much better than before haha.

>>89369245
I guess it's just me then. With all the finals, days seem to last like weeks.

>>89369123

https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B-u8SocsU28YSW43eVlLYnFtejA/view?usp=sharing

I honestly think it's shit, but the guy wanted it to be sketchy like my test animation roughs so I said sure. The only parts I thought were good were the first 7 seconds.

Am trying to upload it online. Didn't ask him yet for permission so I doubt he'd say no. Plus I have no following on social media, so whatever.

>>89370372
how can you possibly think this is shit? this is professional animation.

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>>89370477
Oh, well thank you for thinking so. But I just know I could do it much better; would've taken me much longer to do. And hated the rhino running animations, the human running animation looks stiff with his lower torso looking so stationary.

I actually liked pic related much more, and even then I see so many mistakes. I dunno, guess just a self-confidence thing when it comes to my craft.

>>89370633
maybe it's the complete lack of anything remotely like this on tv anymore.

>>89370981
I guess. And I can see why not many companies want to do much traditional animation anymore. It's hard and very time consuming. Crazy how the anime industry does it.

>>89371018
slave labor can build pyramids and make a country rich on cotton and tobacco crops, but real innovation is when you build a machine that can do it even better
i blame smartphones. technology has been lagging, even going backwards, over the last decade.. when we should have fantastic AI by now, that can intelligently inbetween drawings.

bump for boobies

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I leave here for 4 days and i'm 11 pages into (The sketches i mean...) the comic.

>I feel ashamed coming here, but it's nice to leave a little update for at least once in a while right?

>>89372529
So expressive!

>>89363492
>>89365094

Not entirely sure, I have a lot of projects that I want to get proof of concepts together for, usually in the form of 5 page stories, but I match the project to the person's style, so it is ncie to have a frame of reference.

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Finished my first short comic. 3 Pages.

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>>89373464

>>89373464
good writin'
>>89373495
hmm, kinda using the same pun twice in a row. I would have gone with something like "i think we both know where this is heading" or change the first instance to "I'm headin' you off at the pass" or something.

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>>89373495

Trying to teach myself to do short, simple narratives. Concurrently, I was also trying to improve my line work by forcing myself to only use black and white and not grey tone the shit out of everything.

It mostly came out the way I imagined. Naturally 10 seconds after finishing I thought of a hundred ways it could have been better.

>>89373464
>>89373495
>>89373535

This is good stuff, got any websites with more of your work?

>>89373532

Shit, you're right. I didn't even see that... these pages were worked on weeks apart.

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>>89373548
All of them. (No, not really)

http://bridgefirecomics.deviantart.com/
https://twitter.com/bridgefirecomix
http://bridgefirepictures.tumblr.com/

Thinking about doing something on Inspector Gadget next...

>>89373564
yep I've done that. fuck just today I was doing parody lyrics and I used the same word one word apart in one line. thank god youtube lets you edit that shit now

>>89373535
That's some nice swirling horror, but I gotta say... those are some weak sandworms compared to the original. Everything else is great.

>>89373532
This is going to torture me now.

The line works great in both situations, so I feel like it's a matter of coming up with a better line for one or the other...

Right now I'm toying with "Don't MIND me" for page 2...

Page 3 all I got are the ingredients for a lewd joke about keeping his foot out of his mouth or something? Fuck... puns are hard when you're trying to be intentional about it...

>>89373636
oh my god that is an incredibly cute style for IG. do it. do the fuck out of it. I never realized how much I need this.
I can't think of what the story would even be or what the tone could possibly be but this needs to happen

>>89373636

Followed you on twitter and all tha jazz. Great work. You could easily do some IG 4komas in that style. That'd be fresh.

>>89373837
Page 3 is fine, doesn't need more jokes.
I think the second page has the weaker one, since he's not really getting ahead of himself in any appreciable way, he's just goofing around.
he could say "you don't have to bite my head off" or "I'll head back up in a sec"

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>>89373864
>>89373890

I was thinking something relatively light somewhere between Akira Toriyama and Osamu Tezuka. 3-5 pages.

The hard part is trying NOT to turn it into a story.

>>89373977
Yeah, it works better on page 3. I changed it to "Don't mind me" in lieu of a better idea that might strike me later in the middle of the night.

>>89374062
that's exactly the feel I got. after all the tezuka influences in IG are so obvious.. along with monkey punch. and I can see some toriyama in your Penny. I'm gonna love this.
>>89374089
wait, -what- works better on page 3?
as for the lap thing, I feel like I still need to keep suggesting. It's a good exercise. but the only ones I can think of are kind of a stretch or not nearly beetlejuicy enough
>worried I'll kopf a feel?
>is my dome too close to home?
>what am I gonna do, bite your kneecaps off?
>but your thighs make such nice earmuffs, and speaking of m-
and then she cuts him off.

>>89374246
The original line works better on page 2 (I mis-typed before.) Originally he was "ahead" of her line of thought on page 1 but on page 2 he is literally getting ahead of himself without his head. I think that's better.

I just realized I used "mind" already in an earlier line of dialogue so I'll have to change it.

Could be something as simple as "Heads Up"

For 2 I was thinking something along the lines of "Better a thigh than a foot..." which makes no sense, but I feel like there's some kind of sex pun there. I"m just not seeing it right.

>>89373636
And followed. Keep it up.

>>89374344
aww I liked it better in page 1, but ok..
in that case, the replacement in page 1 will be something where he transitions into explaining that it's not what she thinks, but instead he plans to do the haunting.. so .. uh..
>>89374461
you know what? actually that works. I've exercised my pun muscles enough for one night, you clearly know what you're doing

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The catfolk of Singapurr are but one of many forms of Sapient to make their way to Palea after the rise of the Magic Empire. Catfolk are taught music from a young age, and many attempt to get jobs in the business. Unfortunately, they’re really weird looking and make everyone uncomfortable, so most get jobs as waitresses in seedy bars before realizing they’re never going to make it big. With no local industry, a constant influx of immigrants with useless skills, and the constant discomfort of a being a furry creature living in a desert environment, not everybody wants to be a cat.

SaffronComic.com

>>89366651

Fucking incredible

>>89374519
>human-eared cats
I get it, reverse of nekomimi catgirls. That's pretty clever but gotta agree, weirdlookin. Enough to hurt one's musical career for sure.
That punchline is great

>>89374519
>the constant discomfort of a being a furry creature living in a desert environment
I take it they aren't as desert-designed as housecats, sandcats, etc then. More like tigers?

>>89374786

Even a housecat starts getting into trouble at 90+ degrees.

These guys were very nearly Abyssyrian refugees, which would be a great pun if "Abyssinian" were a more well-known breed. Alas.

I kept trying to fit in a joke about how some of the cats tried shaving themselves to beat the heat but look like those wrinky sphinx cats and are even weirder-looking and less employable shaven, but I couldn't get the concept into a good joke. I might rewrite the lore post to fit it in, I had some trouble with this one.

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Finished her Model sheet, moving on to bara dinosaur man and pink megaman tomorrow.

How to do an opening narration?what is the basic rule? what to tell? what not to tell?

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I'm super stressed and depressed tonight, /hyw/. Post something to cheer me up.

>>89378310
I doubt this was meant to be in reply to me but it cheered me up a bit anyway. Thanks, anon.

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>>89378346

Are there any guides that are strictly focused on having good pacing and story flow? I never seem to find shit like that, just general umbrella guides that briefly mention pacing and flow to the extent of "make sur dey gud" without going into more detail.


>>89378009
I'm interested in this as well.

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>>89374519
Is that character based on this joke?

>>89378780
most likely, that guy is so unoriginal in all his stories

>>89374499
Please put your trip back on coldfusion.

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Someone last thread said the proportions in one of these poses was messed up. They were correct and I wasn't measuring things properly, so here's a corrected version.

>>89380933
Her torso seems really short compared to her legs

>>89380933
You don't draw alot of characters naked do you... you tend to draw them with clothes first (which is fine), but it leads to this problem as seen with the underwear model of the character.

Have you noticed in your dynamic poses her torso is slightly longer?

And I have a feeling she might not be the only character that suffers from a slight anatomical problem.

I want you to go and search the major difference in men and women, from head shape, torso proportions to foot size.

It'll help you understand how to make an appropriate measurement for your character.

Also final opinion to you if she sparkles like that in battle, she's gonna die first by every archer or long ranged fighter on the battlefield... to bad :^) but hell prove me wrong.

Now here's the good news your characters torso isn't impossible people do look like that believe me... so she's possible if you wanna keep her that way, but chances are she can't bend over or sit down without stumbling a bit, she'd run quite awkward but her leg size would help her build some serious speed.

Peter Griffin would also bone here, good chose :^).

Good Luck.

>>89375217
oh yeah they look like nutsacks

>>89378310
oh my god, the skulls

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>>89380933

she got thighs up to her armpits mang

>>89384643
actually he did fix the problem earlier where her elbows were at her waist (I'm the one that pointed that out). they are now at the bottom of her ribcage where they belong. unfortunately the result still doesnt look very good. It makes me want to select everything from navel level up and just stretch it

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>>89380933
>>89384643

keep at it, you have a lot of potential and i'd like to see you continue to grow in your ability

I'm working on a thing with a team of superheroes/ magical girls and I'm stuck on themeing.
Red is rock
Orange is hip hop
Yellow is classical
Green is the problem
Blue is jazz
Indigo is electronic
Violet is a plot point

What the fuck do I make green? Funk?

>>89384949
I'd go for the lowest hanging fruit and say Reggae, but then again. It's too obvious

>>89384949
make green basic bitch pop.

>>89384949
why are you going with a music theme if i might ask?

>>89384740
I still say this model has the pelves way too long. Of course people do vary.
I'm also pretty sure JNelson is trying to intentionally play with stylization, so it's more a question of aesthetics than correct or incorrect.. and this lady looks a little bad in her skivvies.

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>>89383056
>>89384643
>>89384668
>>89384740
>>89385212

How's this? I checked my model sheet and realized there were a bunch of inconsistencies. Nadil is supposed to have long legs and a short torso, but I think the problem there is I drew her too off-model by accident.

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>>89385387
ok wait I revised it one more time

>>89385774
I mean... the dynamic ones look the best. the standing straight ones all look TOO short-torso'd. Like I love short-torso characters, especially when anime does it, but it also helps if there's more hourglassing to that torso

>>89378780
cute AF

>>89385774
You may have "revised" it but I see nothing changed... well she looks ok in clothes (since they hide the inconsistency) so its up to you take that risk.

Shes still gonna die shining like that...

>>89385201
I like spending Time thinking about what music genres connect to what other ones and how that would translate into characters.

For instance I was thinking about wether or not metal should be a character until I realized metal should be a super form for rock. Translating inspirational relationships into characters amused me enough to write something around it.

ive been thinking of starting a web comic.

The idea I have is to set it in a fantasy setting.
the way magic works in this world is that certain spirits connect to individuals of their choosing. sorta like the green lantern core.

individuals that can do magic are uncommon, they are treated differently in various areas.

The protagonist is a librarian who was chosen by a spirit of wisdom. The powers he receives give him power over water. He then decides that with his new power she can travel the world and track down legendary lost books.

I'm afraid it might be generic, that's why the character wants to track down lost books. I thought it might be a more original character.

>>89386774
That's pretty cool. I love themes like that
make the green uh... tribal / folk / south american
>>89386918
I dig it. No one part is unique, but the whole is. Actually I can't remember the last time anything made magic powers something bestowed by choice like that, so that's new. I would watch the hell out of waterbending bibliophile librarian.

>>89386117
I changed the middle left pose. The belly button/waist was moved down and the knees were altered slightly. Like I said I got it off-model that time so I had to correct it some more. And I do draw the characters first and then draw clothes on top of them, in case you're wondering. I just messed that one up a lot where she ain't wearing stuff.

>>89387059
thanks.
I think that sometimes when you make something you can too easily see your own influences.

>>89363686
you mentioned threads back about getting 2k/month for your comic
explain?

>>89366707
havent been here for a bit, what made him quit hyw?

>>89387772
Kept posting his shit art and never took any critiques.

>>89385774
If you're still at that school, take Dove's anatomy class.One of the best things I ever did for my skills.

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>>89387734

well, my comics are free and i do it for fun and never really promote them or try to make any money off of them, but my next one i will by submitting it exclusively to lineweb toons when ive got a few chapters done for a chance to get 2000 dollars a month for having an exclusive web comic on there you can google it your self to find out more if you really want to last time i checked its still the way it works there

i havent released any pages of FATES CHAOS to the internet yet and when i do its only going to be on linewebtoons but maybe i will post a single panel here or something to promote it and if i get banned for that then fuck this place i will just promote it on twitter and youtube and on my deviantart and maybe even make a tumblr to promote it i dont know yet

check out this sweet new sketch of the main character i just did in a cool cartoon style ive been playing around with! i made it this mourning lol

>>89366707
This pathetic idiot will never find the community he's looking for. He's too proud to mingle with retards (note how he never engages with Coldfusion), and too garbage and mentally impaired to get actual praise from non-retards.

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thoughts on my kangaroo OC?

>>89388359
can't believe I fell for this last time

>>89388069
Or maybe he just politely left since you asked him to. I've been that guy before, that gets shat on everyone for no reason but eventually realizes the nice thing to do is stop bothering people.

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>>89360061
anon wanna shoot me a discord link?
im ready this time

What do you guys do when you're late on an update on a dedicated day?

Is there etiquette or anything from the artist that you appreciate when there's no update on one that you read?

>>89388405
>shat on everyone for no reason
>no reason
lmao

>realizes the nice thing to do is stop bothering people.
Incredible, you actually make it sound like this retard gives a fuck about anyone but himself. If he did he'd have stopped a long time ago

>>89388359
keep your memes to yourself /ic/

>>89388381
>>89388487
what's the meme here

https://discord.gg/vXuCU

>>89388505

>>89388466

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>>89388503

>>>2822985
it's from proko's livestream on "drawing from imagination"
pic related

>>89388599
this is worse than /hyw/

>>89388470
If it's just a day I don't even care, I'd rather they work on the comic than work on a little 'sorry i'm late' scribble, but those are okay too I guess

>>89388359
>someone who went to art school and has been drawing for close to 20 years draws like this
Is there any hope for the rest of you?

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>>89388599
>the video is STILL unlisted
will proko ever recover?

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More color model sheets

>>89390201
love dem robo legs
is that to scale?

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>>89390977
Yes.

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I'm drawing and redrawing.

>>89391302
Nice robot girl.

>>89391828
>2017
>traditional media
getting left behind

http://imgur.com/a/0cb7v

Current WIP. I'm planing on re working the hair details tomorrow when I get back home, but I have to admit how baffling is for me to get this done at a moderate speed, but when I want to do my actual comic, nothing comes out.

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i did it anyway, not that I don't value the warnings of not doing it.

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i wil post this because it´s the proper thread to do it.

>>89391828
face made of bricks is pretty cool

>>89392268
I don't see why this is that different from your regular comic.
>>89392687
you madman. you did what?

>>89392935
Started remaking my first couple dozen pages

>>89392767
aztastic!
>>89392809
shit dude this is beautiful.
>>89392884
yeah I'm digging this.
>>89392943
huh, didn't see this swerve coming.
>>89392979
all this connected cultural history stuff.. it's gargoylesworthy

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>>89393032
Thanks Man, it´s a mexican webcomic called Nahualo, you can check it in Facebook by searching Nahulo

>>89393021
ahhh
well you know, I usually advise against that, but for you... for you maybe it's okay

>>89393154
I think it's okay for anyone to remake pages done in flash

>>89392687
still looks like shit, get a hobby that your kid can look up to.

>my dad draws these comics about some rocks
>cool can I see?
>n-nah, they're super lame, hey wanna smoke some weed instead?

>>89392935
I don't think it is. But when I sit in front of a blank page thinking "I gotta do a new strip" Nothing comes. I even know how to continue because I have the layout of events, but I still can't get to do anything about it.

>>89393740
so it's the story that's different, to you?

>>89394120
I think I'm worn out. I think I just can't stomach to work on it anymore, but I'm 20 strips or so to finish it, and it feels like like the biggest chore,I can't wait to finish it.
Unrelated, but I want this other comic done first so I can have it out there before closing shop.

>>89366982
I think a little panel in between with her spinning would be good

>>89378009
>>89378358
I've heard advice that was something like, treat it like you're unfolding a mystery, only reveal the most obvious and relevant pieces at first, and then reveal more as they become important. You're slowly digging in to the delicious nougatey center of secrets.

>>89394430
if you feel that bad, I think any and all of your fans will understand if you just stop. we don't want you to be worn out and angry at your art.

What are good ways to portray crying and sobbing in text?

Oddly enough I can't think of any particularly good examples I've seen, and when I try to sound it out more directly/literally to text, it just seems like it would use the same kind of writing as laughter.

And of course "(Sob, sob!)" is fucking stupid, especially for a dramatic scene.

>>89397400
I'd say limit onomatopoeia to the occasional "sniff" and show the crying though stuttering words and long pauses between words/phrases when the character is choked up.
You could also just show an image of the character crying, since you're working in a visual medium. Unless you specifically can't show the character crying for some reason, I feel just letting the images do the talking would be most effective.

>>89397400
that's a tough one. the sounds of sobbing to me are like 'hoo',hoo'' and 'uh uh uh uh' which doesn't look right at all on paper. like, the terminal consonant is a glottal stop and the vowel is usually like in 'hook' or 'mm'

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>>89397595
>>89397595
>I'd say limit onomatopoeia to the occasional "sniff" and show the crying though stuttering words and long pauses between words/phrases when the character is choked up.
What if we're talking like uncontrollable sobbing, though? The kind that you can't just hold back, the kind where a person loses control of their voice completely and screams and cries out as they sob? Particularly in young characters like children.

>Unless you specifically can't show the character crying for some reason
Well there can definitely be reasons. A character hidden for the sake of setting the scene, or because they're burying their face in their hands or someone else's shoulder.
When a person cries, it's a very audible experience. When people cry it's about more than tears and a red face, they cry out, they scream, they sob, they sniff and stutter like you said.
I'm surprised I've never seen people try to portray things in a more detailed manner than imagery or (sniffle)s and (sob)s.

>I feel just letting the images do the talking would be most effective.
One gets a lot of this kind of advice working in comics but it can get kind of old. While yes showing and not telling is important, there is still more to life than vision, and although comics are silent, it still feels like people should strive to portray different things in new and different ways, rather than always relying on either exposition or speechless images.

>>89397735
>One gets a lot of this kind of advice working in comics but it can get kind of old. While yes showing and not telling is important, there is still more to life than vision, and although comics are silent, it still feels like people should strive to portray different things in new and different ways, rather than always relying on either exposition or speechless images.

I would just show them without any words and sounds IF it would enhance the situation, if there's dialog inbetween I'd write the dialog as if the person was shouting, it really is tough to show people crying in comics

>>89397892
>it really is tough to show people crying in comics
Well at least I know it's not just me.

>>89397735
i mean you can't go wrong with 'waa' and honestly hawwww if you held the w long enough wouldn't sound like laughter anymore

maybe you should check out other languages' onomatopoeiae for crying, there might be a great one we haven't thought of. or at least it'd be less cringey than 'sob'

Hey HYWG, I've got a fully completed comic done, was hoping to get some feedback if it's not too much trouble.
>>89398491

quick question, sorry if this has been answered before, but i feel this is a good place to ask
if i want to do pornographic comics, can i use pretty much any web host, or are there certain ones that wont host websites like that?

>>89399667
I recommend you to use Tumblr or you host your own.
Most comics hosting sites have a "mature" option, but they're still not suited for porn.
Erotic probably, but explicit porn is kinda tough.
Some people censor their comic on tapastic or some other place, then put the full one on Patreon or someplace like that.
If you're already have an audience, that would be a safe gamble.

>>89399878
thank you, but i mean in regards to self-hosting, as in having my own domain

>>89399917
Some websites won't allow it but I couldn't tell you specifically which. I've heard of people having to look around.

>>89400037
>websites
webhosts, whatever.

>>89400037
i'm currently considering bluehost, if anyone has had experience with them

>>89400056
https://my.bluehost.com/hosting/help/234

That's what I use but my site isn't porn.

>>89400081
well that settles it, i'll have to look for a host elsewhere

>>89400127
You can look for a tutorial to make tumblr suitable for webcomic hosting and you can post all the smut you want.

>>89400151
i'd personally prefer to have my own domain instead of using tumblr, as wordpress suits my needs better

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last week's Dreamrise page. let me know what you think.

where is everyone posting their shit?

ive got a website, twitter, and tapastic. thinking of going to line but not sure if it would be worth the effort of cropping images to fit, making thumbnails, etc.

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>>89400861
>where is everyone posting their shit?
in the trash can

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Could I get some feedback on this? Whipped it up as a sort of beta design for a species of giant big dumb fish that eat boats. It has slight significance to the story, so I wanted to hear people's thoughts.

I'd also appreciate any feedback on the coloring, textures, lineart. My comic is supposed to be told as a legend, so I want the textures and the brush strokes to convey that, like paints on a wall

>>89401547
Yeah, Tumblr is where most people are posting.

>>89401586
What the fuck are you doing here with talent like that?
Holy shit.

>>89397400
make up your own by listening to what you sound like (or what others sound like). i'm a little bitch, so i cry fairly often. and it sounds something like "buh, wuhh, ghh, nghh" very sniffly and nasly.

some people howl: "owoooo, ohhhh, uuuhhaaaah"
some people whimper: "uhuhu, uhhh, uwwahh"
some people screech- ect ect you get the point

>>89401604
i wanna post mine through tumblr, but it's so hard to integrate ads through the layouts provided (or at all. tumblr's coding is not tweak-friendly)

>>89401771
thanks anon, you're too kind

for what it's worth, these threads have been extremely helpful when I ask for feedback, so a lot of my improvement is due to them

>>89387898
you really need pose exercises

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74HR59yFZ7Y

>>89387898
I ain't going to lie, I fapped to thi. Good work man.

>>89366707
Why are you stalking him tho?

>>89400424
dont use godaddy

>>89400450
this is colorful and pretty. what's it about?
>>89400861
what in god's name is line? use real websites, not twitter and tapastic or things meant for phones. most of us use a site that offers webcomic hosting

>>89401586
it definitely looks like a dumb fish, though its anatomy baffles me a bit. is the rest of it behind that colorful shape?
oh wait, I see that's like... crazy symbolic water. Well here's the thing, the fish has a fishy lip mouth so it would have to be EXTRA huge to be able to eat boats, and I don't even see teeth. meanwhile its body is half as thick as its head, unlike most fish, so it would have to be twice as big again to be able to eat boats.

>>89404228

Probably the same reason people stalk Chris Chan, or Andrew Dobson.

Its just so bad that they can't look away.

>>89400450
Your colors and panels throughout the comic are so nice. It's neat seeing what you're improving at when starting from the beginning.

Looking forward to seeing what happens.

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I got a new brush. I had no idea how fucked the old one was. I also switched from higgens to universal ink.

>>89400450
Really dig the colors, but it looks good all around.

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>>89402518
bro

>>89406238
Line webtoons, grandpa

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Mine's a simple one, nothing too fancy, I wanna work on the humor, make it funnier with the writing and expressions. Started not too long ago.

>>89408646
cute. I like the variation on 'hey look over there' with something that, potentially, indicates something about her personality... like, that she's a clean freak

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>>89387898

this is feras little sister fairune stardust, say something nice about her!

>>89404211
you... did what???? wow anon, i dont know what to say, whatever floats your boat i guess

Question,

Would anyone be interested in a Baseball comic?

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>>89408263
mfw

>>89402518
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_n5E7feJHw0

>>89408761
Yeah, she's like the mother of the group, always picking up after the others, cooking for them and lending an open ear, that type of stuff.

>>89406210
not them but why?

>>89409223
they don't allow nsfw stuff but they hide that fact well, and in fact when they first showed up, their tv ads were moronically sexual (and didnt explain what their site was)
wow i actually couldnt type the site dot com or it marked this post as spam

>>89409352
Yeah wtf was that? I always thought/assumed they were a porn site with fake boobs, cowboy hats and monster trucks and just never visited

>>89400450
Love your colors man.

>>89409450
i got curious, wondering what kind of site would have nationwide ads like that.. finding out it was web hosting made me roll my eyes so hard

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>>89408921

anyway, i redesigned my demon juice characters this mourning, thoughts?

sketchbook pro, original characters, havent drawn the blue fire knight yet who is missing from this group!

Once upon a time, in the fire realm (a type of super hell), the grandsons of Lucifuge (a type of super devil, the most powerful demon in all existence) fought each other and when it looked like Emer L. (Emer Lucifuge, the green fire knight) was about to die trying to defend his father and his elite fire knights who was resting in stone Emer L. used an ancient demonic relic that unknown to him held 7 ancient demon gods, the relic saved his life against his brother Ambe L. (Ambe Lucifuge) but at a high price, Emers soul was split into 7 pieces, he was able to hold 1 piece of his demon soul into his own body but the other 6 pieces scattered to the earth realm where they would be raised as humans generation to generation becoming various races and even residing in females if the demon soul pieces should be passed down to one unknown to the humans who own a piece of Emers soul. Ambe Fled the fire realm and sealed his younger brother Emer L. inside, so Emer decided to rest in stone for over 2000 years not aging a single second while in stone form, time completely stopped for him so waking up to our current earth time was only like blinking his eyes to him.

Emer L. sought out his broken soul only to discover they had become his new brothers and sister. He taught them how to activate there fire armors and weapons by screaming "FIRE BOOST!" and thus, the new fire knights where born!

overall epic type of tone im trying to capture here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BCr7y4SLhck

theme song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FAUW0eq0BLA

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Doing character portraits of all the protagonists of the project I'm working on. Here's the first one I've finished.

>>89409537

i forgot to mention that when Emers soul split into 7 pieces it split into 7 new spectrums of light, so from green came red, white, blue, pink, orange, but not only did his soul split but it was tainted by the demon gods that resided in the relic

i got this lore down pat! i just forget to mention stuff sometimes

like the demon gods are a god of each spectrum of light, red light/heat/fire, blue, green, etc

>>89406899
More like you're just so autistic you can't stand somebody doing their own thing outside the box.

>>89409537
looks good man, you're really improving. keep working on the art though

>>89409799
People follow retards like Dobson for entertainment value.

>can't stand somebody doing their own thing outside
Lmao, we wish he would do his own thing away from here. All of us wish he'd just disappear for good. He's a waste of oxygen and his mental diarrhea is a putrid stain on the threads.

>>89410456
I really hope you don't think you represent the threads

>>89410845
don't kid yourself retard

>>89408937
Me, I like sports comics/manga in general

>>89410904
that response doesn't even make sense to what they said

>>89411451
well I think it kind of does. "don't kid yourself, I do represent the threads". it's a valid statement that just isn't true.

>>89409799
This fag right here is the dewd

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>>89411700

>this one's coldfusion
>>89411484

It all makes sense now. The retard who can barely form coherent thoughts struggling to understand a simple sentence, and his dick sucking e-nanny coddling him afterwards.

>>89406210
i'm considering using dreamhost, which as far as i can tell doesn't have an issue with pornographic content, unless i'm mistaken

>>89412130
Good, make sure in their TOS but if that works, go ahead. Having your own host gives you full control. Also lets you get ads, but again, ads might have problems with NSFW.. sometimes you're stuck with j-list

>>89412272
everyone uses adblocker, ads don't give shit. you're getting paid pennies a month to shit up your site

>>89413157
and yet people still claim to be ad-supported.

>>89413180
name one

>>89413197
if i could name one, that would indicate there's only one. instead, they're numerous
I don't get it either, I wonder how they can possibly make ad money when everyone has adblock, but they claim they do anyway

>>89413157
you'd be surprised how many people just don't know about ad blockers

>>89413587
"Preisdents exist"
"Oh yeah name one."
"If I did that would imply they aren't numerous!"

Even if you are right this logic is stupid.

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>>89413209

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>>89413659
>Preisdents exist

>>89413844
Oh, I was thinking it that was some kind of rollercoaster

>>89414124
Burgers don't have president though

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPVOyfwiGf8

>>89414563
>average leftist

>>89413656
This. There are people that genuinely go to walmart and buy dvds from the sales bin. People simply don't know how to use the internet.

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>>89409537
>>89409711

Blue fire knight done

also i know what your all thinking and no its nothing like power rangers: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Wt6XlVob_E

>>89414623
Are you surprised? I'm still disappointed how this is still going, and yet no new Sonichu pages.

politics end here though

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>>89414698

i actually want to do a NON-PROFIT crossover where the green power ranger faces off against the green fire knight who is the main character of demon juice: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QU7k81-YmSY

it will look something like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ap8r3AA0PIk

scorpion is just a ninja with some hell fire demon powers, the green fire knight is a full blown demon though so ofcourse the green power ranger is no match for demon juice, i just want to show off the difference between my fire knights and the power rangers

the green ranger will summon his green dragonzord which is a giant robot lizard, where as the green fire knight just nuclear explodes into a giant demon

i just want to show off how huge the differences are is all

>>89414698
GO! GO! POWER RANGERS!!!
*Guitar riffs*
GO! GO! POWER RANGERS!!!
*More Guitar riffs*
GO! GO!...

yeah you get the point... also bones what the hell man!

where's the black ranger!?
you racist! :^)

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>>89414856

the "black power ranger" I GUESS, HYPOTHETICALLY, would be the equivelent of the MEGAZORD in demon juice

you see when Emer L.'s soul is complete again by fusing with his new brothers and sisters, the new fire knights, they become the giant black fire knight, which is the hollow fire armor of Lucifuge himself!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KLr8gnYpVsg

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>>89413209
bretty gurd let's see some more?

Whelp, I've committed myself to a deadline now for restarting my webcomic, thought I'd share the picture I WAS gonna use for the chapter header but felt it won't fit. Don't know whether to do this "gouache" style for the actual comic or do it more like my previous work.

>>89414994
this isn't an example of that gouache thing right? because I thought I knew what gouache meant and it wasn't this

>>89415063
I went to art school and I'm still a moron about these things. I call it "gouache" mostly because it's kinda how I painted using that type of paint all those years back. so you could be right, you could be wrong.

>>89360891
I like your comic.
Your art style is nice and polished but the monochromatic coloring you're doing is really throwing me off. Consider making the figures a very light tone of the colors you're using instead of just straight white. It'll be a lot gentler on the eyes.

Ugh, I've been working on this, and whenever I think I'm done, I end up finding something new to fix.
In any case, at least something I'm doing is moving forwards. That gotta count for something.

http://imgur.com/Wv9hVw0

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>>89415458
>linking an image of 4chan

>>89415458
>My brother lusted after my body...
You have my utmost support.

>>89415142
I mean I just call this cel shading.

>>89414847
do it my man, at the worst it'll be good practice

>>89415521
Well, I'm not sure if that's shall we say, proper material for a blue board, so I rather not take any chances.

>>89415604
there's not even any nudity faggot

>>89415650
Another thing is that I have the luxury of deleting it whenever I want if I need to, so there's that too.

>>89415723
>trickle truth
The real reason is you want to see how many views it'd get you female

>>89415791
Views on Imgur are not a metric I could have any use for. And if we are to pretend it does, and if I want to do that, I wouldn't delete the pics afterwards, I dunno.
If it rustle your jimmies, I'll try and look a hosting that offers no metric whatsoever.

>>89415791
jesus christ you are insufferable
don't bother responding to him EF

>>89415903
No, it's cool. I see the point, and I think it's a valid one even if it's not what I was aiming for.
I don't see the issue here, t b h.
Anyway, I gotta bail to the office in an hour, I'm gonna try and start with the following page.

>>89414994
whats the link to your webcomic?

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>>89414994
Good Luck!

If you need a guest artist, or something I'd be pretty happy to oblige.

>>89415458
uh, this link aint workin for me. anyone else?

>>89416945
I deleted it, sorry.

Off to work, I don't think I'll be able to lurk from there today. so I'll try tomorrow to post more updates if I get something done.

>>89414994
How can I read this?

>>89417309
aw maaan

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I'm feeling dissatisfied with this cover illustration wip and don't know whether I want to scrap it or just try to fix it. Thoughts?

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>>89360054

am i doing this right?

>>89418653

maybe catch Emers hand on fire?

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>>89418653
>>89418692
woops, forgot pic :/

>>89417963
it's definitely fixable
the problem right now is the background has at least three colors, maybe four, while each character has only one. they deserve at least two. or at LEAST two shades of each color, instead of one solid shade plus shading, making them look like statues

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>>89418715

full body fire look cool....?

>>89418750
nice, fire effects have gotten better. it's not great yet though, keep improving

El Bumpo

>>89418733
Oh no, those aren't the colors on the characters I'm going to use. I just put those colors there to distinguish the character's silhouettes from the background for the time being and speed up the actual coloring. I'm going to do the characters in full color.

Other than that, is there anything else about the picture that seems really off? I know I've got some issues going on with gesture/anatomy but I feel like those aren't the only problems the picture has.

>>89420609
Ohhh okay. interesting, you don't usually see silhouette-distinguishing colors with full shading like that. I assumed it was an artistic choice. Honestly it still could be if you did what I suggested, and maybe save you some time.
In that case.... no it looks great. this is a really nice little scene, I'm jelly.

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http://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/gigatriggrzero/the-book-of-lili-pt-2-unseen/viewer?title_no=56900&episode_no=3

double update this week, this one and another on friday. I hope you like it!

>>89409547
hey isn't that the ben 10 girl

>>89417963
Color wise, it seems okay. it could use some more textures, like the grass, the deck, and the house.

My only concern is where you're going to put the title. It seems cramped at the top, and the bottom might block the wings, which are interesting

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>>89360054
Drafting out my 4'th page. As it's our main character reveal, is there anything you guys think I should add to help bring a bit more impact to his appearance?

>>89423336
this looks pretty reveal-y. i hope the next shot is a full body shot. as a fanartist that's the next thing I look for

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>tfw tinnitus is getting worse every day and the intense ringing prevents you from focusing on your comic

>>89423988
I have constant tinnitus and I do just fine when working
I'm used to it by now

>>89424370
>>89423988
I have it too, 28 and it's getting worse by the year. how old are you guys?

>>89424370
>>89424459
y'all are responding to a regular shitposter, albeit he has gotten very creative with this one

>>89424459
22, but I've actually had it since I was 16

>>89397400
Well when it comes to crying, I usually portray it as very pathetic and meek. So I just write
>uuuuu...uuuuu
>gggghhhhhh, ghhh
or
>aahhhhhuhuuuu...
What really matters is the illustration though

>>89424616
I'm sure he mixes real things in once in a while so he can be like HA nobody believes me so it's okay if i share this personal thing

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What program do you guys use to add in speech bubbles and stuff? My buddy and I are starting a comic and he's the artist, but wants me to take care of the typeset stuff.

>>89424915
There's a number of good ways to do it, but generally you'll be using a shape tool or shaped selection tool, then modifying it in some way.. for example filling it with black, then contracting the selection by however many pixels, then filling with white. Or if you have a shape tool that already makes nice lines on its own, you're good. Then just other shapes for the tails.
anything that has a straight up word balloon tool, I wouldn't rely on completely. It'll always seem canned compared to a custom made one.

Managed to get a minute to post something. So, this is mos def not a blue board pic, but I need the feedback before I go home and start inking.
I feel the last panel is not good.
It's supposed to be a low angle panel but the guy is slouching forward, and I feel it's not clear enough. Would you mind looking it up and see what I mean?
I repeat, it's absolutely NSFW, thank you.

https://68.media.tumblr.com/8d3704970c3c03d726fddc7ccd4d43b6/tumblr_okdpadVU631vfvcrvo1_540.jpg

I'll delete the pic when I get home in a couple of hours, and try to get a better looking one instead.

>>89385774
Might be up to taste but personally I don't think those half circle eyes does your design any good. I feel they fit better on more cutesy and simple designs.

The eyes closed and squinty eyed faces you have made work pretty nicely because the eyes are clearly defined.

If I were you I would draw the opened eyes following the same anatomical rules as those ones do.

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Drunk comics

>>89362065
>>89362039
He likes Zim and Homestuck

Black and white or color?

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>>89425678
I would crop the last panel to just this

>>89427199
Forgot to add - and maybe at the bottom of this panel add get upper thighs etc

Also, hot - now we're getting somewhere

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New Wilfreda the Wanna-Be Witch page is up. Wilfreda gets late christmas presents from her friends, Victor tries a prank, totally forgets she claims to be a witch, prank backfires on his other friends.

Cute stuff. You can read more at http://wilfredacomic.tumblr.com/

>>89427199
>>89427224
Okay, thanks a lot, I'll see what I can do.

>>89418750
That looks like a shitty, blurry mess. Stop relying so much on effects that you clearly don't know how to use properly and learn proper drawing skills.

>>89413157
>everyone uses adblocker
My adsense analytics suggest otherwise.

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Completed another character portrait.

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>>89426280
This thread is dead so I guess I'll finally address this.

I've only even read a part of homestuck after being compared to it and I'd hardly say I liked it, couldn't even get through half of it. Even the similarities to what I'm working on are pretty tenuous. It had a video game guy with 3D glasses but then again so did neopets. Not to mention the red/blue was a reference to the colors in the actual existing gemini system as well as a reference to the matrix. Duality isn't a new concept and using red/blue to symbolize that is so common it literally has it's own tv tropes page.

Invader zim is great though and I've liked it since I was a kid, I'll admit that's a huge inspiration to my work. Even it uses red/blue to symbolize the opposing characters and the mood swings of GIR though.

>>89422251
I don't even know what you're referring to. Lets just say I've copied everything I've ever done and nothing I've created is unique, I don't even care at this point.

I only come to these threads for critique on how to improve and I haven't even got that recently.

>>89431114
I wouldn't come here seeking validation - this place is trash, I mean just look at who's still around? Everyone that was good (except Dewd, that was as miracle) wisened up and left this godforsaken place

>>89431348
Well I don't come here for validation or even compliments. But in the past I usually found some good critique and it's helped me improve drastically in the past year. The threads have really gone to shit in the past month or so though.

>>89424915
After rejecting most free alternatives I just decided to pirate Manga Studio.

Works like a charm, it's almost fun!

>>89425678
It looks about right to me. the angle is clearly low since you see her on the bed like that

>>89426261
That's pretty damn good right there.
now i wanna be friends with these girls
>>89427258
aww and it's a crab spider even.
>>89431412
They wax and wane. it's happened many times before. This slump is just coming after a really long upswing.

>>89417369 i found it
>https://tapastic.com/kennethmcfarlane

>>89362039
awesome work dupe

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>>89426261
That's retarded. I love it.

>>89416499
Hey man or woman.! This is fucking amazing, absolute blows my mind that people love Baph-chan enough to do fan art, I'd like to see some of your og work. I'm currently in bed downing cold and flu tabs so this has perked me up a little. Plan to do some prelims tonight, I may post some but I'm feeling pretty shitty.

Also totes saved this and I dunno about guest artist YET. But I'll stay in touch :)

>>89424915

i just use sketchbook pro for everything

>>89427964
mfw: >>89408978

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Why are all the protagonists ITT girls?

>>89434629
Can mine not really count cause she's not human? Haha.
My other comic has a lot more male characters so I'd thought it'd be fun to do a series focused on a female character. Wasn't really intentional just wanted to mix it up.

>>89392850
there is something oddly stiff about her expression in panel one.

>>89434629
It was an accident. It started out with the typical mostly-male cast, then they all had little sisters, daughters, etc, so for the next generation it was almost all girls. I regret it. Fun to draw, sure, but hard to make flawed-enough.

>>89434629
More fun to draw

>>89409547
So her hair is tucked into this high collar on the left right but loose on the right with the collar missing.
I see the red/blue halves and i assuming thats a style choice, but its going to be pretty difficult to get a half-collar to stay up like that, especially at the angle its sticking out at.
High collars are often made out of stiff heavy fabric and kept close to the neck for support.

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>>89435023
Well the collar is symmetrical it's just that her hair is blocking it on one side due to her hair being within the collar. All of the uniforms for her faction have huge collars to conform to helmets so they can act as a sort of modular casual space suit.

Pic related is an old doodle of her basic outfit. I think I'll probably just give her long bangs going over the collar with the rest of the hair up, now that you point out how strange it is.

how do we save these threads? now that dewd is gone things can finally turn around

>>89435292
>her hair is blocking it on one side due to her hair being within the collar.
I'm afraid that explanation doesn't jive in 3d but that's okay, few people are going to analyze it hard enough to notice

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>>89435446
I'm afraid I just don't understand.

Why would the other side of the collar be visible at all? It's on the other side of her head and being covered because her hear and head are inside of the collar.

>>89435541
look at your head-on drawing again
see how if you draw vertical lines from the points of the collar on either side of the collar's gap, they immediately hit the face? that's because the face is wider than the gap between the two sides of the collar.. which means the collar is in front of her face, you can't hide one side of it period