Let's discuss the Homestuck update that just came out like

But the mods hate Homestuck, OP.

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I wonder how Roxy knows where she is

Does she have the down low on what's going on as queen of derspit? Does she have chess people spies?

Where the fuck is Jane?

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So are we thinking race war, or anti-Industrial hippies as the cause for Jane's kidnapping?

>>87636977
>random rebels manage to kidnap a fucking god
Cohen is fucking awful at this.

>>87636979

That's always what I think with this retarded new gimmick.

I'm already so sick of this shit, can't they just Pesterchum like they used to?

Is it all on snapchat? I refuse to get an account.

>>87636993

They didn't really kidnap her, they just hacked her teleporter. It's not like they overpowered her or anything.

>>87636993
millennials can't look away form their phone long enough to notice they're being kidnapped

>>87637004
http://upd8.ninja/snaps/

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Why can't we just die in peace

Why must you fuck the corpse

>>87636977
>I wonder how Roxy knows where she is
Mary Sue.

>no sign of Dirk or Jake on the alpha kids' arc starting day
>no sign of Caliborn on his fucking birthday
Cohen...

>>87637031
>gay
This shouldn't somehow be a quality for things being good.

>>87637010
>brb being kidnapped tell my parents [emoji spam]

>>87637040

Silly 4channer, Caliborn is a sexist woman-hater and HAS NO PLACE IN THIS HUGBOX COMIC!!!

RRRRREEEEEEE!!!

>check mspa
>nothing
If it's not there then it's not a real update sorry
You're reading fanfiction

honestly im rooting for the rebels

>>87636977
>Does she have chess people spies?
This and fenestrated walls. Just like the queen she overtook

>>87637044
Welcome to new Homestuck, where the updates are not "how good can we make this" but rather "how much of our agenda shit can we fit into this"

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>>87637067
There are many complaints to be levied on Cohen, but that is not one. Caliborn is his favorite character.

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>>87637067
Think about it Anon

Remember Caliborn trapped John in a shallow void of a comic he called homosuck, where John's friends were pale immitations of the people he knew?

Well now John is in a future where everyone sucks and is a homo

Homosuck never left Anon

>>87637094

I was mainly joking.

Though it honestly surprised me he likes Caliborn when he's such an obvious SJW and spineless liberal.

>>87637094
He doesn't actually "like" him though.

>>87637067
He has an entire segment dedicted to explaining why he likes yaoi

Isn't that progressive enough?

>>87637106
Obviously, he likes him as a character but he doesn't like him as a person and doesn't want good things to happen to him.

>>87637134
Obviously it doesn't matter. I can say my favorite book is "In Search of Lost Memories", it doesn't mean I understand it.

This was a test for Cohen and so far he's made a straight character gay, and bored me to tears. He failed.

>>87637106
He's the only character that never stops being funny and he ironically ends up with more growth and accomplishments than the main characters even though his "thing" was supposed to be that the villain in a coming of age story is hopelessly stunted and can never come of age. It's hard not to like him.

>>87637134

Well yeah, he IS the villain. Why would good things happen to him?

I don't like him as a person either, he's literally a Omnicidal maniac.

>>87637167
>Well yeah, he IS the villain. Why would good things happen to him?

Cause he worked for it. What, we gonna try applying morality in this void of a comic? Why is Nepeta dead as fuck when John could have saved her?

>>87637166

I know, but he's a "misogynist" and a "bully", so I just assumed die-hard liberals would automatically hate him.

>>87637156
>>87637167
Well, Caliborn is just a kid. Lord English is the problem. You wouldn't be too happy if you were meshed into a monster with crazy people you'd turn into a genocidal abomination too.

>>87637194
Nah man, Cohen likes him. I think Cohen's actually gonna be a pretty cool dude, people are overreacting to his tweets. Just look at his explanations to why he likes Caliborn, and you'll see that he's actually-Hahaha. Yeah right. Like I'm gonna say that. You suck Cohen.

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Greetings. I own a prosperous animation studio in California, and I'm very interested in creating a Homestuck TV show. But first, a few questions.
I heard you had a hiatus that lasted several years? Yes, very interesting.
I also heard you lost several millions of dollars under mysterious circumstances, is that correct? Hmm, I see.
Homestuck features numerous instances of copyrighted material. No infringement here, I trust?
Last question: how would you describe your level of commitment to Homestuck? "Outsourced it, haven't touched it in years"? Well, that's very reassuring.
Thanks for the interview! I look forward to working with you, mr. Hoossie.

These snapchat updates are fucking retarded. How do I even view them if I don't want to download a shitty app

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>>87637236
>Sorry Mr. Hussy! We've decided to go with this young man's pitch instead!

>>87637258

There's a Tumblr dedicated to posting the updates.

>>87637258
Mother fucker I JUST posted it.

http://upd8.ninja/snaps/

>>87637261

Who the Hell is that?

>>87637261
>Because the characters are so simple an eight year old can get them!
>And they do! And they love them!

>>87637167
>Why would good things happen to him?
Because Hussie failed at making him seem threatening after his entry flash and he came across as some hardworking dumb kid who wanted to make art, with the real villain being a volatile collection of souls that Dirk made? He didn't do anything that made me want to see him defeated or punished, so I want him to get as good an ending as the rest of the main characters did.

this is like the lamest update ever

not to mention there's no tension they're gods

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>>87637261
>implying Toby needs an investor
I bet he sponsored Hiveswap out of pity.

>>87637295

But he DID want to destroy things, the art was just a temporary thing. He even said after his masterpiece was done, it was time to move on to become all-powerful and wreak havoc. And he seemed rather enthusiastic about it too.

>>87637285
Ryan North, creator of fancomic "Act 8".

>>87637296

It literally isn't canon.

>Not drawn by Hussie
>Not written by Hussie
>Not on the MSPA site

It's just glorified fanfiction.

>>87637281
That's handy, thanks.
These udpates still suck though

>>87637261
>Oh, you made a game too Andrew?
>How long did you spend writing it?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PFZAcOcE2No

>>87637317
No, he said he wanted to be an artist but still had a passion for destruction. He only got pissed because everyone destroyed his art and his "future" and forced him into a puppet.

>>87637335

He's the motherfucking LORD OF TIME. If he really wanted to avoid that future, he probably could have.

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>Dante Basco is no longer associated with What Pumpkin
>John Warren, the -former- What Pumpkin Buisiness Dev, has picked up a more vibrant and promising career opportunity with Zoe Quinn
>Ryan North is no longer a writer or director on Hiveswap
>Hussie is no longer writing or directing Hiveswap
>Cohen Edenfield has gone from "writer", to "headwriter", to "Creative Director" of Hiveswap

This is going to be

Well it's gonna be interesting. Imagine if they have like a second crowdfunder when they admit they don't have the dosh for an episode 2

>>87637261
>>87637309
>>87637333
Tobyposters please go.

>>87637389
>ryan north leaving hiveswap
>and yet I'm even less interested in it now
What fucking reality did I fall into

>>87637366
This seems like more of a plothole than anything. He's never seen using his powers once. I don't think he wanted his art to be destroyed.

>>87637335

You really think he was just gonna sit in that little base and make art for the rest of his life?

>>87637409
He said he wanted to be an artist, Anon.

>>87637408

I feel like the Cairo Overcoat somehow ties into it, but that's kind of vague and is probably the even more vague clockwork stuff.

Where the fuck did he get that anyway? I know it was probably made from that coat Kurloz took, but how did it grow and become magical?

>>87637317
But because of bad writing we spend most of our time with him as an artist and only see him intentionally fucking things up a couple times. Hussie didn't do a good job at making me feel like he was dangerous or evil.

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>>87637389
You'd have to be crazy NOT to back it!

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>>87637333
Actually, the twitter guy does all the writing.

>>87637423

And how long would it take for him to get bored?

Being a destructive lunatic is LITERALLY hardwired into his DNA. The artist thing wouldn't have lasted.

I love Caliborn, I really do, but I'm not gonna pretend like he isn't a maniac and a legit villain.

>>87637409
Maybe, if nobody had shown up to kick his ass. He seemed pretty autistic.

>>87637449
Yeah that was pretty autistic to beat up a kid for his comic. Wtf John

>>87637425
The Felt?
>>87637446
He said he had a passion for art and kept with it enough to legitimately improve. Caliborn would've been violent, sure, but it'd be part-time to his artistry.

>>87637467

But no one in The Felt has the ability to make clothes magical. The only one close enough is Stitch, but if he can do that we never hear of it.

If only Hussie decided to TIE UP loose ends like this...

>>87637486
They have time powers though. And Stitch's name is literally "stitch" so it makes sense?

>>87637446
>Being a destructive lunatic is LITERALLY hardwired into his DNA.
Same with trolls originally but that ended up getting more and more disregarded as the comic went on until they were basically just gray humans. Huss doesn't care about ignoring the biological details he makes up.

>>87637408
Caliborn's power is just his personality. Things go his way because he's a stubborn fuck who doesn't waste his time regretting his past, and presses ever forward. Things work out for him because he's willing to make them work out for him.

>>87637510
But he's also literally a Time player who God-Tiered.

>>87637503

Maybe. But it'd be nice for confirmation, I suppose.

>>87637510

That raises the question of why there's a timeline where Calliope was more stubborn and powerful than he was just because she was more jaded.

>>87637532
But that will never happen now.

>>87637507
I mean you're mostly right, I mean Doc Scratch is Alternia's First Guardian, he or the comic said he molded the trolls into the perfect SBURB-playing machines, what with Alternian culture forcing the young to fend for themselves and having to build their own homes and all.

>>87637569
It still makes sense for them to be naturally violent with that though.

So Jane's in a gay poly relationship with Roxy and Callie now? Is John the only straight left? and Dad I guess.

>>87637596
Dad's dead.

>>87637596

Don't forget Dave and Karkat.

>>87637545
They had no human contact in that timeline. Social interaction weakens her because it makes her a friendly pushover and strengthens him because it gives him people to mess with and be spiteful towards. Without the humans, you have a regular cherub vs a mentally disabled one and the disabled one loses.

>>87637603
b2 dad

>>87637605
pan and bi

>>87637620
B2 Dad is also dead.

>>87637615
>join CTR
are they making a new crash team racing?

>>87637545
Because Caliborn wasn't exposed to other people in that timeline either, and Caliborn only became who he is by fucking with other people.

>>87637630
No? we saw him in the credits. At Rose and Kanaya's wedding

>>87637641
He died after that. Remember John looking at his stuff?

>>87637614

But Caliborn's shtick is that he's the most stubborn guy around, so even then I expected him to win.

>>87637620

Dave is totally straight, nothing proves otherwise.

>>87637647
that was his dad's stuff. not his son's stuff

>>87637664
dave likes moms and dicks bro he is pan

>>87637666
He had a death shrine.

>>87637647

That was his own Dad, you idiot.

>>87637647
No, he lives in the Human Kingdom with Jane and sent John an authentic hat and pipe for his birthday.

If there's one lesson to learn from Act 6 and Cohen, it's that gay characters are a surefire indication of weaker writing.

Tokenism on crack, essentially. A gay character is a character the writer thinks of once and then considers again.

>>87637681
But how did he get his stuff?
>>87637684
Why was there somber music playing?

>>87637664
>But Caliborn's shtick is that he's the most stubborn guy around, so even then I expected him to win.
Obviously that part was an acquired trait.

>>87637677
for his dad from b1. jane's dad is alive and straight.

>>87637596
Jade?

Probably not for long tho, Davepeta will come back for maximum pandering because it's somehow popular.

>>87637707
>But how did he get his stuff?
because it was still in the house?

>Why was there somber music playing?
he was reminiscing

>>87637664
>nothing proves otherwise.

Careful, you might trigger icels.

>>87637722
jade's gonna hook up with jasprose

>>87637389

>warren

That chuck tingle thing?

>>87637722
Davepeta/Jade is somehow vaguely popular because Davekat fans find it a convenient way to get rid of Jade

>>87637725
Wait, that was his house. How'd his house get there? Fuck.

>>87637647
Not the same anon, but am I the only one that thinks this non-credits content is implied to be going on at the same time as the credits, but they just weren't made yet?

>>87637589
But all the living trolls spent three years in isolation, barring two humans and a caraprician. It'd make sense for them to end up less violent than when they started. Mostly boredom setting in.

>>87637743
Funny because Davepeta/Karkat would make more sense anyway. They're both worthless.

>>87637743
why not davepeta/kakat so nepeta finally gets with karkat, and karkat still gets a dave
and dave gets with jade

i feel like there's gonna be a reveal with Hussie soon

like he's gonna announce plans for something and its just gonna be such an unfathomable "FUCK YOU" to his few remaining fans

>>87637743
Davepeta/Jade would work because they had a deep talk, kissed, and they're both weird sprite furries

>>87637746
No, I mean genetically. Like, Doc Scratch fucked with their genetics to make them predisposed.

Trolls becoming the kids' best buddies is wrong for many other reasons though.

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>>87637684
>>87637707
I thought John just found his Dad's stash with a certificate of authenticity, saying something along the lines of
>Son, if you can read this, it means you're old enough to bla bla bla, and I'm probably dead.
>You inherit my fedora, pipe and a ton of shaving cream
>I'm so proud of you

>>87637776

Can't.

Fucking.

Wait.

>>87637776
>like he's gonna announce plans for something and its just gonna be such an unfathomable "FUCK YOU" to his few remaining fans
act 7 already happened

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So, here's a random theory.

The reason why none of the kids or Trolls give a shit about their planets and people dying is because they're programmed not to care. They ARE constructs of the game, so it'd make sense for the game to remove any distractions from moving forward in the game.

>>87637782
Davepeta's main component broke up with Jade in another timeline because he thought Dave would be a better fit. And he was right. Davesprite gave that shit up, he doesn't get it back because he's suddenly become a shittier character.

so are Earth C born Trolls not psychotic assholes or something

everything seems so sterile and fake in these updates

everyone is just standing around smiling and posing, but theres no actual substance or "life" to it

i mean its been 5000 fucking years, how have these kingdoms managed to keep the peace

you think by that time the Godtiers would have fallen to petty infighting just to break the boredom of everlasting life

>>87637776

But he already handed over Hivesawp to a retard.

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>>87637800
>Davepeta's main component
excuse me

>>87637776
>such an unfathomable "FUCK YOU"
Is that even possible at this point?

I don't even go on the website anymore. At this point I use Homestuck threads in essentially the same way others use Questionable Content/Dumbing of Age threads.

>>87637798
That's fucked up. But the parents existed before the game in flashbacks? And Dad isn't even made through ectobiology?

>>87637814
the component that was actually a character

>>87637800
>he thought Dave would be a better fit. And he was right.
What?

>>87637801
>how have these kingdoms managed to keep the peace
We might be starting to see now that they haven't

They never showed any of the trolls or humans in the credits aside from the egg trolls

>>87637820

Who said anything about the parents?

>>87637801
I wanna say it was subjuggalo and scratch influences that made trolls go apeshit. Beforus existed and trolls weren't crazy then.

Of course this was after alternia was made so they were of course intended to be hyper violent originally.

>>87637815
>Is that even possible at this point?
He didn't tweet "homestuck fans are just bigots who want to keep women out of gaming".

>>87637837
Cloaca can't fit in a vagina. penis can fit in a vagina

>>87637844

Meenah was a homicidal maniac though. She outright admitted to trying to murder Meulin for no reason.

>>87636937
Where's the update, twitter again or something?

>>87637854
something something fuschia bloods
something something kill the rivals to the throne

>>87637786
Oh, Doc Scratch had about as much genetic influence over the trolls as Bec from what I remember from the comic. Correct me if I'm wrong and this is only because of Alpha Feferi being empress, but the Beforus trolls aren't as violent as the Alternian trolls.

>>87637853
but jade has a dog dick. all space players have giant dongs

>>87637814
You fucking heard me. Nepeta was a non-character and her merging with Davesprite was a fucking travesty that is good evidence that Hussie forgot how to write in any capacity.

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>>87637820

I didn't even mention Dad you literal retard, I'm talking about the kids and Trolls. The fucking PLAYERS.

>>87637776
what else could he possibly fuck up
seriously, I think the well is dry
he's reached maximum fuckup

>>87637843
Oh, shit, my bad. But how exactly would that work? I've thought about the kids have their minds numbed in-game somehow because of that but the worlds kind of exist outside of Sburb (trolls have no reason to give a shit about Alternia.)

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>>87637772
HUSSIE
MORE LIKE HACK-SEE

>>87637863

But Feferi didn't feel that way towards Meenah. Not that we ever saw.

>>87637853
vagina can't fit in a vagina either but that doesn't stop lesbans

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>Jane's fantastic tits

>>87637873
>>87637877
Shut up, I'm tired as fuck. Wouldn't that kind of defeat the purpose of having a game?

>>87637896
>dat blush
what did cohen mean by this

>>87637856
snapchat because Cohen thinks its a clever gimmick

What happened to Homestuck's dialogue? It started feeling so wooden near the end...

>>87637853
Dave's penis is too small to pleasure a needy woman like Jade

>>87637864
>but the Beforus trolls aren't as violent as the Alternian trolls.
I hate this being a thing.

>>87637877

Well, the ectobiology thing is a game construct, so that makes the players that as well. It'd kind of explain some things like their general apathetic nature towards meteors destroying their planets and having to fight monsters. Since they are technically video game characters, they have certain functions programmed into them, like not caring when their planet is destroyed. Though I guess that last part mostly falls to the humans.

>>87637910

Dave's boner can't boner, his dick is too small.

>>87637908
ghostwriters, though Hussie will never admit it

i'm almost positive that he actually stopped writing the dialog in the aftermath of GAME OVER

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>>87637910
All he has to do is hug her and tell her she's a good doggy

>>87637917
technically isn't the entire universe a game construct

>>87637917
That defeats the purpose of them playing a game. I'd like to think it's like a chemical thing or something external blocking out the emotions or distracting them.

Them being programmed just feels dumb and kind of contradictory.
>>87637943
Yes.

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>>87637867
or maybe people put davesprite on a pedestal when he was just a dead dave with nothing to do but die

two non-characters got together so they could at least live irrelevantly in bliss

>>87637932
You mean it can boner, but there's no noticeable difference

>>87637884
I dont know if they ever did meet. I'll assume that she would but if its ever brought up Hussie/Cohen/Whoever is currently writing the comic would probably forget about that aspect.

Honestly I'm getting very bored at this. The only info that's come out since 6/12 was the kids DID make it to Earth and thats about it.
Besides that it's all been useless fluff to drag people along carrot-on-a-stick style. The Homestuck I love hasn't shown it's face in a long time and the fact that Hussie hasn't had a hand in these halloween or 11/11 mini fluff updates is kind of sealing it ya know? And with the Hiveswap final trailer looking so unfinished that game doesn't look super promising. It'll probably go the way of Kentucky Route zero and either never finish or take literal years to end

>>87637934
someone should do statistical analysis on word choice, etc so we have real evidence

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>>87637896

>>87637911
Same

>>87637908
Probably >>87637934, but I'm still hoping pic related is still relevant. I can only dream /hst/

>>87637945

Well, for whatever reason, the Universe feels the need to make another one seemingly at random.

It's never really explained, so I dunno.

>>87637932
Dave's penis is four inches when erect, which is perfectly adequate!

>>87637948
>or maybe people put davesprite on a pedestal when he was just a dead dave with nothing to do but die
You take that shit back.

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>>87637966
fuck

>>87637959
i ain't got the boondollars for that man

unless some autist does it pro bono i'm outta luck

>>87637405
The darkest timeline

>>87637966
Scratch should have had control over all of the trolls and made them all equally violent and shit. Or maybe he was in the other session and this first session was just an experiment...

>>87637975
But then why would it use a game? That makes no sense.

>>87637798
I think they just got overloaded with trauma. Along with all the absurd shit that happens to them and the crazy tihngs they can do, and finding out about the insane reality of multiple universes and time and aliens, it's literally too much to process. They can only handle thinking about their personal problems and their objectives

>>87638016

How the fuck should I know? Ask Hussie, not me.

I just wanted to make an explanation as to why the kids give zero shits about Earth being wiped out.

>>87638004
For some reason Scratch not only needed Trolls he also needed humans, so nonviolent Trolls are a must in order to make humans.

>>87637389
is the homestuck franchise going to die
it seriously looks like it is

>>87637937
>jade does the dog thing without dave's hand even moving

Fucking floozy

>>87638025

One or two of them handling it this way, but all EIGHT of the humans? Seems a tad strange. I'd expect at least one of them to just sit in a corner with shock or something. People react to traumatic events in different ways, normally.

>not everyone is okay with how things are on Earth C

Good, finally something. Hope it will make these teens reconsider how things went.

>>87638026
We have a proper explanation for that we made.

And this could be drugs or something. Making them a mechanic is just weird.
>>87638028
Makes perfect sense, actually.

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>>87637956
I think credits was a good point to let go.

Is there any reason to actually read the update?

>>87638032
Jade's spent most of her life without any human contact. You could hold her hand and she'd cream herself

>>87638004
It didn't show him sending the Handmaid into both universes, only makes sense that what we see is all he did considering how human-like the Beforus trolls were.

>>87638028
The Beforus trolls could have just been a harmless byproduct, but otherwise agreed.

Wait, will this serve to explore Jane's character a bit more and give her something to do.

You know, the thing he was too incompetent to do in the actual main story?

And for an official post story content it sure looks like fanart. And reads as such.

>>87638051
honestly the closest thing i can say to being positive about the updates is that the entire thing has only like 8 lines of dialog

thats about the best i can spin it

>>87638051

Only if you have a bile fascination and like feeling justified rage.

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>>87637901
threesomes

>>87637782
Also dog/cat would be neat
And jade was the kid nepeta said she liked

>>87638062
What if he tried to make them more sociable and peaceful? Like, the counter to the trolls? And then when he realized it didn't work, he switched and went the exact opposite direction.

What if it's a master plan?

>>87638067

This: >>87637324

>>87637782
And also because then karkat can have dave all to himself o3o

>>87637025
>roxy skele becomes more explicit
I am genuinely frustrated. What the fuck is the point? I just don't understand.

>>87638082
Jade has shit tastes.

>>87637647
That was HIS Dad, as in, the one from the Beta timeline. You can't possibly be this retarded.

>>87638101
the point is to string along all of the fangirls until it's time for them to by hiveswap volume 1 episode 1

>>87638082
I think Nep would get along with all the kids really, she's autistic but not unpleasant to be around or talk to

>>87638109
Nepeta said she liked Jade.
Jade didn't like any of the trolls, and only really seemed to consider the dave part of Davepeta worthwhile. Which is correct. It's amusing how people are grasping at straws to try and get Jade out of the way of their yaois.

ROXY
IS
A
SLUT
SLUT
SLUT
JOHN
IS
A
KEK
KEK
KEK

>>87638081
but jane is straight

>>87638115
I thought the other one died. Why do you have to be such a dick, dude? And explain something already explained like 15 minutes ago?

>>87638101
Didn't the author say they were writing more gay stuff because of the election? Pretty simple reason.

>>87638127
strilondes will apply sexual innuendo to anything with a pulse

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>>87638122
Jade also liked Kanaya.

>>87638122
Nepeta has shit tastes.

>>87638127
not no more she ain't
GAY SINGULARITY

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>>87637031
Oh fuck, I forgot about the whole, muh agenda rant
>>87638135
yes, my mistake.

>>87638116
I fucking hate this. Why is she whereing a bandanna? Why did everyone abandon John. Why should I care AT ALL about these horrible people. There is no mystery or engagement in the world, least of all through snap chat. We're not exploring the future with them. We're getting mundane snaps of boring things happening to immortal Gods.

I fucking hate that I ever picked this shit up and I hate that I don't ignore these threads.

only john has the willpower and strength to resist the insidious cosmic virus causing the gay singularity
it's up to him to save the world from the gay

>>87638145
Again, I was right. Jade has shit tastes.

>>87638170
>whereing
Wew lad. Wearing. I've been making some weird typos lately

>>87637693
Act 5's gay parts were fine and Dirk was alright though

Pandering is different from gay characters existing

>>87638092
...now that I think about it, if it weren't for Alternian trolls and humans, Lord English wouldn't have existed. Doc Scratch could have been the one to organize the scratch so he could get the one piece of himself that never existed in his current universe. Doc was just setting up the board for Lord English's creation, and it just happened to involve starting the game over when Jack Noir ended the session prematurely. Shit, Doc Scratch might have been counting on Karkat activating the ~ath code to give the beta troll session cancer in the first place. Again, correct me if I'm wrong.

>>87638170
>whereing
Holy shit, dude.

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>>87638127

>>87637786
Kanaya's caste was made to be nurturing, probably, if Dolorosa is anything to go by, and Karkat and the Signless are anomalies. They were always made out to be the only two "sane" ones of the trolls. Vriska and Gamzee definitely weren't. Terezi struggled with her very existence and ended up not being friends with the humans in either timeline, preferring to hang around the insane trolls.

>>87637911
I don't, it drives home how much of an influence Scratch had. He played an entire planet and civilization like a bunch of puppets. It does make the fangs and horns seem pretty tacked on though

>>87638182
>implying this is actually /hsg/

also enjoy your possible ban for even mentioning it, i've seen it happen before

>>87638189
ehhhh gamtav was pretty cringey

>>87638170
Your mother and I hate you too

>>87638182
I'm not new here. /hst/ can be pretty comfy and I'm kind of tired right now so I'm I just want hugs and kisses.

>>87638191
I noticed, please do not bully me. I have been strung out the last couple of days. Besides, my new browser doesn't use spell check so when I do retarded shit I'll only notice if I bother to reread the post.

>>87638170
>whereing
its a a rogue mask

>>87638199
>>87638182
y'all is both newfags, there was never a thing called /hsg/

>>87638206
nah it would have been cringey if Tavros went along with it and they were perfect gay little babies uwu~

i was perfectly fine with Tavros just avoiding it and never mentioning it again

>>87638216
You're a stupid dumb idiot, baka. You deserve to be bullied.

>>87638199
wwhat are you talkin about anon
/hsg/ nevver evven existed

>>87638230
yeah and there was never Piggy's Dumpgarbage or the board on 8khan either, those never happened

you're just imagining all of this, silly

>>87638209
>implying this is news
Too late to the post anon.

>>87638220
But why. They clearly don't care about all that. It's fucking stupid. Worse for someone who can uniquely generate things, why slice up some cloth for it. Absolutely horrible.

>>87638238
This is some weak bullying for a typo.

>>87638194
Even in Hussie's corrupted and twisted jokes John is still the last straight man.

>>87638197
Also, highbloods are more violent and shit like that. Regardless, Anon, they dynamic was never meant to be that.

No, it doesn't. I want all of the trolls to be manipulated by Scratch no matter the universe- that'd drive it home even better.

>>87638264
It is weak bullying because I don't want to be TOO mean and make you cry.

>>87636937
I thought you faggots got your own containment board /mlp/ style.

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>>87638285

NOT MY HOMESTUCK

>>87638293
nevver happened anon
you must be imaginin stuff
wweh

>>87638293
We're not even a problem here. Fuck off.

>>87638262
BRO DID NOTHING WRONG

>>87638297
I'm sorry for bullying on the Internet. I'll never do it again.

>>87638257
He means it was HSG because people didn't type general titles /like this/ yet

>>87638122
I sincerely don't care about any dave or jade ships, just givin points why davepeta/jade could work or be neat thematically. In fact I kinda despise davekat and davejade for how much I have to read about how much people weirdly care about them

>>87638262
Probably exactly what happened. Bro did nothing wrong.

>>87638230
>>>/vg/159997723

https://youtu.be/DNc4betndz8 What next then

>>87638098
Do you see "davekat shipper" in every post that talks about a different ship for jade

>>87638343
shit I've been hoisted by my own retard

>>87638245
POTATO KNISHES
>>87638315
Never forget.
https://brostuck.bandcamp.com/track/at-the-price-of-broblivion

>>87638335
>>87638351
>In fact I kinda despise davekat and davejade for how much I have to read about how much people weirdly care about them
This.

I want Meulin to suuuuuuuuuuck my diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick

>>87638359
Checkmate.

>>87638393
She's a slut.

>>87638384
Did people even care about DaveJade until it became the only chance at taking down Davekat? I remember it always taking a backseat to more exotic ships like Daverezi.

>>87638384
I can't speak for everyone but for me davekat is emblematic of all of the issues in post-retcon homestuck so I can't stop shitting on it

>>87638393
meulin is for hug not fug ya glubbin landdwweller piece a shit

>>87638415
nah man Meulin probably was/is a slut

>>87638410
It's vanilla so of course there were people who cared.
>>87638414
No, it's not. The retcon is.

>>87638436
>No, it's not. The retcon is.
what
did you misread my post somehow

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>>87638359
>hoisted by my own retard

>>87638453
retards are good at hoisting, man

dat 'tard strength is no mere myth

>>87638445
Aw shit, I did. It's still dumb to me. The retcon should represent everything wrong with itself? I don't know, Anon. Don't call me dumb. Please.

>>87638335
>In fact I kinda despise davekat and davejade for how much I have to read about how much people weirdly care about them
that's retarded.

>>87638189
Act 5's gay parts were brief one-sided shitty jokes aside from the rosemary stuff. Like, the joke was that John and Tavros and Karkat were put off by Karkat and Gamzee and Eridan's advances. No mutual guy/guy tension anywhere, unlike the shitload of of het and lesbian stuff.

I mean it's better than the substanceless tacked on shit we got now but it wasn't good gay content

And heck it continued in Act 6 - Horuss was a creep to Rufioh who wasn't into it, and Dirk was a creep to Jake who I honestly don't remember expressing any genuine attraction to Dirk

>>87638496
and yet somehow homestuck is the bastion of gay representation that the community needs

>>87638496
in Horuss' defense, him and Rufioh were in a relationship, so the advances weren't uncalled for

he just was too optimistic and naive to realize Rufioh had completely checked out of the relationship

Have there been any actual indications from Hussie lately about his feelings towards Homestuck?

Obviously he isn't focusing on it especially much, credits aside, but it seems like people project quite a bit onto him as far as motivations go. Just kind of honestly curious.

>>87638274
>No, it doesn't. I want all of the trolls to be manipulated by Scratch no matter the universe- that'd drive it home even better.
But how? He was only in the alpha troll universe, wasn't he?

>>87638531
He's cut off all communications online except for what appears in his newsposts. He did make some appearances at cons though, I think? And ipgd had been leaking some shit but it wasn't very promising

>>87638534
No, I think he was in both actually (somehow). He just had minimal impact on the Alpha session.

I remember dreaming about the epilogue a long time ago. It was hyped to shit because trailers had promised a fully animated movie with voice actors, and it looked like if Act 7 was done by a professional animation studio. Turns out the animated portion, aka the actual epilogue, was about the same level of fluff we're getting now, but with the beta kids goofing around in a forest, looking like they did when they were first introduced, while going to a treehouse; and it only made up about a fourth of the film. Turns out, the other portion of the movie was a documentary about Hussie, focusing on a dramatic reenactment of the kickstarter fallout that made for most of the actual running time. Worst part is they left the animated portion on a goddamn cliffhanger.

Point is, if this is why Hussie is in California now, we're fucked and I'm calling it now. cap this maybe

>>87638496
>Dirk was a creep to Jake who I honestly don't remember expressing any genuine attraction to Dirk
Here we go again.

Jake agreed to date Dirk but Dirk constantly wanting to hang out freaked out Jake a bit so he distanced himself, Dirk tried to reach out more, Jake didn't communicate, etc, etc.

It was kind of a thing on both sides but then again, both sides handled it poorly.

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Chest piece Troll

>>87638595
Dirk sounded like a sociopathic stalker while trying to get Jake to date him though, and Jake said he felt like he had no choice because Dirk would make it happen no matter what anyway

>>87638583
i would unironically watch that

>>87638637
no that's saltin pepper his horns are salt and pepper shakers

>>87638637
Slaves confirmed.

>>87638637
he's a waiter

his horns are pepper grinders

because he's a waiter

its not chess related

>>87638595
Yes, but despite that Jake still didn't show any genuine attraction. It was more the "Oh, guess I will go along with it kind." that John also exhibits in certain other areas.

>>87638470
Nah
I don't care about them, but tumblr and every thread here is consumed by people bitching about them or fellating them, it's a pretty valid reason for the ships to leave a bad taste in my mouth. Jade and Karkat are nothing but onaholes for Dave to you fucks

>>87638649
Not really, Anon. I think he's just a lonely dude.
>he felt like he had no choice because Dirk would make it happen no matter what anyway
That's pushing it.
>>87638662
Jake was a boyslut and flirted with the idea of going out with everyone in the Alpha group. It definitely had some attraction.

>>87637776
>its just gonna be such an unfathomable "FUCK YOU" to his few remaining fans
Which fans are we talking about?
If it's a fuck you to us, then business as usual. He's been belting those out since Act 6.

If it's to the tumblr (forgive the buzzword) kids who seem content with Homestuck being transformed into a slice of life fanfic, then hell yes, bring it on.

>>87638668
it's a valid reason to hate here or tumblr but not a valid reason to hate the ships

>>87638649
>Dirk sounded like a sociopathic stalker while trying to get Jake to date him though
that was AR, and Dirk was only vaguely aware of what AR was doing to Jake behind his back

>>87638706
dirk is ar numbnuts

>>87638683
>That's pushing it.
He flat-out says it to Jane
http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=006489

>>87638025
Why does everyone assume that the kids should react to this shit realistically? The kids and their world aren't realistic. They never question their bizarre inventory systems. The kids see their guardians' insane behaviour as minor annoyances. John attacks his dad with a fucking hammer like it's nothing. Jade's parental figure is an omnipotent dog, and nobody even questions it. They run into tons of baffling shit before they even install sburb. These are not realistic people with realistic psychology. When confronted with worldview-shattering concepts like a game that creates a universe, they don't even make a joke about the theological implications. Why the fuck does everyone operate under the assumption that the kids are people who act like you or me? It's not even clear if they go to school.

This made the part about bro being abusive all the more infuriating. From our perspective, all the kids had horribly traumatic childhoods Jade's life is arguably worse than Dave's and she never complains once.

>>87638725
That's wrong though. Actually, let me explain this a bit.
1) AR is a 13 Dirk.
2) Put into a robot without human limits.
Fundamentally, they are the same. This is why Dirk says they are the same person and feels guilty for all of the fucked up shit he does- he could end up in the same way in his eyes.

Developmentally, they're different. AR is a robot. Robot can handle intense plans and always maintain a facade. AR is Dirk without limits. AR is the worst Dirk possible. This is why AR claims he is his own person.

Dirk's arc is not realizing AR is him. Dirk's arc is realizing that while he is not responsible for AR or Bro's actions directly (like he feels), they are a part of him that he needs to accept and work to change rather than suppressing it and hating himself.

So many people fundamentally misunderstand Dirk's character here that it's ridiculous.

>>87638770
does rose even go to school

>>87638753
But he also said that he likes Dirk and considered it besides that.

>>87638770
I could go through all of this but the end of the world is a bit much, Anon.
>Jade's life is arguably worse than Dave's and she never complains once.
Except she did.

>>87638578
Alpha session was Alternia
People mess this up a lot

Also I'll need evidence that Scratch was in the Beforus universe, I don't remember either. I always attributed Alternia's problems to being 100% Scratch, like he himself explained. The difference between a race being relatively normal and then the same race being batshit insane because of an unseen manipulators clever string-pulling was always a cool concept to me

Of course it could be like Condy, doing pretty much nothing in the human beta universe, then fucking shit up in the alpha. Maybe being in the beta universes were for research purposes for Condy and Scratch. Learn about them, then come back at the same point in time to use what they've learned to make the planet theirs

>>87638830
I don't remember. Some other Anon said something about that. I'd like to think it was a test-run though.

That's part of what I thought of.

>>87638830
in meenahquest the dancestors made references to lord english having influence in their universe and foreshadowed a bunch of shit but it never amounted to anything plot-wise

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>by shelby
So calli wore a dress while roxy wears the pants

>Once, in this very universe, you could say, Alternia was home to a peaceful race. Trollkind had never known the corrupting influence in their evolution which led them to perpetual war and violence.

>That is to say, they had never known me.

Yeah I don't think he was there

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>>87638895
which is slightly weird because Roxy has been a complete femm in all her stylings up until now

>>87638908
He could still manipulate indirectly?
>>87638866

>>87638770
Because from time to time, even in the early acts, they express very real and deep human thoughts and feelings about things. It's not unreasonable to speculate about their genuine thoughts on everything else about their reality

>>87638789
>So many people fundamentally misunderstand Dirk's character here that it's ridiculous.

Ya maybe it had something to do with the horrendously poor writing that made everything as janky as possible

>>87638942
Yes, and that needs a gentle, intelligent touch to make work when you have this sort of setting and comic going. It's not hard, but you do need to keep the tone consistent.

Hussie is not intelligent.

>>87638908
Did AR or ARquius ever interact with Meenah or the other Beforus trolls? Even if it's only implied, it would be a plausible explanation as to how Doc Scratch knows about Beforan culture.

>>87638949
>horrendously poor writing that made everything as janky as possible
Are you talking about the pacing, focus, non-linear direction, or what?

>>87638964
Uhhhh Scratch is a First Guardian he literally knows everything

>>87638924

The characters have become so indistinct they forgot wearing the pants was Rose's thing

>>87638961
But Hussie did that so he clearly was.

>>87638982
Other than the pockets of void sloshing around in his head, cough cough Equius, but you're right.

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>>87638977
All of it! Fucking all of it man did you read that slop? The pacing was DEAD along with absolutely any narrative tension or reason to care, it flip-flopped all over in a schizophrenia that couldn't hold up because the cast was so enormous and it took literal years to cycle back to a simple Dave/John chat, the focus got stretched into oblivion as a million side goals suddenly vanished in yet another disaster, and I could talk shuit to you for hoooourrrssss about how awful the writing became as everyone slowly slid into becoming flavorless soap boxes and contradictions that bored me to fucking DEATH.

>>87638683
>Jake was a boyslut and flirted with the idea of going out with everyone in the Alpha group. It definitely had some attraction.
That's pretty flimsy
>this guy went out with me because he'll literally go out with anyone
>proceeds to never express attraction to Dirk, they're just going out because they are
It's just a fact that m/m ships suck in homestuck

>>87638924
Eh, people like to experiment with styles as they grow up. But the more real answer: shelby

>>87638982
Even for alt timelines? Wait, Doc clearly knew about those with the bubbles, right? Then why weren't the Alphas more foreshadowed and shit?

>>87639041
>Eh, people like to experiment with styles as they grow up. But the more real answer: shelby

No that's fine and I like Roxy, but as a writer and designer you need to try to keep some visual consistency for it to not throw you off

Like all that was needed was a "Hey we got fitted for new duds how do they look"

>>87639047
BECAUSE HE MADE THEM UP AT THE LAST SECOND TO SELL MORE SHIRTS

>>87639041
No, it's not. Jake really did think of dating everyone.

He said he wanted to date him in the log I got sent. There was clearly attraction.

It was meant to fail which I liked.

>>87639057
>I like Roxy,
>Shit tastes detected.

>>87639015
>>87639047
I'm pretty sure Scratch doesn't know anything about universes where he doesn't exist, either. He might be able to see through Lil Cal though.

>>87639057
>The shirts meme.
It's time to stop.

>>87639081
That's how Cal was able to manipulate Bro, right?

>>87639027
Ah, so it was the pacing and the focus. I still think Dirk was one of the best written and just plain conceptualized characters in Homestuck. Too bad none of the other Alphas were good and none of them played off him well.

Even more disappointing is that all of these little details are lost on people and they just go "LE MANIPULATIVE DOUCHEBAG" meme.

>Homestuck update
I don't want more fucking fan content. Paradox Space was shit for a reason.

>>87639078
when you enter a homestuck thread you lose all right to disparage the taste of thers

>>87639081
Arquius could have passed through a fuckton of dream bubbles on his way to the Masterpiece, which would have included interacting with Beforan dream bubbles. That's the best I've got at this point.

>>87639145
Homestuck was good once. Roxy was not.

so that was it? That was all this big 11/11 update was?

Cool. I'll see you in January when Hiveswap comes out looking just as bad as the trailer.

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>>87639142
Hussie would never allow competent people with something neat they could do to make fan content, which is why they all left to become successful and happy

>>87639145
LEt him say what he wants, and ignore it. Who cares? There's nothing left to talk about, just lazy assholes shitposting out of sheer habit. I can pratically see him sighing into a cold cup of coffee as he tak taks out shit taste and feels a microgram of dopamine pop out

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>>87639188
>I can pratically see him sighing into a cold cup of coffee as he tak taks out shit taste and feels a microgram of dopamine pop out
You're not wrong, Anon. Not wrong at all.
Pic related: It's me as my bitch.

>>87639160
homestuck was never good

>>87639236
it fooled us with sound and fury, and when Hussie's speed habit dropped, he went full withdraw and the circus ended

>>87639236
>>87639252
WTF, I hate Homestuck now. (You left me with no choice, Anons.)

>>87638993
>homestuck having a consistent tone

>>87637798
the kids didnt care about all that because theyre all autistic like hussie and the entire fanbase
its relateable

>>87639374
It was consistent in Acts 1-4. Act 5 got a little iffy though.

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>>87638789
>Both Dirk and AR contradict this sentiment
>A major theme of the story is ultimate selves, as retarded of a concept as it may be
>But they're totally different, bro!

Dirk didn't have any responsibility for Bro, but he had every responsibility for AR because he is literally just Dirk. Not some weird offshoot, just Dirk in a different circumstance, and only exists because of Diek, by Dirk's own desire.

>>87639398
>>Both Dirk and AR contradict this sentiment
Again, AR manipulating Dirk. And Dirk taking too much responsibility for his alternate self. I even addressed this in my OP.

Also, I'm pretty sure ultimate selves only apply to alternate timeline selves and not weird "replicas of your 13 year old brain that grew up in a robot bot" selves.
No, AR is a different form of Dirk. AR Is a robot Dirk that started when he was 13 and grew up with zero limits and perhaps even guilt. Again, >AR is a robot. Robot can handle intense plans and always maintain a facade. AR is Dirk without limits. AR is the worst Dirk possible. This is why AR claims he is his own person.

Please make an actual argument instead of saying "they both said it therefore it's true"

>>87639398
>major theme
>Only comes in the last eight of the comic.

>>87639172
is this why hussie doesnt hire any good writers because he cant tell the difference between good writing and shit

>>87639461
His brain stopped working.

>>87639398
>>87639436
Also, isn't "ultimate selves" accepting that every alt self is just a part of your "ultimate self"? Doesn't that just help support the statement about Dirk's arc in my OP instead of your "they're just literally the same lmao"?

Is John going to spend eternity as a virgin?

What is Hussie's endgame for the character? Is he to be banished to isolation for having the audacity to be a heteronormative male?

>>87639503
He's going to become Lord English and then rape Rose.

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>>87639436
>They both say it, but one was lying and the other was being manipulated by the other. I have zero evidence of this, but it's true!

I don't need any other arguments, because it's in the mother fuckling comic. It's right there, it's canon. Not headcanon. Not theory. Two mother fuckers come together and independandtly verify the hypothesis. Nothing else needed.

And no, ultimate selves also includes dream selves, clones, robots, and everything else.

>>87639539
Two people saying something makes it true? Two people can't be wrong? And, again, AR is changed because he's Dirk without limits even if "lol ultimate selves" that means they're not the exact same. (And if they were the same, it'd mean it's just one person confirming it. :^))
>independently
AR constantly fucks with Dirk and especially with that- that's not independent.

And AR says he's his own person right before he "died". Do you have any explanation for that?

Again, you're not giving me any argument, Anon. You're saying "dur they both said it" and when I try to give you context and explain it to you, you give me nothing else.

Again, isn't "ultimate selves" still just >>87639492

>>87639539
You're really disappointing me here, Sexy Beast Anon.

>>87639602
Damn, I said "again" 3 times. Fuck this stupid Homestuck shit.

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>>87639602
Do you know what "ultimate selves" is about? Because it's not what you think it is apparently. Every iteration of a person is THAT person. As relevant and meaningful regardless of what path they took, because there some stupid horseshit that makes them all iteration of some core platonic sense of self. The differences of experience mean nothing, because it all stems from that "self". Both Dirks existing next to each other are the same person, with minor variation of iteration. The accomplishments and failures of one are the accomplishment and failures of all. Hence why it was somehow alright that Jade is always alone.

>AR constantly fucks with Dirk and especially with that- that's not independent.
He has literally never fucked with Dirk on that subject, he brought it up once in that very conversation, and Dirk instantly agreed.

>And AR says he's his own person right before he "died". Do you have any explanation for that?
No he does not. He says he is alive, and an actual person, and that killing him would be wrong for that reason. He then goes on to say he knows Dirk knows that as wrong because, hey, they're the same person.

>Again, you're not giving me any argument, Anon. You're saying "dur they both said it" and when I try to give you context and explain it to you, you give me nothing else.
I've given quotes from the comic, of all parties involved coming to consensus. You've given me broad theories based on interpretation and events that never happened.

Any sort of discourse on this is apparently impossible because it's just never going to get through. You're locked into to this theory, and that is apparently that.

>>87636937
fuck that, I don't have snapchat

>>87639681
>As relevant and meaningful regardless of what path they took, because there some stupid horseshit that makes them all iteration of some core platonic sense of self. The differences of experience mean nothing, because it all stems from that "self".
So there's literally no differences? What? That's stupid.
>Both Dirks existing next to each other are the same person, with minor variation of iteration.
But one's a robot and robots can handle intense calculations. This is the entire point of the character.
>He has literally never fucked with Dirk on that subject, he brought it up once in that very conversation, and Dirk instantly agreed.
No, they bring it up constantly. Hence the "trying to be the better dirk" thing when AR just IS a better Dirk (in the sense of being Dirk) which is why Dirk loathes him so much.
>No he does not. He says he is alive, and an actual person, and that killing him would be wrong for that reason
Saying "I'm an actual person" is just an indirect saying of "I'm not a carbon copy of you."
>He then goes on to say he knows Dirk knows that as wrong because, hey, they're the same person.
Wow, look, AR manipulating Dirk with guilt again.
>You're locked into to this theory, and that is apparently that.
Anon.... It's not a theory. It's a nuanced understanding.

>>87639697
The Snapchat stuff feels just so fucking forced.

Like Hussie sat in a room and asked what millennials liked, and that's what he came up with.

I might be giving him too much credit though, who knows if he even has any involvement in the story anymore.

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>>87639564

>>87639681
>>87639742
And what do you mean by "discourse"? We're having it right now. Can it only be "discourse" if I just agree with you?

>>87639390
right around where Horrorstuck started is when I started to feel like something was off with the tone

I hate hussie. I went to the only panel I think he's been a part of, where he was supposed to talk about the then upcoming Namco High. He said two sentences during that hour, it was mostly Kris Straub and Scott Kurtz talking about their Mappy show which was actually good and joking around. It was in a tiny room and hussie looked sad and depressed even then and his dad wasnt even died yet.

>>87639802
When was that again? And why'd you feel that way?
>>87639803
You hate a man because he's depressed?

>>87639817
>When was that again? And why'd you feel that way?
I'd say it starts when Eridan goes nuts and kills Sollux, Feferi, and Kanaya. I dunno, maybe their deaths just didn't have the appropriate dramatic weight or something. Like it was moving too fast.

>>87639742
>So there's literally no differences? What? That's stupid.
I know, but that's the comic. There's a reason everyone says ultimate selves is fucking retarded.

>But one's a robot and robots can handle intense calculations. This is the entire point of the character.
Not really. The more advanced calculations thing is only ever brought up as jokes and the one time Dirk gets pissed at AR for saying he's busy responding to Roxy. It's a facet, for certain, but it's not the "point". It's just another splinter of Dirk, doing as Dirk does.

>No, they bring it up constantly. Hence the "trying to be the better dirk" thing when AR just IS a better Dirk (in the sense of being Dirk) which is why Dirk loathes him so much.
Give me a single example.

>Saying "I'm an actual person" is just an indirect saying of "I'm not a carbon copy of you."
Not really, two perfectly identical clones with perfectly identical experiences, you can't just kill one because he's not an actual person while two of them are alive. This is obviously not that, but it's not a statement that hold any relevance. He has a living mind, that's all that statement implies.

>Wow, look, AR manipulating Dirk with guilt again.
He's scared shitless begging for his life, that's not manipulation, nothing implies any level of control or insecurity during the final moments of that exchange.

>Anon.... It's not a theory. It's a nuanced understanding.
See, this is the shit that I'm talking about. How do you even respond to that?

y'all gotta stop doing this bulletpoint style of argument
bulletpointing

>>87639852
Yeah, that sucks. It was just a plot device.

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post aradia

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>>87639953
nothing is post aradia because aradia is eternal