>"Well, /co/ do you wish to have your waifu to become

Can I get the Hell that's eating donuts forever?

>>87369541
"Does Anal and Sucking count as fucking?"

>>87369541
What if she rapes me though?

>>87369541
My girlfriend and I have the same waifu. I'll take you up on your deal and content myself to watch my girlfriend fuck her. Thanks a lot, Beelzebub, my friend.

>>87369541
pretty easy way around this, since she's muh waifu she will initiate with me every time, so she fucks me and I bypass your faustian bargain

>>87369541
A better monkey's paw would be getting a waifu that's still bound to the rules of their universe. Most of them would fall in love with you, but then "learn a lesson" that leads to them breaking up with you and then never acknowledging your existence ever again. So your waifu is always there but you're trapped behind a wall of narrative.

>>87369541
Joke's on you, Satan! I'm asexual, and so is she!

We'll be having a wonderful sex-free life together, thanks to your generosity!

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>>87369658
>>87369578
>>87369570
>"Foolish anons! Even if she seduces you and has sex with you and you acticly engage in it your souls is still MINE!"

>>87369656
>/co/
>girlfriend

You know, lying is a sin anon.

>>87370129
Sometimes I can't believe it myself, but I'm somehow not lying.

>>87369541
So, is it yours upon my death or the second I have sex.

Waifus are satans tools

It all makes sense now

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>>87370221
>"The second you have sex."

>>87369541
But souls are the simplification of the unique attributes of an individual's personality, memories, and actions.

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Your plan is to steal the soul of a hell lord more powerful than you?

Good luck

>>87370303
But we're still defining sex as penis into vagina insertion, right?

>>87369541
Okay, I bring her to life only for headpats then.

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>>87370299
>"Yes anon you figured everything out nicely. Now sign here. But careful hot pen."

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>>87370363
>"Yes anon! That also includes inserting your penis in any part of her as well. It's all here in this gosh darn contract!"

>>87370461
Does mutual masturbating count? We aren't inserting dick to hole here

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>>87370353
>>87370079
>"Well you got me there."

>>87369541
Why would I have sex with my waifu? She's too pure and chaste for intercourse.

>>87370461
So if I were to say, ask for a waifu with giant knockers, I could paizuri those melons all I wanted since it's not actually sex.

Just so we're clear on that.

>>87369541
You already had my soul, moron. Give me that fucktoy.

>>87370603
What this guy said.

Besides, I already know I'm going to hell so why would that even phase me?

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>>87369541
That's ok, I'm gay and my waifu is too pure to ever be fucked by anyone, let alone me. Easiest deal of my life.

>>87370461
What if I say my soul belongs to my Waifu.

What if my waifu takes my soul before you do?

>>87369541
That's OK, Mary Marvel is not for sexual

>>87369541
What if my waifu..... IS YOU!?!?!?!

What if my waifu is the devil?

>>87369541
Its already going to hell anyways. I have literally nothing to loose

>>87369541
Not like I was going to heaven anyways...

Satan, you sure you're an evil guy? I mean you're giving me a lifetime of happiness on exchange for nothing, since I am a Pagan anyways.

>>87373997
>since I am a Pagan anyways.
How doni get into that anyways? I was hurt badly by christianity, but want a mythology to believe in.

>>87374089
Find one that you like. I just use the term Pagan because I believe in multiple gods, based loosely on the concepts of H.P. Lovecraft (as in, the gods are essentially unknowable to our puny minds and don't care about humanity one way or the other).

What if my waifu...is me?

>>87370461
Wait, if I don't finish, then you don't get my soul, right?

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Funny story, I actually legally gave my soul to my waifu, who was incarnated by Vishnu.

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>an eternity of torture to invade Lum Invader
Ehhhhhhh pass. I think I could get a better bargain for my soul.

>>87369541
Hey, if I don't finish inside her, you don't get my soul, do you?

>>87370730
Who's your waifu anon?

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>>87377510
Hajime from Gatchaman Crowds