Hey there /co/, I'm your inner frat boy! What seems to be

My mom told me I was adopted right before she died and I'm feelin' really bummed out man.

I cried like a bitch to the ending of Lego movie.

Death endings? Meh. Endings of "you are a beautiful human bean" in a non romantic sence.... tear jeering for a manic depressed fool like me

im too shy to randomly start a conversation with a girl

>>87214695
I only pretend to have confidence. I'm terrified of interaction

I'm a lazy antisocial fuck

I'm addicted to porn. I can't stop fapping to it.

>>87214695

I'm going kill myself this week, so I decided, for nostalgia's sake, to do what I did back in high school.

Stay up late into the night drinking soda and browsing /co/. It's comfy as fuck.

>>87214695
I want a new purpose

>>87214961
Anon don't do it!

Oh no love! You're not alone
You're watching yourself but you're too unfair
You got your head all tangled up
But if I could only make you care

Oh no love! You're not alone
No matter what or who you've been
No matter when or where you've seen
All the knives seem to lacerate your brain
I've had my share, I'll help you with the pain
You're not alone

Just turn on with me and you're not alone
Let's turn on with me and you're not alone
Gimme your hands 'cause you're wonderful
Gimme your hands 'cause you're wonderful
Oh gimme your hands

>>87214695
I seem to have a mental condition that compels me to beat the shit out of anyone who isn't a straight white christian man on sight. Is there something wrong with me or is this perfectly normal?

>>87215174
You overdosed on redpills

>>87214800
I was too shy when I was younger; moved out, got a job, bought a car, etc only relationship I had was a 3 week stint with a furry girl on the rebound in highschool that went nowhere past a handjob. I don't even know where to start getting into a relationship in the real world, and fear its too late unless I want bar-hopping 30 somethings divorcees with 3 kids.

>>87215174
You might have the warrior gene variant, maybe do some research on
You know what? That's probably not a good idea.

>>87214756
Why would this bum you out? I never understood this shit. Most kids are accidents born from irresponsible, unprepared young parents who got stuck with a kid that they will probably not raise very well.

Adopted kids on the other hand were literally hand picked. Out of all the kids in the world, they were CHOSEN to be loved. They were prepared for, despite the fact that it's more difficult.

I was adopted and so is my daughter, because imo it's immoral to have your own kid when there are so many in need of homes. Adoption is the best fucking feeling because you and your kid are both broken, and it bonds you.

File: ht_wasco_clown_2_kb_141014_4x3_992.jpg (73KB, 992x744px) Image search: [Google]

73KB, 992x744px

>>87214695
Clowns are plaguing the nation. What should we do?

>>87215667
Arm yourself with seltzer and cream pies.

File: the_legend_never_dies__by_brotugueseviking-d6mywbm.png (2MB, 1600x2000px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 1600x2000px

>>87215885

>>87214756
Better than finding out that she's actually your grandmother, and your big sister is actually your mom.

That would fuck me right up, don't know how jack Nicholson and that one president did it.

>>87214881
This. Also I lack motivation.

>>87214695
All the thing's I use to escape reality are being ruined by corporate bullshit, and PC/SJW pandering, and justin beiber fans...

>>87215897
POWER UP THE BASS CANNON

>>87216023
>still complaining about Bieber
>in 2016
>even though he's mostly vanished from the public eye

Go back to 9gag or Facebook

>>87215667
Become the night

>>87216101
Easiest description to give for the kind of music that now rules the music scene, because of HORRIBLE people.

Could've used gaga, or beyonce, but I chose the example everyone could picture in their head, tone deaf teen girls who have put actual bands that use instruments into a near death state, because they are the ones who now decide what lives and dies with anything popular.

>>87216182
I feel like you don't know anything about music or the current state of music.

Either that or this is bait.

File: Destroy Us All.gif (92KB, 153x199px) Image search: [Google]

92KB, 153x199px

>>87215667
>Clowns are plaguing the nation. What should we do?
DESTROY 'EM ALL!!

>>87214695
I have ADD and it's not like the stereotypes at all. Sure I'm talkative and suck at being on time no matter how much I plan ahead but my mind thinks too quickly for the rest of my body to keep up with it. I'm almost always tired and I literally cannot relax. I can't even remember the last time I felt completely calm without worrying about something in the back of my head. I hate it and I wish I could be normal. I don't tell people this irl even though I'm obviously a ditz because I don't want them to coddle me or see that as all my personality is.


Also The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy was a hell of a good show and I've been meaning to rewatch it all for ages, but that's not really a problem.

>>87215225
As cliché as it sounds, it's never too late. My dad managed to find a gf after divorcing my mom when he was in his 60s, and they've been together for six years now.

I don't like to think the whole "there's somebody out there for everyone," because that's just not true, but I'm a firm believer in the idea that truth can be stranger than fiction sometimes. And that can be an awesome thing.

>>87214929
I dont see the problem

>>87214695
you can't just make this OP then abandon the premise

where are the jokes anon

>>87215225
Same thing, friend. I'm almost 25 and the most I've ever done with a guy is kissing. I just never really was into the people who were into me, and vice versa. But now that I'm wanting something serious I'm scared that men will see my inexperience as a turn off... so it's sort of a relief to see some dudes in the same boat.

File: Young Robotnik learns about agriculture.jpg (16KB, 369x365px) Image search: [Google]

16KB, 369x365px

>>87219031
Has anyone even tried the tangelo method at all?
I'm serious. Has there been at least one instance of a clown charging at someone only to fuck off once they see they're holding a tangelo?

Need desperately to quit my job. Going there makes me unhappy.

I thought about what I want to do instead, going to move to Las Vegas on New Years Day and be a bartender. It will be a change of scenery and the first time I'm truly on my own and out of the house.

But I'm frightened, very truly frightened, that I will still be unhappy when I accomplish my goal.

>>87220913
I think Billy confused tangelos with using a tomato.
If a performer is bad, you throw a tomato at them, that's what they're really afraid of.

Way I see it I got two more hours until I don't have to worry about mom calling and I'm in the clear, until Monday when it starts all over again.

>>87221093

Maybe, but tomatoes are soft and yielding, prone to splatting. You ever been pelted with oranges?

Right now I'm trying to finish some extra credit for my chemistry class but I keep stressing about our exam next week even though I finished some practice chapter tests and reviewing my homework. So my inner frat boy how can I relax?

>>87223127
Jerk off a lot.

File: Capture.png (90KB, 197x228px) Image search: [Google]

90KB, 197x228px

>>87223162
Haven't done that since 2014, next?

>>87216023
>>87216182

>le wrong generation

Please leave and never come back.

>>87214695
I need to sell some furniture before I move on Friday and I don't know what any of this shit is worth.

How much do I charge for a three seat couch? Or an armchair with a footrest?

>>87223186
Watch all of MXC.

>>87215225
>I had was a 3 week stint with a furry girl on the rebound in highschool that went nowhere past a handjob

Was it at least a good one?

>>87214881
>>87215968
These. Also I lack confidence.

>>87214695
I'm actually a frat boy who is a closet geek. If anyone ever found out I'd receive the hazing of a lifetime

>>87221453
>You ever been pelted with oranges?
God, I wish so!

>>87214695
Everyone's either a circler-jerker or a hate-filled mongoloid and both are ignorant morons who overreact at everything and taking it at face value. They don't think about what they see, they just believe it and share it, passing the ignorance further along. I know there's still good people out there but with each passing day my faith dwindles further and further.

Help me inner frat boy.

>>87225311
Stop visiting 4chan.

>>87225362
You and I both know I'm incapable of that.

>>87215606
>Adoption is the best fucking feeling because you and your kid are both broken, and it bonds you.
Plus you can fuck your daughter when she gets older.

>>87221019
I live in Vegas. Is there anything I could tell you about the area to help?

>>87214695
I'm suicidal

>>87215606
What would be truly immoral would be denying the gene pool my amazing gifts.

>>87214695
I can't stop jacking off to toddlercon hentai and furry porn.

>>87226709
Stop sitting at your computer all day bro

>>87215194
>>87215291
That's not even the strangest part. The weirdest part is that I'm a black lesbian jew.

>>87228640
Where else am I supposed to sit?

>>87228912
At a desk doing a 9-5 hour job.

>>87215907
What!?

>>87214695
WOW I DIDNT EVEN KNOW I HAD AN INNER FRRRRAT BOY

>>87228879
Wanna hear a joke?
A black man is sitting on the bus and reading a newspaper in Hebrew. A Jew walks in, sees him and says "Oy vey, as if being a nigger is not enough for you"

>>87226060
Hey anon, I'm gonna let you in on a secret. We're all suicidal here. Why do you think we continue going on 4chan? It's to help us forget about wanting to end that pathetic, miserable existence and focus more on what we grasp onto as a last ditch effort to somewhat blend into society's ever changing views on normality. One day my depression will get the best of me and I will eat a .45. But right now I've got to shit post about waifus.

>>87228879
>Black
>Jew

Statistically impossible, you're probably a black lesbian agnostic that attended a judeocentric private school or grew up in a predominantly Jewish neighborhood.

In other words, you're a dirty SoCal rat-bastard.

I want a new dildo.

>>87214695
Inner frat boy, I want to party hard with this one chick but I feel like she's turn down the party

What should I do?

>>87214695
I had sex with my half sister and am deeply regretting it.

>>87216251

Hey man, I listen to the radio and thats the only way to get music these days.

I changed my Steam name to Bane, changed my profile pic to match, set a bunch of key binds to say GMOD-appropriate Bane quotes from the Nolanverse movie. I was gonna get on a GMOD sandbox server with some friends and build a plane. We were gonna go through the plane scene, and I'd eventually shout "crashing this plane... WITH NO SURVIVORS" into the mic and crash the plane into someone's build. But my friends lost interest in GMOD, so now I have nobody to do it with

>>87214695
I'm working two jobs and balancing school as well to pay back (on my own decision, it's not a demand) someone who could care less if I'm dead or alive.

I'm just feeling bummed and tired, how do I work up the strength to keep moving.

>>87223431
This. Also I lack integrity.

>>87230651
What is this a Japanese anime or are you in the Deep South or the deep New England?

I've spent so much time feeling sad or neutral that feeling happy and satisfied is alien and almost uncomfortable.

>>87234923
Midwest. White trash on one side.

>>87215667
Stalk up on Tangelos?

>>87221093
But Tangelos are the only thing that messes with there ribulrioum.

>>87216055
THINGS ARE ABOUT TO GET LOUD

>>87223127
Remind yourself that stressing out only makes it worse on your test, and also remember that cramming is pointless, study 24 hours before the test and get a good nights rest and it will stick better to you.

Also remember that in the end grades are pretty pointless unless you intend on going hard on your schooling and go to college,unless you're already in college, in which case it won't really do much for you unless, again, you go hard and become a high achiever.

>>87235005
Watch the Muppets

>>87214695
I can't stop browsing /co/.

>>87229109
>>87229183
What do you call the bastard child of a nigger and an octopus?
Fuck if I know, but it sure as hell can pick some cotton.

File: 4chinz banner.png (32KB, 878x135px) Image search: [Google]

32KB, 878x135px

>>87225463
18 years in paint.

File: 1477277152167.gif (3MB, 309x313px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 309x313px

>>87215085
byootaful.

>>87215907
10/10

>>87214780
everything is awesome

what is this /adv/?

>>87215907
my childhood best friend is like that but everyone knows but him
Sorry Gavin

He's Back!

File: sports.jpg (283KB, 1654x1554px) Image search: [Google]

283KB, 1654x1554px

>>87215085

>>87230464
Try Amazon, last time i ordered one there they gave me free 2 day shipping even tho i didn't have prime. Decent selection and the box didn't reveal what it was

>>87232448
Be proud of what you have accomplished, and look forward to a better future.

File: billy jewsdid911.jpg (24KB, 480x480px) Image search: [Google]

24KB, 480x480px

>>87220913

>>87236310
Ah, the Woody Allen technique.

Well things are working out (family's helping me get back into college and I'm out looking for work almost every day)

just wish I had better friends than I do. i'd also really like to find another nice, relatable gf after cutting it off with the last one 6 weeks ago. without so much as lifting a finger or speaking in anger to any of these people they've just up and burned their bridges with me for stupid, silly reasons. one of my closest friends doesn't even live in this state anymore and a different friend is still around after 5+ years even though we hardly get along and always argue.

basica i'm a lone wolf with a clear conscience and a lot of determination and want to feel a little less alone and have a little more guidance than just what's innately moving me forward.

File: 1459849979731_1_0.jpg (46KB, 480x480px) Image search: [Google]

46KB, 480x480px

>>87214695
Whenever I do something good, I antagonize myself over what I could have done to be better. It's weird and it sometimes gets to the point where I'm on the verge of a panic attack.

File: 1476278226831.jpg (216KB, 587x734px) Image search: [Google]

216KB, 587x734px

Whenever I feel like I'm truly happy I start to cry.

>>87239799
Tears of joy?

>>87240175
M-maybe?

i had too many pistachios

>>87215606
>it's immoral to have your own kid when there are so many in need of homes.
this is why europe is dying

File: theraven2.png (101KB, 473x346px) Image search: [Google]

101KB, 473x346px

>>87239799

DO NOT CRY!

File: zuke.png (94KB, 996x1141px) Image search: [Google]

94KB, 996x1141px

>>87214695
I found out that Lauren Zuke, a storyboard artist for Steven Universe, identifies as "non-binary." I'm afraid of people who are different.

>>87214756
I don't understand why parents hide this information
When i was a child my parents told me that I was adopted and I never had issues with it


also, this >>87215606