ITT: I dump lockhorns comics where Leroy interacts with bimbos
It's the same joke every time
Why do they have duck feet though
This is a depressing comic
it's just about a couple that hates each other
why haven't they gotten a fucking divorce yet holy shit
>>78707401
>why haven't they gotten a fucking divorce yet holy shit
The artists have discussed this.
If they got a divorce the comic would end and nobody wants that
Holy shit this guy is shit
>>78707401
why are the lockhorns so small
>>78707406
The camera angle really adds something to this one
>>78707437
>If they got a divorce the comic would end and nobody wants that
I want it.
Is she his wife or sister since they look the same?
>>78707587
do travel agencies still exist?
Meh, I'd fuck Loretta.
>>78707401
Loretta knows that she's too old for anyone to want her, so she clings to the only thing she has even if he's garbage. Same for him, really. Neither enjoys life, but neither wants to die alone. Source: 40 years of observing my parents.
>>78708874
Sick burn.
>>78709593
>>78708874
I don't understand.
Do they have kids?
also related
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wRP6egIEABk
>>78707262
This is much more amusing than that unfunny heathcliff spamming bullshit
>>78709738
She doesn't read books, she reads tweets. 140 characters is the most she can handle. At least, that's the implication.
>>78710340
You take that back.
>>78707901
There was a grocery store that I went to that had one.
>>78707944
Same here. I'm an ass man anyways, most of these bimbos ain't got nothin' on that shortstack rump.
Would you, /co/?
Does this guy use a template?
Because this guy recycles poses as much as early Buckley.
>>78711312
You'd regret it immediately afterwards.
>>78711322
Calling it, Loretta's a transdude.
>>78709738
She is old and doesn't have a Twitter, and is genuinely curios and ignorant about how Twitter works.
>>78707291
I remember reading this one.
Did they ever do the opposite gag?
>>78711380
But you'd make her year
Why is his upper lip serrated?
>>78711312
Fuck yeah I would.
what did leroy see in loretta in the first place?
Despite his baldness and his wife's snide remarks, Leroy seems pretty popular with the ladies.
>>78711553
Back in the 40s people were often set up by their parents
>>78711585
They like that he can party.
Women irl are like this too they always fawn over old guys who like to party and have a good time
>>78711613
Old guys who can party are pretty cool. Especially ones who can legit dance.
>>78711659
Back to tumblr female
>>78711181
i don't get it
>>78707262
I was going to make a quip about the writer having problems in the home. But first I decided to wiki it up and...
>Author(s) Bunny Hoest and John Reiner
>Bunny Hoest
>"Be careful," Ms. Hoest said. "I'm just writing what I see. It's based on observation."
Now I don't know what.
>>78711729
Its a joke saying shes going to punish him after the party
>>78711312
Yes pls
>>78707406
Look at her face. She's miserable, and resigned to the fact that her husband doesn't love her.
Meanwhile, he smiles at his wife's misery.
>>78711726
You just mad that I can style allover you with no effort.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dADkQGzDOAg
>>78707577
It makes it clear how drunk he must be to perceive reality that way.
>>78711758
>thought lockhorns ripped off the brothers chaps
>didnt see the edge of SB's head
>>78709738
I think it's because Leroy can't say anything witty unless it's something he read off the internet.
The tall women don't seem to mind him. Or are they just being polite?
>>78712011
>The Lockhorns takes place in a future dystopia where blank-faced fembots prowl the countryside unopposed, seeking out men to seduce and enslave. This is the story of one woman's attempt at keeping her husband from falling under their power.
Christ, this thread is depressing.
This is like the part 2/3 through every Daniel Clowes book where the characters are self-loathing failures who just fucked up. Except it never ends. It's just that low over and over.
>>78712203
I'd watch a movie of that
>>78711853
holy shit
get rekt kid
this is like if /pol/ got a girlfriend in sunday comic form.
>>78711391
a...transmale? I dont think you know how that works anon.
>>78707262
>>78707291
>>78707310
>>78707328
>>78707353
>THIS UGLY MOTHERFUCKER IS BANGING HOT CHICKS, AND BASICALLY YOU ARE FUCKING STUPID!
>>78712011
Apparently leeroy is just really good with the ladies. He's got some sweet dance moves at least, he always gets a girl to dance with him. Also he appears to be one hell of a smooth talker >>78711726
>>78712807
wow, that is like the magnus opus of jokes there. It includes a fucking simile
so.. all these people hating on Leroy, maybe you should hate our society's absolutely stupid bullshit concept of marriage and monogamy. I'm sick of defending my desire to fuck young women all day long every day. It's what I was born to do, what all straight men were born to do. It's on our DNA.
>>78712568
holy shit one of them actually talked
>>78712498
of all the dumb "chivalry" traditions, this one makes the least sense. How the fuck does it help anyone to throw a coat in a puddle? It doesn't make the puddle easier to traverse at all....
>>78712011
they're just people, anon, as long as you don't act rude or smell bad they won't mind you either
>>78713122
It's moving in for the kill.
>>78711927
this is actually funny
>>78707692
Shit man...thats cold.
How does this short, bald son of a bitch keep landing 10/10s? In front of his wife, no less?
>>78713789
She looks more supremely pissed off in this one than in any other panel
Normally I don't like old man/beautiful young girl smut, but I'd pay good money to see Leroy plowing all of these bimbos
The only thing that would make this strip worse is if they had a kid somehow
>>78707262
loved these
when i was a kid i use to cut out the ones that had the 'hot' bimbo ones. thank you for posting all of them.
hopefully a lot more
1. Why did this guy marry the hawaiian punch guy.
2. Why the fuck is she so jealous while she is constantly saying nasty shit about him to her friends?
>>78713970
I swear some of these pictures are just copy and pasted with different colors.
>>78711667
Okay, that one is actually pretty funny.
Which is never something I thought I'd say about the Lockhorns. Like, ever.
>>78711824
Half of the strips are Leeory making Loretta miserable, the other half is Loretta making Leeroy miserable.
That's probably literally all that's holding their marriage together. Making each other's lives miserable is the only thing that brings them any joy.
>>78714247
The whole thing is a satire to what married life is seen in it's late years
It was a very common cliche in the 70s up that the man would have a midlife crisis and would skirt chase/flirt while the wife would seesaw between bitter indifference and passionate disapproval over the whole ordeal.
>>78712661
Wtf? How is that different?
>dude=male
This guy is the reason feminism exists.
>>78708727
I know it's heightened cartoony art emphasizing how dumpy and age-shrunken the Lockhorns are, but in this one they look like they are actually dwarfs.
>>78713144
It's sacrifice. It's saying even if it doesn't help I would give up my coat for you, that's how much I love you. It's supposed to be romantic I guess?
>>78707262
Jesus Christ what an asshole!
This is the kind of toxic masculinity that keeps women away from comics, god why hasn't this trash been banned already?
>>78708790
What is she saying?
>Married couple who don't enjoy being together
Wow how original
>>78720966
Comfortable first world women being butthurt at trivial nonsense like shitty one panel comics? I agree.
>>78707401
This was literally all American humour from the 1950's until the fall of the wall.
>>78707901
They're actually super useful if you're planning a huge trip where you want to plan a week's worth of activities at a time, but most of the time it's a lot more efficient to just book stuff yourself.
>>78707262
So is this Leroy loaded with money or is he some record mogul or movie producer or why are all these hot women giving him the time of day?
>>78707291
Why is his mouth like that? Is it trying to be a mustache?
>>78713144
The only thing I can think of is a situation in the olden days where a woman's dancing shoes might have been made of silk or some other very delicate material, which would have been ruined by the shallowest of puddles, and if a coat was of thick material it might have been enough to soak up the puddle / provide enough bulk to be able to step on without ruining the shoes.
Otherwise, I have no idea either
>>78713851
Apparently he lies to them a lot, based on Loretta's paycheck and or monopoly property comments.
And also is a wild party animal, which they apparently find amusing
>>78727796
Why do women wear impractical footwear? I had an argument with two of my female co-workers who were moaning about how sore their feet were after wearing heels the previous night. I suggested they wear something comfortable and they just went "NO BUT THESE LOOKED REALLY NICE. YOU DON'T WEAR COMFORTABLE THINGS ON A NIGHT OUT. YOU JUST DON'T GET IT" I agreed I didn't get it then went and took painkillers for my rapidly forming headache.
>>78727914
Beats me, heels were originally meant for guys anyway.
>>78727914
It's a style question. Women's outfits, when not relaxed tomboyish style, are meant to look stylish and elegant or whatever and have a "total look". They're often also more varied or colourful than men's fashions, which tends to follow the same "suit and simple, classic colours" year after year. So women's style look also encompasses the shoes, and sometimes having shoes that fit the style and look "good" is valued higher than wearing comfortable shoes.
High heels also make your legs look sexier.
So, unfortunately, really often comfortable, practical, weatherproof footwear gets branded as frumpy or sexless, while it's the impractical, gorgeous, delicate-details footwear that's recognised as sexy, stylish etc. It's a question of values; are you ready to pay the price of looking stunning or not?
Personally I try to avoid uncomfortable shoes because I like to be able to walk well and long if I need to, shoes that make your feet literally bleed after 30 min of walking are such a pain even if they'd look awesome and complete the outfit. But then, I often look a bit frumpy anyway.
>>78728108
I wish more women wore steel toe caps, ratty jeans, and frayed sweaters.
Why am I so attracted to garbage
>>78728108
In addition; colourful statement piece footwear can be fun though, even if it's impractical. I for example have a pair of flats (thank god, they're comfy) made of embroidered silk I got in Venice, and they're gorgeous and mint-green and it's true that with this specific summer frock it's just a different feel than if I'd wear sneakers or sensible black leather shoes with them. But since they're silk, they're really, really delicate and easily ruined.
So in a way, women's shoes are just not for walking, they're a much more integral part of the "look" than men's shoes. They can be considered similarly important as the jewellery, for example.
Men's style is also usually more classic, simple, and understated.
>>78728193
Yeah "sensible shoes" really have a sex-killer stigma. Among other women even, it's like the mark of a woman who's given up on finding romance and caring about her looks. Or possibly a dyke. Definitely they don't carry this feeling of a sexy, attractive, glamorous woman who's living life to the fullest.
Which is a damn shame because uncomfortable shoes are so horrible
>>78714154
I have over 600 of them on my computer
>Look at this failed, loveless marriage! Isn't that funny? LOL!
No. It's depressing.
>>78710340
I can't say I agree. Heathcliff is entertaining because it's "humor" is so alien.
This is just mediocre.
>>78728651
http://lockhorns.com/comics/january-7-1996/
heres an archive that has every lockhorns comic ever made
It has all the ones that don't have a bimbo in them
theres other jokes
>>78728718
Heathcliff is like that Monkeybone movie, you only like it because its horrid humor has been driven into your skull for too long
>>78724154
Or they could just, I don't know...
Fucking walk AROUND the puddle!
Is the middle one about domestic abuse or what
>>78728915
No Loretta is a bad driver
>>78711312
Even that seems too curvy.
She looks more frumpy in the comics.
>>78729106
Holy shit Mrs. Lockhorn, don't make jokes. Call the fucking police. Leroy's been assaulted and raped by Michael Jackson.
>>78727757
I always took that is being drunk since it makes him look a bit sloppy.
>>78728108
>High heels also make your legs look sexier.
No, they just look fucking stupid. Instant turn-off.
>>78711769
Isn't it a hair piece joke?
>>78712962
Then don't get married and lie to someone. No one's stopping you from fucking these young women. Don't get married in the first place!
>>78708727
Loretta's pretty qt I don't give a fuck.
>>78731738
get fucked leroy
Why did you save all these? Why did you start a thread for them? Why are you doing this to us? Why? Why?
>>78736035
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSNeL0QYfqo
Can we convince Dustin to do some Loretta Rule34?
>>78728651
Is she saying he should kill himself?
>>78727914
It's cause heels tense up the legs and ass making them look dynamite
It's hot
>>78737504
nah shes "being a good wife and preparing a nice hot bath for him when he gets home"
>>78734177
fucking cultural appropriation, this shall not stand
>>78738189
I really hope you're being ironic
>>78736035
Because the bimbos are fap worthy
>>78728511
600 of just Leroy being a drunk womanizer? Christ, how long has this strip been going on?
>>78738878
It's not just that. These are just the ones I saved from the website
Here's a joke that doesn't have a bimbo in it that's semi 4chan related
>>78742131
if he can get two chicks to go home with her, why wouldn't he just divorce her?
>>78742293
this comic could be about that dude and his long suffering female roommate
>>78708850
Should've said "pacemaker."
Loretta should gawk at hot men in counter of Leroy's womanizing.
>>78712942
>can't make them ahegao just from conversation
>>78713144
You know what is also in a puddle? Mud.
>>78713144
I'm pretty sure it was always a cartoonish exaggeration. I can't imagine anyone actually doing that, even in the middle ages when everyone was retarded. Maybe an insanely rich noble with a million coats might do it.
>>78739008
What a fucking asshole hahaha
>>78741146
The hate sex must be killer.
>>78743026
>Bbc
Oh boy, OP gonna make a new /co/ waifu out of Loretta.
How many fucking parties do they go to?
>>78744869
The only reason they stick together is that they have been robbing rich people for so long they only trust each other.
>>78707262
That looks like one of the JAB Comix milfs.
Why do the two characters look like a different style than all the background characters?
>>78745114
Sharonas mom specifically
>>78742625
I'M DOC! DOC! D-D-DOCTOR DICK!
Why do the Lockhorns party with so many sluts?
>>78707401
You ever listen to The Mountain Goats?
These are great OP, thanks for sharing!
>>78707901
I live near a small one, seems to still be open.
The moral of the story: Even if you're a balding, middle aged, short, fat, and ugly man, freakishly beautiful women will always be willing flirt with you, but if you're a frumpy middle aged woman you're garbo.
>>78707485
Catholicism doesn't forbid divorce, just remarriage after divorce.
>>78747513
You sound Salty
>>78708896
Because Olive Oyl is fucking ugly...
>>78746020
Leroy probably drags Loretta to them
>>78710197
Dumping a bucket of water on him while he's talking to the beautiful women is a really good way to help you're husband get laid. Especially since he clearly has game, if all these other panels are any indication.
So from what I understand, the wife... hates him completely and unapologetically... and wants nothing to do with him... But she still cockblocks him at every turn.
Just let him cheat on you and then you get half the stuff in the divorce.
>>78711312
I kinda got a thing for older women, so yes
>>78746861
>tfw driving my mom to the airport and no children starts playing right after my dad walked out on her
>>78732316
>Loretta
>qt
Someone has low standards.
>>78713768
Is she embarrassed that he could get laid without her? What does she have to be embarrassed about? She makes it seem like she's embarrassed to be seen with him when she should be embarrassed that he could fuck whoever he wants.
>>78725022
The joke is that hula dancing is actually 'telling a story', so Loretta's implying that the woman's dancing is saying incredibly lewd things, presumably.
>>78713144
It's not supposed to make sense. It's literally intentional tryharding, doing something ridiculously over the top that makes no sense in order to show that you're so madly smitten with the target of your affections that you'd throw away sense and your own comfort/belongings to spare them even a moment of discomfort.
It's a very deliberately performed bit of stupidity, in the school of chivalric romanticism.
This comic was referenced once in a strip of "Lio"
>>78744398
I didn't know comic strips can't say "hell"
>>78743026
>>78744316Are you anon's sure about this?
>>78749473
On order
>Get Fuzzy
>Lockhorns
>Funky Winkerbean
>Lio (the comic itself)
>Can't remember
>Dennis the Menace
>Beetle Bailey
>>78749680
its baby blues
>>78749701
Thanks.
You notice that these two are tsundere between eachother.
It is beautiful.
>>78747513
>The moral of the story: Even if you're a balding, middle aged, short, fat, and ugly man, who dresses up nice and pretends he has money, freakishly beautiful women will always be willing flirt with you
Fixed.
>>78749654
What do you think, shit-eyes?
>>78727914
It's not just women's footwear. My favorite looking sneaker is the Jordan 1, which offers about as much support as a thick pair of socks.
My comfy walking shoes that feel like I'm walking on air look completely geriatric.
Form or function, y'all.
>>78742573
You made me chuckle anon. Thanks.
>>78738402
He just doesn't give a fuck, now does he?
>>78749654
I wanna to see more.
>>78707672
>>78707692
You're a short, balding fat fuck Leroy. Don't talk to your wife like that. Why do you expect her to put up with your shit?
>>78707401
Welcome to real life.
People are idiots and their actions make zero sense.
>>78753181
Leeroy gets off to the thought that he could sleep with attractive 20 year olds, his wife gets off to the thought that she's still more attractive than the 20 year olds cause he still fucks that old dusty puss at night.
>>78754080
I get the feeling they're one of those "haven't had sex in 30 years" marriages
>>78713967
I'd like to see that plus some cuckquean angle worked in. Loretta is secretly into it.
Also, I know these comics can't be 100% bimbos. What are the rest? Her nagging him to do chores?
>>78747520
My dad was excommunicated for divorce. u:
>>78754632
Yeah basically, or just being snippy with each other about this or that
>>78713281
Ha.
>>78707401
This
even when I was a little kid reading this it just depressed the hell out of me and I barely understood it
this and Andy Capp, what a bunch of fuckos
>>78754632
>Loretta is secretly into it.
no way it's a secret
all she seems to do is complain about his ways, but never divorces him. She is definitely into it. And just look at all her "friends", completely tired of her shit, they know her complaining is all pointless
>>78757266
Ohp Image limit
>>78757355
why did he marry his troll wife if he was going to be so miserable? is he stupid? peer pressure? her wife's family was rich?