Why are you still ordering Chinese when making your own is cheap

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>>9366098

>why do you herp when you could derp

My stir-fry and fried rice are never as good as restaurant quality.

Guess you need a super high BTU commercial stove and giant wok.

>>9366098
dont have a gas stove so its impossible to replicate what an actual restaurant can do.

>>9366098
Because sometimes I just wanna get high and not leave the couch

>>9366098
Cooking takes like half an hour, and Chinese tackout takes like a minute to order
It's not how long it takes to arrive in my belly, it's how much time I could be doing other stuff
Yeah like playing Xbox or rubbing one out among other things

It takes fucking forever to make enough chicken balls for a meal

Implying that battering and frying chicken, making your own sweet and sour sauce, using a thousand utensils, washing up, opening windows to get rid of the fry up smell is easier than ordering from mr Lee a few metres away from my house.

Also tell me how you cook such a large variety of foods easily, as I like my chow mein to be accompanied with chop suey, sweet and sour chicken, egg fried rice etc

>>9366146
the secret ingridient is oil
>>9366158
>eurocuck
>>9366167
just make a bunch anh have a tupper in the fridge labeled weed munch, you wont even nottice its reheated when you are high
>>9366176
do you think that the mexican slave working the kitchen takes half an hour to make it? get good
>>9366181
i clean as i cook, at the end i only have the plate i ate from dirty
im pretty sure you can buy the sweet and sour sacuce from the super market
>>9366181
egg fried rice takes five minutes too make, chow mein is just noodles with sauce, you can buy fresh packged udon and boil it for two minutes and finish it in a wok with vegetables fried over high heat and some sauce, i dont make chop suey since bean sprouts are only sold in massive bags and i barely have any use for them but yeah, all that shit can be made pretty fast

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>>9366098
well, i can pop down to the local bakery and get a plate of this for $2

tried making fried rice once tasted like ass
chinese food is something you need to leave to the professionals

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>>9366244
>the secret ingridient is oil
digits of deception!

>>9366403
its still oil
>>9366373
you need to remove the starch from the rice and leave it on the fridge for two days

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>>9366098
UMA

>>9366271
One plate is meant for an entire family...

Is this why white people are fucking fat as fuck on average?

It's the same fucking reason I don't cook all that often. It takes too much time, and there's a huge amount of waste for me unless I want to eat the same damn thing day after day after day.

The other Chinese place a couple of miles away will bring me a single meal for myself with another meal of leftovers, and the whole thing costs me $15. I don't have to go to the store and pick out ingredients that will go bad, look up recipes, and clean.

I have a real job so I don't have to freak out about saving money.

>>9366146
This. I cam't get the flavor right much less able able to cook rice correctly in the first place.

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>>9366098
MELON
E
L
O
N

>>9366244
Look at this fucking tryhard. Makes his own for questionably higher quality and takes several hours and a fuckton of work to do it. Meanwhile Jane Rottencrotch can order it and have it delivered in 30-45 mins with it being equal to or maybe slightly lower quality than homemade (assuming you have the skills for that in the first place).

>>9366480
wrong

>>9366146
Probably just not using as much oil or salt. The reason why restaurant food tastes better than home cooking is 9/10 due to the homecook not using nearly enough oil or salt.

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>>9366516
Even just his posting style, quoting everyone and their brother seems pretty tryhard imo

>>9366098
But I already do. Also why did you cheat on your wife?

>>9366146
You need a carbon steel wok, high smoke point oil, and hot temps. Oh and the magic ingredient, MSG.
MSG is amazing and makes everything just dandy.

If vegans aren't using MSG, they're fucking retarded.

>>9366271
hnnggg those things are the goat chinese food

Chinese food isn't hard to make. Just read some books and start practising.

>>9367284
Nobody on /ck/ actually cooks.

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This seems like the right thread to ask, but why is imitation crab/fish cake looked down on so much? It's cheap, and tasty.

>>9366098
What is this game called again?

>>9367629
Outrun: Spaghetti

>>9367640
Fuck off

>>9367547
it is probably the same bad wrap that imitation cheese gets

>>9367629
facade

>>9366373
I'm half-Chinese and sometimes I cook Chinese because chicks love that. My mom taught me some tricks and she doesn't even own a wok since she mostly cooks European.

It's really about oil. I don't even use MSG (I usually pour in some "light" soy sauce).
Also you have to move a lot, never let your rice sit on the pan, let it dance all the time.
And I'd even say that it's also about the rice type.

>>9366411
>oil
anon, you have a weird idea of what corn is

>>9367679
imitation cheese is trying to be cheese and failing
"imitation""""crab""" is just normal asian fish sausage with a red stripe painted down the side for some reason

>>9367817
i never had any corn in chinese food

>>9366098
I dont want to clean 5 pans for shitty drunk food.

>>9366098
>and a monkey could do it?

I do cook my own Chinese. But I think part of the problem is that doing a proper stir-fry is one of the trickiest skills to learn in the kitchen. Because of the insane heat levels involved the timing is very critical. That also means you need to be good at eyeballing ingredient amounts because you don't have time to measure.

Any retard can stick stuff in a frying pan and pour "stir fry sauce" over it. But that's not getting you anywhere near restaurant-quality stir fry.

>>9368126
just keep everything you need near you faggit

>>9367837
what do you think they make MSG out of?

>>9368126
Is prepping before you begin not a common practise?

>>9366146
Defibitely need that MSG. You can buy some in powdered form from the grocery store, or you can use a dash or two of fish sauce. Be careful with that stuff though, it's flavor is extremely potent.

>>9368713
Since you're adding small amounts of things including liquids which shouldn't mix beforehand, the amount of bowls you'd have to have stacked up quickly becomes unfeasible. You can probably get away with it cooking for one if you have a dishwasher, but it's completely impossible in a line environment.

Where to start..
Get a wok.
Get a cleaver.
I have an improvised burner works on charcoal and a blower on a foot switch.
Books are great!
Knowing real Chinese people is better.
I have about 5 or 6 sauces in bottles.
Msg and 5 spice.
Nothing you guys quoted as food is actually Chinese.
Wonton and dumpling skins you can get at any asian store.
I'm not Chinese!
If I can do it you can probably do it better then me!

>>9368813
What's a good Chinese cookbook then?

A lotta people ask me stupid fucking questions
A lotta people think that what I say in the kitchen
Or what I talk about in the kitchen
That I actually do in real life or that I believe in it
Or if I say that I wanna cook something, that
I'm actually gonna do it or that I believe in it
Well shit, if you believe that, then I'll cook for you
You know why? Cause I'm artisanal

>>9366480
>Be non-white
>Perpetually undernourished as a child
How tall are you, be honest?

>>9366480
three thin crepes filled with a bit of vegetables in meant for a whole family"?

Maybe in north hkorea.

I didn't eat both plates by the way, you dim3i

Do you know how long it takes to raise a child?