>ordering food online >order 2 people's portion so

imagine being a full grown adult and not being able to cook your own meals

>>9254317
I live in a food dessert and ran out of food

>>9254293
>Being this scared to be who you are so you choose a life of fatassery

>>9254393

What do you mean?
No stores in a 15 mile radius?

>be me
>living by myself
>really fucking want KFC
>kinda poor, need to justify it
>decide to get a family meal, eat for a few days
>drive up
>get extremely anxious
>make up fake family names so that it seems more realistic
>say shit like "Well, Jenny loves mashed potatoes, but Tomas will want coleslaw while ordering
>they never even knew

>>9254393
>I live in a food dessert
yeah i'm sure you do tubby

>>9254419
How many pieces of chicken do you have on your first plate?

>>9254438
I ended up getting the bucket with mashed potatoes and coleslaw and biscuits. Ate lunch for four days (coleslaw didn't keep at all threw out most of it desu)

>>9254448
The biscuits are the best, right? I like dipping them in the gravy.

>>9254468


Nothing beats a Popeye biscuit, however I will admit that KFC biscuits are quite good.

>>9254470
What's your favorite meal to eat biscuits with (besides KFC/Popeyes)?

>>9254481


Specifically fast food or something home made aswell??

>>9254493
Either or... hit with me your dream meal to eat with biscuits

>>9254507

Chicken fried steak
Smashed potatoes
White gravy
Buttery delicious biscuit
Mac and cheese

>>9254416
Nearest supermarket is 30 miles away, I usually stock up once a week but I ran out this week.
There's only one overpriced vegan organic gluten free hipster store nearby

>>9254516
Fuck I want that to be my last meal with an ice cream sundae or chocolate cake.

>>9254538

I recent had homemade Peach Cobbler with vanilla ice cream and I wanted to marry it

>>9254293
>Order large pizza and sides
>"Feeds 3-4 people"

Fuck off nob eads

we always know

people who are getting food for many people are more hurried and a bit giddy to bring the food in

people who are alone are comparatively and very noticeably lonely

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>buy way too much food for one person
>after i close the door yell out food's here even though im the only one at home

>>9254293
>order 2 people's portion so the delivery guy doesn't think I'm a loser
are you sure it's not because you're just a fat fuck

>>9254317

>No one is allowed to eat out

Fuck off

>order single-serving portions of food for me and my japanese gf
>eat it all myself
>skinny japanese gf survives only by eating my cum and drinking my pee

I actually don't give a fuck. I ordered from the pizza place literally 5 minutes walk away because I didn't want to stop watching breaking bad.

>>9254293

The delivery driver knows that you're going to eat both of them as your fat ass opens the door, avoids eye contact as you mumble your gratitude and push some money into their hand, and then shut the door and waddle away clutching your food.

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>>9254393
>tfw you'll never live in a comfy dessert

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>order 2 people's portion so I get free delivery

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>>9254293
>>9254607
>>9254618
>>9254690
delet

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>>9254293
we can tell that you ordered it all for yourself

>be delivery guy
>fat chick that lives in a small side house attached to another house is a regular
>first time I delivered to her I rang the doorbell for the main house.
>it's 10pm, some guy comes to the door cursing and tells me "she's round back"
>go round back and see dozens of pizza boxes piled up near the trash
>knock on door of what looks like an air conditioned shed
>massive landwhale grill answers the door, quickly takes both pizzas, hands me cash, and closes the door

stop making it so obvious guys

>>9254403
not op but people don't care for who I am and its best to go unnoticed than be persecuted

>>9254293
Used to be fat before I found /fit/, now I'm just gay. You are an amateur.
>order 2 very different medium pizzas
>order your soda and shout 'what do you want to drink?'
>order your second soda
>shout 'foods here' while closing door on delivery driver
>now they don't know or care

With any other kind of food, just pretend to ask someone else anything they ask you ie sides, what they want on it etc.

>want to eat fast food
>it's expensive so I don't

>>9254393
Let me guess, neet living off autism bucks.

>>9255486
you must be joking

>want two people's worth of food
>order first half inside
>order second half in drive-thru

>>9254393
>not donning your traveler's cloak, well shod boots, and sword to make the trek to the bazaar at the oasis
>not procuring strange and unusual foodstuffs from the hooded traders of the mysterious caravans who deal not in coin but in stories and memories

>>9256151

it is, since I'm a NEET without an income right now

>>9254293
no one cares dude. This is more a reflection of your poor self esteem than it is on any real expectation for how much a delivery driver cares about your life. Order what you want, commit to maintaining (healthy) habits so your mental health improves

>>9254419
The fact that you think minimum wage fast food workers give a flying horse turd about what you order is more retarded than the facade you created

>>9254618
>buy way too much food for one person
>have music playing or some movie/tv on quite loud. maybe the delivery guy will think there are more people in the house when I answer the door.

>>9256277
I was a NEET without an income and I could afford a pretty big meal from a number of Fast Food places. It's VERY cheap

>>9254293
>not greeting the delivery guy on the porch wearing nothing but boxers and a shoulder holster while your loud moeblob anime is echoing out the door
>not giving him a 20 for a single 12 dollar pizza, winking and saying "keep the change"
you're a fucking pussy

>so the delivery guy doesn't think I'm a loser

he's likely a grown man who delivers food to peoples' houses for a living. I'm pretty sure he's a bit preoccupied with his own lack of self-worth to be thinking about yours

>>9256261
he's right OP, get to it