>order a "party sub" at the deli >I'm

>>9149708
It's not like subway asks

>anon what's the occasion

They are franchise wage cucks.
Also party subs taste better than civilian subs

>>9149708
>buying 6 30-racks of beer
>"heh, going to a party?"
>I'm not going to a party

>>9149708

>order a Happy Meal at McDonalds
>I haven't been happy in 4 years

File: sadwojak.png (10KB, 216x233px) Image search: [Google]

10KB, 216x233px

>>9149708
>order a double cheeseburger
>I'm not 2 people

>pop a totinos "party pizza" in the oven
>grimace at the irony
>head back to my room without speaking to another person all day

>buying foodstuff
>have low self worth

>>9149770
lol I feel ya

File: alpha male.png (231KB, 438x537px) Image search: [Google]

231KB, 438x537px

>>9149757
>order 2 large pizzas
>clerk says "looks like you and your friends are having a pizza party :)"
>respond "actually, they're both for me"
>but secretly you're buying them for your friends' pizza party

>>9149895
Mom's gonna freak.

>>9149895
LOCK ME UP

File: e2a.jpg (47KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

47KB, 500x500px

>>9149708
>order a "Happy Family" at the chinese take out place
>My wife hates me for forgetting her birthday for the third time
>Her son still calls me Kyle

>>9150009
Get me some egg rolls Kyle.

File: 1498964873110.gif (2MB, 400x267px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 400x267px

>>9149757
>make my grocery store run of the day
>it's another "anon buys a handle of bottom shelf whiskey and some tallboys" edition
>cashier says "h-have a good night, anon...."

>>9149770
>ever having been happy
Think I've only really ever felt true joy on election night last year.

>>9150166
P. gay tee bee aych.

File: booty booty.png (388KB, 777x504px) Image search: [Google]

388KB, 777x504px

>call myself a chef
>dont actually cook food

>eat a dozen "king sized" chocolate bars in one sitting
>live in USA land of freedom, no monarchies here thank you very much

File: burburger_0.png (410KB, 394x553px) Image search: [Google]

410KB, 394x553px

>Buy a box of cake mix, a pint of icing, and some streamers from the clearance rack
>"Having a little party?"
>Make a weight gain cake shake, tie myself up with neon streamers, and eat the icing off of a plate like a swine
5'11" 140lbs btw

>>9150135
why did I laugh at this?

>>9150301
How exactly would you "tie yourself up"?

>>9150304
running a DEX build atm

>state tax on on eating inside the restaurant
>order take away
>sit down at table after receiving food
>avoid tax
>dirty looks from chinks all around

>>9150316
you're drunk tee gee

>>9150319
Say *what*

File: noose.jpg (242KB, 800x563px) Image search: [Google]

242KB, 800x563px

>>9150304

>order chinese food
>have to spend at least 25 dollars for them to deliver
>buy enough chinese food to feed all the children working in factories in Bangkok
>end up eating chinese food for breakfast the next day

>>9150350
Were you not satisfied?

>>9149838
Did you leave it in the oven?

>>9150506
Under rated

>>9150135
>and some tallboys
Why