Sup /ck/, let's discuss terrible restaurants in your town

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>>8818792

>>8818792
>Pasta de Cum Sauce

Bullshit. Post their Yelp page.

Here where I live in California a 'California Style' pizza place opened up and their menus and flyers and shit proudly stated that they only used the finest Wisconsin cheese on their pizzas. They were closed in about six months.

>>8818792
Az?

>>8819367
so they're supposed to use california cheese or something inferior? I don't get it

>>8819407
>Hey guys, come to our authentic French restaurant and eat food we sourced from New Zealand!
Are you dense? How do you not understand the issue?

>>8819367
California style means in the style of california. N9t necessarily sourced locally from California. That being said, I'd be fucked to tell you what California style pizza is.

>>8819521
As far as I can tell it's just thin-ish crust pizza with toppings which probably shouldn't be on a pizza. Never really cared for the stuff.

You gotta be pretty daft to use Wisconsin cheese on California style pizza being served in California, though. We're kind of proud of our cheese over here.

Vermont makes better cheddar, though, I'll admit that.

>>8819495
Look at this:
>>8819521

>>8819535
Alright, that makes sense. It isn't like Wisconsin is known for their excellent buffalo mozzarella, I will give you that

>>8818792
Calling major BS

>>8819568
It is. I remember this exact same thread years ago.

>place called Wild Berries
>they had this massive restaurant, I mean really massive building out by a bunch of hotels
>painted all bright colors like lime green, lavender and hot pink, like some 80s vomit disaster
>go in once with roommate to see what it was like
>menu was massive, like ten pages of Denny's-tier foodstuffs, just greasy spoon shit
>order some omelet with hashbrowns
>omelet is hard, hashbrowns are soft
>roommate's food isn't good either
>we're the only people in the entire restaurant although they had the potential to seat like 300 people at a time or more
>owner/chef comes out and asks if we'd like to try a complimentary piece of pie
>say yes, begin looking at the dessert menu, at least 30 types of pie on it
>he comes back with two pieces of pie we didn't order
>it's some kind of pineapple goo pie with a coconut meringue on top, graham cracker crust falling apart, it's not very good at all
>he says "it's like a pina colada pie, but with pineapple so it's tropical"
>don't have the heart to explain to this dumb old man what pina colada means
>leave
>never come back
They closed after about four months.

>>8818792
I've got one:
>Cafe Gratitude
>Organic/
>Raw
>Vegan
>Fruitarian
>Before every order you had to say what you were grateful for in life
.>Hippie servers
>Never remembered what you ordered
>last 3 months in my town

>>8819535
Californians are scumbags

>>8820038
I'm a gratarian but even hat is going too far.

Dick's Last Resort
Only it's not closed.
www.dickslastresort.com

>From the website
DICK SEZ:
"Hope yer hungry, Sucker! From lip-smackin, fall-off-the-bone ribs to buttery fresh crab legs,
our kitchen pros will fill yer gullet with the finest ingredients this side of wherever! We've got
Ribs, Chicken, Seafood, Burgers, Sammiches, Appetizers, Salads, Desserts, and all the Booze
you could ever use! Go ahead and loosen yer belt 'cause yer Bucket O' Good Grub is served!"

>>8820109
ehh, it's a gimmicky tourist restaurant. i've been to the one on the riverwalk in san antonio. they gave my sister a hat that said "the blonde is fake but the dumb is real" so whatever, had a good chuckle.

>in Brazil
>self service "chinese BBQ" place
>no chinese food, only BBQ and some kinds of sushi... (also tipical brazillian food)
>owners are actually Chinese...
>everything tastes the same... LITERALLY the same, with exception of the rice, even chicken, the sushi and the pig tastes the same... some weird taste like old oil...
>cheap and dirty...
>revisitted the city again last month, its still there... I didnt go in but I could smell that old oil smell from the goddamn door...
>the place is always packed...

>>8820038
Berkeley?
The food orders themselves were things like "I am blessed"

>To Go, a burger joint near a high school in LA
>Run by Armenians
>Food is pretty good, but more expensive than the nearby Taco Bell
>Takes forever to get your food, so there is nothing To Go about it
>Lasts maybe a couple months before being replaced by Tub's Fine Chili, which is based

>>8820038
Literally still open in Los Angeles

>Rainforest cafe

>>8820038
Christ, I hate California now and I'm liberal. That restaurant needs to implode from their own absurdity.

>>8820439
Those Californians can be a bit much. Good thing there are so many kinds of us.

>>8818792
>a restaurant recently opened up in my town last year
>it's basically like a coffee-shop but they serve cereal instead of coffee
>about $8.00 for a bowl of trix and some strawberries
>parking lot has been empty since the first couple months
They haven't closed yet but I wouldn't be surprised if they did.

>>8819495
So Youre the kind of faggot that would complain at a french resturaunt because the truffles come from Italy?

Kill yourself nigger

>>8820468
>French restaurant
>no French salad dressing
>no French toast
>at least they French fries
>check the ketchup...it's Heinz
The fuck is this shit?

>>8819828
You're from chicago and thats a chain of resturaunts.

>be Canadian
>live in bilingual town with majority French population
>Frenchies will support any French business regardless of how shit but boycott anything not owned by french local
>rumor has it two French families that own most of the property in town raise rent on any non local business
>shitty family restaurant is in business for years
>they serve shitty versions of popular dishes from these type of places but for a higher price
>shit like nachos but topped with pizza cheese, green peppers, tomato and bacon or a club sandwich with turkey cold cuts and walmart brand tier bread
>restaurants and other businesses give up trying to move in
>all wondering why the town's growth has drastically slowed down and local businesses have no traffic
>restaurant owner throws fit outside town meeting about the big bad Englishmen going into the city to eat good food and abandoning the town
Moved out of there recently, good riddance

>>8820546

desu, Quebecois are truly a different bread of citizen...Anglos spend money on houses and interior fixings while Francos spend all their cash on going out and cloths...

Stopped in on a buddy of mine in Montreal a few years back...he's got a new Yaris, yet a mattress on the floor, no table or chairs and a shit load of milk crates...

Guess he ate well and was up with all the latest fashion though...

>hippy place in the closest 'city' that serves only juice, toast, and sandwiches
>around $10 for toast with hummus and goat cheese on it
>food is all right but I could make it just as good at home without emptying my wallet
>juice I could make in the blender
>have dumb names for everything and actual call sandwiches "sammies"
>takes forever to get anything and they barely use hairnets
Still open to my knowledge.

I worked here, for reference I live in a fairly small town
>raw vegan takeout place
>had like 15 glass jars of things like dried dates and nutritional yeast and usually 2 small entrees that always looked wet or burnt and you were supposed to make a boxed lunch out of that.
>the owner\chef would ask people if they ate non raw vegan food or if they vaxinated their children and then yell at them until they left if they said yes.
>closed in about a year when the owners husband stopped paying for it because she ran off all the regulars and it would stay empty for days.
>the entire time she was open she only made about $1000 in sales.

>>8820546
>>8820571

t. butthurt anglos

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>cajun restaurant called "Gator's"
>gimmick was they actually served alligator
>am cajun so i looked forward to having a place like this near me
>the gator was just fried nuggets and was super expensive
>the only other supposedly cajun food was gumbo
>it was even "dark" gumbo
>but not really
>it was basically just a veggie stew and tasted like they just tossed a packet of instant gravy to make it "dark"
>the rest of the food was grease and salt based
Fucking white trash appropriating the term "cajun" acting like it applies to them.

>>8819521
Wait too much avocado in everything makes it California style

I live in a bible thumpin', rural, Alabama town. Local golf club announces alcohol free policy. No beer in snack bar or dining area. New menus decorated with crosses, fish symbols, and bible verses. 6 months later, file for bankruptcy, reopen under new management, and lotsa booze. Even Baptists want their likker.

>>8820546
>nachos but topped with pizza cheese, green peppers, tomato and bacon

Fuck you, pizza nachos are GOAT.

Although I did grow up in a shitty town (American south) that was being strangled to death by the Town Fathers who owned the local (shit tier) grocery store, used car lot, and so on, and refused to let anyone else into town.

Not a restaurant, but in my town we had a bar that was called #thebar. They lasted about 2 months.

>>8821339
>haha bro you know how people always say "the bar" when talking about like any bar? why don't we just open a place called "the bar" it will for sure be a hit

>>8818792
Nice repost, faggot.

>>8819300
their closed. Yelp page prolly isnt up anymore you dub piece of shit

>>8820067
and we all moved to colorado. Now colorado is fucked.

>>8821350
I used to go to a place called "the pub"

>>8821350
Get this. The place is called Country Boyz now, and it's a fucking black bar. Small town, USA is fucking weird.

>>8821357
>boolean search for Big Dick Burger
>only result is this thread
Put this at the top of the list of things that never happened.
Google and Internet Archive cache Yelp, btw.

There was a short lived bar called the Bull and Bear Tavern. Trying to be a high class white collar bar in a blue collar town. Funny story, the bar was sold and soon was a known gay bar. They didn't have to change names. But again, even that was short lived

>>8818792
WHAT THE FUCK? I'M THE GUY WHO ORIGINALLY POSTED THIS. I'M THE GUY WHO ACTUALLY WENT TO JACKASSES. I THINK I EVEN USED THAT IMAGE IN THE OP.

>>8818792

Could you at least start threads like this with an original story, instead of stale pasta?

>>8820571
having a car is nice, id probably get it before furniture too if i had to choose like that guy

>>8820571
>a new Yaris
Whoa, I bet that guy is loaded.

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>>8821452

>>8821214
I really don't get the hate you canadafags have for quebecois. When I bummed around the US for a couple of years the quebecians that were vacationing here that I hooked up with were always good folk. It seems to me like you canuck tribal anglos have the same kind of attitude the coasts have to flyovers, no?

>>8821433
>Bull and Bear Tavern
wut

There's a Bull and Bear Tavern near me that's a 10/10 comfy british pub with insanely cheap food and great beers on tap.

I suppose that's a common name.

>>8821269
kek. I know the feeling. They rail against the sin of drink and gambling, but go to a Mississippi casino at 11:00 A.M. on Sunday and count the number of hypocrites dressed in their sunday best pulling the slot arm and swilling free liquor. How can you not be cynical nowadays?

>>8820109
When our ship pulled into port in Baltimore, all the BM and deckfags insisted we hit that place first.

Food was okay, drinks were great. 6/10.

>>8820546
Which hick town are you from? Sounds like a town near Montréal.

>>8821357
Yelp keeps shut down restaurants in their database for years.

>Based bar and restaurant named Elishas gets sold
>replaced by some shitty chinese place lasts a few years
> Another Chinese place goes there
> Lasts like 8 months
>Yet another chinese place goes there
> Doesnt last long
> Now, another restaurant is there, its a "Chinese/American" place
>They have Chinese food, plus "american" food like Nacho's, burgers, etc.

Its not that bad desu.

>>8821269
The baptists think it's pure evil here, regardless of underlying illnesses, general behavior, problems it helps you solve.
I sit at home alone and drink beer and never got in a tiny bit of trouble. Yet I'm still hiding from the entire baptist church at the age of 26 because they will disown me for a 12oz can.

And they all drink and eat opiates in secret. That's just a fucking fact. Their game faces all include coming to church pissed off their faces and then bitching about drunkards.

It's an evil I have to deal with. I don't join these conversations. I have lupus and can't take opiates, I'm fucking thrilled to have a beer and then lay on my couch and rot. Fuck the baptists.

>>8821433
lol my friend worked there

>>8818792
There was a place in my home town for a while called "nomz", which served "traditional American food" which consisted of burgers, hot dogs, diner breakfast plates in the mooning, etc.

Whether there once and the service was mediocre, not awful, but not great either. The food on the other hand was shit. I had a cheese burg and fries, the burger was a wet mess that feel apart when you started to pick it up (I ended up eating it with a fork) and the fries were cold soggy steak fries that I just didn't eat.

Never went back after that, don't remember how long it was open.

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>>8821660
Dude, you really need to tell them that. I know, I live in a small town in the south (gag), but when those smarmy fuckwads knock on my door, I tell them to fuck off and if they're not off my property in 1 minute they'll be dealing with my hounds from hell (pic related).

>>8820038
>>8820439

Isnt that place run by the Landmark cult?

>"Our Best Restaurant"
>Southern throwback old people shit
>Everything was fried or smothered in gravy
>Apple sauce was at least 50% cinnamon
>Meatloaf tasted like gravy
>Cornbread was so greasy you literally drank out of it like a sponge
>One big fucking room full of round picnic tables and shit
This was 9 years ago but I remember this experience so vividly, must have lasted about a year or so, the chain still exists but I would not recommend.

>>8821704
>cornbread
>greasy
what the fuck

there is always a vacant restaurant space in the shitty mall we have in our small town and whenever a new place starts up it's closed within 6 months. i assume they close down because they suck ass and i think the last one was charging quite a lot for what was shit food at best.

>>8821251
>People will never know the feeling of sadness seeing "Cajun" themed restaurants outside of Louisiana

It's a literally waterboy tier mockery. I make it a special case of mine to go in with my thickest drunken accent, speaking half shit French and try some food, while looking extremely disdained the entire time you eat. Those fucks left the shells on the shrimp in my poboy once. Fucking Yankees. God forbid getting anything like.gumbo, you already know it's gonna be watered down bullshit.

Next time I go I'll ask for possum blood or some shit. These fucks won't know I'm mocking them.

>>8820109
>>8820123
I don't get this place, like sure it could be funny but it sounds annoying as fuck. Why would I pay people do debase me?

>>8821722
>People will never know the feeling of sadness seeing "Cajun" themed restaurants outside of Louisiana


On the other hand, when you do find a good cajun restaurant outside of Louisiana, it makes it all that much more impressive and satisfying.

It is depressing that the good ones are so rare. Hell, even the best ones usually hit or miss on a menu item or two.

I have yet to find a place that can serve both good red beans and rice and good etouffee. it's always one or the other. and don't get me fucking started on the god damn state of jamby our boudin outside of Louisiana. What a fucking disaster.

>>8820546
Sounds like NB

ghetto sf bay area townie as fuck hick suburban location. we have a Mexican restaurant, burger place, Italian dinner and some fast-food. pizza place closes down an in its place is a 'hot dog shoppe' . me and whiteheads buddy were smoking weed n picking up beer one Tuesday morning and are like "what's this place? and walk inside , there's like hotrod photos all over the walls, 50's style booths and an 80y.o lady I. a poodle skirt at the counter. I look at the menu, it was hotdogs and nothing else so I walk out, wtf. never saw anyone in there or ever heard anyone talk about it. the next time I came back home it was gone

>>8821547
Jean your grammar is slipping through

>>8821722
Calm down ignatius

>>8821825
Lel, I'm unironically american. And my true experience interacting with a number of quebecois has been positive. They must like travelling, because everyone from canada I met in my extended journey around the US was from Quebec. I like them. They always seemed like decent folk to me, but I don't have your ingrained tribal prejudices about them. You also don't have the ingrained tribal prejudice I have against niggers, so I guess we're even. If you met niggers travelling in canada, you'd probably think they were good folk too.

>>8821374

Don't forget Washington State, now it too is fucked.

>>8821251
i ate at a place in Pinedale Wyoming just like this

>>8821357
>Dub
Was that on purpose? Because he did get some nice dubs

>>8819521
Judging from other dishes with cali in their name, either vegan/vegetarian, outlandish amounts of avocado and exorbitant prices for the food.

>>8821660
>Yet I'm still hiding from the entire baptist church at the age of 26 because they will disown me for a 12oz can.
Why do you care if a religious community you're not part of "disowns" you?

>>8821762
I grew up near Beaumont, Texas. Plenty of great cajun places, plus everyone knows how to make it good at home. I grew up on my dad's gumbo and etouffee. Just had a big crawfish boil two weekends ago.

However, this is only incidentally because I lived right on the border of Louisiana, so I guess the point stands.

>>8822680
Also from the Golden Triangle area. We're basically Louisiana anyway so that barely counts.

The was a food cart near my house in Queens six or seven years ago that sold "food".

I paid $5 for a styrofoam container with cold rice and rock-hard meat of some kind, there may have been vegetables underneath. I don't think it had a license to sell anything and was just there squatting, it was so sketchy I was too scared to ask for a refund.

>>8821762
>>8822680
I live in Austin, there's a few places to get good cajun food here.

I've have crawfish 3 times this spring

>>8819521
Look up the menu from a place called "Mellow Mushroom". They kinda go insane with the specialty weirdo topping assortments. They're pretty good, though.

>>8820453
Is this in Britain somewhere? I remember a news article about that.

>fish store
>not a restaurant, just a place to buy fresh fish
>fish gradually gets less and less fresh
>store starts preparing meals
>eventually starts preparing completely irrelevant shit like burgers and pasta
>by now fish is secondary
then they get a second wind
>stop doing shit with prepared food
>go back to pretty fresh fish
>and ice cream - not good ice cream, really bizarre and obviously artificial ice cream
If you've ever had "frozen dessert treat" that refuses to melt even under near-boiling water, it was like that shit with flavored syrup on it. They didn't last more than 2 months after that started, nobody wants ice cream when the smell of moderately fresh fish hits their nostrils.

ended up being replaced by a delicious, proudly inauthentic mexican/tex mex restaurant that has stayed in that building longer than any previous store

>>8818792
I posted about this when it happened a few years ago.

> live in somewhere in big city Asia
> some dippy kid decides to start a vegan pizza restaurant
> announces how it'll have only vegan stuff
> nothing for anyone else, just vegans
> vegan fake fucking cheese even
> I figure he'll last six months tops
> four months later he posts a going out of business sale
> I buy some stuff off him dirt cheap
> it's all in perfect condition, looks like new

Felt a little bad for him because the stuff was so nice and he sold it so cheaply, but seriously, how stupid do you have to be to try to start a restaurant based on forcing an unpopular dietary preference on the customers?

>>8823160
What Asian city? He probably could've gotten business from Buddhists if he marketed properly.

>>8818792
Lighten up jackass

>>8818792
Oh, and another one. Keep in mind, Asia.

> some guy starts a high-end German restaurant
> I try to find it, can't
> turns out it's in the middle of nofuckingwhere
> have to drive forty minutes out of the city
> it's in a row of commercial buildings that have zero parking anywhere near them
> literally facing onto a high speed main road
> back of building is a beach
> I get there a week later
> wedge my scooter onto the front entrance
> he's already permanently shut down
> says he has no money to keep it running
> was literally expecting to post a few mentions of it on an expat bulletin board and have customers flock in from miles away
> that didn't happen
> he isn't even going to try to keep it afloat until he develops a customer base

Like, Jesus fucking Christ, did you plan this out?

>>8823169
Taipei.

Yeah, there are some vegetarian restaurants for Buddhists, but the rules aren't merely "vegan", they cannot eat "warming" foods which means no onions or garlic. And the Buddhists do allow animal-based food, just no *meat*.

Vegan cheese? Ain't nobody gonna eat that shit voluntarily.

>>8820109
Is this at all related to Dirty Dick's Crab House in NC?

Ordered a massive hamburger because I'm a glutton: probably 1 lb of ground beef, bacon, onion rings (on the burger), barbecue sauce, 4-cheese blend, lettuce, tomato, pickle. Comes with fries on the side. Called the Galaxy Burger or some shit like that (because it'll be going past Uranus! Hyuk hyuk!). Around $18 in total. Patty comes out still pink, send it back to have it cooked some more.

Safe to say, they don't serve that anymore. At least they comped the burger.

>pre 2008 Obama administration
>Mediocre plates of food and poor sevice
>at least they know how to pour beer right
>20$ plates of food
>2008 recession hits
>same restaurant has relaunched 4 times already with same owners
2017 and its still medioce
>>8821928
>If you met niggers travelling in canada, you'd probably think they were good folk too.

I nearly lost my shit laughing in the library

This place called begonias by my house.

The food actually was amazing most of the time, but there was no centric theme with food from all over the world, the place was named after a fucking flower, it was like 15-20% too expensive and the decor was 1960s knockoff european restaurants with local college art put up on the walls (although the art was generally nice, it didnt fit at all). I actually loved going there, and could tell the chef knew what he was doing, but he desperately needed a manager or someone who know what they were doing outside of the food. Every time I went I was the only one in the restaurant, it was kind of sad really.

Although for the year it was open it was my go-to place to bring girls I had over the night before from brunch/lunch, and they always liked it because we'd be the only ones there and the food was good.

>>8821547
Because they are whiny little cunts who want to separate but still use Canada's natural resources like a real province

No one likes them because of their shitty attitude to anglophones

>>8821214
Learn a real language please

>>8821168
amazing, I've cooked at some shit places but that's just incredible

>'Gastropub' opens up near me just as my area begins to gentrify
>Every pint is like a fiver plus (pub next door is two quid a pint)
>They serve what on the face of it should be great food - Skate wings, crab linguine, good burgers and steaks etc etc and the pub classics ofc
>Except it's all terrible, it's like they've gotten the ingredients all together but brought in someone who has never cooked before in their life to try and put it all together.
>Lasted just shy of a year
>Shame as they did have some nice ales on tap
>Now it's a Taiwanese 'street food' place
>Fuck hipsters

>>8820123
fuck i went there about a year ago
>a buddy took me there, me not knowing it was an insult restaurant
>the dude realized I didn't dig the whole yelling at customers things, whatever that just me
>we ordered some beers, server asked if we wanted to get the tall, take home novelty cup, the beer was 50% off after paying for the first beer and extra for the cup
>whatever fuck it, we order it, and only get 1 more beer each
>i got shitty bud light or some piss water cause its always cheaper and i don't drink for the taste when the selection is crap
>the bill comes and the first 16 oz beer plus the cup is $15
>our bill was $60 for an appetizer sampler thing and 4 beers
I was so pissed, at myself too for not asked about the jacked up prices beforehand
The take home, novelty cup were just 20 cent plastic cups with a Dick's sticker on them
I think the server knew he talked us into something we weren't ready to pay for, he kept reminding us that more beers were cheaper after the first novelty beer trying to make us feel like we got a good deal

>very large restaurant space in a somewhat poor area near my parents house
>in between a mcdonalds and a wendy's and two garages
>has been an asian buffet with canadian food (so sweet n sour chicken balls and lukewarm pizza and french fries)
>almost once a year for 24 years it changed ownership or management and sometimes had renovations done to spruce it up, sometimes just barely changed the name and signage but advertised being under new ownership.
>24 suckers fail to do the same concept in the same spot in 24 years
>finally became a storage facility

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>>8818792
>His hubby doesn't hate PC culture

This thread reminds me of a club that opened up near my apartment a few years ago. The area is flooded with bars and restaurants and with a uni down the road I guess the owners thought an 18+ club would be a great idea. Tried to make it midscale with an outdoor patio area. Unfortunately it the equivalent of putting lipstick on a pig when the club is attached to a gas station and behind a hot dog joint.

Last time I was at that convenieny store for a pack of smokes the doors were wide open and who I assume is the owner was sitting at the bar, alone, watching football on a tv. I think it's a vape shop now.

>>8819367
california style : too much goat cheese and made by illegals?

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>>8821251
>be from WA
>cajun relatives come by for a reunion
>make gumbo for them since I figured they'd appreciate it
>they say it's as good as the stuff they have back home
how do you even fuck up cajun stuff anyway?

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>generic sports bar opens up in nearby strip mall
>only redeeming feature of said strip mall is a papa murphys
>have to park in the ass end of the parking lot to pick up my pizzas because the fags at the bar take up the entire lot with their prisitine lifted f350's

>>8821168
>>raw vegan takeout place

so, the grocery store?

>>8821660
>And they all drink and eat opiates in secret. That's just a fucking fact. Their game faces all include coming to church pissed off their faces and then bitching about drunkards.

They cant reconcile their beliefs with their behavior, so all that shame and self-loathing is projected outward. Exact same thing and exact same reason you see so many people so vociferously talk about the evils of homosexuality, and end up getting caught sniffing coke off the dick of an underaged rentboy.

>indian restaurant opens
>it's really fast food grub like samosas, curries and naan pizzas
>the entire joint is run by a single very hard working Indian who runs back and forth from the kitchen to the ice cream bar to the front till because...
>...half the restaurant is also a corner store so you can buy batteries etc (you can even order this shit delivered)
>one day order some food for delivery
>ding dong
>it's the same fucking Indian guy driving delivery

it was open for maybe a year

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>>8821660
>>8823812

>>8823789
Ahaha.

Reminds me of the raw hippie shit in my old town. Newest place to pop up was some cold pressed juice bar selling 10oz bottles at $9 a pop. I would stop by for coffee and they would always push the buttered coffee. I just want a black coffee, maybe some honey added thanks.

The whole place seemed to want to promote a super healthy lifestyle but everyone was so far up their asses the delivery came off as douchey. Oddly enough they still sold beer.

>>8820038
still open all over

>>8823767
>how do you even fuck up cajun stuff anyway?

with gumbo, at least:
>not cooking roux long enough/too long
>wrong spices/not spicy enough
>not using holy trinity
>not using file powder
>wrong sausage
>only one or two types of meat
>served over mushy rice
>gumbo isn't thick enough

in short, there are a hundred ways to fuck up gumbo

>>8823864
yeah, but if you have a vague idea of what you're doing it's easy
>make good roux, nice and brown
>add in the trinity
>add stock
>add meat (I like sausage+shrimp+crab)
>add spices
>let it simmer for awhile
>cook rice
>serve over rice
>add file powder to taste
real fuckin simple

>>8822670
I'm a part of it because I would be dead without them. I filter the baptist bullshit because there is little to filter, just the threat of burning in hell, which every other religious sect seems to disagree with their god wanting to do.

The reality is that I rent a house from them and it's game over if I get caught treating my own illnesses. They are drunkards and stoners that explicitly tell me not to be one. It's fucked up on every level to condemn a man with lupus who wants pain relief without resorting to synthetic drugs or opiates. There will be retribution for their condemnation of my own solutions, provided we don't just black out and go in a hole in the ground. You can not tell a man he should not find solutions to his own pain and then eat oxy 5s in front of him, which one of the pastors does.

>>8823812
I agree, they can't make sense of what they're doing themselves and it gets projected onto me. They don't bother me at the house but they won't hesitate to make me homeless if I'm caught on the porch drinking a single beer.
The last time they asked I was honest, and not so alcoholic, I told them I had a single beer given to me 4 days prior and I happily took it so as not to waste the products of human effort. They all gasped at my admission. I was fucking pissed.

>work at a mall
>some chef comes in and opens an authentic Spanish tapas and paella place at the location a taco shop just closed down
>he repaints and redecorates the entire place
>hands out flyers to all the mall businesses
>big grand opening
>the place was closed in 2 months

>>8823880
You'd be surprised how easily the average person can fuck up a straightforward recipe. If it were that easy, everyone would be a good cook.

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>>8823905
>literally follow directions
>it turns out fine

>>8823911
Right, and it really isn't that difficult for me either. However gumbo has about 4 or 5 steps more than an average stew recipe where it's possible to fuck up, and for whatever reason some people have a really hard time following directions.
Just like some people have a hard time reading a map; it' weird but a lot of people lack critical thinking skills they should have developed at a young age.

>>8820038
>Before every order you had to say what you were grateful for in life

>Well, I guess we no longer have a nigger for a president, now gimme my coffee you degenerate dope smoking hippys.

>>8823911
>literally follow directions

There's the tricky part for most people. If you've ever had to fix a relative's technolgy issues, you've probably realized that relatively simple shit can seem daunting if someone is outside of their comfort zone/area of competence. Replacing a stick of RAM is literally a three minute operation with like, five steps, but give those steps and a desktop to a 70 year-old and it's like asking them to defuse a bomb.

>>8823946
Replacing a ram stick does not take 3 minutes dude. Unless you count windows vista tier startup times.

>>8820486
they surrendered their selection to a superior country

>>8823960

>Arbitrarily chosen single digit number representing a short period of time

>>8823982
You're clear, I was just saying. If you know where the sticks go..
Your point stands however.

>>8821701
is it bad that the first thing I assume is that it's a chinese related post before I read the post

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>>8823108
>when the smell of moderately fresh fish
But the only thing that should smell like fish is rotten fish
t. visitor to the seafood section in a chinese market (Specifically Chinese, the Koreans are at least classy about it

>>8823894
>They all gasped at my admission

lolwut?

I was so pissed coming back from the pub last night I was doing forward rolls every time I bent over to tie my lace.

>>8824018
Been there. Baptists are deluded and they were shocked over the admission of one beer in 15 months I had.
Naturally I started drinking again.

>>8823190
you'd be surprised how many faggots eat vegan cheese voluntarily

>>8822764
No, no your not. North Louisiana maybe but who the hell cares about that?>>8823011
If.your from Austin, of which I spent three years, you wouldn't know what "real" Cajun good taste like.

If the place had a bottle Louisiana brand hot sauce on the table, it's shit.

>>8823160
In some places with right marketing he would have thrived.

>>8823477
It's a kind of nice but sad feeling knowing place like that. Good to go, not so good to know they're fucked

>Cajun place opens in what is almost literally a hole in the wall.
>Place looks like it used to be a storage shed
>Try it out because love Cajun food.
>>Side note: The thing about Cajun food is that it is extremely easy to fuck up. You are either some kind of Cajun food wizard and you know how to make some of the most amazing food that has ever been cooked... or you fuck it up and you make godawful garbage that tastes like shit. There is no such thing as "ok" or "good" or "decent" Cajun food. Its either "amazing" or "disgusting"
>This place turns out to be the latter.
>Barely ever has more than one car in parking lot and looks dead
>Place is next to a mechanic
>Moron who owns failing Cajun place constantly runs outside screaming at anyone who parks in his empty lot because he assumes they are all customers for the mechanic
>Even if that were true, why would you want an empty parking lot in front of your restaurant?
>Place quickly closes and turns into an authentic mexican restaraunt that does so well it opens multiple locations and starts a delivery service.

>>8824057
>If.your from Austin, of which I spent three years, you wouldn't know what "real" Cajun good taste like.
Being pretentious about cajun is a little much, anon. I said i live here, not from here. Way to signal

>>8823767
>how do you even fuck up cajun stuff anyway?
You make it incorrectly. That's pretty much it. As long as you have the right ingredients and cook them right, it's wonderful. But people supplement the fuck out of cajun food for some reason.

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>>8823911
>follow directions
>get to the part with heat
>it goes to fucking hell and ends up tasting like shit

>>8820546
>pizza cheese

>>8820307
Its cheap and in brazil, of course its gonna be packed.

>>8823160
Its not stupid to open a vegan restaurant. Its stupid to open one in a place with no demand for it. Lots of buddhists eat vegetarian after all.

>>8823813
Dude probably had a heart attack and thats why it closed xD.

>>8821510
Porsche, BMW, Mercedes, and Toyota

The four pillars of Luxury Automotive

>>8821539
wud the fuggg ::DDDd :DD

>>8821547
dont you have a mosque to shoot up jacques?

>>8821387
Louisiana?

>>8821718
Some places will close because of shit landlords/rental situation or shit locations, but if it's in a mall I'm skeptical there's anything of quality worth ordering there.

The only advantage you could eek out of those places is if you're a mall rat and you befriend a qt bartender that overserves you drinks on the cheap. Otherwise it's just crap, all of it.

>>8824201
You're right, I apologise. You have to admit though those Cali transplant can be annoying.

>>8821681
Theres a place that opened nearby with a similar story called Vietnomz
Used to be a sushi place months before, its by a deserted Winn Dixie and a habeeb gas station with no gas

>>8821251
As a Georgian living in Canada, I feel the same whenever I go somewhere that claims to be "BBQ".

>>8824938
californians need to be physically removed

>>8824991
You live by Full Sail in FL, I'm assuming

>Applebees opens
>goes about 4 months before it closes
>some guy buys the building
>reopens it as some dumb name like Chads
>from what I can tell its the same menu as Applebees but slightly different
>goes about 4 months before it closes

>>8820038
Kansas City?

My ex's mother loved that place and took her husband there and he was always embarrassed to order.

Positive vibes killing everything.

>Italian restaurant in flyoverland
>Zero advertising
>No signs on or above the door
>No lights were ever on inside
>Remember hearing a waitress say the owner refused to pay her for the day because they did not get enough business
>Closed down after, I shit you not, 1 week

>>8823812
The old "every one who doesn't like gays is secretly gay" meme.

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>>8823102
This prick, opens crisp sandwich shop in poor Northern market town with a huge paki population. Closed after 3 months due to health and not down to over priced crap competing with halal fried chicken or low budget kebab shops

>>8821704
>>Everything was fried or smothered in gravy
>>Apple sauce was at least 50% cinnamon
>>Meatloaf tasted like gravy
im not seeing the problem

>>8820453
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q0kn7AwbSU0

>>8823370
It was more than likely freshly ground and therefore fine to eat medium/medium rare, and you're a pansy.

>>8821936
>the a Californian fleeing

I promise to vote red and am at least opening a business

>>8826081
>im a stupid phone poster too

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>>8818792
>working door at a bar while in college
>Wendy's burger joint across the street closes after years
>replaced by fried chicken joint
>bought by an Indian who hires Mexicans that can't speak English to run it
>calls it "Nigger's Fried Chicken"
>just straight up steals Aunt Jemima and uses her as his restaurant logo
>town board and niggers go apeshit and ask him to change the name
>he wins court case to keep the name but is forced to remove Aunt Jemima as his mascot
>replaces her with a Sambo looking character
>goes out of business a little over a year later
>only customers were black people

The chicken was actually pretty decent....

>>8826114
>umm! umm! mm
what the fuck kind of eating noises are those
also where was this? what college?

>>8826114
I'm surprised that didn't make national news.

>>8820109
Sounds like /tv/'s nightmare

Scotfag here

>Place called Maggie's grill
>chairs were obviously taken from a charity shop
>"M" on the sign outside has fallen and turned into a W
>everything on the menu is beef
>waitress actually squeezes a sauce bottle in front of you when you ask for some
>room is lit by energy saving lightbulbs so it looks like im in a found footage film
>eat my steak
>burnt on the outside, freezing cold on the inside
>waitress asks for tip mid way through the meal

Imagine going to dinner at your cheapskate friends house and they ask you to pay 20 bongs for the service.

>>8826470
>waitress asks for tip mid way through the meal

Come on, you're fucking with us right? Even rude Chinese waiters don't do this.

>>8821269
Ah...thank God I live in Mobile, the Catholics know how to have a good time

With good food too

>>8820571
a yaris? whoah!

>>8826478
They're Scots, what did you expect? I'm surprised they didn't rent the chairs to him.

Restaurant called "Build".
Theme of architecture & building.
The hook? They sell pizza. Oh, and you get to "build" your pizza by choosing ingredients.
But! This is not just any pizzeria! Oh no! Their individual sized pizzas are at least $15/pop.
Did not last long in our college town.

There's a run-down restaurant where I live that changes its name about once a month.

It was called "Chinese buffet" when I moved here. Since then it has become...

"Chinese-Japanese buffet"
"Buffet King"
"China King Buffet"
"China express"

...and just "Chinese"

Currently it is "Bowl Express."

>>8826831
how's the food though

>>8823370
>mfw I still have an "I Got Crabs From Dirty Dick's" shirt somewhere

>>8826853
I haven't dared. I went in there once to pick up a few pairs of chopsticks for a party and it was grimy and empty. No one was there, not even a cashier.

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>>8826860
i double-doggy dare you!

>>8826831
That's money laundering

>>8826901
That's how I feel about this one Japanese place near where I live.
There's never anyone there and there only seem to be one or two people on staff even though it's a decent-sized restaurant.
The weird part is that the food is really good, especially the sushi. I've been five or six times and only once has there been a single other party in the restaurant.

Am I supporting a Yakuza front?

>>8826470
Scaberdeen?

>>8826981
I wouldn't worry too much about japs, if they are actually japs that is. A lot of times you will just see a bunch of chinese people opening a japanese restaurant and everyone just believes they are japs.

Chinese people are usually more involved in crime.

>>8819535
>We're kind of proud of our cheese over here
Why? I've never had a Californian product that wasn't half as good and twice as expensive as something I could just ship in from somewhere else.

>>8819535
>We're kind of proud of our cheese over here.
that's nice but it's fucking Wisconsin, land of cheese
they will never be beaten
stick to your fancy wines

>>8826061
>eating a pink burger at a fast food joint, especially a chain
You clearly don't live in the US.

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>>8826831

>No grand asia super buffet

>>8820123
Fuck I know that one, its where they be mean to you and give you paper hats and shit
>tfw saw my teachers stumbling around drunk near there during middle school

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>>8818792
>place opens right next to my Jason's deli a few years ago called Big Pappa's burgers or something and replaces the belly dancing lounge
>stays there for maybe a year, everytime I pass by there's no customers
>it closes and moves to a trailer right outside some nasty strip club where the ladies give patrons crabs and some cartel shooting happened or something
>that closes as well and the owner moves the trailer right outside a fucking prison before closing forever

>>8826619
kek

>>8821602
Pretty much all the inner harbor restaurants are the same. I usually head over to Fell's Point whenever I'm in Baltimore, some places are shitty trendy bars but there are also a lot of really good restaurants with a good crowd.

>>8822637
I went to California this winter and was really surprised by out cheap all the food is. It was about 80% of the prices in chicago.

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>>8821433
>Bull and Bear
Was this the owner by any chance?

>>8826061
I ain't fucking with pink ground beef. Medium-well burgers for me.

>>8828729
How is your wife's son doing you dumb nigger. Weak cunts like you should get sick and die

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>>8821539
wut

>>8828751
>What is E. Coli?
Unless the server sticks a meat thermometer into the burger when she serves me, I'm not risking it
Pink steak is preferred though.

>>8828751
>>8828776 (cont. because I'm retarded and can't collect my thoughts)
And you best believe that I'm not eating a pink burger at a place called fucking Dirty Dicks

>>8826142
>where was this?

Jersey, right across the river from Philly.

Was a place on main st in my hometown that cycled thru some shitty hipster place, a nice bbq place that just moved, then finally a mexican place that's pretty p good and actually gets business.

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>>8818792
The place was called Orbital Grill
it was right next to a really good movie theatre, but the food there was literally worse than cafeteria food
apparently it was some local mogul's idea of "helping the local economy"
a Moe's soon moved in to the building

>>8823813

mad respect though.

i can understand why he'd want to operate a restaurant by himself. i've worked with some lazy ass motherfuckers.

>>8828968
Moe's is shit too, though

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>>8828968
>The place was called Orbital Grill
how were their sides

>>8821433
>They didn't have to change names.
homosexual here, had a hearty laugh at this

>>8829071
puuuuurty good

>live across the street from a take out pizza place "antonio's pizza"
>installs this custom, nice looking neon sign
>go in there first night its re-opened from previous failure
>owner is a greasy guido guy, suspiciously amicable but confrontational
>pizza was pretty decent tho
>eventually see him coming and going from the restaurant at ALL hours of the night with other people
>shady
>always driving a different luxury car BLASTING shitty club rap music
>after a couple months restaurant eventually stops being open at regular, predictable times
>obviously a front for drugs
>one morning at like 5:30 in the middle of the summer one of Tony's henchmen/employees is standing out on the corner of the street yelling and trying to sell some bags of coffee beans from walgreens. he asks me as i step in my car on the way to work, and i say no. continues trying to hawk this coffee.
>wtf
>place closes and Tony goes to prison for drug trafficking, cocaine, as i guessed

>>8829657
they'd also have full blown yelling and screaming arguments and fights outside of the restaurant, at the weirdest times; like 4 am on a tuesday.

it since was re-opened under new owners as a thai place, some very uncomfortably anxious and putzy white guy, and his (presumably) thai wife in their 50s. food was good tho.

they still have that neon antonios pizza sign in the shape of the italy boot hanging above.

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this shit is the fucki

>>8829815
ng worst. was in richmond va on tour and it came highly recommended as the best drunk food for a great value, but everything was cold and dry and it took forever. fuck cookout.

>>8829815
Antonio finally took him out

>>8829815
Fuck you Cookout is the shit.

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>>8823938
kek

>>8821701
>(gag)
Ok buttbuddy

>>8829657
I would totally get pizza there

>>8821660
Psychology here, you're projecting your own personal failures and addictions onto the community around you. Seek help.