If you owned a movie theater, what sort of food would you serve?

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>>8805488
various dishes containing pig

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>>8805488
For me, it's a glass of pure water.

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>>8805488
dumplings served w/ tiny plastic forks

An upscale movie theater would be interesting. There would be balcony dining tables.

rissoto and crakers

I'd serve really loud foods like raw celery

Eating real food at a theater is such a meme. I go to the Alamo Drafthouse sometimes and it's just annoying more than anything.

Though i would like to see theaters serve milkshakes because i can't sneak in a milkshake like i do with my sandwiches

Fuck off back to your containment board.

Surstromming with onions, served on large tortilla chips

There's a movie theatre here that doesn't allow anybody under 21 in, you get these lovely huge reclining chairs with dedicated cupholders and arm rests, they staggered the height of the rows so it's completely impossible for some fuck to block the view, they serve cocktails, wine, beer, directly to you and even have a dinner service with anything from a turkey club to lobster tail.

It's fucking great. Costs a shitload though.

unbuttered, unsalted popcorn to piss off all the fat fucks

First for crab legs

>>8805705
oh damn that would be nice

Good to see /tv/ is still trying to ruin this place even further.

Popcorn, Pick & Mix, Candy and nuts in small boxes rather than wrappers, ice cream.

Any form of Drink at reasonable prices.

Noisy food is fucking disgusting to deal with while trying to watch a film. I can understand it in a huge, shlocky blockbuster super hero film, but in anything involving more than explosions and quips, why the fuck do you want to be eating a meal, you should be paying attention, QUIETLY, to the screen.

>Went to go see Arrival on my own one night in London
>Hyped because Villeneuve
>Quiet, large room, perhaps a Dozen people in a regular, middle range sized screen.
>Film about to begin, sweaty plump man with huge rucksack comes shambling in and sits behind me
>I have best seat in the place, dead center, 2/3rds of the way up the seating in those large, slightly more expensive seats you get nowadays.
>he proceeds to fuck with the first 10 minuets of the film eating his food
>the SECOND he takes it out of his rucksack I can smell it
>from the noise, duration, smell and sound of his meal I can only assume it was the best part of a full Sunday roast sandwiched between two halves of an entire french loaf, wrapped in three or four layers of tin foil
>tut and look back him every now and again, shaking my head
>he stops eating it halfway through and shoves it back in his bag
>thankfuckforthattimetorelax
>throughly enjoy film
>he gets up and leaves half an hour before it ends, for what reason I do not know, presumably to scarf down the rest in the bathroom before leaving

I'm sure I come across as a douchebag. I love food, love big meals, love eating lots, love drinking good things, love cooking, don't give a fuck about people eating food in strange environments (Office, train, bus, pavement, anything). But you go to the Cinema to watch a film, so watch the fucking film, especially if it is a serious film.

Basically, stereotypical Cinema food and drink, with a Bar in the lobby before the film. Quiet fucking food.

>>8805809
How will that stop them from bring a thermos of melted butter and a bag of salt.

>>8805869
full bodysearch for fatsos

Ribs, but I wouldn't provide any napkins.

>>8805488
My gun range serves crab legs.

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>>8805488

>>8805946
wtf wheres the anvil checkin

>>8805488
my fat nuts

>>8805488
Are they snow crab legs? I heard that king crab legs can be salty as fuck. I love the sweetness of snow.

>>8805994
Stone crab a best.

>popcorn is the main staple of move theaters
>all they do with it is butter and salt
Why? There's so much you can do with popcorn

>>8806094
AMC theaters just announced they're rolling out cheese and caramel flavoring so that's something

>>8806098
>No bacon and habanero
Boring!

>>8805913
So people rub their hands on the seats.

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>>8805506
this

>>8805544
This

>>8805488
Each movie would have a hand selected movie and drink to complement it.

Seats would be massive leather recliners with tray tables.

>>8805855
You sound like a jerk. I'm all for people being quiet and polite in a theatre, but food doesn't bother me, just plastic wrappers over and over, people talking at full volume, and if you sit behind a guy texting with his full brightness on his phone. There's always a parent with 4 children, probably custody visit, who can't be free enough to actually go to the movies, so they do work the whole time on their phone, or maybe they're on 4chan.

I did see some people complain this one time in a theatre over a baby stroller going down the aisle for an R rated film. It was before previews, that lights on waiting thing. These old women in front of me at the end of an aisle clearly went to tell a manager...no sooner did they come back to their seats, when the lights went down, the loud preview started, and then the baby started crying, so I was like, ohhkay, I guess that won't last, which is good. And the mother stood up, grabbed her one toddler in one hand, and the baby under her other arm, and pushed that stroller up the aisle dragging that toddler along. It was then that I realized the baby was vomiting...projectile vomiting...and it was like a firehouse with great distance. Bam! Right on the old geezers at the end of my row. Covered in vomit.
I felt like oh wow, that's some kind of karma for people being bitchy. Also, I didn't realize that the term "projectile" really did in fact get named well until I saw it in action for the first time.

>love me some crab legs when I'm watching Fast and Furious 14.

Alamo Drafthouse is pretty comfy for meal + movie.

>>8806094
Should get Garrets Popcorn to install a movie theater stand.

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Stop eating crab

>>8805488
>If you owned a movie theater, what sort of food would you serve? Me? I'd serve crab legs.
I would serve what I consider a treat while I'm at home watching a movie.

At home, I like my chili lime popcorn, homemade of course. I saute sliced rings of ancho chilies in olive oil til crispy and toasted, and pour them over my popcorn, add some lime zest, squeeze of lime, an dlots of sea salt. Sometimes I think out the spicy chili oil with some real butter.
Look at how popular Takis are with the next generation!!! It'll rock!

Also, I love fresh pork rinds, but you can also toast up some packaged rinds on a cookie sheet after hitting them with copious amounts of Cholula, Tapatio or Crystal. It dries some of the hot sauce moisture and warms them up nicely til they're poppin crisp again. Think salt and vinegar potato chips with the amount of vinegar in a Crystal. Awesome.

^^ Enjoy the above with ice cold beer of choice

Caramel Orville, the one with the slab of caramel you slice into squares and place over the corn? Too much caramel. This extra caramel allows you to dump about a cup of deluxe mixed nuts, and the lets you make your own nutty mix. If you own a candy thermometer and feeling adventurous, making your own isn't difficult either.

The perfect salty, sweet, crunchy, gooey treat is a bar cookie, namely a 7 layer bar, so you can get that sweetened condensed milk flavor with the coconut with your chocolate graham cookie. It's all there. Ice cold milk, or milkshake is a good accompaniment. I guess you could turn that into a Bailey's milkshake.

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chocolate wonderfalls at the end of each aisle

>>8805488
I would put a salad bar in front of the first row of seats.

>>8806348
Babies ruin movies. When you commit to getting pregnant without a father, you commit to not going out in public until the brat learns not to cry and vomit over people.

>>8805488
i love this thread every time you post it, seriously.

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Each seat will come a tray that holds one loaf of bread. A toaster. A can opener. A butter knife. And pic related.

Each seat needs at least one sink and hand soap and towel so you can wash between bites.

>>8805855
you sounds like a huge cunt

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>>8806348
>baby in r rated movie
>crying n puking upon introduction
>customers who didnt want their experience ruined by another persons lack of responsibility and common courtesy
>karma
Pic related

>>8805808
are you in orange county?

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>>8806538
>my reading comprehension sucks massive ass

kys you fucking moron

>>8806585
No you

>>8805488
BORDERLINE
EXPERIMENTAL

As for me, I'd serve no food. Drinks only.

The McChicken, the best fast food sandwich

>>8805488
fuck you if you think anyone is going to be able to pay attention to a movie in a room full of people cracking crab legs.

>>8805488
>Our melted butter sales are low this month and Corporate is getting on my ass. What can we do?
>I've got it! Let's serve crab legs!

>>8805855
You sound completely reasonable and I'd feel the same way.
+1

All you can eat free pretzels, salty bar mix, and salted peanuts.

Only water is free 4oz cup, one per customer one at a time.

$8 fountain soda.

No bottled drinks.

>>8806925
>>8806925
water is 10 dollars and you thoroughly check backpacks.

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The theater in a small town I lived in 13-14 years ago used to serve pizzas, and instead of regular theater seats, there were small tables and chairs. A couple months before moving away, a friend and I had some extra money so we watched Cat in the Hat while splitting a large pepperoni pizza. It cost us about $30 total for the tickets and pizza, not a bad price at all. So yeah, I'd serve pizzas.

I knew it

I haven't seen this thread in a very long time and I've never posted in it before. You people thought I never noticed it..too bad for you, I made a mental note

so..this really is just a simulation after all

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>>8805488
pizza pops and deep fried pizza pops and mountain dew and deep fried pizza pops

>>8806987

>anchorage, alaska. bear tooth theatre.

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>>8807053
Nope, the Stoughton Cinema Cafe in Stoughton, WI.

>>8805855
you sound like a completely average person. have a good day anon

I go to expensive theatres but I never get the food or drink. I just don't like being around niggers.

>>8805798
You pleb. Put the milkshake into a tumbler or insulated container with a locking lid.

>>8805798
>>8807118
This. I sneak homemade coffee drinks in all the time in tight sealing, well insulated thermoses all the time.

>>8805488
I would not.

Bring your own food if you want to eat while watching a movie, but spills will be fined the cost of cleaning the seat.
The floor will be clean, the seats comfy, the movies carefully selected, children excluded, alcohol served, noisy people thrown out on the spot, phones jammed in the building, and a monthly membership fee levied.
And the toilets will have the movie shown on small screens in case you need to piss during an important scene.

>>8807784
don't forget no singles

>>8806925
should up charge for coke zero and other diet sodas as well. make it $12.

>>8806994
>tin foil heat detected
He's on to us, boys.

>>8807784
>Phones jammed
>Can't call 911
>doctors, first responders, anybody of importance, can't go
>FCC exist

>>8808387

The landlines operated by the staff wouldn't be jammed, anon. You'll be OK without your precious phone toy for the 3 hours it takes to watch your movie.

>>8807066
I don't want to come off like an ass, but that theatre looks terrible.
What happens if you're in the back?

Peanuts, peanuts are better than pop corn, they should serve it more often.

>>8805838
shut the fuck up faggot. this is purely a /ck/ thread.

>>8807028
is that the woo thang clan?

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>>8807066
>can only see half the screen
>People constantly eating, drinking, belching, clanging silverware in your way
>two thirds of the seating is facing a wrong wall
what a fucking nightmare.

Crab legs don't seem like a good fit for a movie theater. I mean you'd have to have some sort of container to hold them in that could easily be held in one hand (like popcorn) and some place to put the shells. Seems messy and also seems like a heavy meal. Most people eat dinner or lunch before or after a movie and they just get popcorn or a soda to snack on. I guess if I owned one personally I would jazz the menu up and offer something other than popcorn and nachos though, maybe corn dogs or pulled pork sandwiches.

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>>8810632
>holding popcorn in one hand

>>8805540
>giving distilled water

>popcorn
>nachos
>candy
>hot dogs
>veggie dogs
>burgers
>veggie burgers
>fries
>pan pizzas
>sandwiches
>wraps

basically if it needs the use of a utensil, it's out

>>8805488
>go see Kizumonogatari 1, 2, & 3
>only theater showing it is one where there are waiters in the fucking theater running back in forth in front of you during the movie
>movie 1 waiter stumbles over my feet in the dark during the film bringing someone their shit
>movie 2 I decide to order a beer before the movie starts
>waiter who is likely younger than I am laughs a when I ask for a Shiner
>get brought my check when the movie has about 15 minutes left
>~8 minutes later guy walks up blocks the screen and tells me to pay the check
>this is all while the movie is going on and I'm trying to read subtitles
>whothefuckthinksthisisagoodidea.png
>movie 3 tell the waitress to not bother me as I won't be ordering anything
>stumbles over the feet of the guy next to me

Who the fuck is ordering burgers and tendies in the middle of a movie? I'll never understand this bullshit

>>8805488
Hate to break it to you, but theaters push the popcorn and soft drinks, with extortionate prices, simply because they can mark it up so high. It's how they make their money.

If you want to operate a charity making a perferct movie experience, that's fine, but expect to go broke.

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Whose idea was it to have one of the loudest snacks be a movie food anyway?

>>8805908
What if they pay a hobo or a prostitute to bring it in for them?
Would also get them past the no singles policy I guess.

>>8805793
this made me chuckle

Popcorn and candy.
People would also be able to watch movies if they wanted.

Szechuan nuggies :^)

>>8805809

You'd at least put some olive oil and black pepper on them, right? Unseasoned popcorn is shit.

>>8805946
Why the fuck would a movie theater have showers?

>>8811399
GO BACK TO POL YOU FUCKING RACIST YOU RUIN EVERY FUCKING BOARD!!!!! CHINESE PEOPLE DONT DESERVE YOUR WHITE WASHING YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!

>>8807784
>alcohol served, noisy people thrown out on the spot
Oxymoron.

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>wide variety of dim sum, jiaozi and buns that aren't overpriced out the ass
>you are encouraged to bring a concealed firearm provided that you aren't a retard and knows how to properly use one

There, I saved movies

>>8811441
Only because ameritards can't handle their drink and have no sense of restraomt/

>>8811422
>Why the fuck would a movie theater have showers?

They have them in all the theaters in the inner cities so you don't have to sit next to a stank ass Nigger for 2 hours.

>>8806109
Yes my dear, exactly.

>>8811422
If you don't pass the mandatory penis inspection you are carted off to the "showers"

Wouldnt serve anything at all. Eating at a movie theather is a disgusting amerifat habit that spread to the rest of the world. Im there to immerse myself in the movie experience and not to obnoxiously and loudly stuff myself with food like a pig.

>>8806585
>>8806348
I didn't quite understand the story either. The old geezers dindu nuffin.

>>8805488
that would be noisy as shit, OP. worse than popcorn. fuck off. but admittedly it would be fantastic if not for the noise

>>8810620
Hi grandma. How are you liking the internet ?

>>8805798
I've got two theaters in my area that serve milkshakes.

>>8811402
>black pepper and olive oil
shit, I wish there was anywhere that served popcorn that way

>>8807784
I'd love that last one, but the MPAA would never fucking allow it.

>>8811066
in-seat ordering is fucking retarded
but on the plus side, the one theater I go to that has it, no one really bothers with it

>>8805869
>implying they wouldn't just guzzle down a frothy mixture of salt and butter without any popcorn

>>8806348
>I'm all for people being quiet and polite in a theatre, but food doesn't bother me, just plastic wrappers over and over, people talking at full volume, and if you sit behind a guy texting with his full brightness on his phone
so fucking glad I haven't had to deal with this shit

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>>8812740
>fantastic

>>8805705
dumb idea. Uncomfortable. Where I live we have theaters with huge reclining seats that have waiters that serve alcohol and a full menu of food from their kitchen throughout the movie. Sorry that you live in flyover country.

>>8805855

>I don't give a fuck about people eating food in strange environments (Office, train, bus, pavement, anything)
>But you go to the Cinema to watch a film
>>I don't give a fuck about people eating food in strange environments (Office, train, bus, pavement, anything)
>office
But you go to work to accomplish the job's task.
>train
But you go on the train to efficiently get to places.
>bus
see above
>anything
except movie theaters. No one eats while watching tv or movies. TV dinners aren't real.

See the problem is that you're an adult with Aspergers and a low IQ. You're too stupid to have beliefs based on the same logic and sperg out when someone triggers you.

>>8806360
sup NOVA bro

>>8806585
nah he's right. Did you even read your own story? Either you're incredibly dumb and can't properly convey an idea or honestly think she deserved that shit when the bitch mom thought bringing a toddler in a loud theater was a good idea. New borns have sensitive hearing. I know this as some loser that will probably never have kids. The "mom" should know this as well. Feel sorry for that kid for having such a shitty mother. Feel sorry for your mother for raising such a shitty kid. Maybe woman like her made men like you actualities.

>>8806451
This. thanks for the posts, OP.

>>8805488
Spicy Chinese food