How do I cook a turkey and not fuck it up? My work gave me one

>>8325436
Just boil it for a couple of hours.

>>8325436
Carve it up and cook the pieces separately. Roasting it whole makes it nearly impossible to get the whole thing cooked through without also overcooking some parts of it.

>>8325436
Brine before roasting.
Don't stuff the turkey with anything more than some aromatic herbs because stuffing just adds to the cooking time of the thickest parts, meaning the thinner parts get dried out by the time the thick parts are cooked.
Brush that fucker with butter, fat, or something to help crisp up the skin and form a barrier to retain moisture.

>>8325436
>>8325623
>Brine before roasting.
This. Definitely. But instead of brushing with butter or your chosen fat (which should be butter), put butter under the skin, and don't skimp! Extra points if you put herbs in the butter first.

>>8325436
Deep frying is the only way