Hey, /ck/. What's the healthiest or, if that's not

Give the kids trail mix and the parents Donald Trump campaign literature

I don't know but when I lived in a 99% mexican apartment complex I forgot to buy candy and gave each kid a packet of ramen. From then on I was treated like a Messiah.

>>8174065
Dystopia

>healthiest
>most interesting

pick one

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Chick tracts.

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These are pretty good, if you can find them. A little expensive to be handing out to kids but whatever.

Alternatively you can give tiny potato chip bags.

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Can't say this isn't interesting....

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Cyanide coated with almond chocolate, fuckers won't be able to egg you when they convulse on the pavement, mouth foaming, eyes bulging and bloodshot, their brief meaningless extortionist lives seeping through the very ground into the hell they deserve.

>>8174083
I live in just such a place and am now tempted to try this.

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:)

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>>8174806
or you an use whatever you have available

>>8174808
*can

I just watched reviews on this 99%, how do you even use this? No one can eat it raw, do you use it for a more made from scratch kind of cake or cookie where you add the sugar?

>>8174897
You put a square under your tongue and smoke a cigar

>>8174808
This is fake btw

>>8174897
Cooking or whwn smoking

Packets of roasted salted peanuts. Low sugar, tasty, nutritious.

>>8173929
Necco wafers, or gum

>>8173929
mini ritter german chocolates

>>8173929
Wew lad, I've had the 91% cocoa and it was really good after I acquired the taste for it but I feel like 99% would taste like putting a spoonful of cocoa powder in my mouth.

>>8174124
Man I knew a guy who would leave Chick Tracts in public places every now and then. Some of them are pretty hardcore.

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hilarious

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>>8175142

>>8175142
>>8175146
They'll learn. Kids' taste buds are overly sensitive to anything bittersweet as a primitive defense mechanism against poisonous fruits and spoiled milk.

>>8174806
I remember when this got posted like in 2009!

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>>8175167
>7 years and still here

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>>8174083
>tfw tried this last year
>bought several flavors of dry ramen noodles
>waited for kids to come to my house
>one kid came and asked how to eat them
>thought it would be cute to show him
>went and boiled water in the microwave
>came back out and put some ramen noodles into the kids candy bucket
>poured over the boiling water
>didn't see he had candy, bucket looked empty in the dark
>kid smells his candy start to melt
>panics
>drops the bucket
>hot water burns his feet
>he starts crying
>have to call an ambulance because I poured boiling water on a kids feet

Had a hard time preventing his parents suing me

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>dark chocolate
yeah because lead and cadmium are so healthy for children

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>>8175754
This is so autistic I don't even know where to start.

What made you think a trick-or-treater's bucket would be empty?
Why was it THAT dark in your house?
What compelled you to bring a stranger's child into your home?
What compelled you to use his Halloween bucket for fucking instant ramen?
Do you not have bowls?
Did you intend on having him stay in your home and eat it?
How the hell did you think that would sound when he told his parents?
Did you plan on cleaning the bucket afterwards?
Why in god's name did you fucking buy ramen as a Halloween handout instead of candy?

Holy SHIT.

What made you think a trick-or-treater's bucket would be empty?
>It was dark and only the start of the night
Why was it THAT dark in your house?
>No porch light
What compelled you to bring a stranger's child into your home?
>I bought the water to him
What compelled you to use his Halloween bucket for fucking instant ramen?
>Improvising
Do you not have bowls?
>Not clean ones
Did you intend on having him stay in your home and eat it?
>No, was a demonstration
How the hell did you think that would sound when he told his parents?
>Why would he?
Did you plan on cleaning the bucket afterwards?
>No
Why in god's name did you fucking buy ramen as a Halloween handout instead of candy?
>Cheaper

>>8175754
>went and boiled water in the microwave
Asshole.

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>>8175785
The answers just make it worse.

>>8175785
So instead your plan was to send a little boy off into the night with a plastic bucket sloshing with boiling water and soggy noodles. Holy christ.

>>8175773
Hey, cadmium eggs are pretty good, even if they are smaller than they used to be.

>>8173929
give them milk

>>8175785
Have you ever brought home a passed-out woman on the verge of alcohol poisoning and attempted to nurse her back to health by forcefeeding her eggs?

Kids don't want healthy or interesting, if you buy them actually good chocolate it's just a waste on them. Save the Michel Cluizel for yourself

>>8173929
You have two choices, ample generous handfuls of lower priced candy to make them happy at your two-handfuls of generosity, or the better chocolate items that are the most popular, in the fun-shaped fun-themed halloween edition. Do you have a precious few trick or treaters? Give out full sized candy bars. Just imagine which candy they can take out at lunch time at school to awe their classmates.

The big costume theme this coming year is the "superhero" comic type. Is there a superhero themed chocolate? Any Harley Quinn chocolates?

>>8173929
any sugar free candy filled with maltilol or sorbitol.

>>8174083
that's not a bad idea, maybe I should make grab bags with ramen, oatmeal, granola bars or those little bags of beef jerky

>>8173929
Movie theater crab legs.

>>8175075
>fake

prove it.

Leave your lights off. Kids will ignore your house entirely.

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>>8173929
>most interesting

>>8176894
>interestingest

>>8176908
kek

Nah, I just meant I don't think those are healthy, but they'll make kids talk.

>don't give out candy
>house gets egged
>I rent
Ask me if I give a fuck.